How to write letters to a husband that doesn't exist

[formergothardite]

By Miss Raquel (of course):

To begin with she says that some people have said spending your time writing letters to a guy you may never meet is not that great of a thing. She replies that you may get married when you are 78, so write those letters! She also tells a tragic story where a woman realized the letters she wrote were kind of stupid so she threw them away then she met her husband who wanted to read the letters. So sad. :( :violin:

Her first letters were really silly but now:

But as I grew older, as I learned more about the world, about men, about hopes and dreams, and about pain, my letters took on a more mature ring to them. I already have a box full of letters, so I decided to start a journal now.

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

This is not just a regular journal, though, God hand-picked it out for her. (I am not kidding)

Anyway, how to write to your husband who might not exist:

Things You're Looking Forward To //

It can be anything from fulfilling bucket list wishes, to dancing in the rain, to watching movies together.

Hopes and Dreams //

Talk to him about things you'd like to accomplish together

(this is pretty much the exact same thing as the first one, but just ignore that fact)

Prayers //

Pray for your relationship. Pray for your marriage. Pray for your children. And writing down these prayers and recording them to be able to read in years to come is something really precious...

:roll: :?

Things You Love About Him //

But write down things you know you'll love about. His love for God. His love for you. His smile. His eyes. Tell him that you love being his.

Verses, Quotes and Songs //

They're fun little sparkles to add to your writings to him. And it's always so fun to know that you can sing those songs to him someday

Oh. My. God. :lol:

god-sdaughter.blogspot.com/

[happy atheist]

What is it with this woman and dancing in the rain? Did she see it in a movie once? Is it supposed to be the ultimate romantic thing? I don't get it.

[OkToBeTakei]

This is not new, my friends and I did this when we were teens. Not so much rain dancing though, more dear future husband please be 6ft, rich and hung like a donkey.

Very similar though.

[formergothardite]

Did you keep them and spend your wedding night reading them aloud to your spouse?

:D

[OkToBeTakei]

Did you keep them and spend your wedding night reading them aloud to your spouse?

:D

Errr no?

[Guest Anonymous]

Did you keep them and spend your wedding night reading them aloud to your spouse?

:D

Even if she had saved herself for the wedding night, it might not have been prudent to read him the bit about being hung like a donkey, if she wanted an anxiety-free performance.... :lol:

[formergothardite]

Errr no?

And there was no crying about how you should have never thown them out?! According to Miss Raquel this should have caused much sadness! I bet you didn't even include dancing in the rain. :snooty:

I wrote a letter too. But even then I knew it was stupid and didn't keep it very long. The guy I wanted to marry at 13 was not the guy I wanted to marry when I actually got married.

[doggie]

Someone buy that girl a vibrator it may be her only husband.

[LostSamurai]

Am I the only one who finds her charming? :lol:

Yes, she's a fundie and I personally find the whole 'GOD PICKED OUT A HUSBAND' thing creepy as hell....but compared to the likes of Zsu, Kendull, and the Tool Gang, I find her harmless and cute.

I almost feel bad for her because men will take advantage of her.

[formergothardite]

She pretty much believes a lot of the same stuff fundies believe. She hates gay people, thinks abortion is murder and should be illegal, thinks women should be submissive, she just writes more about how she is so special that God picked a journal out for her that it is easy to miss the other stuff.

[Trynn]

This reminds me of the time in high school when --I kid you not-- for Bible class we had to --gag-- practice writing our boyfriend a breakup letter. I'd never had a boyfriend in my life, nor was I interested in having one. I decided that if they were going to make me do it, I was going to have fun with it.

A few years ago, I stumbled across it when going through old papers (yes, I still have it, I save practically EVERYTHING.) It was cringe worthy, but still funny as heck. I remember it began, "dear stupid boyfriend..."

I heard the spiel about writing a letter to my future husband too. I considered for.... mm, about 5 seconds before deciding that I would be just as happy never getting married, and happily went back to reading my books.

[Anise]

She is silly and sentimental. She seems to pick up on any fundie theme which strikes her as most romantic- letter writing to future husband, courtship, and all the princess stuff. The sad thing about it is that if she does have a courtship, it won't be half as romantic as she imagines, and it's just downhill from there, partly because it's no longer about her. All the activities she is looking forward to in her letters are stuff she wants.

