Why Do People Defend the Duggars?

[muffynbear]

I'm puzzled. I don't know why there are people that actually buy into the Duggar's image? Can't people see that College Minus! is a scam and that they're never going to let the J'slaves have a real education? There's this article about College Minus! in which the Duggars try to make it seem like it's a real school. I commented several months ago on that article that the Duggars are basically lying about College Minus and this smug woman responded: "It's their business". WTF does that mean? It turns out that this woman is a bible-thumper (based on her profile). I just can't believe that The Duggars have people fooled so easily and people won't bother to question their motives at all. Can't people see that the Duggars are scam artists?

[xDreamerx]

I think a lot of times it's either one of three things, or some combination that prevent people from seeing them realistically. Either a) They are a bible thumper, fundie, fundie-light, or conservative Christian who agrees with them, at least to some degree b) they believe reality TV is real and do no investigating on their own or c) the viewer is liberal in the live and let live sense and because of b) does not see a problem with their beliefs. They figure, "Oh it's not harming anyone. They like it that way." etc.

[darkplumaged]

I find it creepy that a lot of Christian (fundie-light or conservative, but not fundie fundie) bloggers adore them and think that the family is exactly as they appear on TV. They also think the kids are extraordinarily well-behaved. Based on what I've read here (I don't watch the show), I don't think that's true.

I think people get suckered for one simple, superficial reason: the kids are cute. If they were overweight (OK, Josh is, but he's just 1 of 19) or homely, people wouldn't be so charmed by them.

[Guest Anonymous]

I hate when people say, "So what if they have 19 kids? They can afford them so it's nobody else's business". The question is NOT whether Boob and OfBoob can afford their 19, but whether society can afford the descendants of their 19 children. I'm betting that at least 16 of the children will eventually marry and start families. Even if one or two of the children prove to be infertile, that's at least 13 or 14 of them that will produce children of their own. Again, even if a few of them renounce Gothardism and limit themselves to no more than 2 cihildren apiece, the rest will probably have between 5 and 8 children of their own. Maybe they can afford all these kids but the rest of society cannot.

And yes, their beliefs DO harm others. Anyone doubting it need only look at the way of life they subject their daughters to.

I also hate the dimbulbs who say the Duggars are being persecuted because of internet criticism. If someone hacks into their home network and keeps them from loggin onto the internat, that's persecution. If the same some limits him/herself to calling them jerks on the internet, that's not persecution, it's snarkery.

[Sola]

I think it's because a lot of people just take them for what they see on TV. They don't know about, or much less care about the underbelly of fundamentalism which the Duggars are part of.

What you see on TV is the sanitised version. What we discuss here isn't and the Duggars are part of that too.

[lilwriter85]

I think people defend the Duggars for various reasons that have already been mentioned in this thread. I think the people that defend the most are fundie or fundie lite types. A small portion of the Duggar fanbase are naive people who believe anything the Duggars/TLC says and they don't realize how reality TV works. Also some of the naive fans believe that the Duggars are a typical sweet Christian family who don't have any problems. The naive fans are usually the type of people that don't know anything at all about fundies/QF's. They have no idea about the extreme sexism, affiliations with people like the Pearls, poorly designed homeschooling curriculum and other things.

[lilwriter85]

I hate when people say, "So what if they have 19 kids? They can afford them so it's nobody else's business". The question is NOT whether Boob and OfBoob can afford their 19, but whether society can afford the descendants of their 19 children. I'm betting that at least 16 of the children will eventually marry and start families. Even if one or two of the children prove to be infertile, that's at least 13 or 14 of them that will produce children of their own. Again, even if a few of them renounce Gothardism and limit themselves to no more than 2 cihildren apiece, the rest will probably have between 5 and 8 children of their own. Maybe they can afford all these kids but the rest of society cannot.

And yes, their beliefs DO harm others. Anyone doubting it need only look at the way of life they subject their daughters to.

I also hate the dimbulbs who say the Duggars are being persecuted because of internet criticism. If someone hacks into their home network and keeps them from loggin onto the internat, that's persecution. If the same some limits him/herself to calling them jerks on the internet, that's not persecution, it's snarkery.

I also hate when people say stuff like that. I have also seen tons of stuff online in which people praise the Duggars for not being on government assistance. I really don't find the Duggars to be any better than people who are on government assistance. The Duggars in the past received donations from people in their community and without TLC the Duggars wouldn't have extra things like vacations, expensive computers, and they probably would have had debt from Josie's birth. Also I laugh at some of the naive Duggar fans who really think the family has gotten extremely wealthy from the show and the books. The Duggars aren't very lucrative authors in the publishing world. Their reading audience is a bit small and they probably don't sell well when it comes to audiobooks or foreign publication rights. Also the Duggars are probably the least bankable reality show TV family. Their DVD's don't even get decent sales and most people in the entertainment industry don't see the Duggars in the same light as families like the Kardashians.

