Lori Alexander: Don't Make Your Husband Into a Woman

[lilwriter85]

lorialexander.blogspot.com/2012/08/admiring-his-masculinity.html

Instead of trying to get your husband to talk more, you will understand that he has used up his 10,000 words for the day and you still have 20,000 words left, so you will call your girlfriend.

Instead of turning him down for sex again, you will understand that he has ten times the testosterone that you have and will be happy to meet that need for him.

Instead of getting angry with him when he yells at the referee, you will smile and think he is just being a competitive man.

You will admire his masculine traits for now on instead of trying to make him into a woman.

You will understand when he doesn't notice your haircut or buy you flowers, but softly ask him if he likes your hair.

Again, Lori is pushing her "never refuse sex" motto.

[keen23]

When he yells at the referee in the privacy of your home, ignore it. When he does it in public, elbow him in the ribs, tell him he's being an asshole, and then pretend you don't know him.

[kunoichi66]

When he yells at the referee in the privacy of your home, ignore it. When he does it in public, elbow him in the ribs, tell him he's being an asshole, and then pretend you don't know him.

Words to live by.

[StarrieEyedKat]

When he yells at the referee in the privacy of your home, ignore it. When he does it in public, elbow him in the ribs, tell him he's being an asshole, and then pretend you don't know him.

I'm so glad I'm not the only one...

[galaxygirl]

Well, shit. I must be doing everything wrong. I'm the one that yells at referees. I'm the one with the higher sex drive. He will notice my haircut, or co-workers getting one :lol:

[Terrie]

Ah, yes, "Encourage your husband to be a walking, (sometimes) talking stereotype." One of my best friends is a guy, and we debate endlessly. We can use more than 10,000 words in a single conversation.

[lilwriter85]

My boyfriend and I both yell at refs when huge BS calls are made or when obvious things aren't called by the refs. I have been to sporting events where people yell at refs most of the time and that is annoying.

[YPestis]

I really don't understand why fundies put such stock in gender stereotypes. My best friend in college was a guy who was more talky than anyone I know. I've known quite a few male friends who talk get emotional, and are certainly more emotionally open than me. Fundies seem to think if a man deviates from those manly stereotypes, then it...what? It makes them more more open to communication with their wives? Learn to appreciate their wive's attempt to look pretty? Learn to not be an ass? I guess the ideal fundie man is one who grunts his way through the house, ignores his wife, and belittles strangers in public. Lovely.

[linnea27]

Interesting. By expecting your husband to meet your needs and talk with you when you have 20,000 words left (where the hell is that from, by the way?) you are turning him into a woman. By that logic, when he expects you to meet his needs and have sex and meet his testosterone levels, isn't he turning you into a man?

Also? Is being a "competitive man" in the bible? I would think that's something Jesus would frown upon.

[Guest Anonymous]

If all of these dumb gender stereotypes were grounded in biology, then surely a wife could do and say whatever she wanted without fear of making her husband 'into a woman'.

[Terrie]

If all of these dumb gender stereotypes were grounded in biology, then surely a wife could do and say whatever she wanted without fear of making her husband 'into a woman'.

The only way I can think of to make your husband into a woman is to dope him with estrogen. And even then, it depends on how you define "woman".

[Artemis]

Memo to self, must inform much-loved headship that no matter how interesting the geology, the palaeontology, the biology, the astronomy, the zoology or whatever other -ology he is currently enthusing about is, he is not allowed more than five thousand words to talk about it, or Lori will be on his case. Five thousand? Because he'll have used up at least the other five thousand discussing his day at work, the people he met, the current politics and state of the nation, and the prevailing weather, also known as meteorology.

I'm the one who will produce at maximum a couple of thousand words during the day. (Yes, I know I write lots. I just don't talk lots.) Mostly because he is more interesting to listen to than I am, (teachers talk about teaching a lot :( ) and I enjoy his conversation.

As for the rest of it - we watch cycling together and neither of us yell.

The sex is my business, not yours, Lori, dear, but I can assure you we don't need your advice

He always notices what I wear. Sigh. And what other people wear. And what they are doing. And can provide me with a full analysis. Whatever their gender. (He's just a scientist, OK? He likes observing, it's who he is and what he does.)

