Submissive Wives Guide to Marriage(TLC Special)

[jerkit]

Tara Furman wrote a blog post about the episode. She claims she is not sex obsessed and that was all TLC.

[Imrlgoddess]

I missed the show (dammit) but I loved the recap!

Had to show the husband her blog this morning and went through and read some of the comments below her mention of the show.

tarafurman.blogspot.com/2015/05/submissive-wives-guide-to-marriage.html?m=1

The fourth one down was pretty great. The woman basically calls out TLC for putting their lifestyle on the hotseat and sugarcoating the Stepford Wife-ness of it all. :popcorn2: :dance:

"That being said, I was really disappointed with this show. Maybe it was the editing, but I felt like it made submissive wives look like cartoon characters. I didn't feel like it was flattering, and felt like it perpetuated the Stepford Wife stereotype that I get thrown at me by unbelievers a lot. I don't think that has as much to do with you as it does TLC's production team. That channel seems to turn Christian culture into some sort of televised fetishism. "Oh, look at these people who don't kiss until they are married!" "Oh man, this family has more than 3 kids! CRAZY RIGHT?" and now "This lady submits to her husband. YOU'LL NEVER GUESS WHAT HAPPENS NEXT!""

(I don't know HTML so I don't know how to quote something without the handy quote button here)

edited for clarification

[Imrlgoddess]

Tara Furman wrote a blog post about the episode. She claims she is not sex obsessed and that was all TLC.

Reading through the blog post you mentioned...what is it with the women in this lifestyle that causes them to reduce men to simple machines that have no other needs or wants outside the bedroom??? I understood it from my moms p.o.v. years ago...she's a misogynist (can women be misogynists?) aka--she hates men-- resulting from some heinous activity of an uncle in her youth.

She would tell my sister and I that men cannot control themselves and all they look for is sex. Even now, in her older slightly "enlightened" years, she will still rant about young people who have no self control and have to have a "warm body". It has taken my sister and I years to understand that this ideal is completely false. Thank heaven for patient spouses with common sense. :|

[jerkit]

Reading through the blog post you mentioned...what is it with the women in this lifestyle that causes them to reduce men to simple machines that have no other needs or wants outside the bedroom??? I understood it from my moms p.o.v. years ago...she's a misogynist (can women be misogynists?) aka--she hates men-- resulting from some heinous activity of an uncle in her youth.

She would tell my sister and I that men cannot control themselves and all they look for is sex. Even now, in her older slightly "enlightened" years, she will still rant about young people who have no self control and have to have a "warm body". It has taken my sister and I years to understand that this ideal is completely false. Thank heaven for patient spouses with common sense. :|

I just don't know how to respond to the whole "men want sex, women don't, but you should anyways because Jesus" shtick anymore. I've tried on multiple occasions to explain that women like sex too, but it's just too far out of their limited scope of understanding.

[Coco]

Tara Furman wrote a blog post about the episode. She claims she is not sex obsessed and that was all TLC.

:lol: she forgot to read her "we own you" contract.

[Buzzard]

I watched it with my headship last night and we turned it off about halfway in. His response: Why does one person have to be in charge? People have talents and it has nothing to do with what's between your legs.

I love him.

[mair73]

Does anyone see where this will be aired again? I have checked on demand and the TLC site itself with no results. thanks.

[lilwriter85]

I posted this in the Lori thread. Lori "I'm a Godly Mentor Who Submits to My Husband" blogged about the show again.

lorialexander.blogspot.com/2015/05/submissive-wives-guide-to-marriage.html

TLC was bold to show this program. Tara Furman learned to submit to her husband, then her marriage improved dramatically. My favorite part of this program was watching the young woman who Tara was teaching to submit. At the beginning, Mark and Kristen were in a troubled marriage. Kristen stayed in bed while Mark got the children off to school and drove to work. She'd wake up resentful because the house was a mess. This was one unhappy couple on their way to divorce.

Tara mentors Kristen about being a submissive wife. Kristen decides she is going to give submission a try. She wakes up early, gets dressed, fixes her family breakfast and sends her husband off to work with a snack and a big hug. He's excited! She begins doing the laundry, catching up on her housework and fixing nice meals for her family. He brings home flowers to her. If Kristen continues on the submissive path, their marriage will not end in divorce!

There was a huge outcry against this show. Women came out in droves to protest it. Many said they would hate for their daughters to grow up to be a submissive wife and would no longer watch TLC. I guess they wouldn't want their daughters taking good care of their husbands and homes, then having their husbands fall madly in love with their daughters. Heaven forbid! This would just be terrible, in their minds.

Kristen is much happier with herself now that she is disciplined, kind and loving. A life of selfishness and living for ourselves produces pain and misery for everyone. Doing what we want, being lazy and selfish are NOT freedom as so many believe. This is being slaves to sin. Self-control is freedom, not bondage! God calls us to give ourselves away, serve others, be disciplined, have self-control and be kind; be servants of righteousness through the grace Jesus abundantly provides for us.

However, we should not be surprised at the firestorm against it. Satan is the prince of the power of the air and has blinded those who continually turn away from God and His ways "because that which may be known of God is manifest in them; for Gad has showed it unto them...when they knew God, they glorified him not as God, neither were thankful; but became vain in their imaginations, and their foolish heart was darkened. Professing themselves to be wise, they became fools" {Romans 1:19, 21, 22}.

As believers, we are responsible for being salt and light and spreading seeds of Truth wherever we have the opportunity to spread them. We are not responsible for what type of soil our seeds are falling upon, only that we sow the seeds. Who knows? There were probably some women who watched this program and thought they just may give submission a try since they have nothing to lose and everything to gain! Many marriages have been saved when the wife stops expecting their husbands to make them happy and instead decides to do everything they can to make their husbands happy.

[Handmaiden of Dog]

There is such a vast difference between being a helpful spouse and a doormat. If the wife is lazing around in bed all day and complaining about what a mess her house is in while the husband works all day, then, yes, something needs to change. Either she needs to go to her doctor to check on her depression/thyroid/sleeping sickness or she needs to realize she is one half of the mother-father duo in charge of this family and start pulling her weight.

On the other hand making yourself available to your husband whenever he decides he wants sex and deferring to him in all decisions isn't the way to handle an adult relationship either. In that scenario the wife is reducing herself to the role of child and placing the husband in the role of sole parent. Turning yourself into a child is not helpful, it just makes your husband's burdens more onerous because you are putting everything on his shoulders.

I've been thinking about this a lot lately, wondering why so many modern Christians are trying to force women into a submissive role. I think that they are selling Christianity as a power trip to men, thereby increasing the membership of the Biblical Patriarchy.

[eri]

There are actually some FJers who are pretty adamant about women being submissive to their husbands because of religious preference.

I don't know why those people are here, but it certainly makes for interesting passive-aggressive drama in this thread. XD

[FloraKitty35]

There's a difference between being occasionally submissive on the part of either partner in an appropriate manner (such as talking over a problem and reaching the most beneficial solution for ALL parties involved) and being a brainwashed doormat.

[rosaline]

It makes me sick to my stomach that TLC would show this. Lori Alexander being so complementary of it makes it so obviously gross.