The No-Courtship Courtship

[longskirts]

"The next morning, as I was getting ready to go to work, Dad walked into my room and said: “I am not telling you that you have to, but I think that you are dumb if you do not marry, or at least think about marrying Laura. That is all.†And he walked out. I then asked him what I should do."

reformedtngirl.wordpress.com/2013/04/04/the-rest-of-the-story/

Remember when Olivia mentioned the friends who got engaged without courting? This is their account of their relationship.

I like that they were friends for several years before getting engaged, and they seem to really like each other. But the way this was orchestrated by the fathers is just creepy. I especially dislike the fathers revealing their kids' imperfections to their future spouses.

[Slt]

"The next morning, as I was getting ready to go to work, Dad walked into my room and said: “I am not telling you that you have to, but I think that you are dumb if you do not marry, or at least think about marrying Laura. That is all.†And he walked out. I then asked him what I should do."

reformedtngirl.wordpress.com/2013/04/04/the-rest-of-the-story/

Remember when Olivia mentioned the friends who got engaged without courting? This is their account of their relationship.

I like that they were friends for several years before getting engaged, and they seem to really like each other. But the way this was orchestrated by the fathers is just creepy. I especially dislike the fathers revealing their kids' imperfections to their future spouses.

Eew. I don't know why this creeps me out so, but it does. These people had no romantic feelings toward each other and "WALLA" they're engaged?

Now, I don't have much room to talk- according to my (ahem, lovely) ILs, my husband and I never dated. We also never courted to their disapproval. But in reality, we did date- they were just in denial. But to have NO inkling that a relationship was even budding- and to have this creeper propose? Weird.

[OnceModestTwiceShy]

Isn't "Semper Reformanda" (on that blog header) the "Botkin family motto?"

[Dysfundamental]

I don't quite understand what "semper reformanda" is supposed to mean. Some singular grammatically-feminine thing which is unnamed must always be transformed? What? The spirit? The church? You don't just leave words out of mottoes like that; that's horrible Latin.

[longskirts]

It's talking about the church. It's short for "Ecclesia semper reformanda est."

[wildrose]

"The next morning, as I was getting ready to go to work, Dad walked into my room and said: “I am not telling you that you have to, but I think that you are dumb if you do not marry, or at least think about marrying Laura. That is all.†And he walked out. I then asked him what I should do."

reformedtngirl.wordpress.com/2013/04/04/the-rest-of-the-story/

For a brief and giddy moment, after reading the words above and seeing "reformedtngirl", I though her Dad was advocating a same-sex marriage. What a surreal moment! But then I kept on reading and came to my senses. What a crushing disappointment. :lol:

[salex]

"The next morning, as I was getting ready to go to work, Dad walked into my room and said: “I am not telling you that you have to, but I think that you are dumb if you do not marry, or at least think about marrying Laura. That is all.†And he walked out. I then asked him what I should do."quote]

Ok, so this guy who was supposedly old enough to get married had to be told by his dad to marry this girl AND after he was told, had to ask him what to do?

And this is a success story?

I can't imagine marrying a guy who couldn't come up with the idea to marry me on his own!

[Chicken bones]

---

Actually, both their accounts of the decision are rather sweet. And it is nice to see they took a "hands on" approach to their time together before their marriage.

[miffy]

Happiness in marriage is entirely a matter of chance. If the dispositions of the parties are ever so well known to each other, or ever so similar before-hand, it does not advance their felicity in the least. They always continue to grow sufficiently unlike afterwards to have their share of vexation; and it is better to know as little as possible of the defects of the person with whom you are to pass your life

:lol: :lol:

[alba]

I find it a little disconcerting that the guy's father said "I think you are dumb if you don't marry her". It just seems so critical, and I get the impression this man's spent his entire life trying to please his father.

:lol: :lol:

Jane Austen?

[miffy]

I find it a little disconcerting that the guy's father said "I think you are dumb if you don't marry her". It just seems so critical, and I get the impression this man's spent his entire life trying to please his father.

Jane Austen?

Yup, Pride & Prejudice.

[browngrl]

What is it with the games (tic tac toe/draw something etc) on her iPod? She has a picture of a meme of scumbag guy and says that the games should have given her a clue to what was going on. I don't get it. Is there a hidden message to those games?

[love2scrap]

these two seem to run in the VF circles. Darby Sproul posted that she attended the wedding and so did the Brookshire sisters. Melissa Mcdonald has a few photos with them and her beau on FB too.

Somewhere i saw the wedding photo of these two which I will have to try and find again.

In other odd news, Jessica Mcdonald seems to have broken up with her beau Knox Buciak. They have both scrubbed all photos of each other from FB and appear solo in their profile pictures. If this is really another broken courtship that is two down for Jessica right? Including the first one who eventually got engaged to Melissa.

[LynnGrey]

Why did he want to avoid eye contact with her leading up to the proposal?

[divadivine]

So, it's pretty much an arranged marriage... except they knew each other before?

[Slt]

---

Actually, both their accounts of the decision are rather sweet. And it is nice to see they took a "hands on" approach to their time together before their marriage.

I don't really get what is sweet about it. Especially his side of the story. You have to be commanded by your father to marry a girl? You avoid eye contact? You play computer games? Yes, they touched before marriage- but overall, it is an arranged marriage through and through.