Blog: Courtship is Deceiving

[mrs]

I have recently read a series of blog post about a bloggers personal experience with courtship. She has begun writing about how courtship is deceiving and the sadness that she has endured as a result. I wanted to share the posts here.

She writes:

Most of all, though, I believed that courtship would keep me safe. That it would protect me from a broken heart. That if I “courted†instead of dated, I would arrive at my wedding day with a beautiful story, a story that I would be proud and happy to tell to my children and grandchildren.

Instead, I have a story I struggle to tell anyone. A story I couldn’t put on our beautiful wedding website. A story only my best friends know.

The caustic, confusing anger continues to burn, and I reach up to smear away the tears smudging my cheeks. “Jesus, I’m angry,†I pray aloud. “I’m angry and sad and hurting…â€

She also warns:

Courtship did not keep my heart from being broken–it was the instrument for doing so. I am scarred, and I am still hurting. And even though my husband and I are married, and happy, and thankful to God for that fact, we are still processing the emotional trauma of everything that happened during that year of courtship. We may never be able to tell our story, but we can give a warning to those who will listen.

If you are reading this, don’t be deceived. Courtship is a lot messier than many people make it out to be. It won’t protect you from emotional harm and long-term damage. It has unique challenges and hardships of its own.

I encourage you to check out her blog. Her story is interesting. I don’t agree with everything she writes but it I do think she is honest about the hardships she has faced.

Part One: thisfieldofvision.com/deceived/

Part Two: thisfieldofvision.com/deceived-part-2/#comments

[OnceModestTwiceShy]

I'm really curious to read what actually happened during the courtship...she talks a lot about her anger and hurt and how courtship is a lie, but she doesn't really go into detail. It seems like it's still a very raw subject for her. I do like her other articles - it appears, at least based on her writing, that her education was quite good for a fundie.

[mrs]

I agree OnceModestTwiceShy, she says in her bio she went to Patrick Henry College. And now lives in the DC area.( So perhaps, there is hope Josh Duggar will become more progressive when he moves to DC).

The blogger is also taking on Michael Pearl: thisfieldofvision.com/michael-pearl-and-responding-to-attention-seekers/#comments