Proposal after a 7 day courtship

[homeschoolmomma1]

I thought you all would enjoy this article

shine.yahoo.com/love-sex/man-proposes-over-the-radio-to-girlfriend-of-seven-days-202024150.html

[ILoveJellybeans]

Wow, thats a bit short to decide that you would like to marry someone.

[actuallyjessica]

for a second, i saw the thread title and thought "oh my, jessa isn't engaged already, is she?"

LOL.

[Mela99]

Mm...I'm mostly weirded out that they both have kids from previous marriages and I don't like the idea of immediately throwing kids into situations like that.

I was pretty sure on date 3 that my now fiance was my future husband, but I don't think I'd accept a proposal that quick...

[Hane]

Um, I did something like that--first date with a classmate was Dec. 21; fourth date was New Year's Eve, and he proposed, and we got married June 1. But it was 1973, and I was an Italian Catholic Virgin , and we were young, stupid college students. We did graduate on time, and got a great kid out of the deal, even though the whole mishegoss lasted only seven years.

[polecat]

I married my husband without ever going on a single date with him.

But we'd known each other for several years at that point, and when you know, you know. No point messing about with frivolities like dates and whatnot.

[ADoyle90815]

I have an ex-boyfriend who talked about marriage after only a week of dating, and it freaked me out to the point where I broke up with him. He didn't even propose, but even talking about marriage was enough to send me running away. The reason is that when I dated this person, it was shortly after my divorce was final, and since my ex-husband was abusive, there was no way I was going to rush into marriage. I do have a fiancee, but it was after years of dating that we both realized that we were going to get married at some point. The main reason we haven't set a date is that I was laid off, and we both think it would be best to wait until I get a job first. He would rather have a wife that helps with the finances than some Stepford wife.

I also thought at first that it meant that Jessa was already engaged.

[rward]

I'd say that's stupid, but okay, ruin your life however you want, but those poor kids. They're going to be thrown into a new life with new siblings, new parents and no transition or preparation at all. Way to mess the kids up, guys. :angry-banghead:

Full disclosure: The hubby and I were together 16 years before marrying, we just don't care about that kind of stuff, but we had a medical scare and needed to be able to make medical decisions for each other. On the other hand, his mother and father married on a whim after dating 3 months and were happy for 18 years until his father died. So, I don't think whirlwind courtships are always bad, just this one.

[Jana814]

I think that is kind of nuts!! Granted they are both adults and the probably know what they want in a life partner.

[Jana814]

for a second, i saw the thread title and thought "oh my, jessa isn't engaged already, is she?"

LOL.

Same here!!

[RandomTrivia]

I dated a guy for a while who had not 1, but 2, ex-fiancee's. Both times he'd proposed on the first date. Obviously, neither ended well - I think one break-up involved flying Precious Moments figurines.

He never did propose to me, but that's fine with me. LOL Not sure if he ever married, this was 15 years ago and I don't keep in touch with our mutual friends as much as I should.

[church_of_dog]

I dated a guy for a while who had not 1, but 2, ex-fiancee's. Both times he'd proposed on the first date. Obviously, neither ended well - I think one break-up involved flying Precious Moments figurines.

He never did propose to me, but that's fine with me. LOL Not sure if he ever married, this was 15 years ago and I don't keep in touch with our mutual friends as much as I should.

Does that mean there were Precious Moments figurines involved in their first date?

Oh wait, I guess it could also mean they didn't break up immediately after his proposal...

Either way, interesting...

[Mela99]

I dated a guy for a while who had not 1, but 2, ex-fiancee's. Both times he'd proposed on the first date. Obviously, neither ended well - I think one break-up involved flying Precious Moments figurines.

He never did propose to me, but that's fine with me. LOL Not sure if he ever married, this was 15 years ago and I don't keep in touch with our mutual friends as much as I should.

I so want to hear more about the Precious Moments moment.... (OT, But when we all met up in Chicago, there was much discussion about the Precious Moments chapel in... IDK, midwest somewhere. Google it and see Jesus as a precious moments boy nailed to the cross)

[anniebgood]

Went on a blind date with mine (after talking to him on the phone for hours) on March 23. Got engaged in June and married on December 21st of the same year. Been together 28+ years.

His proposal over the phone was "You wanna get married or something?" Yeah Mr Romance. But he had a cute butt a good job and made me laugh. More important he was the only guy that my cat ever liked. If I had a date over she'd jump up from the end table up to the curtain rods and stalk back and forth. With Mr B she curled up in his lap like she'd known him forever.

It's not unknown. Maybe they'll have a long engagement.

:shifty-kitty:

[Full enough quiver]

The precious moments chapel is in Carthage, MO. It's about an hour from where I grew up. I actually think its sort of cute. Weird, but cute.

[tanksmom]

His proposal over the phone was "You wanna get married or something?" Yeah Mr Romance. But he had a cute butt a good job and made me laugh. More important he was the only guy that my cat ever liked. If I had a date over she'd jump up from the end table up to the curtain rods and stalk back and forth. With Mr B she curled up in his lap like she'd known him forever.

It's not unknown. Maybe they'll have a long engagement.