[Rowan]

I agree with all that has been said and wanted to add that I think that a portion of it is that society values children. So people that make lots of them = really valuable! It doesn't matter that the children have *no* quality of life and aren't valued themselves in the family, all that matters is the large brood of kids.

[Patsy]

I also think some people feel they should for "the principle of the thing". My own experience of this - pro-choicers who think that means you can't disagree with anyone's choices or examine the effects of those choices. They might not personally like the Duggars, but they don't want to allow criticism of them because that wouldn't be properly feminist.

... I disagree, for the record.

[slickcat79]

I also think some people feel they should for "the principle of the thing". My own experience of this - pro-choicers who think that means you can't disagree with anyone's choices or examine the effects of those choices. They might not personally like the Duggars, but they don't want to allow criticism of them because that wouldn't be properly feminist.

... I disagree, for the record.

I disagree also. I am pro-choice, and I would not support a government-imposed limit on how many children a person can have (unless some very weird catastrophic thing happened :?). I don't argue or campaign for laws that would tell Michelle Duggar or anyone else how many children she can have. But it doesn't mean that I can't think her choice is unfairly detrimental to her family. The kids didn't asked to be stacked like cordwood, working like unpaid servants to support their parents' lifestyle.

I'm not sure why more people can't see through their TV "personas" either.

[demgirl]

You know what I find depressing? The show's ratings haven't dropped much since this time last year -- they are hanging steady usually somewhere between 1.2 million to 1.4 million viewers. Every once in a while there seems to be a collective viewing yawn and it drops below one million, but it's usually in that 1.2 - 1.4 range, and has been since August '10. Granted, I think that's a significant drop from their peak, but I, personally, would like to see those numbers on a slow (not super slow) and steady decline.

[Childless]

I feel sorry for those who can't or don't see the Duggars for who they really are. They are being duped.

[Beeks]

I used to defend the Duggers. :oops:

It wasn't that I was naive enough to think Reality TV is real - I knew the story lines and whatnot were faked. I just thought they seemed so sweet and happy and I had no reason to think THAT was faked. It wasn't until I found Gosselins Without Pity and read a few things about the Duggars that I started doing more research and got an inkling of the truth. I'd always lived in very liberal areas of the country and really had no clue what Christian fundamentalism WAS.

For the record, I still don't have a problem with somebody having tons of kids if they can afford them.

[O Latin]

I sometimes defend the Duggars because I feel like a lot of the things they get blasted for are in no way limited to their family or to fundies. Could Josh stand to eat better and exercise? Probably, but so could virtually everyone else in America. I get annoyed when somebody says, "I guess there's not reason to take care of yourself if you're God's chosen people," or something like that. Crappy eating habits are not just a fundie problem. Ditto badly behaved kids, problems getting places on time, placing little value on education, and probably several other things that I can't think of right now. I know the Duggars have opened their lives up to criticism, but when someone makes it sound like only fundies are late for their doctor's appointments, I'm going to step in and defend them.

[Jessica]

Ugh, I fell for their tricks for a while, then I actually started investigating. I had read a website totally grilling them once, before they got their TV show. I finally watched and thought "Well they don't seem THAT bad. That person just doesn't like them because they're Christian Republicans." Then I found out that 14 Children & Pregnant Again! and the other early specials were heavily edited and now you can't find the original and thought "Well that sounds a bit fishy". One of my friends on Facebook just LOOOVES them because they're "a great example of a good, loving Christian family". I want to tell her "Yeah, they might be nice to your face or nice for the cameras but you realize they think you're in a cult and going to hell because not only are you in a cult, you're a divorced single mom in the military, right?" but I don't want to start an argument.

[lilwriter85]

I feel sorry for those who can't or don't see the Duggars for who they really are. They are being duped.

I do feel sorry for some of those people to small extent. I have argued with some Duggar fans on a few other sites and during those arguments I realized that some of those fans will never see the Duggars for who they are. I don't think the Duggars are horrible people and I do find them more likable than people like the Maxwells, Zsuzsu/Steve. The Duggars like to present themselves as the ultra happy family and some people buy into it because they want to seek out forms of TV or things in the media that are feel good.

TLC's editing don't always hide everything that isn't pleasant with the family. There have been several times you could tell the older girls were stressed out by their positions in the family. Also there was episode or it might have been in one of pre series documentaries in which Michelle broke down while doing laundry and then some lady from their town came over and helped them the next day.

[xReems]

TLC wants to portray them as this good Conservative Christian family who live an awesome life, drama free, and everyone is all happy dandy, but most critics know that's not the case. I wish I could find their first documentary before they went crazy and edited a bunch of things out. Their annoying smiles and sweet talks does not fool me the least bit.

