Keller parents blow off family meeting

[annalena]

According to Susanna's fb status, (some of?) the Keller children wanted to arrange some kind of reunion, checked for dates with their parents and then they decided not to come anymore.

What kind of parents are they???

[Kitty]

Very selfish, judgemental ones whose heads are stuck way too far up their asses.

[annalena]

Apparently, Daniel wants to put himself out there for adoption.

[xReems]

According to Rebekah, they even hired professional photographers. Daniel wrote "It's official I have the worst parents (its ok, i hate you too, mom and dad)." From the way it looks like, I think the only child the Kellers are okay with is Anna, unless, they've also stopped talking to them for some reason.

I just find it sad how for some families, being part of it, means you have to follow rules, like joining a club. If you don't abide to exactly what they say and turn out to be exactly what they want, you're cut off.

I don't want to jump to conclusions since there is more to the story, but from what some of the Keller children have said, it doesn't look pretty good.

[tabitha2]

Because Anna is a daughter they can brag to their friends about-The other children are failures and an embarassment on the parents part because the parents could not 'keep the children's hearts'

[Guest Anonymous]

I'm saying this as someone who is basically a cold-hearted bitch when it comes to parents, but the Keller kids should stop trying. Let Mom and Dad Keller be just as douchey as they want to be, and try not to let it bother them. I know it sucks and it hurts, but so does banging your head against the wall that the parents have erected in this case.

I cut my mother off and I don't anticipate having any meaningful contact with her in the future, we haven't spoken for almost a year. That hasn't stopped her from telling lies about me and behaving like she always has, but it has stopped most of my stress over it.

Dear Keller kids,

Love one another, love your partners, love your friends. Make yourselves a family that respects and honors you. Those people may be related to you by blood or they may not, but someone that treats you like crap is not worth your time or your tears.

[Patsy]

Daniel wrote "It's official I have the worst parents (its ok, i hate you too, mom and dad)." From the way it looks like, I think the only child the Kellers are okay with is Anna, unless, they've also stopped talking to them for some reason.

They have 8 kids, right? And they're cut off from 3?

[lilwriter85]

According to Rebekah, they even hired professional photographers. Daniel wrote "It's official I have the worst parents (its ok, i hate you too, mom and dad)." From the way it looks like, I think the only child the Kellers are okay with is Anna, unless, they've also stopped talking to them for some reason.

I just find it sad how for some families, being part of it, means you have to follow rules, like joining a club. If you don't abide to exactly what they say and turn out to be exactly what they want, you're cut off.

I don't want to jump to conclusions since there is more to the story, but from what some of the Keller children have said, it doesn't look pretty good.

Things don't like really good with the family at all and there is more to the story. I think the parents are probably ok with Anna, Priscilla, Esther, Nathan and David.

[xReems]

That's the thing that pisses me off about some of these families-Why is it necessary for their children to follow exactly what they have done to still be part of the family? I have yet to hear from a fundie child that they want to leave the movement, still be a good Christian, but not have a huge family, want to go out and dance, and be independent for once.

I do have morals and traditions that I'm going to continue with my children in the future I grew up with, but that doesn't mean, I'm going to be exactly like my parents and how they raised me. I think some of these fundies are so close minded that they truly believe that by shutting them off from the world, their children will continue that path with their children since the world is all owned by Satan. The second a child has a different viewpoint on life, or "rebels", they're cut off. I just find it so funny how fundies put a huge emphasis on family yet cuts them loose if they steer in a different direction. They're just contradicting themselves and use the "they were influencing my other children" as their reasoning behind it all (Jeubs, for example).

I stand by Susanna's decision for leaving to go to Texas, get a job, and experience life. I don't see anything wrong with what she's done. She's still a good Christian, still a good person, this hasn't changed her into some drug and sex addict as so many claim, so why this cold shoulder?

I just think it's really pathetic and an insult to their children that at the last minute, they decided not go to. In my opinion, this just shows that they really do not care about their children unless if they continued on with ATI.

[lilwriter85]

They have 8 kids, right? And they're cut off from 3?

It seems they are cut off from Daniel and Susannah . It seems that they are still in contact with Rebekah even though she and her husband Joshua left ATI/Gothard and he has a "recovering from ATI" site.

[IReallyAmHopewell]

Devil's advocate here (how ironic)

Maybe the Keller kids need to SHUT UP in public and deal with this like adults. Probably the issues with their parents are very real, but NO ONE needs to discuss a family feud on FACEBOOK--that's childish. There's a reason counseling is CONFIDENTIAL.

Again, I'm not doubting that there are real problems here--it's hard not to have them when you won't let kids become adults. But there is always more (or LESS) to the story than those outside the family can see. It's time for Daniel and the others to grow up and deal with this in a mature manner.