:shifty-kitty:

I have to laugh at that as the way I met my hubbie was my dog charging into his apartment and jumping up into his lap. I figured if he didn't get freaked out about a 100 plus pound dog charging at him he was good people. 15 years later we're still together :lol:

Then again we also bought a house together and shacked up within three months so I'm not necessarily the best person for the fundies to use as an example :nenner:

[Full enough quiver]

The first time my husband and I met was at his front door, where I had come instead of my grandmother to bring dinner to him and his daughter. I swear to god, we looked into each other's eyes and just knew. He invited me in to eat with them. I did, and he asked me to a picnic the next day. After we had eaten, the kids ran off to play. He kissed me and said "I'm going to marry you". We did, 6 months later. So, we had a whirlwind courtship, with kids, one of which was a brokenhearted little girl whose mother had been dead for a year. It has worked, but with a lot of sensitivity and understanding (mostly on my part).

[bananacat]

I married my husband without ever going on a single date with him.

But we'd known each other for several years at that point, and when you know, you know. No point messing about with frivolities like dates and whatnot.

This isn't weird at all. Plenty of people under the age of 30 don't do official dates. I never went on a date date until just about 6 months ago and yet I've had boyfriends and lovers. It's just part of our culture. You still knew your husband well before marrying him, and that's the point. In the past, it wasn't as common for men and women to interact during normal socializing. They wouldn't have worked together and gone to college together and played sports together and gone out for drinks in a group together, so they need a more formalized way of getting to know each other better. Dates are fun, but just not as necessary as they used to be.

[bananacat]

I have an ex-boyfriend who talked about marriage after only a week of dating, and it freaked me out to the point where I broke up with him. He didn't even propose, but even talking about marriage was enough to send me running away. The reason is that when I dated this person, it was shortly after my divorce was final, and since my ex-husband was abusive, there was no way I was going to rush into marriage. I do have a fiancee, but it was after years of dating that we both realized that we were going to get married at some point. The main reason we haven't set a date is that I was laid off, and we both think it would be best to wait until I get a job first. He would rather have a wife that helps with the finances than some Stepford wife.

I also thought at first that it meant that Jessa was already engaged.

I once re-connected with someone from my hometown for sort of a pre-date that I didn't even consider an actual date. And he started talking about marriage during it. We were actually in the heart exhibit at the Franklin Institute so maybe he was making some kind of weird connection to it, but the whole thing was very awkward. There were several reasons why I never went out with him again, but that kinda freaked me out.

[Savoring Samsara]

I dated a guy for a while who had not 1, but 2, ex-fiancee's. Both times he'd proposed on the first date. Obviously, neither ended well - I think one break-up involved flying Precious Moments figurines.

He never did propose to me, but that's fine with me. LOL Not sure if he ever married, this was 15 years ago and I don't keep in touch with our mutual friends as much as I should.

Was it a date with Nathan Maxwell? :D

[Jana814]

The first time my husband and I met was at his front door, where I had come instead of my grandmother to bring dinner to him and his daughter. I swear to god, we looked into each other's eyes and just knew. He invited me in to eat with them. I did, and he asked me to a picnic the next day. After we had eaten, the kids ran off to play. He kissed me and said "I'm going to marry you". We did, 6 months later. So, we had a whirlwind courtship, with kids, one of which was a brokenhearted little girl whose mother had been dead for a year. It has worked, but with a lot of sensitivity and understanding (mostly on my part).

What a great story!! How wonderful I sure it come w/ a lot of sensitivity!

[OnceModestTwiceShy]

Well, I will say that my Partner asked me to move in with him before we were even really officially dating! We had just met through a friend and were really just starting to talk/hang out. I was in a one-year's MA program at the time in a nearby state (it was January at the time), and I remember talking about options for apartments back in our mutual city after I finished when he said, "you can just move in with me". And in May I did, and here we are almost 6 years later. :) We haven't married yet, but we did merge our lives pretty much immediately (he was meeting my parents by February) and both kind of knew right away that this was it for life, with our without a ring.

[SpeakNow]

My grandfather proposed to my grandmother on their first date, and they eloped a month later. They remained married and very much in love their entire lives. I guess some people just know.

[sunshine]

I have an ex-boyfriend who talked about marriage after only a week of dating, and it freaked me out to the point where I broke up with him. He didn't even propose, but even talking about marriage was enough to send me running away. The reason is that when I dated this person, it was shortly after my divorce was final, and since my ex-husband was abusive, there was no way I was going to rush into marriage. I do have a fiancee, but it was after years of dating that we both realized that we were going to get married at some point. The main reason we haven't set a date is that I was laid off, and we both think it would be best to wait until I get a job first. He would rather have a wife that helps with the finances than some Stepford wife.

I also thought at first that it meant that Jessa was already engaged.

I understand that people are protective of their fiance, but please hear me out. If this is his view, what will happen if you become sick and unable to work after the wedding or pregnant and was placed on bed rest? Or, if you have kids and found it is cheaper for you to stay home then to work?

[polecat]

This isn't weird at all. Plenty of people under the age of 30 don't do official dates. I never went on a date date until just about 6 months ago and yet I've had boyfriends and lovers. It's just part of our culture. You still knew your husband well before marrying him, and that's the point. In the past, it wasn't as common for men and women to interact during normal socializing. They wouldn't have worked together and gone to college together and played sports together and gone out for drinks in a group together, so they need a more formalized way of getting to know each other better. Dates are fun, but just not as necessary as they used to be.

I'm nearly a decade beyond thirty, and I can promise you that it was indeed uncommon "back then." :)