Lori Alexander: Give Your Husband SEX!

[GeoBQn]

According to Lori, while a woman having multiple sexual partners is sinful, not having frequent sex with your husband after marriage is equally sinful.

lorialexander.blogspot.com/2013/01/forbidden-fruit.html

Way to make a women with sexual dysfunctions feel even worse, Lori.

I doubt she's going to post my comment about how in Judaism, sex within marriage is the husband's obligation to the wife.

[Claddagh]

I doubt she's going to post my comment about how in Judaism, sex within marriage is the husband's obligation to the wife.

Nah, all Lori thinks the wimmen folk are good for is putting out for their husbands. Once a woman is married her body belongs to her husband. :roll:

There are many women out there who were promiscuous before they were married. Once they are married, they don't seem to enjoy sex anymore or need time to "heal" from their past sexual experiences.

I've never known a woman who has had to "heal" from consentual past sex experiences. I have heard comments of "So-and-so sucks in bed" but nothing about having to heal from past experiences.

Now they have a woman in bed with them {their wife} and deserve to have frequent sex with her.

And no regard to if the wife is in the mood. What if the husband doesn't want sex? What about it then Lori?

One woman I mentored hadn't given her husband sex for four months because she's pregnant and was told not to have sex. This is asking for trouble. I told her she needs to give her husband sex, just be creative. A young man shouldn't have to wait four months to have sex!

Ummm...yeah...if she was told not to have sex by a doctor or something along those lines there's usually a pretty good reason as to why. All I can think of is her blog going "Think of the menz folk and sexy times!"

So now that you know not giving your husband frequent sex is sin and you don't want to walk in sin, start making your husband happy. IT ONLY NEEDS TO TAKE TEN MINUTES!!! That is not much of a sacrifice to have a happy husband.

Bolding mine. Oooooooh, the jokes I could make of this... :twisted:

[desertvixen]

There are many women out there who were promiscuous before they were married. Once they are married, they don't seem to enjoy sex anymore or need time to "heal" from their past sexual experiences. Denying your husband sex, except for a time of prayer or illness, is sin.

Sorry, the only women I know who need to "heal" from their past sexual experiences are the ones who have been raped or sexually abused. (Unfortunately in the Army, we seem to have higher rates of women who come in with the issue, not to mention the issue within the ranks).

Some women wait until their wedding night to have sex but later on, tire of it and don't want it much anymore. This too is sin. When we are commanded to obey our husbands, it includes giving them sex frequently since that is how often most men want it.

Does it ever cross men's minds that maybe, if their wife doesn't want to have sex, it's because their skills are...shall we say, poor? Underdeveloped?

Now they have a woman in bed with them {their wife} and deserve to have frequent sex with her.

No, they don't.

One woman I mentored hadn't given her husband sex for four months because she's pregnant and was told not to have sex. This is asking for trouble. I told her she needs to give her husband sex, just be creative. A young man shouldn't have to wait four months to have sex!

This one just makes me ill. I'm sorry, if I was pregnant and unable to have sex (not an issue in my first pregnancy, thankfully) due to the doctor telling me so, and my husband still wanted it, he would find his ass on the couch. Four months? Boo-fucking-hoo.

That being said, I would probably find a way to keep my partner entertained, but that's because I wouldn't be married to a selfish douche who was more concerned about getting laid rather than the fact that the DOCTOR TOLD ME NO SEX.

And, Lori, just come out and say it. Blow job. Hand job. We have terms for those "other acts" that most of us consider part of the whole because, again, not having sex with selfish douches. If you're too embarrassed to talk frankly about it, you're too embarrassed to harass young pregnant women about not satisfying their husband.

So now that you know not giving your husband frequent sex is sin and you don't want to walk in sin, start making your husband happy. IT ONLY NEEDS TO TAKE TEN MINUTES!!! That is not much of a sacrifice to have a happy husband.

If it only takes ten minutes, than I pity you. Now and then, a quickie is good, but it lacks something. Like time for the woman to get off unless she's really good.

Again, maybe reasons why women aren't doing it. Sex should not be a sacrifice.

[Minerva]

What I'm getting from this is:

1) If women don't enjoy sex with their husbands, it's because they had premarital sex. Not because their husband is bad in bed or anything like that.

2) Your husband deserves sex because you've put out for him in the past. Which isn't rapey at all.

3) If you're pregnant, your husband getting sex is more important than the health of your fetus.

4) Lori's husband does not last very long.

Who wants to post as a fundy newlywed and ask about period sex?

