Hellena launches her ebook

[lilith]

So much for the new economy, she wants $20 for her 89 pages, $25 for the book on a USB stick in a crocheted pouch (no info on whether she will have birthed or fucked on said pouch).

[terranova]

I'm not buying it unless she will tell me how to dread my pubes.

[lilith]

I'm not buying it unless she will tell me how to dread my pubes.

I'm sure she'll dread it for you and weave hand spun fibre into it (see post about visitors and the extensions she's put in their dreads)

[happy atheist]

Hey Lilith, do you think Curious would let us expense this? :shifty-kitty:

[Blahblah]

Someone better take one for the team and slog their way through this. :anyone: (bags not me, I value my sanity too much).

I'm assuming there has been no editor involved so it will be chock full of word-vomit and extraneous adjectives.

Frankly I'm amazed she's kept it down to only 89 pages.

Does it have pictures? :pink-shock:

[blisterine]

Someone better take one for the team and slog their way through this. :anyone: (bags not me, I value my sanity too much).

I'm assuming there has been no editor involved so it will be chock full of word-vomit and extraneous adjectives.

Frankly I'm amazed she's kept it down to only 89 pages.

Does it have pictures? :pink-shock:

But if it were a real book, the pages would be crocheted pubes or silk-screened leaves, or some shit like that.

I volunteer to take it for the team, if FJ can pay for it to go on my Kindle. But at 89 pages, we can probably "peek inside" and get the gist of it- fuck, crochet, fuck, don't bathe, work on dreads, fuck, spin pubes into yarn for a vest, birth something, fuck, repeat. That will be $20 please!

[formergothardite]

Somebody needs to read and review this. :lol: I can barely make it through her blog posts so I don't think I would be a good candidate. I really want the USB stick in a crocheted pouch. Perhaps I should ask my husband to get it for me for Christmas?

[ILoveJellybeans]

Somebody needs to read and review this. :lol: I can barely make it through her blog posts so I don't think I would be a good candidate. I really want the USB stick in a crocheted pouch. Perhaps I should ask my husband to get it for me for Christmas?

Only if you can accept the likelihood of the crocheted pouch being crocheted from Currawong's pubes.

[It'sFunToRun]

So much for the new economy, she wants $20 for her 89 pages, $25 for the book on a USB stick in a crocheted pouch (no info on whether she will have birthed or fucked on said pouch).

Seriously, $25 for something that someone probably fucked on is pretty cheap. You're getting a deal.

[lilith]

Hey Lilith, do you think Curious would let us expense this? :shifty-kitty:

I'll share reviewing duties with you if she will.

Alecto wanted iPads - all we want is a hand woven and dyed pouch, possibly soaked in assorted bodily fluids, containing the quantum physical rantings of a modern day eccentric humanimal creatrix.

[happy atheist]

I'll share reviewing duties with you if she will.

Alecto wanted iPads - all we want is a hand woven and dyed pouch, possibly soaked in assorted bodily fluids, containing the quantum physical rantings of a modern day eccentric humanimal creatrix.

Is that so wrong?

[keen23]

Is that so wrong?

if it is wrong, I don't want to be right.

[Grimalkin]

Someone better take one for the team and slog their way through this. :anyone: (bags not me, I value my sanity too much).

I'm assuming there has been no editor involved so it will be chock full of word-vomit and extraneous adjectives.

Frankly I'm amazed she's kept it down to only 89 pages.

Does it have pictures? :pink-shock:

Are you kidding? It probley is just one paragraph, single spaced with small type. Pictures Ha!

The whole fucked on or birthed on debate made me laugh. Thank you for that.

[DGayle]

Who is this lady?

[keen23]

Who is this lady?

Hellena Post and her lifemate Currawong are friends of Lauren, and pretty out there themselves.

Here's a long discussion about them: viewtopic.php?f=81&t=12399&hilit=meet+hellena

Hellena is particularly infamous here, due to her birthing story of twins where she allegedly had sex with Currawong between deliveries (that story has since been amended to being "just a blow job")

Hellena is very natural, and brags about her lusty, musky smell.

[lilith]

Are you kidding? It probley is just one paragraph, single spaced with small type. Pictures Ha!

