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Day in the Life of a SAHD


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I think we discussed this on the old forum. I actually adore the Brookshire girls, but I can't ignore that this reads like what I do on my "day off". Also, while re-reading this I noticed the obvious dependance on someone else, here, the father. In all the comments praising the post, women are saying they want their daughters to be like this. I just can't help it, I hate the idea of raising someone to rely on someone else. Granted these people cherish the idea that a woman is a "help-meet" and therefore a man will provide for her, obv. It just makes me sad to think that this talented girl is at home, cooking and cleaning, when she's so talented. Also, I can't help but think that she sounds... *gulp*, lazy? We all need to vacuum and make dinner, yet she talks about it as though it's a huge daily achievement?

raisinghomemakers.com/2011/a-day-in-the-life-of-a-stay-at-home-daughter/

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I've said it before, and I'll say it again: there is absolutely nothing "visionary" about being a sponge!

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She sure can draw. Her work is really charming and delightful. She could have a very great career in illustration, I would think.

I agree.

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I agree.

I think so, too. Imagine if she'd been allowed to go to a good art school or university with a great art school. Bet she'd have gone far.

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To me, that post reads like what some of my SAHM friends post on Facebook all day long. I'm not knocking them for being SAHMs, or implying that they have nothing better to do than spend their days of Facebook, but they'll post things like, "Getting the girls ready for school today!" and I'm like, "Yeah, presumably you do that every day. Why do you need to tell us all about it?" But I guess that's the point of Facebook. Anyway, I'm going off on a tangent.

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i wouldnt want my adult children living with me...and i really wouldnt want my daughter acting like some sort of secondary wife to her dad..thats weird! i love my one and only girl to pieces but everyone has to leave the nest eventually.

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My mornings begin about 6:30am when Bently (our dog) sneezes to let me know he needs let out. Daddy’s workday begins at 7:00, and before he leaves he reads to us from the Psalms and prays with us. I love my Daddy!

I'm gonna need a shot of insulin before I read any further. Is this is an adult woman, writing in what she thinks is her daughters voice? To an 8 year old audience??

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I remember this discussion. She's talented and has some kind of ambition, actually. I guess she's lucky to have a skill she can pursue from home. And I remember the "I love my daddy" line that I wouldn't expect from someone over 10.

And indeed, I still don't see how being a SAHD is so incopatible with doing *something* . Couldn't they get some job or qualification even just as a way to prepare them to be a wife and mother (like the women who used to go for child education in the 50s or 60s)? Or do some volunteer work and actually, you know, help someone according to Christian duty?

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They REST in the afternoon? WTF from, exactly? They haven't DONE anything. I mean, how exhausting is cleaning up a kitchen? And the I Love My Daddy. I can't even.

Homemaking is not 'an art.' No one is churning the butter anymore, ladies. It isn't the turn of the century, no matter how much you relish the 'Good Old Days.' Why not say what you're doing? You're running home businesses and you're sitting around trying to stretch out the three bags of groceries because you have no money because you're way too delicate and holy and blessed and all to GO OUT INTO THE WORKPLACE. But these women ARE working, they aren't professional homemakers. Kelly @ GC has let slip that her husband has been out of work for years now. She obviously supports them.

Clearly, the adult daughters are company for a bored mother. End of story.

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This reminds me what an American Studies class I once took explained: until the 1950s or so, women who stayed at home actually worked-by doing laundry by hand, canning, making soap, making candles, etc. Then with the new technological appliances a lot of that disappeared, and being a woman at home became all about building some kind of magical shrine to domesticity-hence the 50s housewife. It seems they're basically doing that, and trying to claim it's "biblical".

Oh and have you seen the response to "Daughter of King" in the comments. Ok, Breezy reacted in a very civil way which is more than can be said by many fundies who receive even very slight criticisms, but basically the whole SAHD lifestyle is literally based on a few Bible lines which surely stress the importance of being a wife and mother for a woman, but don't seem to boil down to "you must be locked at home thinking of nothing but diapers and detergent" as they interpret it. The Proverb 31 woman looks like an active businesswoman, actually.

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They're cramming all of their time off into the few short years between graduation from SODRT and the beginning of sprog-production. Lord knows they won't be getting any time off for the next twenty years-it'll be continuous pregnancies, parenting, homeschooling and being a perfect keeper-at-home all the way. If they're lucky, they might have husband who's capable of running the occasional load of laundry. If they're REALLY lucky, he might not mind being reminded to pick up a take-away pizza occasionally.

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I agree that she is talented at art. The post is kind-of sad... her favorite afternoons are spent discussing the good character qualities of families?

