Lori Alexander On Preschool

[lilwriter85]

If anything, my kids got MORE out of being at preschool.

There is a limit to what one parent like me can do with a preschooler, esp. when there is a baby at home as well. I suck at arts & crafts, for example, and a don't have as much energy as a class full of kids.

Preschool and home are different. At preschool, the kids had friends, learned to follow routines (and were probably getting more "training" than I would have provided), learned songs, had a chance to play outdoors and get plenty of exercise, did early learning, worked on both fine and gross motor skills, etc. Home was different - that was their place to cuddle and unwind. In some ways, I could be the cuddly, laid-back parent because I didn't have to be fully responsible for teaching all of the other skills, routines, socialization, etc.

I'm laughing a bit at the "language and stories you don't want them to hear" line. Well, it depends on which preschool you use, doesn't it? We used one that had strict policy of being anti-sexist, non-authoritarian, anti-racist and gay positive, and the language and stories reflected that. We also used some religious preschools, and parents' only concern was that it may be TOO religious. Horror of horrors, the kids would come home singing songs about giving charity. [i had cultural whiplash, but my daughter just went with the flow.]

I agree with you it depends on the types of preschools. I don't have kids yet, but I would fear certain religious preschools. A friend of mine is planning to put her son in a Episcopal preschool that is fairly liberal and has similar policies.

[lilwriter85]

But it's nothing she did. Others backed out of a relationship with her because there was something wrong with them. :roll:

I agree, she totally blames them. I hope the couple who did back away told other couples at the church about L&K.

[AnywhereButHere]

Yup, I work and had to put my son in daycare/pre-school so I could buy "stuff". I admit it, I'm a horrible parent. It wasn't anything important really, just, you know, groceries, clothes, health insurance, mortgage, all the "stuff" that Lori thinks we mere women can't be responsible for. :roll: According to her, I guess I could've trained up my child from a cardboard box under the freeway better than from my nice, little, comfortable house, but we'll never know now will we since I turned my back on God's will... :P

Yeah, she blames the couples who walk away from her teachings as being the wrong ones who are unable to hear or accept Lori's truth.

[Jana814]

Man this woman is a wack job.

[AuntCloud]

If anything, my kids got MORE out of being at preschool.

There is a limit to what one parent like me can do with a preschooler, esp. when there is a baby at home as well. I suck at arts & crafts, for example, and a don't have as much energy as a class full of kids.

Preschool and home are different. At preschool, the kids had friends, learned to follow routines (and were probably getting more "training" than I would have provided), learned songs, had a chance to play outdoors and get plenty of exercise, did early learning, worked on both fine and gross motor skills, etc. Home was different - that was their place to cuddle and unwind. In some ways, I could be the cuddly, laid-back parent because I didn't have to be fully responsible for teaching all of the other skills, routines, socialization, etc.

I'm laughing a bit at the "language and stories you don't want them to hear" line. Well, it depends on which preschool you use, doesn't it? We used one that had strict policy of being anti-sexist, non-authoritarian, anti-racist and gay positive, and the language and stories reflected that. We also used some religious preschools, and parents' only concern was that it may be TOO religious. Horror of horrors, the kids would come home singing songs about giving charity. [i had cultural whiplash, but my daughter just went with the flow.]

You're using logic again. Remember, it's Lori you're up against. Also remember: her kids enjoyed it, therefore it must have been wrong for them to be there.

[lilah]

I work for an elementary school that has a preschool program and I've seen some incredible developments in my 3 and 4 year old students. There was this one little girl who was a preemie. She would always come up to the library and cry or sit in a corner and not want to participate. She never talked.

Yesterday she walked over to me and started talking about one of the books she really liked. She "read" it to me (looked at the pictures and told me the story based on memory) and it was so awesome. I think she said more to me in one class than she had talked to me all year. It was a treasured moment.

[dawbs]

"They are being influenced by their peers which usually are not raised the way you are raising your children"

Uhhh...good?

Assume I'm doing an awesome job parenting (Ok, this month, I'm not doing awesome. But I'm doing adequate. Next month, I'll hope to be awesome. Regardless, overall, my kid is happy, well adjusted, healthy, and learning stuff)...