[RosyDaisy]

Oh hell no! Husbands (or any man for that matter) are not owed sex...PERIOD! A woman has the right to say no to ANY man, and no means no.

[Joan of Snarc]

Yeah, just check your email or make a grocery list while you're doin' it. Sometimes I manage a pedicure or give the cat a bath while he's gettin' his 10 minutes in. No excuses. Get busy givin' it up, bitches!

:whistle:

[MissBeaufort]

One woman I mentored hadn't given her husband sex for four months because she's pregnant and was told not to have sex. This is asking for trouble. I told her she needs to give her husband sex, just be creative. A young man shouldn't have to wait four months to have sex!

Er, if he's been living by Lori's rules, any young man will have waited at least 5 years for sex (and that's assuming a very young marriage and hitting puberty at 13) while waiting for a wife. If they can be expected to handle that, I'm sure they can handle 4 months.

[Izzybee]

One woman I mentored hadn't given her husband sex

Given?

Given?

My husband and I share sex. If one of us thinks of it as giving to the other, I think we're doing it wrong.

[bbtlover]

What a bitch! I can't believe she would have the gall to tell a woman to go against doctors orders about not having sex for 4 months during her pregnancy. I hope that woman she "mentored" didn't follow Lori's orders. I was not allowed during my first pregnancy to have sex for the last trimester b/c of pre-term labor and my hubby was able to handle that amount of time without complaints. He just wanted a healthy wife and baby. That is one of the reasons why I love him.

[Arete]

deelaem, if you are reading, cover your eyes, because I am going to say it again. Lori is a twat. Really, truly. A woman who thinks that the value of being a woman begins and ends with what's between her legs and how well it services her husband.

[Freyacat]

Given?

Given?

My husband and I share sex. If one of us thinks of it as giving to the other, I think we're doing it wrong.

That line particularly pisses me off because it implies the woman is only ever using sex as a weapon against her husband, never just having it because she wants it. She hadn't GIVEN him sex? Who is she anyways, Lysistrata?

(As a side note - am I the only married mother in the world who wants sex more frequently than my husband? Cause sometimes I feel like I'm the only one!)

[infooverload]

So, I have to ask a rhetorical question what exactly does a woman deserve from her husband? I mean because this woman makes it sound as though husbands do not want a wife they want a doormat. I wonder if any of the couples they have "counseled" has had a man go umm excuse me I treat my wife with respect and what you are suggesting is pure crap.

[dairyfreelife]

What a bitch! I can't believe she would have the gall to tell a woman to go against doctors orders about not having sex for 4 months during her pregnancy. I hope that woman she "mentored" didn't follow Lori's orders. I was not allowed during my first pregnancy to have sex for the last trimester b/c of pre-term labor and my hubby was able to handle that amount of time without complaints. He just wanted a healthy wife and baby. That is one of the reasons why I love him.

That's because your husband is not an abusive, controlling asshole with a huge ego that needs stroked like Lori's.

[Arete]

So, I have to ask a rhetorical question what exactly does a woman deserve from her husband? I mean because this woman makes it sound as though husbands do not want a wife they want a doormat. I wonder if any of the couples they have "counseled" has had a man go umm excuse me I treat my wife with respect and what you are suggesting is pure crap.

A woman deserves her husband's "umbrella of protection" of course, not to mention him functioning as her personal theologian. After all, the one thing we don't see in Christian history is womenfolk working out their own relationship to God. :roll:

[rene76]

(As a side note - am I the only married mother in the world who wants sex more frequently than my husband? Cause sometimes I feel like I'm the only one!)

I'm with you. My sex drive is usually higher than my husband's. I wonder what counsel Lori would give us.

[lilwriter85]

What a bitch! I can't believe she would have the gall to tell a woman to go against doctors orders about not having sex for 4 months during her pregnancy. I hope that woman she "mentored" didn't follow Lori's orders. I was not allowed during my first pregnancy to have sex for the last trimester b/c of pre-term labor and my hubby was able to handle that amount of time without complaints. He just wanted a healthy wife and baby. That is one of the reasons why I love him.

I agree with this. She did a similar posting several months back about women refusing to have sex with their husbands. It was very screwed up for Lori to say that the woman was asking for trouble. Lori's views on sex are very disturbing. I think that is why she annoys me more than Zsu.

Lori's response to one of the comments.

