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Rachel Hollis Controversy


Bluebirdbluebell

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Rachel Hollis, author of NYT best-selling books Girl, Go Wash Your Face, and Girl, Stop Apologizing, is in trouble over a controversial Tik-Tok post.

She's a motivational speaker who rose to prominence in 2018 with her book Girl, Go Wash Your Face. She was motivational speaker who had both her own events and spoke at MLM events. She and her husband Dave were also giving marriage advice and holding marriage conferences until their divorce in 2020.

She recently got into controversy when she compared herself to famous women in history including Harriet Tubman, Amelia Earheart, Malala Yousafzai, etc. 

Rachel Hollis did start out as Christian motivational speaker. She is the daughter of Pentecostal minister. She was somewhat rejected by Christians for not being conservative enough. I wasn't sure if this belonged here or in the quiver full of snark. Her religious bringing seems to still be influencing her to some degree.

There are a lot of Youtube videos about that give more information about Hollis, both her bio and reactions to current controversy.

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I read this when first posted and then came back from the M is for Mama thread and clicked through to the link and read all that. 

I just wanted to say I agree with Rachel Cargle (no idea who she is either tbh, but she made good points) with the whole yes, self-care is good but if you aren't doing anything but self-care it's not activism, it's pampering.

(Also why all these Bali retreats? I get why Australian wellness 'influencers' hold them there - it's relatively close and cheaper/easier for most people to get to than Byron, but it's freaking miles away from the US. It's not like you can easily go for a weekend and come back.)

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I’m so glad we get to talk about THIS narcissistic twit! Rachel Hollis is just so awful.
Literally YEARS of straight up making money from being married. Books. Podcasts. Retreats. In-person conferences. I mean literally that’s the brand - happily married successful Christian influencer will teach you how to be just like her! But she’s actually in a marriage that’s crumbling and in the process of separation and this is happening over three years..... WHILE she’s teaching other people about how to have a successful marriage. And sees no problem with doing that.
Then a month after her divorce is announced, comes out with a book (a relatable, quip-filled one) on recovering from trauma like a divorce. Which she had to have been writing for at least a year, without ever whispering that her perfect marriage might not be perfect.
Mind you, her book on recovering from divorce comes out a month after being divorced, so not only is she spouting baseless crap about marriage, she’s spouting it about divorce, too!! She’s talking about divorce and co-parenting with a former spouse without actually doing it. Ever.

She’s AWFUL. This idea she sells, where hard work is all it takes and everyone is starting at the same place, is classist, racist CRAP.
The most recent controversy shouldn’t even be controversial, because everybody should know that Rachel’s words are only for upper middle class white ladies.

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18 minutes ago, bea said:

I’m so glad we get to talk about THIS narcissistic twit! Rachel Hollis is just so awful.
Literally YEARS of straight up making money from being married. Books. Podcasts. Retreats. In-person conferences. I mean literally that’s the brand - happily married successful Christian influencer will teach you how to be just like her! But she’s actually in a marriage that’s crumbling and in the process of separation and this is happening over three years..... WHILE she’s teaching other people about how to have a successful marriage. And sees no problem with doing that.
Then a month after her divorce is announced, comes out with a book (a relatable, quip-filled one) on recovering from trauma like a divorce. Which she had to have been writing for at least a year, without ever whispering that her perfect marriage might not be perfect.
Mind you, her book on recovering from divorce comes out a month after being divorced, so not only is she spouting baseless crap about marriage, she’s spouting it about divorce, too!! She’s talking about divorce and co-parenting with a former spouse without actually doing it. Ever.

She’s AWFUL. This idea she sells, where hard work is all it takes and everyone is starting at the same place, is classist, racist CRAP.
The most recent controversy shouldn’t even be controversial, because everybody should know that Rachel’s words are only for upper middle class white ladies.

You left out the word "relatable" which is another controversy that just happened. Her brand has always been "being relatable". Her first "viral" moment was when she shared an image on instagram of her stretch mark belly that gave birth to three healthy boys. And then she throws attitude on a tiktok that screamed what makes you think I want to be RELATABLE.?

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I really hate when extremely privileged people try to be motivational speakers. She really has no clue. 

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41 minutes ago, bea said:

The most recent controversy shouldn’t even be controversial, because everybody should know that Rachel’s words are only for upper middle class white ladies.

She's been working with MLMs though. People who end up selling for MLMs aren't always "upper class". MLMs prey on people's desire to make money especially when they don't have money. MLMs use all kinds of motivational speakers, books, etc. to try to keep people in the MLM and spending money.

I actually learned who Hollis was, from looking at Anti-MLM videos on Youtube.

