I'm a Horrible Cat-mom

[mallallory]

I have been accidentally starving my cat.  

Several months ago she began throwing up with increasing frequency, at the worst it was at least once per day.  I ended up doing an elimination diet and it turns out that she's allergic to fish.  During this time we saw the vet, who recommended that I make an appointment to have her teeth cleaned and to come back in if anything further happened.  When I took all fish out of her diet she got better and the throwing up masses of undigested food stopped.  I noticed over the 4th of July holiday that she seemed to have lost more weight and her fur looked off, like it was thinning.  She'd always been fat and the vet said the weight loss between January and the end of May was not ideal, but it was a good weight for her.  She's been looking for more affection lately and jumping up on the kitchen counters, which is unlike her.  I made another appointment on Friday for this Tuesday.  Today I checked her teeth, one of the back teeth is cracked, jagged and sharp.  When I put down food I stayed in the kitchen making my dinner, usually I don't stay in there after I put down food; she was obviously hungry but wasn't eating and attacked the chicken broth ice cube I put out.  So then I microwaved her food with some chicken broth and she gobbled that all up.  Her food has been disappearing for weeks because her sister is a fatty and eating it all.  I used to buy Blue food which she could just swallow, this new fish-less food is too big to swallow I realized today.  

My poor cat who kept me company in Japan, road tripped with me from my husband's last duty station to California, and likes to sleep under the covers with me or by my head, has been starving because I was too broke to make an appointment to get her teeth fixed.  Obviously, I'm having her teeth done now, and the budget will somehow be juggled to make it work.  I feel like absolute shit, you guys.  I've been apologizing to her all night. 

[CrazyCatLady]

Aww. You didn't know. She will be feeling better soon and is lucky to someone who cares so much about her!

[PennySycamore]

@mallallory,  

Dogs tend to let you know when they're sick, but cats can be pretty ill before they let you know.  You are not a "horrible cat-mom" at all.  You've tried to treat her fish allergy and now you're getting her teeth fixed.  I know that is expensive and it's not a decision to made lightly for most all of us cat-moms.   You've loved your cats as best you can and you'll keep on doing so.  Give your cats a scritch from me.

[mallallory]

@CrazyCatLady and @PennySycamore, thank you both very much.  The vet suggested a blood panel and it came back as lymphoma, and she said the weight loss is likely a combination of her teeth and complications/symptoms of the cancer.  The doctor suggested duck and rabbit, so she's getting Stella and Chewy's raw rabbit food sauteed and dry duck food soaked to soften it up.  She refused to even try the raw food and when I tried to pass the bag off on my mom or my sister they suggested I try cooking it, now she loves it.  

We're going to try steroids and vitamin D shots, but she seems to be getting worse.  She's dehydrated despite seeing her drink more than ever and she's even more lethargic almost daily.  Shit sucks. 

[AuntCloud]

@mallallory big hugs. Please remember you're doing everything in your ability for your furbaby, and cats are just not into sharing health information with their humans. Love on her as much as you can - she sounds like an amazing, loving kitty.

[PennySycamore]

Oh no!  @mallallory, I am so sorry that your kitty's blood panel showed lymphoma.  Cherish each day you have with her.  Hopefully the course of her cancer won't be too painful and that you'll have many months left to share with her.  

[Grimalkin]

Oh no I am so sorry to hear

this.

[Kailash]

How heartbreaking! I'm so sorry she's sick.

[CrazyCatLady]

Sad to hear this. Glad she has your love!

[Gossamer1]

I'm so sorry to hear this. 

[47of74]

Hugs.  It's never easy when furry family members become sick and when their time comes.  I remember how much it pained me the last year when my fur niece Morgan (avatar kitty) was alive seeing the kitty that used to be such a ball of fur and energy slowing down and not wanting to do anything.  When she passed back in 2013, it was almost as painful a loss for me as losing human family members.

I hope your furbaby's remaining time here on Earth is as pain free and comfortable as possible.

[Roux]

It's so tough with fur babies. Especially cats. They hide the sickness so much more. Best thoughts and prayers to you and your baby

[refugee]

Hugs. We lost a beloved cat last week, belonging to our resident special needs adult. There were little clues that he was sick, but we didn't realize *how* sick until we took him to the vet to check out something odd he'd done. Even in his crate on the check-in counter, he was sitting up, looking alert and calm.

When he got back in the exam room (it was a vet hospital so they took him back without his owner and us, her support system), he collapsed (they told us in the room where they took us to tell us his options, all bad) and was struggling for breath. It's like he didn't have to put on a show for his person any longer, as if he didn't want to worry her. She loved him so much, and it was clear from their interactions that she was the world to him as well.

I'm sad today - one of our other cats is wandering the house, calling his special "Where are you, buddy?" call.

Hoping for all comfort for you and your furkid, and may you have many purrs and snuggles yet to come. I'm glad the sauteed raw food worked out. Our cats won't eat raw food, either. I thought liver would be a big treat for them, but it turned out I have to cook it or they won't eat it.

ETA: p.s. You're not really a horrible cat-mom. I'm sure of it, just from your description. I know you feel horrible, but once you've figured out a problem, you take steps to deal with it. You're doing the best you can, and I'd bet your cat knows she's very much loved.