Fundie lite family wedding today

[Sola]

Yup, I get the pleasure of sitting in church today for 2+ hours.

The family member (my niece) is getting married this afternoon. Now they are not really what you would consider to be typically fundie lite, but that is the closest we have here in the UK, I'd say. Our fundies are no way near as fundie as your fundies :lol: But the minister who is marrying them most certainly is. He has only agreed to marry them if they are confirmed into the church, which by the way is happening today prior to the wedding. That's why the wedding is going to be so damn long. :x

I find it quite bizarre to be honest. The minister is most certainly a fire and brimstone type of preacher. Though why on earth would he want people to be confirmed into the church before marrying them? Being confirmed isn't going to make someone a christian (my niece is), and it wont make them attend church regularly after (not sure if they will or not).

Anyway, wish me luck, I can feel my militant atheist tendencies coming out already. Better keep my gob shut this afternoon!

[Guest Anonymous]

Sounds fun - what denomination are they? :)

[latraviata]

Yup, I get the pleasure of sitting in church today for 2+ hours.

The family member (my niece) is getting married this afternoon. Now they are not really what you would consider to be typically fundie lite, but that is the closest we have here in the UK, I'd say. Our fundies are no way near as fundie as your fundies :lol: But the minister who is marrying them most certainly is. He has only agreed to marry them if they are confirmed into the church, which by the way is happening today prior to the wedding. That's why the wedding is going to be so damn long. :x

I find it quite bizarre to be honest. The minister is most certainly a fire and brimstone type of preacher. Though why on earth would he want people to be confirmed into the church before marrying them? Being confirmed isn't going to make someone a christian (my niece is), and it wont make them attend church regularly after (not sure if they will or not).

Anyway, wish me luck, I can feel my militant atheist tendencies coming out already. Better keep my gob shut this afternoon!

I wish you strength and wisdom ;) ;)

[pixydust]

Oh, good lord! Good luck, and hopefully you won't be struck down by lightening ;)

[contrary]

the worst part of things like this, in my opinion, is the obvious lack of a bar.

[Shina]

Sola, you should bring a flask. Makes everything more enjoyable!

[Cassandra]

the worst part of things like this, in my opinion, is the obvious lack of a bar.

This this this!

Dry weddings are a sin.

[Sola]

More tomorrow. Corsets are wonderful for women with who have been through childbirth. High heels are not. My feet ache.

The minister pinged my gaydar. Big time. The service was loooooooooooong....

Bride was beautiful.

There was a bar at the reception. Hic!

[xDreamerx]

The Anglican Church (maybe Catholics also? I'm not sure but I would imagine so) requires that you undergo confirmation before marrying. It might be relaxed among low-church Anglicans and in the wider Communion as my mum was able to be married without being confirmed, but among high-church Anglicans and Anglo-Catholics it is a requirement. Kate Middleton had to be confirmed before she was able to marry. Sorry just had to chime in since I had an answer.

[Sola]

Sounds fun - what denomination are they? :)

High Church Anglo-Catholic.

It's a very conservative church. It's the one that my husband was brought up in. We didn't get married there, my dad was a minister at a Low Church Anglican, far more liberal and that's where we got married and had the kids baptised at.

The ceremony last 2.5 hours! It was bloody freezing in the church. One of my SiL's has lupus and a lot of circulation problems; her fingers were blue by the time it finished. Then we were around an hour outside - even colder - for the photographs.

The ceremony just seem to go on and on, lots of incense which really made my eyes water - honestly there were clouds of it! I was surprised that Lisa (my niece) vowed to obey - although considering how conservative the church is, it was probably expected. One of the readings was Ephesians 5 (sigh...). Another was one from 1 Peter, no prizes for guessing which verses...

I thought my eyes might roll out of my head at that point.

I didn't go for communion, I was one of the few who stayed behind. My husband did, he is an atheist too but is more willing to toe the line for appearances sake. I couldn't see the point as it would have been meaningless for me. But at least I wasn't the only one who didn't bother.