That doesn't mean that 1-it's the right way or 2-it's the only way.

One of the wonderful things abuot my kid being exposed to other people is that sometimes they find ways to work with her that I don't. They teach her in ways that I don't. Having exposure to mom's way of teaching letters AND grandpa's way of teaching letters = more ways for her to learn letters = better education.

Having exposure to mom's rules AND to Nanna's rules = learning flexibility. And sometimes nanna has tools I have missed--l generally don't do time-outs with her because they're not effective but I'm learning that NANA'S versions of time-outs ARE effective. ta-da, I have a new way of 'training' *shudder* m kid better.

One of the wonderful things about my kid being exposed to other people is taht she learns that there is awesome that exists outside of her otherwise small circle. She learns that other kids and families are awesome, even if our family is different.

[OkToBeTakei]

I just wish she would just .. I dunno take up golf in her bloody dotage instead of spouting off her ridiculous opinions on just about anything.

Who knows with any luck somebody may forget to shout 'fore.' Put her and everybody else who reads her abuse out of their misery.

[JMarie]

Children need continual training and guidance, especially when they are very young. This idea that the government is now going to pay for childcare is ridiculous. Why are they going to do that? So the government can raise our babies instead of us? So mothers can leave their homes and work for money to buy stuff? It makes no sense to me.

____________________________________

Preschool isn't the same thing as childcare, Lori.

[infooverload]

I am assuming Lori went to public schools. I guess the evil govt did a bad job of training her to be a decent human being. ;)

[Closed Womb]

She did admit once on the blog that a couple backed away from them. I suspect other couples have ditched them, but Lori will never admit the real number.

lorialexander.blogspot.com/2012/09/brutish-behavior.html

Okay, first, I seriously doubt that anyone who FOLLOWS Lori's advice could have a great marriage. Probably the best thing these women/couples ever did for their marriage was realize the crazy when the they saw it.

Second, Lori doesn't really like to be corrected, except by Ken. How would she react to a normal, calm explanation of honest equality between spouses and how they get it wrong? Probably not with a, "Gosh, thank you!"

Fundies: Removing the dust in their neighbor's eye while ignoring the plank in their own since time immemorial.

[AuntCloud]

I work for an elementary school that has a preschool program and I've seen some incredible developments in my 3 and 4 year old students. There was this one little girl who was a preemie. She would always come up to the library and cry or sit in a corner and not want to participate. She never talked.

Yesterday she walked over to me and started talking about one of the books she really liked. She "read" it to me (looked at the pictures and told me the story based on memory) and it was so awesome. I think she said more to me in one class than she had talked to me all year. It was a treasured moment.

Preschool turned my shy, almost-non-verbal preemie into a happy, thriving kindergartener. Sounds like you're a great teacher!

Again, you keep mentioning how preschool makes children, especially girls, happy and educated. Now answer this: how does that contribute to the fundie cause?

[wild little fox]

She makes me want to scream!

Isolation WILL keep your children from learning social norms. I can only speak about the effect of isolation on my own life, but I have a very hard time socially holding a conversation and interacting with others. Of course working with the public has helped some and my continued isolation as an adult has hindered me more. It all contributes to my social anxiety and keeps me from having a life.

Despite what fundies think children NEED social interaction with people of all ages and ALSO with people their own age. I think this is part of why fundies, especially the men, are so weird and inappropriate. They are either socially inept to begin with or have been isolated.

Can you imagine conversation at the water cooler with one of the Arnt boys? Granted they are an extreme exception, but still!

[GeoBQn]

Pam · 6 hours ago

There are wonderful preschools around, at least in my area. My nephew attended preschool through his church. He learned so much, including many Bible stories! Plus, he was able to socialize with children his own age, which definitely helps a child's development. He is now at the top of his class in second grade, reading well above grade level. He also attends Sunday School, and loves reading his Bible. Yes, parents need to be "choosy" about where they send their children to school, but not all preschools, Christian schools and public schools are bad.

Lori Alexander · 4 hours ago

One must be extremely careful today who you leave your children with. Children as young as preschool age are being molested and a lot of time by relatives. I believe this is a huge reason why God wants mothers to be keepers at home...to protect their childre.

