Arranged: new tv show

[Sundaymorning]

It this show even legal? :pink-shock:

[NotALoserLikeYou]

One of the couples wasnt really arranged, another couple is Indian and they are consenting adults, and this gypsy couple, well its legal because the girl consented to the marriage. Or "consented"

[lillybeth]

I'm watching the second episode now.

It's so heart breaking :(

[Burris]

Arranged marriage - I think it can work out if the thing occurs between matured people who have already developed their own lives.

I've never been shy about explaining the origin of my happy marriage: The word "marriage" came up on a first meeting during which there seemed to be little in the way of chemistry between my then-future husband and me.

My mother's response when I went back to her that night with my comment on chemistry was that I should phone the man to reassure him since it was likely he'd end up my husband.

The compact was legitimate by even the most fundified standards: Our fathers - and I do not at all get along with mine, and nor did/does he live at all near; he had to travel for this - were the ones who signed as the sole witnesses on our initial marriage licence - a court document that legalized the compact.

My husband was (and is) even the only person I've ever kissed let alone been on intimate terms. I had long seen the "misbehaviour" of some men and had decided early on - a belief reinforced to the point of iron solidity in my late teens - that so long as I had a choice in the matter there'd be ridiculously high standards for whatever man got near me. In fact, I was happy with the idea of lifelong celibacy.

My husband now hates the characterization of the compact as a flat and formal business arrangement, because we love each other and haven't seen each other merely as business associates in "forever." But that is still basically what happened: We met, made a bargain, and developed the contract that stipulated what each of us would offer and for how long.

Eventually the offers became "everything" and the length became life. Neither of us regrets it.

But we've talked about how the compact would he turned out if I had signed it at, say, age 21 instead of some years older (and so my husband would have been a young man as well). Given our temperaments at those ages, we probably would have kept to our agreement only for so long as required: At 21, I was so misanthropic that most people knew to avoid me by sight. My husband claims to have been insufferably arrogant at that age.

We both concluded if the right people marry at the wrong time, it may be as bad as the wrong people marrying at any time.

[lawlifelgbt]

Sounds interesting! My best friend since we were kids moved from Pakistan when she was 4, and she has an arranged marriage. But no way would she just meet him at the wedding! Instead, her parents gave her names/bio/photos on about 5-6 guys, and she picked one from there. IIRC, they really do like each other, though they fight sometimes, and from what I've seen (talked to him when I skype her, proofread some materials for his citizenship paperwork), he is a kind person. Age gap is there, but not huge, 4-5 years.

I still think it's weird though, because a lot of the process seems to involve her parents' wants and goals, e.g. "We want [friend] to marry a well-off doctor" rather than what she wants.

[FundieliciousTaterTot]

Sounds interesting! My best friend since we were kids moved from Pakistan when she was 4, and she has an arranged marriage. But no way would she just meet him at the wedding! Instead, her parents gave her names/bio/photos on about 5-6 guys, and she picked one from there. IIRC, they really do like each other, though they fight sometimes, and from what I've seen (talked to him when I skype her, proofread some materials for his citizenship paperwork), he is a kind person. Age gap is there, but not huge, 4-5 years.

I still think it's weird though, because a lot of the process seems to involve her parents' wants and goals, e.g. "We want [friend] to marry a well-off doctor" rather than what she wants.

My friend wants an arranged marriage and his main concerns are the girl's job, social status, education, salary, drinking/smoking habits, languages known, and of course looks. Once someone passes that test he talks to them and if they seem too dumb he isn't interested. If he ever finds someone suitable he will get his parents to call her parents and seal the deal. So far personality isn't on his list despite my prodding. The most important thing is her job [emoji57]

I keep telling him he should date around and see what personalities he likes, not to worry about if their job is suitable, but he is dead-set on his plan and says he can make it work.

Different world to me!

[Jana814]

I'm watching the second episode now.

It's so heart breaking :(

I saw that episode, it was heart breaking.

[divadivine]

Thank goodness someone finally posted on this show! I wasn't sure where it should be posted, so I held off. I watched the first two episodes last week when I was sick & couldn't sleep because all I did for hours was cough. I watched episode 3 Wednesday on DVR. It's my new guilty pleasure.

I feel sorry for Maria. Christian is an ass. He orders her around like a servant. I can't wait for this week's episode.

I couldn't believe the way Lisa ( southern momma) treated Meghan before the wedding. She's a bitch. You don't tell another women "I guess this means no doughnuts this afternoon. Only salads until your wedding." And the whole dance thing at the reception. The dress she was wearing was not appropriate for the mother of the groom. Sorry, it was tacky. It was the bride & groom's day.... Not the Mother of the Groom. I really wanted to reach through the tv and slap her several times.

[veron1que]

Thank goodness someone finally posted on this show! I wasn't sure where it should be posted, so I held off. I watched the first two episodes last week when I was sick & couldn't sleep because all I did for hours was cough. I watched episode 3 Wednesday on DVR. It's my new guilty pleasure.

I feel sorry for Maria. Christian is an ass. He orders her around like a servant. I can't wait for this week's episode.

I couldn't believe the way Lisa ( southern momma) treated Meghan before the wedding. She's a bitch. You don't tell another women "I guess this means no doughnuts this afternoon. Only salads until your wedding." And the whole dance thing at the reception. The dress she was wearing was not appropriate for the mother of the groom. Sorry, it was tacky. It was the bride & groom's day.... Not the Mother of the Groom. I really wanted to reach through the tv and slap her several times.

Lisa is a nut! The dance was rediculous. I am so not a southern woman, I could never hold my tongue so much!

I'm studying for finals now, but the new episode is up. I can't wait to watch because it looks like Maria left! Good for her tbh.

[Jana814]

I feel so bad about Maria. I'm not going to say what happened on yesterday's episode in case others haven't see it yet.

[SallyDraper]

I watch the show. Most of the episodes, are on the FYI website.

[countressrascal]

I have an arranged marriage-we have been married for 49 years this August. Three grown sons , 7 grandchildren later I think we are just as happy as any married couples, had our high and lows more highs. In my personal opinion I think we did not expect that every day was going to be perfect and rolled with the punches, there were no wild expectations between us. The only thing we both wanted was that- Count would make it through Med School and residency and I would become a Nurse Midwife, both happened. We did know each other prior to the Shadchan (match maker) introducing us. Unlike the ones that are on this show we were not coerced into the relationship, we figured it out on our own. It was the right time but neither one of us had time to seek each other out, so it became arranged. I know the only disappointment is on the Count's side of the family, we did not return to the Orthodox Jewish life. Life goes on

[RosyDaisy]

Lisa is a nut! The dance was rediculous. I am so not a southern woman, I could never hold my tongue so much!

I'm a southern woman. True southern women never hold their tongues and are very opinionated.

[Snarkaluffagus]

I'm a southern woman. True southern women never hold their tongues and are very opinionated.

This, good lord, yes.