One such way is just not to call home anymore. Another is top just move on. But the best place to start is to shut up in public.

[annalena]

I'm saying this as someone who is basically a cold-hearted bitch when it comes to parents, but the Keller kids should stop trying. Let Mom and Dad Keller be just as douchey as they want to be, and try not to let it bother them. I know it sucks and it hurts, but so does banging your head against the wall that the parents have erected in this case.

I cut my mother off and I don't anticipate having any meaningful contact with her in the future, we haven't spoken for almost a year. That hasn't stopped her from telling lies about me and behaving like she always has, but it has stopped most of my stress over it.

Dear Keller kids,

Love one another, love your partners, love your friends. Make yourselves a family that respects and honors you. Those people may be related to you by blood or they may not, but someone that treats you like crap is not worth your time or your tears.

I give them credit for even trying to have a relationship with their parents, but you're right, there's no point in them even trying.

Susanna, Rebekah, Daniel, go and live your own lives. You're such amazing examples for all the young kids stuck in this lifestyle and trying to get out. That should be reason enough to be proud. Have the ones at your wedding that are important to your life, Susanna. Cut out the toxic people. Have your sister's husband walk you down the isle, or your grandpa, or just walk by yourself. A friend of mine actually did that. She cut her abusive father off even though she's fundy-lite.

[annalena]

It seems they are cut off from Daniel and Susannah . It seems that they are still in contact with Rebekah even though she and her husband Joshua left ATI/Gothard and he has a "recovering from ATI" site.

Where do you get this from?

[xReems]

Where do you get this from?

On Daniel's facebook, he's posted a status on how he wishes he could put himself up for adoption and on Susanna's status, he says he has the worst parents ever and hates them too. He also had an adoption status up a while back and his wife, Candice, posted how he could have had a better father. Clearly from just that, he's not okay with his parents. As for Susanna, she left Florida, moved to Texas and is living with her sister. ATI has strong emphasis on daughters living at home until marriage--Susanna didn't. Plus, around the time Anna was in labor, Susanna was posting some cryptic messages regarding her family. Again, speculation with Susanna, but from the way it looks like, she's definitely not ATI, so my guess is that her parents are not too fond of it.

[LilMissMetaphor]

I'm saying this as someone who is basically a cold-hearted bitch when it comes to parents, but the Keller kids should stop trying. Let Mom and Dad Keller be just as douchey as they want to be, and try not to let it bother them. I know it sucks and it hurts, but so does banging your head against the wall that the parents have erected in this case.

I cut my mother off and I don't anticipate having any meaningful contact with her in the future, we haven't spoken for almost a year. That hasn't stopped her from telling lies about me and behaving like she always has, but it has stopped most of my stress over it.

Dear Keller kids,

Love one another, love your partners, love your friends. Make yourselves a family that respects and honors you. Those people may be related to you by blood or they may not, but someone that treats you like crap is not worth your time or your tears.

Truth.

[annalena]

On Daniel's facebook, he's posted a status on how he wishes he could put himself up for adoption and on Susanna's status, he says he has the worst parents ever and hates them too. He also had an adoption status up a while back and his wife, Candice, posted how he could have had a better father. Clearly from just that, he's not okay with his parents. As for Susanna, she left Florida, moved to Texas and is living with her sister. ATI has strong emphasis on daughters living at home until marriage--Susanna didn't. Plus, around the time Anna was in labor, Susanna was posting some cryptic messages regarding her family. Again, speculation with Susanna, but from the way it looks like, she's definitely not ATI, so my guess is that her parents are not too fond of it.

Sorry, I actually knew that. :) What I was trying to ask- why does it seem they are in contact with Rebekah? Should have made that clearer. What is it that she does differently? She does not seem to be quiverfull, she has only 2 daughters, they wear defrauding jeans and (super cute) dresses and have short hair (again- super cute).

She does not live up to their expectations either, it seems to me.

[Koala]

I'm saying this as someone who is basically a cold-hearted bitch when it comes to parents, but the Keller kids should stop trying. Let Mom and Dad Keller be just as douchey as they want to be, and try not to let it bother them. I know it sucks and it hurts, but so does banging your head against the wall that the parents have erected in this case.

I cut my mother off and I don't anticipate having any meaningful contact with her in the future, we haven't spoken for almost a year. That hasn't stopped her from telling lies about me and behaving like she always has, but it has stopped most of my stress over it.

Dear Keller kids,

Love one another, love your partners, love your friends. Make yourselves a family that respects and honors you. Those people may be related to you by blood or they may not, but someone that treats you like crap is not worth your time or your tears.

Amen to this. I have cut a biological parent out of my life (almost 20 years ago) and it was the best decision I ever made for myself.

