No such thing as a failed courtship

[emmiedahl]

I think most people have a preference. This might belong in the controversial opinions section, but I have told my oldest this story: I really, really wanted him to be a girl. And then when he was born, I was so in love that I would not have traded him for any girl out there. I still wouldn't.

[demgirl]

Oh, don't get me wrong -- I totally believe most/many people have a preference and I don't think it's a bad thing to tell the story to a child after you are sure that child can understand, like with your son emmiedahl. I just think it's a really bad idea to put it up on your blog before your child is even born.

[erunerune]

Firstly: I heart Lewis +eleventy

Twoly: I think it's fine to have a gender preference for a baby, so long as one generally keeps that to oneself and has the common sense to realize that whatever gender baby that comes along is the baby to be thrilled about, not the imaginary baby that one has pre-ordered. Announcing you'd prefer a boy on the internet is kinda pointless and could make someone feel bad down the road.

Also, when I was pregnant and nosy, stupid people insisted on asking what I preferred, I followed my own advice and kept own naive, not-yet-mom-to-baby-outside-the-uterus preferences to my own ridiculous self. Cause what? I'm gonna send that baby back if it's the "wrong" one? Totally no one's business, I tell ya.

[emmiedahl]

It really is no one's business, but when it comes to pregnancy everyone and their Italian grandma think it's okay to invade your privacy. It's not just what gender you want, but what you'll name it, whether you'll circumcize, have you lost your mucus plug yet? lol people need to get a grip sometimes.

[Lewis]

"Married with a baby on the way. She met her husband several weeks after the first courtship ended."

Total rebound. I feel sorry for her. And him.

[duplessis3]

I told people that I'd let the baby decide what gender the baby was. Kind of cut off all conversation.

[nolongerIFBx]

I have sympathy for this girl because this mindset was instilled in her and it must be devastating to live your life this way. I'd have more sympathy if she didn't put it on the damn internet, where it will live FOREVER, that she'd prefer a boy. That would be just super to be her kid if it's a girl -- checking out the wayback machine, seeing your mom's blog and realizing you were born with the non-preferred genetalia.

oooh- this has been burning me up for two weeks! I know someone else who the moment they (he!) announced their honeymoon baby pregnancy has been bragging about how he was going to have a boy; he was just sure of it. Well, he indeed is having a son and said right in front of his brother's girl children (I'm paraphasing as I don't remember the exact words as I was seeing red!) "Hah, I got it right the first time". Like having a girl child was a failure! And right in front of those poor little girls. Never was a big fan, but I have lost all respect.

I always thought I would prefer a boy first as I like having an older brother, but now I am firmly in the position of "Boy or girl? I want a child. The gender isn't an issue." Maybe I wouldn't even want to find out. If a child is just someone to carry on your name then please don't bother to have children.