There was a wedding breakfast at a hotel, at which we had more prayers and grace spoken - my niece's new in-laws are much more fundie than her side of the family. The meal was nice, afterwards there were lots (and lots) of speeches and toasts. Then I nipped home to pick up the kids and came back for the evening party at which every biblical reference was thrown out of the window and we all proceeded to get drunk LOL!

A good time was had by all in the end, we wobbled home at about 11.30 - the party was still going strong - I had my shoes in my hands and walked through the car park to the taxi barefoot, killer heels do not agree with me.

I have a headache this morning!

[Olivia]

I went to a fundie-lite family wedding recently. Also long ceremony, but dry reception, and I was specifically told if I bought a flask we'd be asked to leave (I guess someone knows me well). Such a barrel of fun.

[FaustianSlip]

Hey, at least if it's Anglicans, they're not likely to ban drinking at the reception. After all, you know you're an Anglican when you're setting up for coffee hour and can't find the coffee mugs, but you run across six corkscrews.

[pixydust]

Sola, I'm glad that you had fun at the reception and got your drink on! :twisted:

[Sola]

I think I would have had a breakdown if the reception had been dry!

[TheSassyOne]

Have fun at the wedding reception Sola [i hope]!

For Catholics, Confirmation is usually held once a year as an event (usually for those in middle/high school) and at the Easter Vigil Mass. Sometimes a Confirmation is held on a feast day, like Pentecost, but I honestly never heard of someone being confirmed immediately before or during their nuptials [at least in the Catholic religion] but that's just my experience.

As for not drinking at a wedding reception being a sin, I say AMEN! Look, I'm in Southern Louisiana, and quite honestly in our region, we probably drink alcohol more per capita than anywhere else. That is not a statement I am proud of, by the way. I don't usually drink more than four or five alcoholic beverages a year...yes, I said a year. I can't help it, the stuff goes straight to my fingers and toes and they get numb and I don't like that feeling, so I don't drink that much :( That said, I think most people enjoy a glass of wine or champagne at a wedding reception. Or that nice punch that has liquor mixed in that you don't notice until you've hit the floor [okay, so maybe once I ignored my tingling toes and fingers].

So Sola, I'm praying that if there's no booze at the reception, at least when you return home, you can in the peace of your home, relax and enjoy a few glasses of wine.

[Sola]

It was yesterday Sassy, and we had booze thankfully! Although I am not sure my head is so thankful today. I rarely drink, no objection to it I just don't do it very often, so I'm not used to it. I had 4 glasses of wine, 1 bucksfizz and a glass of champagne for the toasts, my head was pretty sore this morning!

[TheSassyOne]

Gah, I just realized that it was yesterday. I read all the posts, but I didn't see the one that stated you'd attended already and your gaydar went off on the minister...haha :oops: Well, I'll just blame the anesthesia for still being in my system from yesterday. Yep, that works for me!

I'm glad you had a great time and it sounds like you could be an honorary Louisianan OR we could be honorary Brits[i think, correct me please if I'm wrong again], because both know how to have a jolly good time!

[ohmeohmy]

This is sort of off-topic, but if dry weddings are a sin what do you do with alcoholic family members? My father in law is a recovering alcoholic, so we chose to have a dry wedding because we didn't want him to be uncomfortable. We got a lot of flak for it, and everyone from my side of the family hit the nearest bar on the way home from the reception, but I thought it was the nicer thing to do.

Glad you were able to endure, Sola, and hope your headache feels better! :) I am a lightweight and can get in trouble with an open bar.

[ADoyle90815]

I've only been to one dry wedding reception, and that was done out of respect for the Mormons who attended. This was in Las Vegas, so anyone who wanted to drink waited until they could go to the bar at the casino where most people were staying at.

[Guest Anonymous]

I went to a fundie-lite family wedding recently. Also long ceremony, but dry reception, and I was specifically told if I bought a flask we'd be asked to leave (I guess someone knows me well). Such a barrel of fun.

