Male Views on Courtship/Purity/Modesty

[CorruptionInc.]

I think it was, "the woman is the neck."

;)

But I do think that is very much representative of Jim Bob and Michelle's relationship.

Toula's mum also ends the quote with: "and the neck can turn the head any way she wants."

[No Cure for Stupid]

This is not only sad, but interesting. We know that sexuality is something you're born with, but can the degree of oppression that fundy kids live with actually shape their future sexuality by teaching them so deeply that something is so wrong that it chances their psyches on a subconscious level? That boy's upbringing was so strict that his forming was STRONGLY affected from probably infancy, versus other fundies who hear it's wrong, but then focus on babies and other stuff, and then react to someone being gay. Most of us, and I think most fundies, are told one way or another, but it's not the absolute main focus for all of us or all fundies.

Can the extreme strength of focus on sexuality or sex from so early in life actually affect sexuality? We'd usually call a boy who is turned on my the male body gay or bi, but that boy's explanation is something else. He articulated how he came to be attracted to men by the focus being on never, ever thinking about women to the point that he became averted to them. He could be confused, or it could run so deep in him now that he will never be able to find women attractive and only men, presuming he would have been straight otherwise. There are a lot of variables that make for more questions, but it's food for thought. I really wish people would just let their kids be and stop telling them that natural thoughts and natural desires are wrong one way of the other.

Sexuality isn't just black and white; it isn't just nature versus nurture. Yes, there can be a genetic component in homosexuality, but also life experiences can alter people's sexuality as well. Sexuality is a much-broader spectrum than most people take into account. Some people may be born homosexual or heterosexual, but others can also be affected by their environment.

Now, this isn't saying that conversion therapy works or that being around homosexuals makes someone a homosexual. It's just saying that there is a lot more to sexuality than just genetics.

[CorruptionInc.]

Sexuality isn't just black and white; it isn't just nature versus nurture. Yes, there can be a genetic component in homosexuality, but also life experiences can alter people's sexuality as well. Sexuality is a much-broader spectrum than most people take into account. Some people may be born homosexual or heterosexual, but others can also be affected by their environment.

Now, this isn't saying that conversion therapy works or that being around homosexuals makes someone a homosexual. It's just saying that there is a lot more to sexuality than just genetics.

I think there is definitely a genetic predisposition to sexuality; however nature vs. nurture is also around. There is a long way to go with science before anyone can actually say exactly what determines homosexuality.

[1st wiccan fundie]

Asking your children to reveal their impure thoughts to you is disgusting and spiritual abuse imo. The entire process, from explaining what is impure in their definition, focusing on it and therefore by it introduction to it you have inappropriately damaged them with information that is not acceptable for their age, to the shame and unhealthy, misdirection on the subject that will cause much psychological upset.

[CorruptionInc.]

Asking your children to reveal their impure thoughts to you is disgusting and spiritual abuse imo. The entire process, from explaining what is impure in their definition, focusing on it and therefore by it introduction to it you have inappropriately damaged them with information that is not acceptable for their age, to the shame and unhealthy, misdirection on the subject that will cause much psychological upset.

YES! This is so true! If your kids want to talk about it with you, they will and if they don't, then don't make them!

[BrownieMomma]

Asking your children to reveal their impure thoughts to you is disgusting and spiritual abuse imo. The entire process, from explaining what is impure in their definition, focusing on it and therefore by it introduction to it you have inappropriately damaged them with information that is not acceptable for their age, to the shame and unhealthy, misdirection on the subject that will cause much psychological upset.

How does one go about this?

Junior, have you had any impure thoughts? Tell me now.

I mean, how awkward. Weird. I agree, that seems far more damaging than any explanation which might be beneficial.

I just cannot imagine asking my kids about their impure thoughts, and I can't imagine being a kid and having that kind of conversation with a parent.