Another thing that bothers me is when people defend them for having 19 children. I don't care if you have 19 children or 4 children, that's your life but when you have to use your own children to help you raise the younger ones, that's when I have a problem. They make it sound like as if a buddy system is a good thing but it's not; it's your excuse to go and continue to pop out babies and train your older girls to be a housewife by helping you raise your own kids.

[slickcat79]

TLC wants to portray them as this good Conservative Christian family who live an awesome life, drama free, and everyone is all happy dandy, but most critics know that's not the case. I wish I could find their first documentary before they went crazy and edited a bunch of things out. Their annoying smiles and sweet talks does not fool me the least bit.

I think some of the additional footage is still available. One of the later specials that they did was called Duggar Big Family Album, which featured Jennifer's birth. It may have been what kicked off the original 17K&C. DBFA is basically the original 14 kids special, with some extra updated stuff in it. Some of what they show as the 14 Kids footage is not actually aired in the 14 Kids documentary that is available online. The scene where Michelle goes through and names character traits of the kids is in DBFA, but not in 14 Kids. AFAIK, they still haven't edited out the ATI connection; they might call it a "homeschool conference", but they still have the big sign on the back of the van that says "ATI bound". Anyway, DBFA is available to watch on youtube.

[Feberin]

The Michelle breaking down over the laundry is from their website where she gives tips for mothers not in any special. And the Michelle describing the kids was in the first 14 Kids and the same one is reused in DBFA.

I am always surprised at people who are so unlike the Duggars but LOVE them. I get fundies or fundie-lites being all pro-Duggar that makes sense to me. Recently on facebook one of the cloth diaper people I"m fans of put up something about the Duggars having a new grandson and that Anna uses cloth diapers. I expected at least one overpopulation comment because it seems to me that a lot of cloth diapers fall into the very liberal and caring about the Earth type people. Nope just comment after comment saying how awesome the Duggars are and way to go Anna on the cloth diapers even though in that same episode she says she drives a Hummer!

[bananacat]

I agree with everyone who pointed out that the vast majority of people are completely naive about how unrealistic reality tv is. Most people think cameras follow people around and it is shown just as it is, with little editing of content and no staged scenes.

[lilwriter85]

TLC wants to portray them as this good Conservative Christian family who live an awesome life, drama free, and everyone is all happy dandy, but most critics know that's not the case. I wish I could find their first documentary before they went crazy and edited a bunch of things out. Their annoying smiles and sweet talks does not fool me the least bit.

Another thing that bothers me is when people defend them for having 19 children. I don't care if you have 19 children or 4 children, that's your life but when you have to use your own children to help you raise the younger ones, that's when I have a problem. They make it sound like as if a buddy system is a good thing but it's not; it's your excuse to go and continue to pop out babies and train your older girls to be a housewife by helping you raise your own kids.[/quote]

I agree that is what bothers me about the Duggars. I once got into an argument with a woman on another site. I made the comment that I thought the buddy system the family used was too much and she argued back with me that the buddy system isn't new and that several families use it. I have always been aware that forms of the buddy system have been used in the past. My mother was the youngest of 8 children in a ranching family. Her family used the buddy system at times because my grandparents had several ranch duties. My grandparents encouraged their children to go out and make lives for themselves when they became of age. My four aunts all left home and two of them attended trade schools, established careers and married. My mom grew up in the 50's and 60's and back then there were less opportunities for young women.

I posted back to that women on that forum, that the Duggars' buddy system is pretty backwards for today.. The girls are caring too much for younger siblings and they also aren't learning other life skills. I can understand the use of buddy systems in the past especially in families that were involved in agriculture/ranching. The Duggars buddy system is only beneficial to Boob and Mullet and the younger kids do hurt as a result they are being taught by their older sisters and they have sometimes sign up for one on one time with Mullet.

[yearning4freedom]

I used to defend the Duggers. :oops:

For the record, I still don't have a problem with somebody having tons of kids if they can afford them.

Me too Beeks. On the other hand I see how the J'slaves are treated & how women are told to behave. Not cool.

[Beeks]

Me too Beeks. On the other hand I see how the J'slaves are treated & how women are told to behave. Not cool.

Exactly - I have a MUCH bigger problem with that than how many of them there are. It sucks in the sense that they are creating lots more people who will think like they do, but I still have some hope for at least a few of the kids to eventually rebel and live somewhat normal lives. Can't wait for the tell-all book ;-)

[yearning4freedom]

Exactly - I have a MUCH bigger problem with that than how many of them there are. It sucks in the sense that they are creating lots more people who will think like they do, but I still have some hope for at least a few of the kids to eventually rebel and live somewhat normal lives. Can't wait for the tell-all book ;-)

I will be reading that for sure! There's so much going on behind the scenes then we're told.

[Aurora]

Any ideas for titles? I'm picturing Terror Among the Tater Tots: Deconstructing the Duggars. :)