Edited by Bluebirdbluebell
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4 hours ago, bea said:

Literally YEARS of straight up making money from being married. Books. Podcasts. Retreats. In-person conferences. I mean literally that’s the brand - happily married successful Christian influencer will teach you how to be just like her!

I honestly don't get how people make money from this. I mean, I've been with my husband for... um... over two decades I think and neither of us could make money off it- quite possibly because neither of us have the ego? (chutzpah? hubris? arrogance? really not sure what word exactly) to claim we have any super special secret or advice to give.

But then I also wouldn't pay to go to these kind of retreats either, so I don't really understand why people do, and how the influencer thing really works. 

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22 minutes ago, Ozlsn said:

I honestly don't get how people make money from this. I mean, I've been with my husband for... um... over two decades I think and neither of us could make money off it- quite possibly because neither of us have the ego? (chutzpah? hubris? arrogance? really not sure what word exactly) to claim we have any super special secret or advice to give.

But then I also wouldn't pay to go to these kind of retreats either, so I don't really understand why people do, and how the influencer thing really works. 

She also made money off of the connections she made through her husband’s job. He was an executive at Disney with a high paying job. She had a party planning business for awhile and all her clients were rich coworkers from his job at Disney. So sure she was successful, but she had a lot of help through those connections. If she had started completely from scratch without the help of her husband, she wouldn’t have been as successful. She then used that “success” to show everyone how they can be successful too. 

Edited by JermajestyDuggar
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I never liked her and feel somewhat vindicated that her nastiness has become more public. Someone tried to get me to read “Girl, Wash your Face” when it first came out but I never read it because it sounded so stupid. I didn’t know the term toxic positivity back then but I was always turned off by books written by people like her or the Girl Defined women. I couldn’t relate to them even when I was a Christian. I’m glad her anti-relatable rant went viral and I hope she ends up sinking into anonymity. Unfortunately she’ll probably simply rebrand and gain even more followers than before!

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17 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

If she had started completely from scratch without the help of her husband, she wouldn’t have been as successful. She then used that “success” to show everyone how they can be successful too. 

I suspect she may not have been successful at all, unless she had 

I came across something last month criticizing various click-bait-y articles online, like "How my husband and I were able to buy a house during the pandemic even though we were laid off!"   The author pointed out that somewhere in more than one of these accounts is the phrase..."With the help of an inheritance..." 

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13 minutes ago, Howl said:

I suspect she may not have been successful at all, unless she had 

I came across something last month criticizing various click-bait-y articles online, like "How my husband and I were able to buy a house during the pandemic even though we were laid off!"   The author pointed out that somewhere in more than one of these accounts is the phrase..."With the help of an inheritance..." 

It is extremely rare to find a true rags to riches story. I know I sound like a Debbie Downer, but most people will never go from poverty to even upper middle class in their lifetime. Although people don’t want to Admit it, when you live in poverty, everything is completely stacked against you. And even if you work your ass off 24/7, it is no guarantee you will become rich. 

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We read Girl, Wash Your Face in our bookclub because so many people in our area were gaga over it. Every single one of us hated her book. We have never agreed over anything so completely as our disgust of that book. I threw the book in the trash afterwards.  

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5 minutes ago, FaithAndReason said:

We read Girl, Wash Your Face in our bookclub because so many people in our area were gaga over it. Every single one of us hated her book. We have never agreed over anything so completely as our disgust of that book. I threw the book in the trash afterwards.  

I have heard reviews of the book on youtube, but I've never read it. Please feel free to share more.

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I only discovered her Hollis a few days ago when I saw something in the news. I checked out her social media and reviews of her books on Amazon.

It never ceases to amaze me how folks like this can attract huge fan bases of women who see them as humble, sincere, and "real," when they're absolutely NOT ... and then become so disillusionioned when they finally catch a glimpse of how entitled and tone-deaf these "influencers" really are.

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I try very hard not to put any public figure on a pedestal. We are all flawed. Some more than others. I like Kamala Harris but I refuse to put her on a pedestal and act like she’s perfection personified. She’s not. She will make mistakes just like other VPs. But I voted for Biden and Harris because I think they will do things that will make this country better. Not because I fangirl either of them. If I put them on a pedestal, I’m setting myself up for disappointment. I’ve also found that once you put someone on a pedestal, you will defend them even when they are Fucking up royally. It clouds your judgment. 

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On 4/22/2021 at 12:21 PM, bea said:

The most recent controversy shouldn’t even be controversial, because everybody should know that Rachel’s words are only for upper middle class white ladies.

