Are You a Real Woman?

[GolightlyGrrl]

Let Thor Lund decide:

http://jezebel.com/are-you-a-woman-take ... 1151013834

I'm hoping this is a parody, but I wouldn't be surprised if it's not.

[ILoveJellybeans]

The only way to make sure I'm not lying is to get me naked, do sex to me (penis sex), and ask me questions afterward.

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

This has to be a parody.

I got mostly A and B

[polecat]

Well crap. I'm a turnip.

I don't even like turnips.

[GolightlyGrrl]

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

This has to be a parody.

I got mostly A and B

I'm hoping so but you know Shitstain will take it seriously.

[singsingsing]

Straight A's! I'm "an unfuckable nerd with thinky tendencies. Definitely not a woman." Awww yiss. 8-)

[AtroposHeart]

If I read this out of context I would have thought it was satire, but no it had to be real

[Arete]

Mostly As and a B here. While I do acknowledge I am a nerd, I can still get action when I put effort into finding action. If I am definitely not a woman, I haven't heard any complaints. :lol:

[zeebaneighba]

Unfortunately, it's not. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/08/15/thor-lund-blog-post_n_3764104.html

(not breaking it because it's a news site). Jezebel was making fun of it, but this asshole really did write an unbelievably sexist blog post.

[Ariel]

I read the original essay because I like pain. Here are some highlights!

Every single thing that has ever happened is because of a woman. Wars are fought over them, songs are written for them, I'm going to go out on a limb and say Michael Jordan would not be the greatest NBA player in history if it wasn't because he loved women. They are all of life's motivation. They create life, they care for the young, and you better believe that your mother is the single greatest person in your life, because she carried your lazy ass for nine months inside of her! You started out so helpless that she literally had to give you her breast milk! So, love your mother, and every other woman that will some day be a mother.

Michael Jordan totally wouldn't have been an amazing athlete if he had been into dudes or asexual :roll:

Also, don't love women that won't be mothers. They have no purpose.

eta:

I don't like everyone looking at me because I think I am cool, I like everyone looking at me because subconsciously I don't get enough approval from my mother. I know she is proud of me and she loves me, but honestly I could be President of the United States and somehow I would still find a way to upset her. This past weekend she told me not to talk too much at dinner because I take over conversations and ruin every one else's time. When I left my house four hours ago, I had put her in a bad mood because she had to pay $400 to keep me from getting arrested because I had two outstanding speeding tickets and missed both court dates. So in conclusion, I love my mom, she is proud of me, but whatever it is that causes me to screw up so much is the reason I crave attention. And I satisfy that need by sending out as much love as I can to the girls around me.

:violin: :violin:

Th thing I love most about women and trying to convince them to kiss me is that at the core of it, if you can get a girl over to your place and somehow manage to have her take her clothes off, she will be truthful with you. It is hard to lie to someone who is lying naked next to you. Girls are lying all day long.

I've never actively tried to lie to someone while naked, but I think I could manage it. Even after sex!

The final piece of advice I have for talking to girls is to confuse them. Honestly they deserve it, they have perplexed men since the beginning of time when they tricked us to eat the devil's food in the garden of eden. Give them a taste of their own medicine. If you can confuse their brain, then they will go home with you.

Aaaaaaaaand finally

In conclusion, women are the best. You should love them and treat them with respect. Do the opposite of what they want, unless they say no. Always do what they say when they say no! I am by no means a master of any of this. I strike out twice as much as I succeed. In the next post are some of my biggest failures, they are funny, and I actually suck with girls, I have just managed to find a couple things that work and keep swinging even after I strike out over and over again. Sometimes I worry that I am callous to love and emotion because I will block a girl after she leaves my apartment because I never want to hear from her again, and I can't even remember her name. So then I have to block like four girls with the name that I think it could be. But…. some day I will love someone, and make her my wife, and have children and settle down.

Therapy. This guy need therapy.

[singsingsing]

I think he hit the nail on the head when he said 'I actually suck with girls.' That should have been the first, last, and only line of his essay.

[Peas n carrots]

I think he hit the nail on the head when he said 'I actually suck with girls.' That should have been the first, last, and only line of his essay.

Here here!

I couldn't agree more with him needing lots and lots of therapy. The whole post was just pathetic.

[niagarahauls]

So to summarize Thor Lund has Mommy issues, has trouble picking up women, low self-esteem and is poorly named.

[Dysfundamental]

He'th a thor lother, tho it'th a reathonable name for him.

[Olive Plant]

Th thing I love most about women and trying to convince them to kiss me is that at the core of it, if you can get a girl over to your place and somehow manage to have her take her clothes off, she will be truthful with you. It is hard to lie to someone who is lying naked next to you. Girls are lying all day long.

A naked girl saying "wow, you have a big dick" does not make it true, but I'm sure he'd love to think so.

A naked girl saying "honey, you're the best I've ever had" does not make it true, but I'm sure he'd love to think so.

A naked girl saying "I totally came, no, really," does not make it true, but I'm sure he'd love to think so.

What he's really saying: it's in his best interest to believe that women he convinces to get naked for a one-time hookup before he dumps them are telling the truth in the moments they're naked with him. The outrage afterwards, the rejections that may not lead to getting them naked, those are all LIES.

[docmom]

Apparently I am a lesbian. Will have to let my husband know.

Also, if my grown son made me pay his $400 in traffic tickets I'd be pretty pissed too...

[Sobeknofret]

Unfuckable nerd with thinky tendencies here as well. Funny thing is, I have rarely met a nerd girl who has had trouble getting laid when she wants to, and that goes for the lesbian nerd girls I know as well as the straight ones. Nerd girls rool! :cracking-up:

[Ariel]

Apparently I am a lesbian. Will have to let my husband know.

Also, if my grown son made me pay his $400 in traffic tickets I'd be pretty pissed too...

That's the part that made me extra angry!

How do you miss 2 (!) court dates? And then ask your mom. Jesus. I would have had to take out a loan from my mother with interest (tiny interest, but interest).