I'm surprised Lori didn't mention the (debunked) Satanist preschool scare. And now even relatives aren't good enough to watch over children, though it is true that most children are molested by someone they have a close connection to. That's another reason why preschool is useful--it's always helpful to have another set of adults to notice things that parents might not have picked up on, from health problems to abuse.

[Jinger Jar]

I'm surprised Lori didn't mention the (debunked) Satanist preschool scare. And now even relatives aren't good enough to watch over children, though it is true that most children are molested by someone they have a close connection to. That's another reason why preschool is useful--it's always helpful to have another set of adults to notice things that parents might not have picked up on, from health problems to abuse.

Another fail for Lori. Children are most likely to be abused in their own homes.

http://www.baltimorecountymd.gov/agenci ... abuse.html

I swear this women just makes stuff up to suit her purposes.

[LostSamurai]

As soon as I saw this, I knew it to be:

"BLAH BLAH BLAH KEEP YOUR KIDS AT HOME BECAUSE ITS GODLY. DAY CARE CENTERS ARE EBIL AND FULL OF GODLESS HEATHENS. BLAH BLAH BLAH TRAINING'

[Full enough quiver]

What!? Lori is against preschool for children?! I'm shocked! Shocked, I tell you! What doesn't shock me at all is that her children enjoyed it. If she was my mother, I'd enjoy being away from her as much as possible. That being said, some children spend up to 10 hours a day in preschool, and I don't think that's good for them. I know sometimes it can't be helped, if mom has to work, she has to work. Maybe the family really needs the money, or mom is a single parent. Some ways to avoid that situation is to have longer, paid maternity (or paternity) leave, flexible scheduling or work from home options, living wages, more involved fathers, better child support enforcement, etc. all things I'm sure fundies like Lori would support, since it's so much better for kids to have a sahm. Oh yeah, they only care about children before their born. I forgot.

[sugarloaf]

This woman really is a massive hypocrite, isn't she?

MY children got the benefit of preschool and enjoyed it very much. But it's far, far too bad for any of you to even remotely consider.

[OkToBeTakei]

I totally agree with Lori.

Those 3 days a week, those 2 hours and 15 minutes when my child was away from me when I could not 'train' her. Those lost hours when at the tender age of 3 and a half. I will never get them back. I will turn to Lori when I reach her wise old age to be at one with the guilt she expresses. How can I have been so neglectful, so naive, so selfish as to think I was in actual fact doing the right thing.

The potato printing. God forgive me.

Those tri-cycles in the spring sun pretending they were doing their cycling proficiency. God forgive me.

All those wee pictures so proudly brought home. God forgive me.

Her best friend still. 7 years later from a different school and a different religion. God forgive me.

For learning to be sociable in a gentle environment. God forgive me.

For crayons, duplo, picnics, wendy houses, craft, ABC's, silly songs, nursery rhymes, story time, trips to the beach, sports day. God forgive me.

For holding hands with friends, learning to take a turn, for having a special hat on your birthday and being sang to. God forgive me.

For wanting to go back to show the nursery teacher how a big girl looks in a big girl school uniform and bringing some flowers. God forgive me.

I am a total failure as a Mother.

Uh huh.

[VooDooChild]

:pray: Dear God,

I pray that you would lay it on the heart of Lori's headship that he must tell her to shut down her blog and stop her hateful, ignorant diatribe, and that the headship demand obedience on the matter. :pray:

Amen.

[AuntCloud]

I totally agree with Lori.

Those 3 days a week, those 2 hours and 15 minutes when my child was away from me when I could not 'train' her. Those lost hours when at the tender age of 3 and a half. I will never get them back. I will turn to Lori when I reach her wise old age to be at one with the guilt she expresses. How can I have been so neglectful, so naive, so selfish as to think I was in actual fact doing the right thing.

The potato printing. God forgive me.

Those tri-cycles in the spring sun pretending they were doing their cycling proficiency. God forgive me.

All those wee pictures so proudly brought home. God forgive me.

Her best friend still. 7 years later from a different school and a different religion. God forgive me.