There are other ways to satisfy your husband without having sexual intercourse. That is all I was saying. Of course, I would never want her to do anything to harm the baby but to deprive your husband of all sex for that long of a time is wrong, unless you are physically unable to even satisfy him some other way than intercourse. This is what I meant by being creative. I can tell you one thing...The next week when I showed up at this woman's home, she told me her husband loved me!

Yeah, there are other ways. But not everyone likes other forms of pleasure. ETA: Lori should also realize that some men are ok with not having sex for months.

[shedemei]

Sorry, the only women I know who need to "heal" from their past sexual experiences are the ones who have been raped or sexually abused.

I can see a woman being extremely guilty about having had sex before marriage if they later become fundie. In a way, I can see that feeling of needing to be forgiven and feeling dirty as something that requires healing (i.e. acceptance, repentance, forgiveness).

[lilwriter85]

I also don't think Lori would post GeoBQn's comment because it involves Judasim. Lori is the type that only thinks Christians matter. She doesn't a crap about other religions and the beliefs in those religions.

[Minerva]

(As a side note - am I the only married mother in the world who wants sex more frequently than my husband? Cause sometimes I feel like I'm the only one!)

I'm with you. My sex drive is usually higher than my husband's. I wonder what counsel Lori would give us.

I want sex more frequently than my partner, too. Except he's not my husband and I'm not a mother.

[guidedbybobafett]

Man, I really wish Lori would stop telling me to have sex all the time. It's starting to get creepy.

[salsa]

That line particularly pisses me off because it implies the woman is only ever using sex as a weapon against her husband, never just having it because she wants it. She hadn't GIVEN him sex? Who is she anyways, Lysistrata?

(As a side note - am I the only married mother in the world who wants sex more frequently than my husband? Cause sometimes I feel like I'm the only one!)

in response to your question, "Given?" ... exactly. It's shared... but not in fundie-land, where it's all about keeping men happy.

in response to the side note - no. You're not alone.

What is the fundie repsonse when the woman is hornier than the man? (probably to deny the urge to better serve the husband until he asks for it. submissiveness, don'tchaknow)

[salsa]

[/quoteThere are other ways to satisfy your husband without having sexual intercourse. That is all I was saying. Of course, I would never want her to do anything to harm the baby but to deprive your husband of all sex for that long of a time is wrong, unless you are physically unable to even satisfy him some other way than intercourse. This is what I meant by being creative. I can tell you one thing...The next week when I showed up at this woman's home, she told me her husband loved me!]

(sorry for the double post)

The Levitical laws are pretty strict about "spilling the seed." That might include the duration of pregnancy, as it would "spill the seed" when it's not possible to conceive another life. And they *definitely* do not include hand jobs or oral sex.

Lori - how 'bout men need to grow up and fundie women need to quit thinking of them as some sort of strange amalgamation of sons/little boys and providers/headships.

[Koala]

I don't even know where to start.

I couldn't have sex for the first trimester of my last 3 pregnancies (out of 4, only 2 resulted in healthy births). You know what my husband wasn't worried about? Sex. You know what he did? He set the alarm at night so he could get up and get my progesterone for me (it was not taken orally, and it was not pleasant, but he did it because I was squeamish and he figured I was doing my part by you know, carrying the baby). The last thing on either of our minds were whether some shrew with a blog thought we should be having sex despite my doctors very strong recommendation not to.

Also, I don't like her suggestion that a man deserves sex. That implies that he should get it at any costs, and that is disgusting. If she thinks the 10 min wonder deserves sex then she can knock herself out, but the rest of us have a little thing called autonomy and aren't necessarily inclined of offer ourselves up on demand because SIN!

[lilith]

I can see a woman being extremely guilty about having had sex before marriage if they later become fundie. In a way, I can see that feeling of needing to be forgiven and feeling dirty as something that requires healing (i.e. acceptance, repentance, forgiveness).

And women who have had sex before marriage might actually realise that their fundie husband is crap in bed and that sex doesn't have to be about duty. So Lori is sure to tell her that if she's dissatisfied it's cause if her past sin, not cause her husband is a lousy, selfish, self entitled fuckwit of a lover.

[GeoBQn]

People are actually disagreeing with her. Here are some of her awful, awful responses.

My issue goes to those who do not have consent, who are withholding sex with many excuses. It is the husband who generally determines frequency and I appeal to wives to find out from their husbands how well they match Paul’s ideals of not defrauding one another.

I agree with you, Lindsay but sometimes it is okay just to give him quick sex if you are exhausted from running after children and taking care of the home all day. This shows him love that you even want to satisfy his sexual need when you're very tired.