Maxwell relatives, but who are they?

[kpmom]

Sarah's got a new post up about spending time with an aunt and uncle while on the road, but she fails to say which side of the family they are from.

 

Is this Steve's sister who lives near their mother? Or is it Steve's brother who has Easter egg hunts? And are the others at the table cousins? Neither the aunt or uncle look like Teri, so I'm assuming they are Steve's people.

 

Geez Sarah, you give us every detail of your Costco run, but nothing here whatsoever.

[lilwriter85]

My guess is that Sarah and her siblings might not know a whole lot about the relatives that they spent time with. I do have to wonder about the feelings of a lot of Steve and Teri's relatives when they visit/meet up with them. I bet the relatives walk on egg shells around Steve.

[gardenvarietycitizen]

Judging from the ages, the non-immediate family at the table have to be the aunt and uncle pair (which side I don't know either) and then their adult son (the cousin) and his wife.

They slept in a Wal-Mart parking lot in Litchfield, drove, spent the 8th quietly with family (presumably the previous post with the fall leaves was taken at the relative's house, after they drove there from Litchfield) and they're doing a conference in the Quad Cities tonight (10/9). So it's some house in the burbs somewhere in western IL (between Litchfield and the Tampico), they hung out there on 10/8.

I don't know if we've ever heard where Easter Bunny Bro lives?

[SisiL78]

For starters I'm pretty sure in another Maxwell thread several people made comments regarding the lack of involvement in the "children's" lives from extended family and VOILA! they mention and aunt and uncle. Poor Aunt and Uncle, they were forced into special family bible time. Ugh. ANd ya, nothing about the family except what they made for dinner? How about "My aunt who is a lovely woman and crocheted this afghan" or something. A tiny teency bit of personal information? I can come up with that five minutes after meeting someone. After spending the weekend there you'd think that they could have learned SOMETHING about their family.

The woman (aunt?) Terri is in the photo with has the same nose as Terri. So my guess is Terri's sister? Then again I suck at guessing familial relations via looks.

Anyhoo, I find the awkward pose weird and cold. And the only other photo involving the family is the one of them all at the table eating. They are visiting family and take photos of just themselves posing in the kitchen? And a photo of Steve cutting hair and Sarah ironing. Seriously? You'd think they'd post more photos including family and perhaps. Will this family ever post something that makes me think that they are actually human?

[Jana814]

My guess is that Sarah and her siblings might not know a whole lot about the relatives that they spent time with. I do have to wonder about the feelings of a lot of Steve and Teri's relatives when they visit/meet up with them. I bet the relatives walk on egg shells around Steve.

I have to agree with you. I do not know what I would do if I have a relative like Steve, besides wanted to run for the hills whenever he was around. Maybe some of their devoted followers will asked who they are and Sarah will answer them. They looked preatty normal to me.

[Sola]

Hi Steve

Now let's see if this works too; Steve Maxwell (is a tool) will never find Sarah Maxwell a husband.

[SisiL78]

Hi Steve

Now let's see if this works too; Steve Maxwell (is a tool) will never find Sarah Maxwell a husband.

:clap:

[OkToBeTakei]

Hi Steve

Now let's see if this works too; Steve Maxwell (is a tool) will never find Sarah Maxwell a husband.

Hahaha!

They are relative no names. They were on the schedule as:

DAY 10. Stop to do laundry, ironing and haircutting.

[lilwriter85]

I have to agree with you. I do not know what I would do if I have a relative like Steve, besides wanted to run for the hills whenever he was around. Maybe some of their devoted followers will asked who they are and Sarah will answer them. They looked preatty normal to me.

Even if one of the devoted followers asked, I could see the Maxwells not answering the question. The relatives of Steve and Terri probably do their best to be pleasant to them, but I can see them easily being annoyed by the holier than thou attitudes. The Maxwells are extremely isolated and the relatives might not know about to what to talk to them about. Movies, sports, TV, news events, or talking about books(unless they are Maxwell books) are all out for discussion topics. Maybe the female relatives talk about sewing with Teri and the girls. The male relatives probably talk about construction or maybe computers with the boys.

[ncb]

I think this is Steve's sister. We have seen pics of Terri's sister before and she looks more like Terri. I am sure the family walks on egg shells around Steve for the sake of the "children" so that he doesn't cut off what little contact they still have with extended family. They have said in the past that they closely monitor the "children" when they are with extended family because that family could be a bad influence.