Charming!

One of my (former) best friends had a limited amount of alcohol at her wedding. She told me the week before the wedding that she was putting me 'in charge of looking after x', a girl in her church with learning disabilities for the whole day, "so that you won't be able to get drunk". I was livid on so many levels (that she believed me not to be able to control my own drinking, that I was a potential embarassment to her, that felt she she had the right to expect me to be a carer for someone for the day but didn't seem consider me as someone she could just ask for a favour and know I would be a companion to X out of friendship, rather than coercion). The worst fucking thing was that she had gladly accepted my offer to buy the champagne for the toast for the whole wedding party as my gift to her so she was no teetotaller herself....... :twisted:

[xDreamerx]

Hey, at least if it's Anglicans, they're not likely to ban drinking at the reception. After all, you know you're an Anglican when you're setting up for coffee hour and can't find the coffee mugs, but you run across six corkscrews.

This. Is Anglicanism considered fundie lite? I feel a bit confused on that score. I mean, I wouldn't consider it progressive in terms of it's theology but it was the first denomination to sanction birth control (1930), it allows the ordination of women, and doesn't preach submission or having large families..

[dormouse]

This. Is Anglicanism considered fundie lite? I feel a bit confused on that score. I mean, I wouldn't consider it progressive in terms of it's theology but it was the first denomination to sanction birth control (1930), it allows the ordination of women, and doesn't preach submission or having large families..

My husband was raised Anglican and, although no longer practicing, still believes in God. Yet he is a very liberal pot smoker, and is married to a non-believer.

and :lol: @ the corkscrews.

[CanticleoftheTurning]

This. Is Anglicanism considered fundie lite? I feel a bit confused on that score. I mean, I wouldn't consider it progressive in terms of it's theology but it was the first denomination to sanction birth control (1930), it allows the ordination of women, and doesn't preach submission or having large families..

There's the really old-school Anglo Catholics who might be better at home in a really conservative Catholic parish, but that's not necessarily fundie lite. They may seem like it compared to the general liberal Anglican/Episcopalian churches. Still, I suppose different pastors might have fundie-lite tendencies in a mainstream Anglo-Catholic parish?

LOL@ Ephesians readings. There's a reason DH and I didn't choose that one when we got married. :roll:

[dormouse]

There's the really old-school Anglo Catholics who might be better at home in a really conservative Catholic parish, but that's not necessarily fundie lite. They may seem like it compared to the general liberal Anglican/Episcopalian churches. Still, I suppose different pastors might have fundie-lite tendencies in a mainstream Anglo-Catholic parish?

My husband's former Sunday-school teacher is now a pastor in what looks like a Fundie Lite church.

peoplesmontreal.org/

Not very snarkworthy except for a couple homophobic "choicer" sermons, and some event trying to convert Muslims.

[Sola]

This. Is Anglicanism considered fundie lite? I feel a bit confused on that score. I mean, I wouldn't consider it progressive in terms of it's theology but it was the first denomination to sanction birth control (1930), it allows the ordination of women, and doesn't preach submission or having large families..

It depends, there are different sects (for want of a better word) between Anglicans. High Church Anglican is much more conservative and would probably be considered to be fundie-lite. High Church Anglo-Catholic is even more conservative so would be considered to be fundie-lite. HCAC is more abortion is wrong, no sex before marriage (they sorta failed that one with myself and my hubby :lol: ), wives submit, yada yada yada. Plus there are links with the Pope and 'regular' Catholicism. Low Church Anglican is very liberal; limited abortion is fine, contraception OK, equality between spouses, alcohol is consumed etc. LCA is what I was brought up in whereas HCAC was what my hubby was brought up in.

But even so, even within those different churches, people will obviously have their own opinions of what is right and wrong. My nieces new in-laws are very involved with their church. My niece didn't live with her new husband before she married him - pretty much unheard of here these days, and at the age of 29 it was very unusual that she still lived at home with her parents. She did work though.