Divine Betrothal?

[emesbe]

The video of these kid's wedding was on stuff fundies like today. So I clicked through to their blog, and oh, the stupidity.

This is an exciting time! For Samantha and myself, our families and also for our church. After I asked Samantha to be my help meet (November 20th, 2010), we waited to tell others. The only people who knew were my pastor and his wife, my parents and Samantha's parents. We chose with the counsel of our Pastor to not let everyone else know till we could make a public announcement at church (Sunday morning in front of everyone---just a little nervous!! LOL). We chose to do this because we knew that it would seem so sudden for everyone. We also wanted everyone to know that we were 100% under our authorities.

You see Samantha and I do not believe in dating and we did not court prior to our betrothal, we let the Lord guide us. While Samantha was working at a Bible camp she got a peace from God that I was to be her husband, and even though she didn't know, I had gotten that same peace and had been visiting with my pastor about it for sometime (3 Months). We had been praying and seeking God, and his will, and he led us both to the place of peace.

I knew Samantha was the one for me for a long time, but I wouldn't tell her anything until I gained the approval and permission of my parents, our pastor and her parents. I didn't even hint one bit, I was even a little stand offish, so much so that Samantha thought I didn't ever like her as a friend. But I wanted to protect her heart and her emotional purity. If I hinted that I liked her it would of stirred up emotions in her heart and could of easily became defrauding. It was a little hard on her, but she gave it to the Lord and faithfully prayed for me, (and still does, Amen)

Over 4 months had passed since she got her peace, and since I got mine - but my pastor and I continued to fast and pray to make sure we were perfectly in God's will. (I'm the patient one in this relationship :-) )

Once I gained permission. I arranged for Samantha to be brought to a place by my parents, so that I might be able to surprise her. It worked out great. My dad told her to go down to where I was sitting, and we had a wonderful Bible study, then I asked her to stand and got on one knee and she said yes! We were never out of the sight of my parents, which was a great testimony to them, and a great accountability for us. We have a great desire to do things God's way and with all purity.

What does it mean to lead your heart? It means that you dont let emotions make decisions for you. It means that you make sure that you dont let your heart get to attached before its time. What you want is for it to gradually get closer to your betrothed. So that the peak is on the wedding day. Then once you are married, its not two hearts but ONE, joined forever. This is how we can avoid defrauding. Yes, its possible to defraud even your own fiancé.

If you gradually give your heart to each other, then your heart wont have to slam on the breaks. If you gradually give your heart to each other then your wedding day will be that much more sweet. If you gradually give your heart you will be protecting yourself from defrauding one another. If you gradually give your heart then you will help ensure that God will be number one now, and after you are married. If you keep God first, then you are sure to have God's blessing on your engagement period, wedding day, and marriage.

I just do not understand. :shock:

Their wedding video. (I don't think I have ever seen an uglier church. Except perhaps the pissing preacher's.)

divine-betrothal.blogspot.com/p/wedding.html

And their blog. A goldmine of stoooopid. divine-betrothal.blogspot.com/

[Guest Anonymous]

An immense pile o' stoopid. Its scary they are going to immediately breed.

[NurseNell]

The video of these kid's wedding was on stuff fundies like today. So I clicked through to their blog, and oh, the stupidity.

I need to throw up :icon-rolleyes:

Nell

[NurseNell]

Its scary they are going to immediately breed.

She had a miscarriage at 10 weeks. I know how hard this is so no snarking about them wanting children.

Nell

[SamuraiKatz]

wow...this guy.. is totally, totally immersed in the Gothard/S.M. Davis Kool Aid. When will the nightmare end? Yikes!

[NurseNell]

wow...this guy.. is totally, totally immersed in the Gothard/S.M. Davis Kool Aid. When will the nightmare end? Yikes!

But he and Samantha have a teen ministry, and the church has Sunday School. I thought that went against Gothard and Doug. They did write that neither of their parents or their pastor said they had to have a touch free betrothal, that this was what they chose and wanted. They were the first couple in their church to do so.

I wonder what in their backgrounds made them more conservative than their parents or pastor.

Nell

[AugustPenguin]

so how did they get to know each other before getting engaged? They don't really explain how they met and how they made the decision to become betrothed. It's like they just prayed that they would be each others spouse and then got engaged without spending time with one another.

[NurseNell]

so how did they get to know each other before getting engaged? They don't really explain how they met and how they made the decision to become betrothed. It's like they just prayed that they would be each others spouse and then got engaged without spending time with one another.

They belonged to the same church. I'm reading some of the old posts. He was raised by a divorced Mom and wasn't raised in any church. He was saved at 18 (his words, not mine).

Nell

[emesbe]

so how did they get to know each other before getting engaged? They don't really explain how they met and how they made the decision to become betrothed. It's like they just prayed that they would be each others spouse and then got engaged without spending time with one another.

I've read their entire blog and from what I can tell, that's exactly what happened.

[AugustPenguin]

interesting, thanks Nell.

[NurseNell]

I've read their entire blog and from what I can tell, that's exactly what happened.

