The Fundies are going to be happy.... Porn Study

[alysee]

According to this "study" women are unhappy when men look at porn because they can't be like porn stars. http://vitals.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2012/ ... steem?lite

[Elle]

Misleading article. What's unpleasant about men looking at porn is that they're preferring to look at another woman's body than his wife's. Many men don't want their wives looking at other men's penises in porn instead of looking at them. While there are plenty of couples who enjoy porn together, and while I think more people don't care for porn and really don't want their significant others to view porn, this doesn't mean it should be illegal or anything, provided the participants in it are there willingly and aren't people who feel backed into a corner with no other options.

[Peas n carrots]

TBH it wouldn't bother me if DH occasionally checked it out. If it gives him new ideas, all the better! I think it's a problem when you quit doing other things in your life to feed your need.

[Witsec7]

Misleading article. What's unpleasant about men looking at porn is that they're preferring to look at another woman's body than his wife's. Many men don't want their wives looking at other men's penises in porn instead of looking at them. While there are plenty of couples who enjoy porn together, and while I think more people don't care for porn and really don't want their significant others to view porn, this doesn't mean it should be illegal or anything, provided the participants in it are there willingly and aren't people who feel backed into a corner with no other options.

Please consider that mass marketed porn also portrays the barbie bodies that are significantly enhanced, shaved and depict a sexual iconography that some women don't find acceptable.

[xDreamerx]

Please consider that mass marketed porn also portrays the barbie bodies that are significantly enhanced, shaved and depict a sexual iconography that some women don't find acceptable.

Exactly. This is why I disagree with porn (in terms of choosing not to watch it myself). It makes women into sexual objects, not sexual agents. It promotes an aesthetic dictated entirely by men, one that is incredibly artificial and infantilizing. I remember hearing that snuff porn is one of the highest grossing sectors which I find incredibly disturbing beyond words. To me porn is just a fuckload of misogyny on film.

I recommend a documentary called The Price of Pleasure. It used to be on YouTube but isn't anymore. Though it might be floating around the internet.

[Kaylee]

I recommend a documentary called The Price of Pleasure. It used to be on YouTube but isn't anymore. Though it might be floating around the internet.

Oh, people are trying to get it categorized as offensive. One of the professors at my former school just lost her job because she showed part of the censored version of it in a sociology class.

[Witsec7]

TY for the tip Dreamer I'm going to look for it.

[xDreamerx]

Oh, people are trying to get it categorized as offensive. One of the professors at my former school just lost her job because she showed part of the censored version of it in a sociology class.

I wouldn't call it offensive. We watched it in my Women's Studies class. But, I would say that is definitely mature in it's content. It does show some porn clips and describes things in a graphic manner. But it's not like they just show it for shock value or to no end. It's to help make their argument.

[BravaAmica]

TY for the tip Dreamer I'm going to look for it.

It's streaming on [uS] Netflix.

[samithemage]

My SO and I both enjoy porn, so it's something we both enjoy within our relationship. However, neither of us has ever expected the other to be a porn star. We enjoy watching the fantasy for what it is, but are entirely capable of "normal" sex without "crazy porn kinky times." It so depends on the couple and their relationship.

[desertvixen]

Please consider that mass marketed porn also portrays the barbie bodies that are significantly enhanced, shaved and depict a sexual iconography that some women don't find acceptable.

Second this.

[Minerva]

My partner and I enjoy porn separately. We both feel weird when looking at it together, but are totally cool with each other doing it on their own. Obviously people who don't like porn don't have to, but I consider it a bit of a duty to support non-misogynist porn.

[Mela99]

My almost-hubs isn't into porn, but I'm not sure it would bother me if he was. If it did bug me, it would be because I think it's a waste of time. And why look when we could both be having fun together? Maybe TMI, but that's my take on it

[luckystone]

I'm torn on porn. I think there's a lot that is really messed up about it and it is pretty misogynistic. I think it's pretty cruel to men too. Often you don't see them, they are off-screen except for their penis! So it turns both people into objects.

On the other hand, I think a lot of people are capable of finding it arousing even if they know it's not realistic. I like it sometimes. It seems pretty common for the young men I know to watch it fairly regularly, even if they have partners. It terrifies me slightly that pretty much all the guys I know saw videos of strangers having sex before they ever had any sexual contact of their own. Yet despite this, all the guys I've been involved with have never made a nasty comment about my body or expected I be shaven or do weird things. In fact, my boyfriends have been negative about the hair and kink issue and prefer amateur porn. Admittedly, I'm extremely careful in my choice of partners, but even so, I think most mature men can tell the difference between fantasy and reality. Honestly, if a shaved girl with fake boobs and blonde hair showed up at a guy's house suggesting crazy sex, they'd probably freak out lol. I think they are also smart enough to realise they are not as as buff or abnormally well-endowed as most guys in the videos. Or maybe I'm giving them too much credit.

