Boy/Girl Friendships

[Kitty]

Do these even exist in Fundie-land?

Given how strictly both sexes are controlled, how they're segregated, and how courtship works (no kissing till marriage? really? wtf), it seems like a platonic friendship between members of the opposite sex is impossible.

But for ATI families with all their conferences, surely fundie kids meet others of the opposite sex and enjoy their company?

I dunno what made me wonder about this, but would boy/girl friendships be allowed? Would they be even more tightly controlled than friendships between people of the same sex? Or are fundies that afraid of sex?

[GenerationCedarchip]

Boy/Girl friendships were actually encouraged in my old fundie church. However, it was generally in the sense of being friendly either with families that socialized together or with boys and girls hanging out in a group. Spending lots of one on one time with someone of the opposite sex where you can't readily be observed by others is a big no-no. In both the high school and college groups at my church(forbidding college for girls still not big with most reform fundies though they are VERY careful where their daughters go to school), there were always sex-segregated Bible studies but then we all got together for social events.

[Extricated]

The group I grew up in wasn't ATI but it was bad bad news to be friends with a boy. Girls could say hello only if it was rude not to. Girls caught casually chatting with boys on several occasions were usually grabbed by an older woman to "see what some of the girls are up to" and her parents called later in the week. If her parents didn't do anything about it the family was usually ignored by all of the other families until they made her stop or left the church. I never spoke to my husband at all until we began courting and that was expected and normal. If a family with girls was invited to the home of a family with only boys then the girls stayed with the parents all day.

It's hard to recover from too. Even now I cringe when my pastor pats me on the shoulder and says "Good to see you this morning." because I wonder what everyone else is thinking. I forget that normal people don't care.

[Boogalou]

Since all these mega families claim that their children are best friends with eachother I would think so. But outside of families? Definately not. Just looking through all of the Duggar photos this afternoon there are hardly any shots of males and females of the same age together unless it is in a rather large group.