For learning to be sociable in a gentle environment. God forgive me.

For crayons, duplo, picnics, wendy houses, craft, ABC's, silly songs, nursery rhymes, story time, trips to the beach, sports day. God forgive me.

For holding hands with friends, learning to take a turn, for having a special hat on your birthday and being sang to. God forgive me.

For wanting to go back to show the nursery teacher how a big girl looks in a big girl school uniform and bringing some flowers. God forgive me.

I am a total failure as a Mother.

Uh huh.

Some of my kids' teachers were so, so wonderful I wish I could be held back a few grades and go back there.

However: we had co-ed potty training. I distinctly remember a bathroom with two tiny toilets and there were definitely other three-year-olds there, defrauding my precious snowflake.

[SquirrelySquirrel]

I guess I'm one of the lone parents here who did not put my child in preschool. But I was very fortunate to be part of an awesome play group that was led by a trained Montessori educator who was staying home with her child. We did a homeschool/unschool type of thing and it worked out just fine. She got plenty of interaction from the group and being around friends and family (I was a frequent go-to babysitter for those who needed me, and still am since I went from SAHM to WAHM) quite a bit as well, and we learned a lot from our leader. Socialization was never a problem, as the hubs and I are very social people.

But I absolutely have nothing against traditional preschool. I think it's great for most kids, and the preschool teachers I am acquainted with are very devoted and really love their kids. There are only a few in my area that are not in churches and the waiting lists are long, and the prices are kind of steep, unless you qualify for the Headstart program, which we did not. And there is absolutely no way on earth I could drop off my kid at a church every day, even if they were more on the liberal side.

Anyhoo, she's in her second year at the evil public school and I wouldn't have it any other way.

[OkToBeTakei]

I guess I'm one of the lone parents here who did not put my child in preschool. But I was very fortunate to be part of an awesome play group that was led by a trained Montessori educator who was staying home with her child. We did a homeschool/unschool type of thing and it worked out just fine. She got plenty of interaction from the group and being around friends and family (I was a frequent go-to babysitter for those who needed me, and still am since I went from SAHM to WAHM) quite a bit as well, and we learned a lot from our leader. Socialization was never a problem, as the hubs and I are very social people.

But I absolutely have nothing against traditional preschool. I think it's great for most kids, and the preschool teachers I am acquainted with are very devoted and really love their kids. There are only a few in my area that are not in churches and the waiting lists are long, and the prices are kind of steep, unless you qualify for the Headstart program, which we did not. And there is absolutely no way on earth I could drop off my kid at a church every day, even if they were more on the liberal side.

Anyhoo, she's in her second year at the evil public school and I wouldn't have it any other way.

Sounds like a good set-up. To clarify my point. Pre-school here is free. It is free for 2 years prior to evil real school. Anti-pre and then pre-school. It is run by LEA (Local education authority) and is non-denominational. Some schools have attached pre-school eg. Catholic. But I am not aware of 'Church' pre-school. There is voluntary Mother and toddler groups. But I am not sure if these are religion based or just the fact a church hall is available. Obviously there is also private nursery and pre-schools for parents who work full time. From my experience these nurseries used to bring their kids to the evil govt pre-school for their 2 hour session as generally it is more education focussed and is generally tied in to the school you wish your child to attend.

Fascinating the differences we all have.

[ADoyle90815]

My niece is in preschool, and it does happen to be a church school, since the school that was connected with the evil public school had a waiting list that parents get on when they're still in the hospital, and the cost is steep unless the family qualifies for Head Start. My niece is doing great at that school, which she attends 3 days a week, but in the fall, she'll be going to the evil public school for kindergarten as she's going to be 5 next month.

[slickcat79]

I'm surprised Lori didn't mention the (debunked) Satanist preschool scare. And now even relatives aren't good enough to watch over children, though it is true that most children are molested by someone they have a close connection to. That's another reason why preschool is useful--it's always helpful to have another set of adults to notice things that parents might not have picked up on, from health problems to abuse.

Wait...Lori's argument against sending your kids to preschool is that they are liable to be molested BY RELATIVES? What does that have to do with preschool? :?