Fundy encounter at the beach....of all places!

[Mamajane]

last week i was casually enjoying the hot humid day with my children at the beach. Than to my suprise i noticed a family 11 kids jumping in the water and swimming with clothes on....they had children around my kids age (2/3yrsold) so naturally they started playing together. The mother approached me and started asking me a ton of questions (which i was very weirded out by) than she got down to it....she asked, "are you a stay at home mother?" I said yes and this woman GRABBED my hands and started sobbing and praying for me. She was saying things like father protect this woman and let her feel the benefits of being a stay at home mother and helpmeet....she said their are no oher women like me anymore. I honestly did not know what to say....i didnt even know her name...than she asked if I homeschooled or plan on it and i said NO. she than tried to talk me into how much better it is and blah blah blah....seriously i just grabbed the kids and got into the car. I felt so disgusted by her. She was out of line grabbing me like that and pushing her beliefs upon me. Can I not go anywhere anymore lol????

[skrmom]

last week i was casually enjoying the hot humid day with my children at the beach. Than to my suprise i noticed a family 11 kids jumping in the water and swimming with clothes on....they had children around my kids age (2/3yrsold) so naturally they started playing together. The mother approached me and started asking me a ton of questions (which i was very weirded out by) than she got down to it....she asked, "are you a stay at home mother?" I said yes and this woman GRABBED my hands and started sobbing and praying for me. She was saying things like father protect this woman and let her feel the benefits of being a stay at home mother and helpmeet....she said their are no oher women like me anymore. I honestly did not know what to say....i didnt even know her name...than she asked if I homeschooled or plan on it and i said NO. she than tried to talk me into how much better it is and blah blah blah....seriously i just grabbed the kids and got into the car. I felt so disgusted by her. She was out of line grabbing me like that and pushing her beliefs upon me. Can I not go anywhere anymore lol????

I wonder if she was desarately lonely and you were the first female adult she had talked to in weeks?

[holierthanyou]

This is really disrespectful and I am certainly not advocating it, but when a stranger tried a similar "instantaneous prayer" with me over some non-sensical bonding moment, I just mimicked their behaviour and "prayed" right back for them aloud, asking God to let the scales fall from their eyes that they might come to embrace the beauty of the fact that they were currently hugging a lesbian made in God's image.

She backed the fuck off mighty quick.

But it was really rude of me (still find it kind of funny though in a childish way, I admit!).

[TXDuck]

I wonder if she was desarately lonely and you were the first female adult she had talked to in weeks?

This. Also, fundies aren't noted for their social skills. Sorry you got the full force of her lack of social graces and desperation.

Were the kids really swimming in clothes or those ridiculous "modest" swimsuits?

[Mamajane]

the kids were in full on clothes...it was sad! Girls in jumpers and long shirt and the boys in jeans and collard shirts....she had ELEVEN kids ranging from 12-10 months old! Thier was a set of twins but still! She looked to be only 30...I think she felt the need to pray for me bcs of my 2 years olds swim suit ;) I called my husband immediatly after i got in the car and he had a good long laugh lol! He says your alwasy on that damn snark board! I got the feeling she was depserate for some sort of adult communication but i think she got the hint that i was offended when i packed the kids and i up and stormed out of their....those fundies really have no shame!

[Deleted06]

This is really disrespectful and I am certainly not advocating it, but when a stranger tried a similar "instantaneous prayer" with me over some non-sensical bonding moment, I just mimicked their behaviour and "prayed" right back for them aloud, asking God to let the scales fall from their eyes that they might come to embrace the beauty of the fact that they were currently hugging a lesbian made in God's image.

She backed the fuck off mighty quick.

But it was really rude of me (still find it kind of funny though in a childish way, I admit!).

You are my hero!

[Talitha Cumi]

Weirdly, I like swimming in long dresses. The fabric swirls around my legs and feels so nice! I'd never make a kid do it, though. I hated it bad enough when my mom made me wear a t-shirt over my swimsuit to protect me from the sun. (In retrospect, thanks Mom!)