Speaking of  upper class white ladies: When I worked admin at a Big State Univ., a prof at the University's law school (who was also the wife of a law school prof) came out with a book about how important it is to take time off to raise your kids, criticizing moms who didn't.   Law school profs make BIG BANK, easily in the generous six figures -- these are people who can drop the salary of one parent and still live quite comfortably, especially if the husband was (is) a successful lawyer. 

I read the reviews and the inherent entitlement was staggering.  This woman literally had no clue, or didn't care, that almost all working women with kids are trying to keep their heads above water financially and were tied to jobs with health care benefits.  She was also clueless that, unlike her, working women can't just take a leave of absence for a few years, and then pick right back up when ready. 

Side note: F**king academia. Some students (and some profs) did not realize that employees at the university worked through the summer, or that we came to work at 8 and left at 5, with minimal flexibility.  Faculty who had actually lived in the world and had real-world jobs on the way to academia were so different from people who went straight through undergrad, grad, tenure track, tenured professor, full professor without a break.  

Rant *officially* off. 

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Is Rachel the one who lamented how challenging it was adopting a substance addicted baby, trash talked the birth mother, all the while using vodka and Xanax to cope?  Maybe I am mixing her up with another rich and privileged motivational cunt.

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Weren’t there rumors that she was having an affair with Brandon Hatmaker, and that was (at least part of) the reason for her divorce and the sudden divorce between Brandon and Jen Hatmaker? I don’t know that I’ve heard any proof of this, though. 

49 minutes ago, pook said:

Is Rachel the one who lamented how challenging it was adopting a substance addicted baby, trash talked the birth mother, all the while using vodka and Xanax to cope?  Maybe I am mixing her up with another rich and privileged motivational cunt.

I’m pretty sure that was someone else, but I may very well be wrong. All these idiots run together after awhile. 

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I first heard of her months ago on an anti MLM channel talking about how she was always giving speeches at MLM conferences and how she had often stole quotes from people and tried to pass it off as her own. Her recent comments are disgusting, she has every right to hire a cleaner but she shouldn't disrespect them and her whole relatable speech was horrible. Marrying a Disney executive was always going to make her starting her own business easier, if I started a party planning business in my small town where the only famous people are a couple of minor Scottish actors, a man who died recently who was known as being the youngest person arrested for trying to overthrow general Franco and an explorer who was born over 200 years ago it isn't going to make me millionaire. Her telling people that they can be as successful as her if they work hard is just not true and her putting down people not as successful as her because she believes they don't work like she does is just disgraceful. 

Her whole making money of giving marriage advice then divorcing saying it was something they had considered for years is also shitty too. 

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8 minutes ago, pook said:

@caviemom

I was right!  It's all here:

https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/lauraturner/rachel-hollis-girl-wash-your-face-self-help-book

You need to scroll closer to the bottom of the article.

Oh, wow, she is an extra-special idiot. I think maybe my brain just couldn’t comprehend that this could all be one person. You’d think I’d know better, having been on FJ forever. 

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1 hour ago, caviemom said:

Oh, wow, she is an extra-special idiot. I think maybe my brain just couldn’t comprehend that this could all be one person. You’d think I’d know better, having been on FJ forever. 

I will say one thing about the last five years: when I read fiction now, I no longer say "Nobody would be that stupid." There are a few authors that I like a lot that lean heavily on character stupidity to move the plot along, but that doesn't faze me nearly as much as it used to. 

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A little off topic but I also really hate Gretchen Ruben, author of the Happiness Project. She was going to speak at Hollis’s conference. Same type as Hollis only less religious and a lot of political privilege. It really irks me how these people package and commodify happiness without acknowledging social and racial inequities. Totally full of shit and contributing to a culture of self-blame.

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7 hours ago, Howl said:

Side note: F**king academia. Some students (and some profs) did not realize that employees at the university worked through the summer, or that we came to work at 8 and left at 5, with minimal flexibility.  Faculty who had actually lived in the world and had real-world jobs on the way to academia were so different from people who went straight through undergrad, grad, tenure track, tenured professor, full professor without a break.  

Rant *officially* off. 

University employee here. The disparity between faculty and support staff is definitely most apparent during summer. With complete impunity, many of them bring their kids to campus with them all summer long, while we office workers are paying through the nose for summer camps and before & aftercare (‘cause, you know, 8:30 - 5 with zero flexibility, because time off it based on seniority)

Edited by Denim Jumper
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She didn't just compare herself to women like Harriet Turman, she did it after bragging about having a woman "to scrub her toilets " and when people complained she was unrelatable she went on her tangent about how all the strongest women in history; like Tubman, have been unrelatable.

That's a whole mess of racism and privilege that makes her BS even worse IMO.

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