Kelly recommends taking from other people

[Childless]

What about people like me? I had every intention of breastfeeding, but my milk never came in. My son had to be on formula for his entire infancy. And expensive formula at that because of allergies. We're lucky. I have a good job and he's our only child. But, what if we were poor and already had 6 or 7 kids? How would we have paid for the formula? My son also had a medical issue that required him to be in orthotic equipment for 6 months. The cost of the equipment plus the cost of a monthly trip to the orthotic center (an hour and a half away) for adjustments plus the cost of 3 trips to the children's hospital (an hour away) was nearly $3000 (and we have good insurance). My son also has eczema and needs medication for it. I also had a rough childbirth experience that ended up in an emergency c-section and triggered jaundice in my son. We were at the hospital for 4 days and my son had to be on a billi-blanket for a week. We did a very good job of saving money and budgeting everything. We had a plan put together shortly after I found out I was pregnant and we stuck to it. We even had a full year of diapers bought. What we didn't plan for were all the medical issues that came up. You can't plan for those, but they are a possibility you need to think about. It's why we're only planning on having 2 children (and still sometimes think about stopping with the one we have).

[GolightlyGrrl]

Hmm, childbirth is natural, Kelly? Tornadoes are natural, too. Oh, wait a minute. Tornadoes are blessings because they allow Kelly to get a bunch of free, new stuff.

[Mythicwings]

The way I see it, if God allegedly got a virgin pregnant, then birth control shouldn't even be a blip on his radar.

oh my god I love you

[Mythicwings]

Kelly says:

Whatever you believe about children, at least make sure it is logical and that you don’t let wrong thinking add to the cultural lies that have been fueled by ignorance.

This is what drives my brain to TRY AND TRY to understand their thinking, because they are somehow convinced it is logical thinking. My father is a deep thinker and regularly writes sermons and essays which he thinks are rational but are circular thinking, on top of believing bull crap, and yet he can also say something like Kelly, quoted above. He thinks that the people who do understand deductive reasoning, and people who use it professionally like scientists, just don't understand the GOD-given logic that makes no sense at all. I have wasted SO much time trying to understand it and it drives me up the wall (like now! :lol: )

edited to add "Kelly says" at the top of the quote, because without that anyone would have to assume it came out of the moth of an actual logical person.

[Buggaboo]

In her recent post on GC, Kelly makes the argument that since giving birth is "natural", people should give have babies all the time.

A commenter writes in--what about financial hardship? What if we don't have any money?

Kelly forgets to mention how she lives on her parents land, used to live in their house, and how her husband was employed by her dad. Instead, she says,

Take, take, take. This woman does nothing but take from others to meet her own needs.

http://www.generationcedar.com/main/201 ... ment-79868

Well, you can't breast feed them forever. And that's just throwing her own shallow, overly simplistic way of thinking right back at her. Without even scratching the surface of the other issues she's apparently too dumb to address, or is willfully NOT addressing because she doesn't want to acknowledge them.

This only furthers my opinion that the vast majority of fundies are living in little card houses that would fall down quickly if they had to think for themselves for any length of time. They stay cut off from other opinions, other lifestyles; surrounded by people who only affirm their narrow beliefs and well armed with pre-approved, snappy responses to give anyone who tries to water down the kool aid. :evil:

[Olivia]

A baby can be cheap if you're lucky (but no responsible parent can count on that), but it doesn't last.

That's what kills me - trust God to provide for His blessings? Last I checked, it seemed like all that matters is our spiritual well-being, because an awful lot of babies with believing parents starved throughout history and still do today. So He might want us to think through the logistics.

[ilovetchotchkes]

Babies can be cheap if and this is a huge if: you are lucky enough to be able to breast feed and you already have a stash of cloth diapers from the previous kid and if you have family with kids slightly older who give you hand me downs. Once they get a bit older, like after a year... They get expensive fast! And a lot of people do not have circumstances like this. I think too what our dear fundie friends are neglecting to realize is that a lot of mothers work, in my area, one kid in daycare is equal to a mortgage payment.

I'm lucky, my family was insanely generous w my son and threw me one hell of a baby shower. I didn't need anything. For girl tchotchkes no shower but I already had a lot of stuff and i happened to time my pregnancy really well as my sister in laws baby is 3 months older and I have a steady stream of barely worn clothes. That's with two kids though, stuff wears out! and eventually inlawbabytchotchkes and baby tchotchkes will even up in size.

Expecting people to give you everything you need, it's hilarious, most of our fundies think government aid is evil and of the devil, yet they expect to be taken care of because they follow a certain theology and refuse to use common sense re: family size.

[VaSportsMom]

Did she breastfeed the entire family?

