Let there be music-NOT

[elliha]

On 2017-10-11 at 11:04 PM, allthegoodnamesrgone said:

Honestly I don't think we've seen JB & M do ANYTHING with any of the kids since M lost Jubilee. She was fading more and more after each kid but completely shut down after she miscarried Jubilee. I don't think she was allowed to properly grieve for that baby, she was given a few days prior to her birth but seemed to jump right back into life after she was buried.  They haven't mentioned her once since her birth/death except that one time Jill tweeted or Instead something about it.   She was what 18/19 weeks along, I sadly know several women who miscarried that late or later and or had a still birth.  1 friend who had a still born at 40 wks 5 days (from medical malpractice no less) still talks about her and we acknowledge her every year in Sept on her birthday she would have been 14 this year. Michelle had to pack that grief away and keep sweet and available for JB. She didn't do a good job of it as she's mentally checked out and I do think she is heavily medicated to be that way, because she couldn't cope with losing her child and her fertility at pretty much the same time.

 

I agree with you about M not being allowed to grieve or even process her life as a mom of a million kids but I just want to add a little comment on grief. Going back to life "as usual" isn't necesssarily a sign of not grieving properly. Grief is very individual and doesn't really always happen in textbook ways. I went back to work the day after my mother died because that was all I could manage to do and not fall apart completely. Being able to act normal for a couple of hours around people who wasn't grieving and who had their own problems and lives helped me deal with my loss. I could be "me" as in the me that wasn't devasted for a couple hours so I had the chance of actually being able to process my thoughts the rest of the time. 

[Kittikatz]

I know next to nothing about music, or what makes a good or bad teacher, or the availability of either in tonitown. What I do know is that the Duggars were not always cash rich, particularly when they were starting out. Also, JimBoob and Moochelle have not exactly prioritized the well being or education of their children. We have also seen on the show how they like to hire qualified trades (for example the carpet layers at the house Jill moved into) and have their children watch/help out so they can 'learn' how it's done and can do it themselves the next time. I could totally see the Duggars finding a cut rate violin teacher through a church, then once the girls got to a certain point in learning, just having them teach the littles. 

[JDuggs]

On the Duggar Family Official Facebook page, there is a video clip from three years ago of Jordyn playing violin with a woman I don't recognize playing piano. 

[SapphireSlytherin]

10 hours ago, VVV said:

Professional orchestras all over the US have Suzuki alumni in their violin sections

I stand by my "rare" assertion. How many violin players are there, versus how many are actually good enough to play with a professional orchestra? Natural talent also plays a huge part. Same with anything where there are a limited number of chairs (how about those pianists???), or positions (pro baseball/hockey/football), etc.

 

[brusselsgriffon]

Just out of curiousity, why do we think Michelle is heavily medicated? I've seen that mentioned on a few threads now, and she does seem pretty "out of it," but God knows she wouldn't be allowed to take anything for her mental health. What would she be on? 

[elliha]

Aren't there certain medicines that can be prescribed for physical pain and for anxiety? That type of pill could be what she is using if the official cause is a bad back or pelvis which would be reasonable problems for a woman having given birth to that many kids.

[JDuggs]

I don't think Michelle is on any mood altering medication. I think she very consciously controls all of her emotions. She only wants to appear joyful, so if she's feeling anything else, she controls it and appears blank. Just my own theory.

[nastyhobbitses]

9 hours ago, elliha said:

I agree with you about M not being allowed to grieve or even process her life as a mom of a million kids but I just want to add a little comment on grief. Going back to life "as usual" isn't necesssarily a sign of not grieving properly. Grief is very individual and doesn't really always happen in textbook ways. I went back to work the day after my mother died because that was all I could manage to do and not fall apart completely. Being able to act normal for a couple of hours around people who wasn't grieving and who had their own problems and lives helped me deal with my loss. I could be "me" as in the me that wasn't devasted for a couple hours so I had the chance of actually being able to process my thoughts the rest of the time. 

When my grandfather died, the first thing I did was get some grocery shopping and financial stuff done. I just had to do normal adult things and be a normal person, because I was thousands of miles away and being a crying mess would be no use. I'm very much a "power through, grit your teeth, fall apart later" person. For better or for worse.

It took me until his memorial service a month and a half later to actually process everything. Then I cried a lot.

[Bad Wolf]

@nastyhobbitses there's no right way to grieve, or wrong way, either. We all have to find out own way through. Hugs to everyone 

[MamaJunebug]

13 hours ago, Cleopatra7 said:

It also seems like the Duggars are very lazy people and don’t want to work at anything to be good at it, 

By Jove, I think you’ve got it!

But I’m confused: 

Boob and Meech can hustle - and have hustled - to get backing for his legislative campaign, the TLC and subsequent contracts, and their assorted land purchases, leases and rentals and such. So why haven’t they taught this to their spawn? 

[Cleopatra7]

4 minutes ago, MamaJunebug said:

By Jove, I think you’ve got it!

But I’m confused: 

Boob and Meech can hustle - and have hustled - to get backing for his legislative campaign, the TLC and subsequent contracts, and their assorted land purchases, leases and rentals and such. So why haven’t they taught this to their spawn? 