He buys me flowers lots . . . . and cries at emotional music, and puts up with my inability to be emotional, and helps me out and provides a shoulder when needed. He's also very, very masculine and straight. So straight that when we used to go out with one of our gay friends (before he died of AIDS, bless him) the two of them used to have fun camping it up for outraged passers-by. Said friend told me he didn't know many men who were secure enough in their own identity to do that. Dougie would have wet himself in that situation.

So thanks, Lori, but I'll take the love of my life and my best friend over your stupid stereotype any time.

[Burris]

My husband is a man – a man who lives with constant pain (including, but not limited to, chronic kidney stones and arthritis in every joint) and yet he still works every day; a man who doesn't quit anything even quitting is easiest. He has a strong ethic that doesn't bend.

He's also not a self-absorbed asshole and nor does he restrict his daily word-count to conform to a myth. (He's the undisputed and much-liked social butterfly of our pair, to the point where we can go anywhere - including across province - and there will invariably be someone around who recognizes him and wants to strike up a conversation. It's actually quite remarkable.)

The fact Lori can't tell the difference between normal man-behavior - e.g., bitching about bad calls on a televised sports match, etc. - and shear dickery suggests she's never met a good man.

I'd feel bad for her, but she tries to condemn everyone else to the same shitty life she has in an effort to justify what sounds an awful lot like her husband's moral failings.

[Maggie Mae]

Why must she center align every post?

She is infuriating. She fails to recognize that there are differences in people, regardless of gender or sex. I yell at the refs just as much as the men folk. I have a higher sex drive. I am a woman, and I don't think that anyone would ever mistake me for a man, unless I was purposely trying to look like a man. Even then, I still have a vagina and fairly large breasts. I don't do the nice "thinking of you" things anymore than he does.

[lilwriter85]

Why must she center align every post?

She is infuriating. She fails to recognize that there are differences in people, regardless of gender or sex. I yell at the refs just as much as the men folk. I have a higher sex drive. I am a woman, and I don't think that anyone would ever mistake me for a man, unless I was purposely trying to look like a man. Even then, I still have a vagina and fairly large breasts. I don't do the nice "thinking of you" things anymore than he does.

I also wonder about the center align thing too. My guess is that Lori thinks it makes her blog look nice, pretty, and inspirational. I agree she is infuriating, and it is extremely annoying that she can't realize or understand differences in people. One of these days, her attitudes and beliefs about gender roles is going bite her in the ass. I know plenty of men that would find that blog posting ridiculous.

[emmiedahl]

Not that science has ever stopped a fundie from thinking something dumb, but...

Men actually talk more than women, just in different situations. http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/20 ... 171518.htm

Women can have higher sex drives at certain points in their life span. Men's sex drives do not fluctuate as much, but that does not mean they are consistently higher. Testosterone is not the only chemical that affects libido. http://www.time.com/time/magazine/artic ... 22,00.html

Last time I checked, yelling at people for no good reason and failing to notice obvious changes are not biologically male characteristics. If men really are inobservant buffoons who cannot control their temper, maybe fundies should stop letting them call all of the shots.

My husband's penis has not fallen off yet, so I doubt my expectation that he act in a socially acceptable manner has affected his masculinity.

[lilwriter85]

From the comments section

Nicole · 10 hours ago

I absolutely LOVE the 'manly-ness' of my hubby. It makes me feel very protected and comfortable. I used to think that I was attracted to 'cocky' guys, but I guess I just like a man that acts like a man. Even more so now that I have learned what it's like to act like a woman and not compete with my hubby......we are different, and that's how we're supposed to be.

No, Nicole you are just attracted to cocky guys.

ETA: I wonder if Lori will comments from men who disagree with her to be posted. When she did with the anti stay-at-home dad posting, she allowed a few comments from men that either disagreed with her or were stay-at-home dads.

[gardenvarietycitizen]

If all of these dumb gender stereotypes were grounded in biology, then surely a wife could do and say whatever she wanted without fear of making her husband 'into a woman'.

Exactly. The entire thing is just a load.