[pixydust]

My SO and I both enjoy porn, so it's something we both enjoy within our relationship. However, neither of us has ever expected the other to be a porn star. We enjoy watching the fantasy for what it is, but are entirely capable of "normal" sex without "crazy porn kinky times." It so depends on the couple and their relationship.

This, exactly! We are both pretty damn visual and voyeristic and like porn, we watch it together sometimes, seperatly sometimes. As long as we are not useing it instead of being with each other, it's not a problem for us.

[Elle]

Please consider that mass marketed porn also portrays the barbie bodies that are significantly enhanced, shaved and depict a sexual iconography that some women don't find acceptable.

I know that. I'm not saying I like porn, just that it shouldn't be illegal as long as the participants are fully willing. I don't like it at all. Almost all of it reduces women far more than men to nothing by sexual playthings for someone else's gratification. But my dislike for it doesn't mean it should be outlawed. I do think there should be more protections in place though, like employers being required to have free and confidential counseling for their sex-performing employees because I am concerned that some actors and actresses have a hard time handling what they're doing or want out or feel like they have no other options, but can't afford counseling on their own, and I think it's important to protect those who don't actually enjoy being there. I used to live close enough to Porn Valley that I drove by the Vivid studio often (funny, there's a large church next door), and knew some people who did porn and LOVED doing it, but also some who did it for a while just to pay the bills, but then have to live with videos being out there forever. If porn were outlawed, those who feel backed into a corner would have less help available to them. Prostitutes in Clark County, Nevada, are better off and safer off that prostitutes in areas where it's illegal. We don't need to make porn more dangerous by driving it underground.

[Elle]

This, exactly! We are both pretty damn visual and voyeristic and like porn, we watch it together sometimes, seperatly sometimes. As long as we are not useing it instead of being with each other, it's not a problem for us.

There's ONE I admit we get a kick out of, because it's a parody and not meant to be taken seriously at all. It's called Madame's Family, and it's an Addam's Family spoof. In it the Morticia-based character (I can't remember what they named her) suggested running a brothel. Tuesday and Gomer (all the names were spoofed off the originals) had a weird daughter-father thing going on, Ron Jeremy played Uncle Pester and made the character creepier than he is in the original show, etc.. Not at all sexy, just a bad porn that was intentionally and for laughs.

[Witsec7]

I know that. I'm not saying I like porn, just that it shouldn't be illegal as long as the participants are fully willing. I don't like it at all. Almost all of it reduces women far more than men to nothing by sexual playthings for someone else's gratification. But my dislike for it doesn't mean it should be outlawed. I do think there should be more protections in place though, like employers being required to have free and confidential counseling for their sex-performing employees because I am concerned that some actors and actresses have a hard time handling what they're doing or want out or feel like they have no other options, but can't afford counseling on their own, and I think it's important to protect those who don't actually enjoy being there. I used to live close enough to Porn Valley that I drove by the Vivid studio often (funny, there's a large church next door), and knew some people who did porn and LOVED doing it, but also some who did it for a while just to pay the bills, but then have to live with videos being out there forever. If porn were outlawed, those who feel backed into a corner would have less help available to them. Prostitutes in Clark County, Nevada, are better off and safer off that prostitutes in areas where it's illegal. We don't need to make porn more dangerous by driving it underground.

I replied to your initial post as written. Your response indicates that you didn't include this option although you may have 'thought' about it. And please, I've already had breakfast, I'm not much in the mood to gobble up your red herrings. I don't need to hear some pile of crap about giving counseling to folks who have been exploited by the mainstream commercial porn industry.

FWIW I have no problem with consenting adults enjoying non exploitative porn.

[Cran]

I've got no problem if my SO looks at porn (which he does). I go as far as sometimes send him pictures of women he might find attractive (we do not share flats) and make my little jokes about that.

We can keep fantasy and reality apart. I know he wants to have ME in his bed, the combination of character, personality and looks I present. He knows the pictures of these women are only templates for fantasies, and everybody has them.

If porn and the fantasies connected with it become more meaningful than actual intercourse, then something is wrong, imho.