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Dillards 36: Seating for Family of Four Now


Coconut Flan

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I wouldn't read much into the bible verses that Derrick or anyone else posts. They all have such bizarre, literal, legalistic interpretations of the bible that there's no way to be clear on what they mean. 

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As I was about to post in the previous thread, I've heard the verse Derick used applied to lots of different situations and I don't think we can infer anything from it.

One thing I've often heard it used for is for calming down people who think that the modern era is uniquely sinful. They point out that every "sin" has always been around and that there's "nothing new under the sun."

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I always find it odd when fundies quote Ecclesiastes because it flies so hard in the face of all that mandatory cheerfulness. 

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I'm still leaning toward they are embarrassed at their own stupidity.  Risking her own life is a no brainier for Jill, as others have said it would be the ultimate Godly sacrifice, but risking the infants life is sinful. If she can she'll get pregnant again, she won't go to a doctor again and may not be as lucky next time because they are too ignorant, and they want to prove they are right and science is wrong.  I'm very cranky today, my husbands sister literally dropped dead yesterday at 42, she refused to follow doctors orders and she'd dead as a result. She wasn't pregnant but she had a list of medical problems. Dying young by doing something against medical advice is so fucking pointless.  If she loved her boys she'd take care o herself to raise them and be their mom not just their birth giver. 

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Didn't Jim Bob and Michelle just now get back from their trip to Hawaii? If something went seriously wrong with Jill, they'd cut their trip short and hurry on back to support her...right?

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1 minute ago, Stormy said:

Didn't Jim Bob and Michelle just now get back from their trip to Hawaii? If something went seriously wrong with Jill, they'd cut their trip short and hurry on back to support her...right?

Pretty sure they left a while after Jill gave birth to Samuel. That being said, I don't know, they left a micro-premie in the NICU to go and protest alcohol. 

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28 minutes ago, Stormy said:

Didn't Jim Bob and Michelle just now get back from their trip to Hawaii? If something went seriously wrong with Jill, they'd cut their trip short and hurry on back to support her...right?

Those two have never really been shining examples of parental love and support, but I admit I'd had the same thought myself.

It's unfortunate, really. I know that if I ever had a tough birth, or heck even just a birth at all I'd have a hard time getting a moment to myself in the few weeks after because my mother probably wouldn't leave until she was absolutely sure everything was 100% okay (having experienced hard pregnancies and difficulties after all delivering all three of us she's extra careful to support new mothers and those who've just had a baby). 

It is sad that, despite having such a huge family and being often shown to be the favourite daughter, Jill was left so soon after her second emergency c-section (I think it was an emergency?). I'm not one who believes that grandparents should put their entire lives on hold just because their (grown up, adult) child had a baby, but to leave the country not even three weeks after she'd given birth just isn't sitting right with me. 

And really I think it reflects poorly on their (Jimbob and Michelle's) whole pro-life stance. Just another example of them not giving a toss after the baby gets out just as long as it does and fuck whatever the mother has to go through in order for it to happen. 

Actually, maybe I'm just projecting. I'm sure they do care as much as they are able to do in their apparently checked out heads. I don't mean to insinuate that they don't love Jill or Samuel, but If Jill really did have a traumatic birth, or has Zika, or anything else worst-case or tragic happened, her parents leaving to go on a holiday is just straight up coldhearted. 

So, really, kudos to Cathy for taking care of Israel for as long as she did, because that's exactly the kind of support I bet Jill really appreciated whilst she recovered from her birth experience and got to bond with her new baby, and it was really kind and decent of Cathy to do that. It just seems to me offering support and delivering with that offer is much more loving a way to treat your grandchildren than to just assign them a number out of 200 and immediately go back to waiting for the next one to pop out. 

Okay I'm done and I'm sorry. The tone of this post was a little acidic but i did have good intentions. Boob and J'Chelle just really make me mad sometimes, and I was potentially unfair.

(also @Stormy i'm sorry i promise this wasn't a rant at you it just got away from me)

 

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Whoever asked in the last thread if it's bad that they hope Jill had a hysterectomy... Fuck you. Seriously. 

I was on complete bedrest at 23 weeks, with terbutaline and procardia to help me not have contractions less than 2 minutes apart. I was in and out of the hospital a dozen times until finally at 33w4d, they couldn't stop my labor. I spent 9 days in the hospital recovering, and my daughter was in NICU for 6 weeks. I had to have a complete hysterectomy at the age of 24. TWENTY FOUR. I'm only 34, and I've been on HRT for the last 10 years. I grieved the loss of my ability to have any more children and the loss of everything that (I felt at the time) made me a woman. My now-ex-husband got his mistress pregnant, and said that he was glad that he could finally be with someone who isn't broken, one who could finally give him the son he always wanted. That hurt so incredibly badly.