The same can be said for all the stupid gendering of kids they insist on - if the differences were truly innate, you could let everyone just do what they want and they'd all magically segregate into little gender boxes. But it's the fact that they DON'T segregate that way (because it's not innate) that requires all the heavy-handed gender policing.

If differences are truly innate there's no need for policing. They kill their own argument.

[Want More Babies]

Instead of trying to make your husband become more sensitive, you will understand that he is not a woman and God has created him to go out and fight for survival.

Instead of trying to get your husband to talk more, you will understand that he has used up his 10,000 words for the day and you still have 20,000 words left, so you will call your girlfriend.

Instead of turning him down for sex again, you will understand that he has ten times the testosterone that you have and will be happy to meet that need for him.

Instead of getting angry with him when he yells at the referee, you will smile and think he is just being a competitive man.

You will admire his masculine traits for now on instead of trying to make him into a woman.

You will understand when he doesn't notice your haircut or buy you flowers, but softly ask him if he likes your hair.

Oh Lori, you reveal so much here without even realizing it. Ken must be one of the biggest asses I have ever heard of.

Here is my guess: behind closes doors Ken treats Lori like crap and for whatever reason, she refuses to stand up to him. She is miserable and well, misery loves company.

My husband does not like sports, it is me that is yelling at the referee through the TV or not noticing that he got his hair cut. :) I trim off an inch and he notices. He also buys me flowers on a regular basis. He likes to watch chick flicks and I don't. We talk throughout the day and even manage to talk for a hour or two when he gets home at night. As for sex, we are just fine in that department, thank you for your concern though Lori. :roll:

Did I mention he also will do the dishes, clean the kitchen, help with laundry, and go shopping with me too? :)

Sorry Lori, but you are married to an arse. I will take my marriage over yours any day of the week.

[luckystone]

Aww doesn't notice your haircut or buy your flowers? I feel sorry for this woman. She's obviously in a very unhappy relationship and thinks they are all like that. And if men do do those things, that means they are women? Interesting way of justifying your own poor relationship.

I wish people would stop pretending sex drive is a direct result of how much testosterone someone has. It's not.

[slickcat79]

Hmm. Sounds like a variation on Kelly's "Don't Make Your Son Into a Woman":

Men are rare. Real men allowed to be who God made them. And like almost everything in the universe, we, WOMEN, hold the power to shape and change. We are the ones who have so craftily disassembled the real men. And only we can help build them back and raise a new generation of them.

I want to love my boys, but let them be boys.

Wow, for being submissive doormats, we women sure do have a lot of power :roll:

generationcedar.com/main/2012/04/raising-men-in-a-man-hating-world.html

[doggie]

giving anyone sex whenever they desire it is like giving into a spoiled child every time they want something. it will turn them into a monster that will only care about their own satisfaction. This whole submission thing really will only not work or it will create monsters. It can't do nothing else really. the whole The man will do his best to be the man of the house and please the wife to get praise crap is just that.

[lilwriter85]

Lori's post from yesterday is about her saying that husbands only treat their wives special when they aren't nagging and when the women start pleasing them. This woman is an idiot and I can't stand how she tries to generalize gender roles and how men and women are supposed to act. News flash Lori, not all couples are how you think they should be. It is also a bit scary that Lori and Ken mentored the couple in the picture included with that posting.

lorialexander.blogspot.com/2012/08/are-men-are-idiots.html

From my experience, when wives start loving and pleasing their husbands, the husbands want to treat their wives special. They want to start dating them again because they have fun with them and enjoy being with them. When a wife nags and complains, a husband doesn't desire to date his wife. Who wants to date a nag?

[Anxious Girl]

lorialexander.blogspot.com/2012/08/admiring-his-masculinity.html

Again, Lori is pushing her "never refuse sex" motto.

Umm, where did she get these statistics from? The University of the Dining Room Table?

Of course, since Lori says it, it must be true for ALL couples!!!!!1one11eleventy1!1

I didn't know that women could turn men into women just by using their emotions! I wonder where her scientifically-aproved peer review is? :lol:

[Daenerys]

Whatever I might say or do to my husband, it isn't going to make him grow a vagina.