Also, she admits that her early letters were silly and naïve, but now she is more mature? Lol. :doh:

[LynnGrey]

There's a girl who has a Tumblr blog, Dear Future Husband http://allformyfuturehusband.tumblr.com/, who writes her letters for all to see. They are quite hilarious. Very dreamy and full of unrealistic expectations. Sometimes it makes me very sad because it's obvious she's pining away for someone who doesn't exist.

[lilwriter85]

Am I the only one who finds her charming? :lol:

Yes, she's a fundie and I personally find the whole 'GOD PICKED OUT A HUSBAND' thing creepy as hell....but compared to the likes of Zsu, Kendull, and the Tool Gang, I find her harmless and cute.

I almost feel bad for her because men will take advantage of her.

I agree, she is harmless compared to Zsu and Kendull. Like formergothardite said, she does believe a lot of the same things that fundies believe in. But I don't see her ever become extremely hateful like Zsu.

[fauxmenno]

Dear Lord,

Please give Miss Raquel some common sense and make her give up her delusional belief that you care about her own speshul self enough to hand her a perfect husband while she sits around and does nothing with her life. Really, it would be doing the poor immature child a favor, even if it means one less thing for us at FJ to snark over.

Sincerely,

FauxMenno

[formergothardite]

Dear Lord,

Please give Miss Raquel some common sense and make her give up her delusional belief that you care about her own speshul self enough to hand her a perfect husband while she sits around and does nothing with her life. Really, it would be doing the poor immature child a favor, even if it means one less thing for us at FJ to snark over.

Sincerely,

FauxMenno

From your lips to God's ears. :pray:

[Cannelle]

Has she ever...you know, like BEEN in the rain? That shit's COLD. When it rains, I want to go inside where it's warm, not stay around dancing in it, with someone else who's cold and wet. Not romantic at all.

[ILoveJellybeans]

That poor man. Whoever this poor guy who decides to enter a relationship with her is going to have so much expectations to live up to.

The closest thing I have come to writing a letter to my future girlfriend is writing my feelings for her down on paper because I couldnt hold them in anymore but couldnt tell her because I know shes into men.

I think obsessively doing it when you dont even have any specific person in mind is kinda sad though.

[formergothardite]

A box of letters, plus a journal that God hand picked! That is a lot of reading he is going to be doing. Of course, he will have breaks while she sings to him out of her letters.

[keen23]

When I was 13, I wanted to marry Balthazar Getty. I was obsessed with him in the 1990's movie version of Lord of the Flies, and made my friends sit through it multiple times. I imagine my letters to him at the time (had I been writing to him) would have been along the lines of how awesome it would be to be trapped on a tropical island with him.

[mockingbird]

There's a girl who has a Tumblr blog, Dear Future Husband http://allformyfuturehusband.tumblr.com/, who writes her letters for all to see. They are quite hilarious. Very dreamy and full of unrealistic expectations. Sometimes it makes me very sad because it's obvious she's pining away for someone who doesn't exist.

Wouldn't a husband already know all the things in her letter of suggestions of how to make her happy?

I guess he would need that letter if they were a fundy couple and barely got to know each other before getting married. I would hope my SO would know things like my favorite food and what TV shows I watch way before he became my husband... :?

I love how Raquel thinks she has gotten more mature! That poor guy. haha

I thought about doing this once as a teen (probably read about it on some Christian site) but didn't know what I would say to someone I didn't know. I never even made a list of what I want in a boyfriend or anything like that.

[GRUM]

tsssh, this girl! if she's so set on all this lettering writing, she oughta check out this old blog: notestomyfuturehusband.com/ god knows coke talk would do little Miss God's One-and-only-One a world of good.

[dairyfreelife]

The only good thing I see about getting caught in the cold rain with my SO is warming each other up afterwards, I'm sure you know what I mean. :twisted:

[nokidsmom]

I see her as either 1) suffering the probable fates of the the Arndt boys, meaning she's never getting married because her expectations are so high AND she expects the guy to be just be dropped down from heaven with no effort on her part or 2) she's going to find herself tied to a real abusive jerk who manages to say and do all the right things to rope her in until it's too late.

[Aisling]

I feel bad for her, and a bit worried really. She is very silly and holds the typical reactionary fundie views, but she is only a kid, and she is concentrating so intensely on a relationship with someone she may never meet. I just can't imagine being so obsessive over what is, essentially, only a future possibility, amongst many potential futures.

In the normal way of things, a few relationships and break ups are healthy, and a part of growing & maturing. I would worry about the effect a relationship ending would have on MR however. I don't see how she could deal with the basics, after the incredible amount of time and effort she puts into the fantasy.