I did some creeping and saw this comment on her blog post about children's books (abowlofmossandpebbles.com/?p=4653 - decent basic outline but she forgot most publishers want you to have an agent):

You mean… it *is* godly for a young stay at home daughter wanting to be married and have children for the glory of God to write a children’s story? If it’s done for God’s glory? Assuming you’re NOT wasting time for that in other areas?

Wow. Someone told me it was a waste of time and that I should be sewing instead of writing… and… my dream had been to write a story for my future kids and illustrate it.

I’ve never heard anyone else besides me say it was *good* to do something like this, even God glorifying. I had been told that it wasn’t glorifying to God and nothing I did could glorify God…

Thanks for this post!! :) I’ve written for seven years and I feel like my characters (the same ones for seven years) are my little friends, and I can’t wait to give the story to my future kids and say: ‘here you go, sweeties, I wrote this just. for. YOU.’ :) Even if no-one else ever reads it or enjoys it!

Thank you for this awesome post! :)

I have to say, I am glad she is able to pursue her interests now (of course I hope she could get out so she could continue that interest) and I was pleased to see she made a positive impact on another fundy girl, who was being discouraged from writing a story for her children??? How harmless can you get? Of course creativity is probably the work of the devil because it requires original thought...

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Yeah, and why is sewing so much better than writing? Obviously it's perfectly fine to sew, but it's not like it's a vital skill today, not to mention the two aren't incompatible. But god forbidden a female ever uses her intellect. I wonder if a fundie boy would be told he needs to be doing woodwork instead of writing (though some might, perhaps).

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Words fail me. I'll post a link instead.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Lk-1iMPUkg&list=FLMg9_ncO-XIDks614hR6p8Q&index=13&feature=plpp_video

How do I embed a video? It didn't work when I tried the youtube-button and pasted the url of the video in it.

You don't paste the whole URL, just the string of numbers and letters at the end of the web address.

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I'm not implying she's not using her time to pursue her art wisely. It must be nice to have that security blanket and a few years to enjoy herself at home. What I'm saying is that I dislike the SAHDs trying to sound like they are doing so much when in reality they are doing little more than most of us do on a daily basis. Wow? You prayed before starting your day? I did too. You answered e-mails? I did too. You made a few pairs of earrings for your Etsy shop which probably makes $90 a month, tops. I did too, although as it is a hobby, I did it after work. You baked muffins from scratch? Great. We still have some left from my day off, when I baked for the freezer. Besides, my husband (and the SAHDs' dads) probably don't need fresh baked goods on a daily basis.

It's like Lina where she points out she's up with the sun. Really? I was up before the sun and on my way to work. Now, am I resentful? No! I love coming home having fulfilled a purpose, having helped people. But when I have a day off and I'm lazy, puttering around the Thrift Store looking for a deal and making homemade pita bread while listening to Josh Groban on my computer, I do NOT try to pass it off as having have a full day, doing God's work.

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What's going to happen to these girls when they go from sharing the work of a household with only adults in it, to managing alone a household with multiple small children. They have a false idea of what running a home involves; its going to be a real shock when they realize it's not all sweetness and light.

Edit: look what it's done to ZsuZsu

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I rest in the afternoon too... after doing not that much either. On the other hand, my serotonin level is low.

I don't think a healthy, young person should sleep during the day. She should take a walk instead.

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Wow. Not going to lie: I wish my everyday was as simple as that. It would awesome.

Slightly related: Where does the term "helpmeet" come from? I know what it is, but the words themselves make no sense. Help meet Jesus? Help Meet me in the middle? Is meet some antiquated version of mate?

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Wow. Not going to lie: I wish my everyday was as simple as that. It would awesome.

Slightly related: Where does the term "helpmeet" come from? I know what it is, but the words themselves make no sense. Help meet Jesus? Help Meet me in the middle? Is meet some antiquated version of mate?

http://www.etymonline.com/index.php?term=helpmeet

as two words in the 1611 Bible, a noun-verb phrase; hyphenated and mistaken as a modified noun by 1670s; see helpmate.

And the entry for helpmate reads

"companion," 1715, altered from helpmeet, a ghost word, from the Biblical translation of L. adjutorium simile sibi [Gen. ii.18] as "an help meet (i.e. fit) for him" (Heb. 'ezer keneghdo), which already by 1673 was being printed as help-meet and mistaken for one word.

Meet did, indeed, mean "fit" or "suitable" at one point.

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Wow. Not going to lie: I wish my everyday was as simple as that. It would awesome.

Honestly, I thought that too. Until I was unemployed for 5 months. It was sooooo incredibly boring. The worst part of being laid off by far was the extreme boredom. I'm even fairly lazy and I love lounging around on the weekends instead of doing anything. And even I was bored to tears after just a few weeks. And I never even expected that to be a problem because in college I never had a problem doing nothing over the month-long winter break. But when there's nothing to look forward to in a set time period, it's just mind-numbing.

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