The whole fucked on or birthed on debate made me laugh. Thank you for that.

There are pictures, and the descriptions for them are what padded it out to the current length. She only finished the final edits and formatting the night before the launch.

I too am very surprised that she kept it to 89 pages. Succinct our Hellenna is not, in fact she and Happy Atheists are polar opposites in verbosity (and probably in many other areas - I'm guessing Mr HA isn't a big fan of mid labour sex and drumming circles, though I'm happy to be corrected on this if my bourgeois assumptions are wrong).

[happy atheist]

I don't think Mr HA is against drumming circles, but he's never participated in one. Birthin' sex he's definitely opposed to.

And I think I'm cool with being the polar opposite of Hellena, at least in some regards.

[happy atheist]

You can get her other book on Etsy, too. It's only $10.

https://www.etsy.com/au/listing/1801237 ... p-header-1

[lilith]

You can get her other book on Etsy, too. It's only $10.

https://www.etsy.com/au/listing/1801237 ... p-header-1

She published that in instalments on her blog - I'm not sure if its still there. But I found it unreadable - and I'll read almost anything. It's just so densely wordy and pretentious.

[Mary C Doates]

I'm waiting for the hard copy of the book, crafted from crocheted pubic hair, dried placenta, and compost. It's lovingly packaged in its own hazmat suit.

[Blahblah]

Slightly off topic but Hellena's toxic ex-midwife friend Lisa Barrett is in court again in a new coroner's investigation into the death of a twin at a home delivery she presided over after being deregistered for previous similar cases.

Lisa was the midwife for Hellena's twin birth in which she allowed a delay of many many hours between twins and stated that this is "completely normal".

Haven't linked the current stuff. If anyone is interested just Google Lisa Barrett and coroner.

[chaotic life]

I've known a lot of midwives in my day and their infant mortality rates are typically SO low that even one infant death would shake them. How big of a sociopath do you have to be to have repetitive, persistent infant deaths due to your own incompetency and continue to violate the law and deliver babies?

It's not like she is part of the unregulated, underground network of lay midwifery in the US. She was an Australian midwife, which means she was accepted under a highly competitive admission process, did two years of nurses' training at university and then completed the rigorous midwifery training.

I don't see how you can produce a midwife that callous and incompetent on accident. Which all leads me to wonder if she's an Angel of mercy killer and deliberately killing babies by acting incompetent.

And Hellena adores her and defends her.

[It'sFunToRun]

I've known a lot of midwives in my day and their infant mortality rates are typically SO low that even one infant death would shake them. How big of a sociopath do you have to be to have repetitive, persistent infant deaths due to your own incompetency and continue to violate the law and deliver babies?

It's not like she is part of the unregulated, underground network of lay midwifery in the US. She was an Australian midwife, which means she was accepted under a highly competitive admission process, did two years of nurses' training at university and then completed the rigorous midwifery training.

I don't see how you can produce a midwife that callous and incompetent on accident. Which all leads me to wonder if she's an Angel of mercy killer and deliberately killing babies by acting incompetent.

And Hellena adores her and defends her.

My impression of Hellena is that despite how much she talks about being her own person and not caring about what people think about her, she still has a weakness about confronting people, asking hard questions, and saying "no" when necessary. It's kinda paradoxical that someone who has no problem telling people about her own body odors wouldn't be able to tell someone "no, you're only pretending to be my friend and you're taking advantage of me", but that's how some people work.

Lisa Barrett sounds like a shitty midwife, but she happened to be good for Hellena's particular birth (meaning that the results were good), and I think Hellena is a very loyal person.

[Terrie]

Isn't she one of those champions of the mother's "birth experience" defining success instead of, you know, having a baby at the end of the process?

[happy atheist]

There is a small subset of women who want to be totally in charge of the birthing process, no matter what the outcome. To them, having the "perfect birth experience" is the only thing that matters. For me, having a living baby at the end was part of what made my births perfect, but what do I know? These women believe that any intervention is interfering with their bodily autonomy. I suspect that's the sort of person who hires Lisa Barrett these days. Google "birth rape" if you want to read more about these people.