And I'm pretty sure it's considered tasteless to have a shower of any sort after your first child.

When I had my first son my closest friends threw me a wonderful shower. When I had my baby 5 years later, I lived in another state and the girls I worked with threw me a 2nd surprise shower. While I extremely grateful and blessed by both showers there is no way in hell my boys made it through their first month expense free, forget the first year. Little things are always popping up - Tylenol, a lost pacifier and they won't take any other brand, and so many other things that are completely normal and "expected" when there are babies in the house.

[Rosa]

also, IF you are lucky and everyone's healthy.

I got pre-eclampsia in pregnancy AND my son had failure to thrive toward the end, so I had an emergency c-section and a preemie. A healthy, very low-intervention not super early preemie who still had to be in the hospital a week and came home nursing but unable to regulate his own body temperature.

Hospital charges (to my insurer): nearly $100,000.

If I'd done one of these "trust the lord" home births, definitely one of us would have died. Probably both (turned out his cord was abnormal so as it got crowded in there the blood supply was crimped; when I was in labor it was repeatedly completely cut off for minutes at a time.) Though maybe that's the plan for these fundies; let the expensive ones die.

[ilovetchotchkes]

also, IF you are lucky and everyone's healthy.

I got pre-eclampsia in pregnancy AND my son had failure to thrive toward the end, so I had an emergency c-section and a preemie. A healthy, very low-intervention not super early preemie who still had to be in the hospital a week and came home nursing but unable to regulate his own body temperature.

Hospital charges (to my insurer): nearly $100,000.

If I'd done one of these "trust the lord" home births, definitely one of us would have died. Probably both (turned out his cord was abnormal so as it got crowded in there the blood supply was crimped; when I was in labor it was repeatedly completely cut off for minutes at a time.) Though maybe that's the plan for these fundies; let the expensive ones die.

Unless you're on the TLC gravy train that is...

[CrazySister]

When I had my first son my closest friends threw me a wonderful shower. When I had my baby 5 years later, I lived in another state and the girls I worked with threw me a 2nd surprise shower. While I extremely grateful and blessed by both showers there is no way in hell my boys made it through their first month expense free, forget the first year. Little things are always popping up - Tylenol, a lost pacifier and they won't take any other brand, and so many other things that are completely normal and "expected" when there are babies in the house.

Clearly you're not beating said kid hard enough. If you were parenting correctly said kid would willingly take whatever pacifier you offered and thank you for it! :doh:

Welcome to FJ! :) ...just figured out you're not new, just few posts... :oops:

[desertvixen]

Expecting a baby shower to set your child up in clothing, furniture, car seats and diapers from birth to toddler is just ridiculous and greedy.

This. I'd like to have a shower the next time around, but at this rate there will be something like an 8 year gap between the MV and any future children. Needless to say, I have given away pretty much ALL the big stuff to other moms who needed it.

But yes, showers shouldn't be intended to cover all the big stuff.

[salsa]

Expecting people to give you everything you need, it's hilarious, most of our fundies think government aid is evil and of the devil, yet they expect to be taken care of because they follow a certain theology and refuse to use common sense re: family size.

But what fundies are given is given by GOD! Not the ebil gubment. :roll:

[Parkersmom120106]

These people make me so crazy with the "children are a blessing not a curse" crap. I do not see my son as a curse at all, in fact, I see him as quite the blessing. I don't believe in God, but having my son turned my life around and made so many good things happen for me. Just because I don't want to have 20 kids doesn't mean that I see them as a curse in any way shape or form. I don't want my baby to cry for his/her mommy and get big sister instead. SMH. I really have to stop letting them get to me lol.

[ilovetchotchkes]

These people make me so crazy with the "children are a blessing not a curse" crap. I do not see my son as a curse at all, in fact, I see him as quite the blessing. I don't believe in God, but having my son turned my life around and made so many good things happen for me. Just because I don't want to have 20 kids doesn't mean that I see them as a curse in any way shape or form. I don't want my baby to cry for his/her mommy and get big sister instead. SMH. I really have to stop letting them get to me lol.

Exactly! while I LOVE my kids and i'd love more, I know, realistically, that attention wise, two or at most three is the only way they're actually going to get raised by ME.

[VaSportsMom]

Clearly you're not beating said kid hard enough. If you were parenting correctly said kid would willingly take whatever pacifier you offered and thank you for it! :doh:

Welcome to FJ! :) ...just figured out you're not new, just few posts... :oops:

LOL, I knew I was doing something wrong. The boys are 12 & nearly 17 now so I guess it's too late to correct it. I suppose I'll have to tie the pacifier on the end of a wet noodle and flog myself.

Thanks for the welcome anyway. I'm just more of a reader than poster.