I have 2 kids, and I am telling you NOTHING they could do would make me distance myself from them. The fact that the Keller's are pushing away from their own children says a lot about the kind of people they are.

[annalena]

Amen to this. I have cut a biological parent out of my life (almost 20 years ago) and it was the decision I ever made for myself.

I assume you mean the best decision? :)

I hope I'll have the guts to do that one day.

[missbrooklyn]

As a mother who would take a bullet for the Brooklynettes, I can't imagine how Anna's mother is dealing with this. According to her own screwed up belief system, she has to abide by her penishead's decision to cut off the kids, even if she doesn't want to. This would be where Mr. Long Island and I would part company-kids first, and shut up. What is going through that woman's head? I also wonder if the Keller's standing in their blighted community has taken a serious hit because of their defecting progeny. I'm guessing the other fundies think less of them because of their inability to make their kids tow the line. Run, younger Keller kids! Get out now, Priscilla!

[CanticleoftheTurning]

I'm saying this as someone who is basically a cold-hearted bitch when it comes to parents, but the Keller kids should stop trying. Let Mom and Dad Keller be just as douchey as they want to be, and try not to let it bother them. I know it sucks and it hurts, but so does banging your head against the wall that the parents have erected in this case.

I cut my mother off and I don't anticipate having any meaningful contact with her in the future, we haven't spoken for almost a year. That hasn't stopped her from telling lies about me and behaving like she always has, but it has stopped most of my stress over it.

Dear Keller kids,

Love one another, love your partners, love your friends. Make yourselves a family that respects and honors you. Those people may be related to you by blood or they may not, but someone that treats you like crap is not worth your time or your tears.

THIS. My parents cut me off first, tried to rope me back in, and then started abusing me again so I cut *them* off at that point. There just comes a point when you recognize that others will never change, and when you need to move on and make your own family. It's extremely painful to have to admit it, but once you do admit it and take action, then and only then can you truly start healing.

I'm still mad at my parents for not allowing my littlest siblings to contact me, but I'm resolving to better myself and my financial situation so that if and when any of them want to escape too, I will be in a position where I can help them.

I hope the Keller "outcasts" might be able to heal.

[Witsec7]

My parents were toxic. I cut them off in 1976 when I was 25.

[GeoBQn]

Sorry, I actually knew that. :) What I was trying to ask- why does it seem they are in contact with Rebekah? Should have made that clearer. What is it that she does differently? She does not seem to be quiverfull, she has only 2 daughters, they wear defrauding jeans and (super cute) dresses and have short hair (again- super cute).

She does not live up to their expectations either, it seems to me.

It's apparently more acceptable if a daughter leaves the movement after getting married, because she's under her husband's authority and is presumably doing what he wants. If a son ever leaves or a daughter leaves before marriage, that's bad.

[marmalade]

Sorry, I actually knew that. :) What I was trying to ask- why does it seem they are in contact with Rebekah? Should have made that clearer. What is it that she does differently? She does not seem to be quiverfull, she has only 2 daughters, they wear defrauding jeans and (super cute) dresses and have short hair (again- super cute).

She does not live up to their expectations either, it seems to me.

I think the parents are still in contact with Rebekah and Esther (the oldest) because even though they went different ways (Esther went with Dougie and as we know, Rebekah and her hubby left ATI altogether) is that they believe the wife must obey the wishes of the husband. If he wants to follow Dougie, you follow Dougie; they're being obedient wives as far as Ma & Pa Keller are concerned. It doesn't matter that Rebekah and Josh's decision was made as a couple, to the parents, she's still serving her husband. *eyeroll* They disowned Daniel when he chose not to work with his father as part of his ministry, as we've seen Smuggar take over Boob's car business, JD take over the towing and Zach Bates continue to work with his asshole of a father in the tree cutting biz.

[annalena]

So, Rebekah didn't leave until she got married?

Makes sense about the authority.

My parents were toxic. I cut them off in 1976 when I was 25.

My parents are toxic. I wish I'll be able to cut them off in 2012 when I'm 28. :)

It's not an easy thing to do.

[Witsec7]

So, Rebekah didn't leave until she got married?

Makes sense about the authority.

My parents are toxic. I wish I'll be able to cut them off in 2012 when I'm 28. :)

It's not an easy thing to do.

Its not easy. I'm very close to my cousins and was very close with the elders in my mothers family when they were alive. I'm lucky because they knew my mother was whacked. That being said, I had good insurance and wonderful counseling. I could never imagine being estranged from DD.

You'll come to a point where you build compassionate and empathetic family of choice.

FWIW I never went to either of their funerals. Call me cold, I don't care.

I'll keep you in the light.