On another note, anyone curious as to whether or not Christopher and Nathan are throwing ragers Steve's basement while they are all gone for so long? ;)

[Deleted03]

Hi Steve

Now let's see if this works too; Steve Maxwell (is a tool) will never find Sarah Maxwell a husband.

Steve Maxwell never make any effort to find his daughter Sarah a husband. And Laziness is unchristian.

[gustava]

Food was served on very fashionable SQUARE plates, with a separate little bowl for the fruit. Steve must not have approved of such idolatry. And whoever they are, the side hug with Terri and the woman was definitely awkward, especially if they are sisters. Even if just SIL's, the body language says they are not close, don't want to be close, go away please.

[uncreative]

It seems so weird, too, that they're seated by family (if that makes sense). The heathen family is all on one corner of the table while the Maxwells are on the other corner and sides. It might just be my family, but when we have dinner with other people my kids always want to sit by their cousins/cool aunt/friend. They don't want to be anywhere near me or my husband. What's the point of visiting if you're just going to talk to the people you came with? Crazy, tool-y Steve.

[Black Aliss]

Food was served on very fashionable SQUARE plates, with a separate little bowl for the fruit.

And no Red Solo Cups! Can't you just picture the Maxwell men singing softly to themselves across the table from the the uncle and cousin:

Now a red solo cup is the best receptacle

For barbecues, tailgates, fairs and festivals

And you, sir, do not have a pair of testicles

If you prefer drinking from glass

[gardenvarietycitizen]

It seems so weird, too, that they're seated by family (if that makes sense). The heathen family is all on one corner of the table while the Maxwells are on the other corner and sides. It might just be my family, but when we have dinner with other people my kids always want to sit by their cousins/cool aunt/friend. They don't want to be anywhere near me or my husband. What's the point of visiting if you're just going to talk to the people you came with? Crazy, tool-y Steve.

This too - granted there are no young kids in that family, but I know when I visit relatives all the kids want to sit next to the aunt they don't see very often!

[WonderingInWA]

I thought the same thing - pictures of a bowl of fruit salad and of Sarah ironing and that unfortunate pose of Teri and the female relative -- very bizarre. I think Sarah tries to make blog posts that make them look like they do normal everyday things, but the Maxwells will never be normal or everyday, ever.

[Bookworm89]

This too - granted there are no young kids in that family, but I know when I visit relatives all the kids want to sit next to the aunt they don't see very often!

Very true about kids wanting to sit by people other than their parents. I am enjoying the time I spend with my nephews and niece because it is always interesting to see who gets to sit beside me (A healthy argument normally happens between my nephews, its cute to watch). They seem to think I'm "cool" (which I am not) so I am enjoying it while they are young.

[Katydid]

Hi Steve

Now let's see if this works too; Steve Maxwell (is a tool) will never find Sarah Maxwell a husband.

:pray: Here's hoping!

I mean, even the PEARLS talk about the "cloistered homeschool family" and thinks kids need to get married. In another article, she even says that at 20, a woman becomes an adult and can begin to make her own decisions!

nogreaterjoy.org/articles/cloistered-homeschool-syndrome/

[Justme]

I'm pretty sure it's not Teri's sister, Aunt Tami. I've seen pictures before and the woman doesn't look anything like her. The man on the patio with one of the reversal boys is the spitting image of Stevie (is a tool).

[bananacat]

As sad as Sarah's life is, I don't wish Steve-approved marriage for her. It would be worse for her, and I also don't feel enthusiastic about bringing any more innocent children into this lifestyle. If Sarah never escapes, I hope she never marries.

[fundiefan]

If I were their relatives I most certainly would not invite them to my house. One, wouldn't be able to tolerate them. Two, I wouldn't put myself in the position being used. They're on a road trip, need washers and dryers and a 'home base' for a day or so; they blow in, eat your food (which they probably didn't contribute a thing towards), use your appliances and home; then use you to put pictures on their blog. Then, boom. Gone. Not even a Christmas card.

[gustava]

If I were their relatives I most certainly would not invite them to my house. One, wouldn't be able to tolerate them. Two, I wouldn't put myself in the position being used. They're on a road trip, need washers and dryers and a 'home base' for a day or so; they blow in, eat your food (which they probably didn't contribute a thing towards), use your appliances and home; then use you to put pictures on their blog. Then, boom. Gone. Not even a Christmas card.