[Avalondaughter]

Yeah. That woman sounds like she's gone off the deep end. 11 kids? She must be trying to validate her lifestyle with someone, anyone.

I hope your kids didn't mind leaving the beach though. They were good sports!

[emmiedahl]

I had a fundie encounter today at a thrift store! A long skirts only, headcovering white woman with two African-American children. The boy was in a polo and pants, the girl was in a floor length denim skirt like Duggar girl. The little girl had very impressive and intricate braids with all kinds of colorful barrettes, so I noticed her right away. The family was in the same aisle as me, they were picking out little girl dresses while I was getting rock band tees for my little boy. My toddler started acting up; not a lot, just fussing with the seatbelt in the cart and being unhappy with shopping. The cute little fundie kids kept looking at me with big worried eyes, I hope they are not getting Pearl style upbringing.

They were really precious children, I hope their fundie mom knows that *she* is the lucky one and does not pull that adoption bullshit we read about here.

[margiebargie]

You are my hero!

Second.

I don't know what I'd do if I was cornered and groped and lectured at by a fundie. I wouldn't be too happy. I guess I have to treat fundies like I would a sketchy character on the street or a pushy salesman. Start with a stand-offish vibe, and switch up to "stern voice" if necessary. If all else fails - fight or flight.

[ladidah]

They were really precious children, I hope their fundie mom knows that *she* is the lucky one and does not pull that adoption bullshit we read about here.

Maybe they were her biological kids?

Anyway, about the bizarre adoption stuff that's shown up on FJ: I don't think one need assume that's the norm. I've known many conservative (fundamentalist/evangelical) families with white parents who've done transracial fostering and adoption because they wanted kids. Period. The "adoption-as-outreach" thing is an extremist, fringe movement in comparison.

[emmiedahl]

Maybe they were her biological kids?

Anyway, about the bizarre adoption stuff that's shown up on FJ: I don't think one need assume that's the norm. I've known many conservative (fundamentalist/evangelical) families with white parents who've done transracial fostering and adoption because they wanted kids. Period. The "adoption-as-outreach" thing is an extremist, fringe movement in comparison.

Maybe, but she was so, so pale, and they were so, so dark. It is still possible though, I apologize for making assumptions like that.

[Elle]

This is really disrespectful and I am certainly not advocating it, but when a stranger tried a similar "instantaneous prayer" with me over some non-sensical bonding moment, I just mimicked their behaviour and "prayed" right back for them aloud, asking God to let the scales fall from their eyes that they might come to embrace the beauty of the fact that they were currently hugging a lesbian made in God's image.

She backed the fuck off mighty quick.

But it was really rude of me (still find it kind of funny though in a childish way, I admit!).

Haha! Love this! And I don't think it was rude or childish. She's the one who started it, and you just put her in her place. If she had minded her manners, you wouldn't have sarcastically prayed and mentioned being a lesbian. Hopefully she'll think twice before invading the personal space of someone else.

[Beammeup]

I always wear a short skirt (thank you Lands End) when I swim, because I feel that the skirt covers my cellulite and no one wants to see that anyway. Plus I think it's cute. I do show off my tatas, so I don't think anyone would think I'm a fundie.

And the praying out of no where? Weird Weird Weird.

[ChickeyMonkey]

I always wear a short skirt (thank you Lands End) when I swim, because I feel that the skirt covers my cellulite and no one wants to see that anyway. Plus I think it's cute. I do show off my tatas, so I don't think anyone would think I'm a fundie.

And the praying out of no where? Weird Weird Weird.

Nothing to do with your post, but I have to say that I love your avatar! I particularly like this version from George Takei's FB page:

[Katiebug]

I always wear a short skirt (thank you Lands End) when I swim, because I feel that the skirt covers my cellulite and no one wants to see that anyway. Plus I think it's cute. I do show off my tatas, so I don't think anyone would think I'm a fundie.