Because if JB just hands out houses and jobs in the various family enterprises, it keeps his kids and their respective spouses under his control into adulthood and makes them less likely to question their upbringing and beliefs. If a dysfunctional belief system appears to be working for you, you are probably not going to recognize that it is dysfunctional.

[MadameOvary]

They could have the best teachers, but you can only go so far without sufficient practice. They have a big house and other buildings, but also the place is full of people. I can easily see how the overall chaos makes it hard to find the space to do it, even if you were generally keen. I am one of three, and we all wanted to practice our instruments, but it was hard and involved endless compromises. If it's practically difficult and you happen to be unenthusiastic - well, it's not going to happen. Or perhaps you are into music, but cannot devote enough time to it, seeing as you are  running a household and in charge of your herd of younger siblings.

[freshlemonade]

I remember the family playing music for Flame (cringe-worthy), but did they ever play for Jeremy's family?  Aren't his mom and sister violinists?  I'm guessing if JinJer have kids, they will incorporate music into whatever type of schooling they choose.  

Also, do the younger Duggar kids learn to read music, or do they just memorize songs?   

We know that they are night owls.  So in the evenings, after it gets dark and they can't play outside.  What do they do?  They don't really seem like readers.  They don't watch tv.  Maybe they jam

[SapphireSlytherin]

Just now, freshlemonade said:

Aren't his mom and sister violinists?

They are. Exceptional, too.

[VVV]

3 hours ago, SapphireSlytherin said:

I stand by my "rare" assertion. How many violin players are there, versus how many are actually good enough to play with a professional orchestra? Natural talent also plays a huge part. Same with anything where there are a limited number of chairs (how about those pianists???), or positions (pro baseball/hockey/football), etc.

 

What you said was that Suzuki trained violinists are easy to spot, and I dare you to go to any professional orchestra and pick out which players started with Suzuki and which did not. You can't do it.

There are plenty of bad violinists coming out of every imaginable school of violin teaching.

[Bad Wolf]

@freshlemonade Duggars jammin. I love it.

[Rachel333]

There are some excellent violin teachers in the NWA area, but the Duggars didn't use them.

[Greendoor]

4 hours ago, JDuggs said:

I don't think Michelle is on any mood altering medication. I think she very consciously controls all of her emotions. She only wants to appear joyful, so if she's feeling anything else, she controls it and appears blank. Just my own theory.

I wonder a tad what happens after so many close spaced pregnancies.  I am not trying to be cruel so if I am off base, someone with knowledge please tell me.

"Baby-brain" is a common enough brief occurance when woman have a child - but we get out of it because we have lives.  Michelle has had all this hormonal stuff non-stop for so long, could she have permanant damamge?  A natural propecicity to look up like and adoring half-wit coupled with continual pregnacy can help but have an effect I would think.

[justoneoftwo]

19 minutes ago, Greendoor said:

 

"Baby-brain" is a common enough brief occurance when woman have a child - but we get out of it because we have lives.  Michelle has had all this hormonal stuff non-stop for so long, could she have permanant damamge?  A natural propecicity to look up like and adoring half-wit coupled with continual pregnacy can help but have an effect I would think.

I understand that Baby-brain is due to not getting enough sleep and having something new and huge take up focus.  Its not actually a medical thing.  It drives me crazy when people act like it is because it implies that mothers can't function or be smart or work as well.  

[Jenn The Heathen]

Re: Duggars playing music... It always seemed to me that there wasn’t a lot of structure in Duggarvile and couple that with the fact that the kids essentially had to run the household (cooking, cleaning), etc and when we’re they were supposed to practice? 

[grandmadugger]

I have always wondered why violins. Why not guitar or fiddle? Both are used in hymns and commonly seen in baptist church services. Plus there are tons of talented people playing those instruments in their area. 

[VVV]

18 minutes ago, grandmadugger said:

I have always wondered why violins. Why not guitar or fiddle? Both are used in hymns and commonly seen in baptist church services. Plus there are tons of talented people playing those instruments in their area. 

You know the only difference between a violin and a fiddle is that nobody minds if you spill beer on their fiddle, right? 

Seriously anyone trained in classical violin technique can learn fiddle tunes though it doesn't work the same in reverse. And thanks to decades of Suzuki, fractional sized violins for children are very easy to find pretty much anywhere. I'm sure there are fractional guitars but I doubt they're as ubiquitous, and I also think that there are fewer guitar teachers specializing in teaching young children.

[HarleyQuinn]

I remember an episode where Erin Bates was showing some of the J'Slaves how to play fiddle. 

I always assumed violins because they got a deal buying them in bulk or something.  

[Cleopatra7]

8 hours ago, grandmadugger said:

I have always wondered why violins. Why not guitar or fiddle? Both are used in hymns and commonly seen in baptist church services. Plus there are tons of talented people playing those instruments in their area. 

I think Gothard has some kind of teaching about piano and violin being “godly instruments,” but don’t quote me on it.

[Four is Enough]

9 hours ago, Cleopatra7 said:

I think Gothard has some kind of teaching about piano and violin being “godly instruments,” but don’t quote me on it.

I can see that. Lots of pianos in churches... violins and harps associated with "heavenly music" (gag did I just say that) so of course GotHard had to have an opinion.

 

If only the Duggars would put a LITTLE effort into making a decent, uncanned noise. It doesn't even seem as if the violins are tuned most of the time.