I definitely would, to keep open even a very frayed family line for the Maxwell offspring.

[Guest Anonymous]

If I were their relatives I most certainly would not invite them to my house. One, wouldn't be able to tolerate them. Two, I wouldn't put myself in the position being used. They're on a road trip, need washers and dryers and a 'home base' for a day or so; they blow in, eat your food (which they probably didn't contribute a thing towards), use your appliances and home; then use you to put pictures on their blog. Then, boom. Gone. Not even a Christmas card.

I think this is grossly unfair. Obviously your heathen soul would be remembered in prayer at the Great New Year's Eve Wailing Wall.

Something to think about. :whistle:

[tressea]

I mean, even the PEARLS talk about the "cloistered homeschool family" and thinks kids need to get married. In another article, she even says that at 20, a woman becomes an adult and can begin to make her own decisions!

nogreaterjoy.org/articles/cloistered-homeschool-syndrome/

It makes me want to throw up and then go boil my brain to agree with the Pearls on ANYTHING, but I really think they hit the nail on the head with this article. I want to print it out, highlight the entire thing, and send it to Steve. Take this paragraph:

It is now become a disease of epic proportions. We call them PDFs, Patriarchal Dysfunctional Families. The children are treated as permanent property of the parents. If they don’t marry, and many of them never have the opportunity, they remain at home as a sort of indentured servant, never rising to the status of an adult, always under authority of the head of the clan, the Patriarch Daddy. Don’t snicker. A lot of kids are hurting . . . Daughter sits at home serving the younger children and doing Mama’s chores—waiting for God’s choice. Daddy and Mama hold their merchandise guardedly, waiting for a buyer who never comes.

YES. This strikes me as spot on and an excellent summary of what it is that we harp on so much on this board. And then there's this:

"What is pitiful is the whole process is done in hopes of getting the perfect will of God, but one vital ingredient is missing—encouraging your children to become responsible, autonomous, well educated, and experienced adults as soon as possible. You should have trained your sons to be men by the time they are fifteen, independent by the time they are eighteen. Your daughters should be capable of living apart from the family by the time they are eighteen and should be allowed to make their own life’s decisions somewhere between the ages of eighteen and twenty. Unmarried, grown (18 years old) children may remain at home; it is good if they do; but the parent-child relationship should evolve into an adult-adult relationship by the time they are sixteen to eighteen years old. Parents should have earned the right to give advice, and kids should have grown in wisdom enough to ask for it. But a parent should never invoke his parental authority on a grown kid. It is demeaning to both and akin to not being potty trained."

While I may disagree with a bit that kids should be autonomous by the time they're 18, I think they're right on the money with this paragraph, too. The Maxwells have infantilized their children. It's why their blog seems so stilted and devoid of any meaning... they have adult children writing posts that feel a lot like "What I Did On My Summer Vacation" essays by 10-year-olds. Not thoughtful, substantive, independent thought from an adult daughter.

Again, it KILLS me to agree with the Pearls who I think are incredibly pernicious in their advocacy of shocking child abuse, but I think they've pegged Steve Maxwell to a tee.

[Witsec7]

Steve can only tell his daughter how to post his perceptions of how their family interacts and lives. He's dulled his own memory. Like Josh and Anna, he merely posts to market a brand. He has no real time references and has forbidden them to his family. They all really believe this is the sum total of life within a family and a trip to Costco is really exciting. Steve has a family that models his ideal, it has none of the healthy interaction or behaviors of folks involved in actually living life. It's as if it is all merely a pastime until one meets their rewards, in His Name. Their devolution is obvious to outsiders who have a comparator. I say this because Tits2 was the first QF blog I ever read many years ago and I've seen both the parents ratchet down their children's lives and experiences.

I compared their dinner photos with relatives, to those of my own. My family affairs are raucous, loud, a cacophony that accompanies endless family favorites being passed around a table or tables. And yes, there are discussions, fights, and flipping of coins to determine who get's to sit where. And no, most often the photographers are far too busy interacting, eating and drinking to capture moments at the table. Yes the mundane happens when we visit, laundry must get done, but it is not important or significant enough to memorialize on film for people around the world to see. Women in the kitchen dancing and cooking to Motown is what becomes a treasured snap, not an adult father cutting an adult child's hair (we're kinda upscale, we pay for folks to cut our hair :D ).