And the praying out of no where? Weird Weird Weird.

Thank you, sweet baby Jesus, for Land's End swimwear. Yeah, you'll drop $70 on a suit but they make you look good and they last forever. I still have and use the suit that I bought 7 years ago for our honeymoon. My current suit for our toddler's swim lessons is 3.5 years old and has a halter tankini top with control panel in the tummy plus a swim skirt bottom. It hides the most unfortunate aspects of my figure and accentuates the few positives.

I swear a lap suit for swimming laps, of course - but for recreational swimming, Land's End cannot be beat.

[kb2]

I've heard parents with young kids sometimes feel isolated, especially in the early years when they're taking care of infants, but most people only go through a few "early years," and then all their children are above toddler-age and it's a lot easier to get out of the house. I can't imagine >11 years of infant care would leave you socially intact, especially when your partner believes that it's his long-suffering duty to leave the house while you stay home.

[notacleverpony]

That sound horribly awkward! Hope she doesn't bother you again. Thankfully, I've never had a similar encounter, but I always bring my fundie repellant to the beach:

http://www.pinupgirlclothing.com/cherry ... piece.html

Keeps me cool and fundie-free! They're too busy silently judging me from the safety of their buses to ever get close enough. *trollface*

[SunnyAndrsn]

I wonder if she was desarately lonely and you were the first female adult she had talked to in weeks?

This was my first thought as well. She's desperate for a friend, poor thing. Didn't know how to make one, but still I feel kind of sorry for her.

[gardenvarietycitizen]

I was just looking at the BuckHale vacation blog (42 days of an interesting around the US trip, with lots of pics) and they all swim in regular clothes. Not only that, but they won't swim if anyone else is swimming (presumably they don't want their kids to see people in modern swimwear) so when they stopped at some hot springs, the parents decreed that if they wanted to swim, it would have to be in the middle of the night - so they swam at 1:30 AM. Earlier in the trip they were thrilled to stop at a motel with a pool (with 24 kids, they usually camp) but again, Dad had to search around for a place that had a pool that no one was swimming in or likely to. And there's pics, they (boys too) are all swimming in regular full on clothing.

As I kid I always wore one piece suits with the little skirt, I still like those suits. I also like the suits that are a shorts set, so they don't look like bathing suits. But all of that stuff is made from special fast-drying material. I can't imagine voluntarily swimming in work pants, y'know? Or long prairie dresses. At least the various "modest swimsuits" (some of the Muslim-aimed ones actually look kinda interesting) are made out of that special quick-dry stuff.

As it was, this family posted about stopping at a laundromat and having tons of wet clothes to wash from stopping at the hot springs. Just imagine how heavy that must have been, too.

[Lostie]

This was my first thought as well. She's desperate for a friend, poor thing. Didn't know how to make one, but still I feel kind of sorry for her.

I recommend she read Stu the Cockatoo is new at the Zoo. Or, alternatively, she could use this:

It might be too worldly for her though.

[Minerva]

last week i was casually enjoying the hot humid day with my children at the beach. Than to my suprise i noticed a family 11 kids jumping in the water and swimming with clothes on....they had children around my kids age (2/3yrsold) so naturally they started playing together. The mother approached me and started asking me a ton of questions (which i was very weirded out by) than she got down to it....she asked, "are you a stay at home mother?" I said yes and this woman GRABBED my hands and started sobbing and praying for me. She was saying things like father protect this woman and let her feel the benefits of being a stay at home mother and helpmeet....she said their are no oher women like me anymore. I honestly did not know what to say....i didnt even know her name...than she asked if I homeschooled or plan on it and i said NO. she than tried to talk me into how much better it is and blah blah blah....seriously i just grabbed the kids and got into the car. I felt so disgusted by her. She was out of line grabbing me like that and pushing her beliefs upon me. Can I not go anywhere anymore lol????

I'd stay and take off my top. Then again, my teeny swimsuit would probably have kept them at bay in the first place.