You have NO CLUE how devastating having one's fertility taken away can be. Unless and/or until you know the pain of it yourself, keep your damn piehole shut. Please and thank you.

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1 hour ago, allthegoodnamesrgone said:

I'm still leaning toward they are embarrassed at their own stupidity.  Risking her own life is a no brainier for Jill, as others have said it would be the ultimate Godly sacrifice, but risking the infants life is sinful. If she can she'll get pregnant again, she won't go to a doctor again and may not be as lucky next time because they are too ignorant, and they want to prove they are right and science is wrong.  I'm very cranky today, my husbands sister literally dropped dead yesterday at 42, she refused to follow doctors orders and she'd dead as a result. She wasn't pregnant but she had a list of medical problems. Dying young by doing something against medical advice is so fucking pointless.  If she loved her boys she'd take care o herself to raise them and be their mom not just their birth giver. 

Sorry for your loss.

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@EscadoraJust want to point out that Michelle and JimBob didn't leave the country as Hawaii is a state. :pb_lol:

@MotherOfDragonsI'm so sorry you had to not only deal with the loss of your fertility at such a young age, but also with such an asshole partner. I know it's been ten years, but I hope you're doing ok (or at least continuing to move towards a place of acceptance and peace.) :romance-grouphug:

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What were Boob and Mechelle doing in Hawaii? Did they go alone or take the Howler Monkeys, too? It's an odd vacation spot for people who like to Nike and won't wear bathing suits. 

It doesn't surprise me at all that Mechelle didn't stick around to help Jill. She probably figures she raised the first 8-9 kids for about a decade without help, so Jill can handle two by herself. Besides, Mechelle isn't maternal. She is a pregnancy addict, not a caregiver.

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@MotherOfDragons I'm glad you said that! I felt angry when I read the thoughts of the previous poster, but I haven't been through that myself. I do want children, but even if I didn't, I feel it would be devastating to have one's fertility taken away like that. Not just because it remove the possibility of pregnancy, but because it removes part of your body! Period! It's not something I would wish on anyone.

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2 hours ago, Million Children For Jesus said:

What were Boob and Mechelle doing in Hawaii? Did they go alone or take the Howler Monkeys, too? It's an odd vacation spot for people who like to Nike and won't wear bathing suits. 

Apparently it was for their 33rd anniversary. (33 years and 19 kids, yeesh!)

According to Ellie and Lily's synopsis of their first holiday video, "Among other activities, the Duggar couple took a helicopter ride, visited one of the island's iconic waterfalls, and attended the rodeo." So it doesn't sound like they've really been spending time at the beach, but rather sticking to activities that mean people are likely to be more covered up. And since they said they wished the kids and grandkids could be there with them, I'm pretty sure they went alone, with just their own cameras to record their trip. *crosses fingers it's not on Counting On*

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Probably going to get downvoted all to hell but I'm a big girl. I can take it.

I am a strong believer in karma and accountability for one's actions.  IF, and I do mean IF,  Jill made stupid choices that negatively affected Sam and were the direct cause of her possibly needing a hysterectomy, then I won't feel sorry for her. Between her holier than thou bullshit and the fact that with her "training" she *should* know better, if she blatantly and knowingly screwed up and the result was damage to her reproductive health, it would would be what she deserves. Now if she did everything right and things went bad, she absolutely has my sympathies, as would anyone. 

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32 minutes ago, Shadoewolf said:

IF, and I do mean IF,  Jill made stupid choices that negatively affected Sam and were the direct cause of her possibly needing a hysterectomy, then I won't feel sorry for her.

(Bolding mine)

There's the difference right there. Not feeling sorry for a person who has to face consequences of their bad decisions is one thing; someone straight-up, without qualifying any reason, saying they hope she had to have a hysterectomy is a whole 'nother story.

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This is why I feel bad for her if, and only if, she had to get a hysterectomy. Jill's entire life is centered around having children. She feels she was born to give birth if you will. And even though her actions, should they have been faulty, and it sounds like they probably were, it will devastate her. Do I like her? No. Do I like their views? Totally not. Would I wish mental devastation on anyone, absolutely not. At the end of the day, we don't know what's going on yet, but we can all agree that no one should have to feel the utter disappointment that Jill will face should she have had her fertility taken away. I just hope her family doesn't shame her for it.

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JB and DQ's trip to Hawaii was for an anniversary, and therefore booked in advance. Possibly even a year (so before Jill's stick turned blue) in advance?  Given that babies are going to be arriving thick and fast in the next few years it's always possible that any plans will clash with a birth, and so I won't snark on them not cutting the trip short/cancelling based on Jill giving birth. There's more than enough capable family on hand to help out if required, and FaceTime   to catch up while they're away. Doesn't mean they don't care.

.

but this is JB and DQ we're taking about. They're probably just glad to get a bit of peace and quiet and had no intentions of giving that up.

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