He's a Baptist preacher and Samantha " is a graduate of our church's Christian Academy". I'd guess that's how they met, through church activities. He's 28, I'm guessing she's more like 19 or 20.

Nell

[NurseNell]

I have to say, playing volleyball in skirts and dresses is very weird. There's photos of an alumni girls' volleyball game and a boys' alumni basketball game on the blog. My older son went to a very conservative Catholic high school and their girls wore volleyball shorts like the rest of the world.

Nell

[emesbe]

I have to say, playing volleyball in skirts and dresses is very weird. There's photos of an alumni girls' volleyball game and a boys' alumni basketball game on the blog. My older son went to a very conservative Catholic high school and their girls wore volleyball shorts like the rest of the world.

Nell

I saw that as well. Playing volleyball in long denim skirts and long sleeved shirts. That sounds like a fricken blast. Sign me up.

[clibbyjo]

I can't get past he asked her to be his HELPMEET!!!!!!!!!! Seriously, you get down on 1 knee, pull out the ring and instead of asking "will you marry me?" he says "will you be my helpmeet?" WTF kind of proposal is that? :naughty:

[mstee]

But I wanted to protect her heart and her emotional purity. If I hinted that I liked her it would of stirred up emotions in her heart and could of easily became defrauding.

Emotional purity? It's not enough for a girl to be restricted from even hugging a guy she is going to marry, and have a fully-intact hymen (pardon the bluntness), but now she has to be emotionally pure? Damn, I can't keep up with these people. Just when I think that the pearly white gates are in my reach (okay by their standard it's a pretty far stretch hahah) , I find out that I also was supposed to keep my heart pure. I guess my boyfriend shouldn't have defrauded my heart. Damn him.

Good thing I don't need to be judged by these poor wackos. :lol:

[duplessis3]

"I knew that it was getting bad, but I kept waiting for her to let me know when she thought she needed to go to the ER' How would she know, when men are supposed to tell her everything? this blog makes me so so very very sad.

[GeoBQn]

I can't get past he asked her to be his HELPMEET!!!!!!!!!! Seriously, you get down on 1 knee, pull out the ring and instead of asking "will you marry me?" he says "will you be my helpmeet?" WTF kind of proposal is that?

It reminds me of King of the Hill.

Peggy: (imitating Hank) "I am sure not unfond of you Peggy, I tell you what." (angry) What kind of marriage proposal is that?!?

[AnnoDomini]

So much to snark on, where to begin...

1. WHAT IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE????? I understand courtship and wanting to stay 'emotionally pure'. But to NOT EVEN COURT?? God gave us common sense, and He meant for us to USE IT. Betrothal when you don't even have a foundation of friendship? Letting the girl think you don't care at all for her? Oh yeah THAT'S a strong foundation for a lifelong commitment.

2. They got a 'peace'? Peace isn't an object-noun like that!

3. Homeschooling (presumably) FAIL. It's not 'should OF' or 'would OF', it's 'should have' or 'would have'. That incorrectness betrays an insufficient number of books read.

4. Do you think he even knows what he means by 'great testimony' with regards to his parents?

5. That's not 'accountability' that's being chaperoned because apparently you two can't be trusted alone. Honestly, if you can't be trusted alone together, can't be trusted to have the self-control... do you really think you're ready for marriage?

[Rachel333]

"If I hinted that I liked her it would of stirred up emotions in her heart and could of easily became defrauding."

These people... ugh, there's so much wrong here. I guess I've heard before from fundies that men struggle with visual issues and women with emotional, so I guess this is the female equivalent of men being unable to control themselves at the slightest suggestion that a woman has a body. They have such low standards and expectations for themselves and each other.

And "getting a peace" sounds very normal to me. One of those Christianese terms that I never thought about sounding weird to other people.

[emesbe]

Also, if anyone has not seen the blog Stuff Fundies Like yet, go take a look. The comments are particularly funny.

http://www.stufffundieslike.com/

[AnnoDomini]

It might be that I'm not fluent in Christianese.

[Rachel333]

Or you just haven't been in the same kinds of churches (not really a bad thing, haha). It's definitely an odd way to say it, when they mean "I got a peaceful feeling about this."

[NurseNell]

3. Homeschooling (presumably) FAIL. It's not 'should OF' or 'would OF', it's 'should have' or 'would have'. That incorrectness betrays an insufficient number of books read.

No homeschooling. She went to the Baptist Academy that was part of their church. It doesn't say where he went but he was raised in a non-religious home by a single Mom who worked 2 jobs. He became a Christian at age 18.

Nell

[fundifugee]

Thanks be unto God for his unspeakable gift.

Wow, sounds like God sent them a pile of poo, or some crotchless chaps, or a box of sex toys

[fundifugee]

I can't get past he asked her to be his HELPMEET!!!!!!!!!! Seriously, you get down on 1 knee, pull out the ring and instead of asking "will you marry me?" he says "will you be my helpmeet?" WTF kind of proposal is that? :naughty:

well, at least he was up front in his intent to acquire a slave.