Blog:Do You Love Children

[roddma]

Another Quiverfulll blog blabbing about the evils of birth control

thatmom.com/2011/11/21/quiverfull-movement-part-two-do-you-love-children-2/comment-page-1/#comment-22960

[ladypuglover]

Is there a link or a blog name we could google ourselves? I just tried but found nothing under a blog called Do You Love Children.

[Angri-la]

I googled "that mom love children", and it was the 2nd link down.

[Cerysbell]

I had a look at the site and I thought she had some sensible things to say, asides from that particular post. if you read part one of that series, although she is anti permanent birth control, what she considers abortifacient BC and abortion, she is not a fan of what she describes as the militant fecundity movement. She denounces the Pearls and if you look at the side bars, she says, right at the bottom that she believes that many of the false teachings in the patrio-centric movement are in direct opposition to Scripture. Someone has commented on the Do You Love Children post to ask if she would be okay with NFP or condoms, given that she doesn't directly decry them in the article. I will be really interested to see what she says.

[roddma]

oops here is the correct link http://www.thatmom.com/2011/11/21/quive ... hildren-2/

[alba]

I kind of want to comment and tell her that no, I don't love children and, while they are a blessing to many people, they aren't by nature a blessing. I wonder what she'd say.

[fundiefan]

I kind of want to comment and tell her that no, I don't love children and, while they are a blessing to many people, they aren't by nature a blessing. I wonder what she'd say.

Yeah, that. No, in general, I do not love children any differently than I love any other human being on the planet.

I love the children of my family like, well, like family. I love them as children and when they grow up.

I love the children of my friends the same as I love those of my family.

Overall though, I do not love children as if they are all some entity all their own. They are not one thing, each child is an individual. Some I like, some I love, some I cringe when I have to be around them, most others are just there like everyone else.

[2xx1xy1JD]

I had a mixed reaction to her post.

It's a bit wordy and garbled. Maybe that's because I'm just reading part 2 of a 4 part series, but it wasn't really clear until the comments that she's not automatically against all forms of birth control.

After reading it over some more, I think she's saying that abortion is bad, birth control that prevents implantation is bad, permanent birth control can leave you with regrets BUT using something like NFP or breastfeeding that aims to prevent conception is a private matter between husband and wife. Beyond that, she seems to be pointing out a difference in attitude, saying that you should have children because you love children, as oppose to simply not using birth control because you believe that doing anything to prevent conception = abortion.

Now, parts of the post still bugged me, because the main post makes the false statement that the birth doesn't prevent conception but prevents implantation. No, the combination pill prevents ovulation and thickens the cervical mucous to prevent sperm from getting through. If there is no conception, the fact that the uterus is less hospitable to implantation is irrelevant, since there is no fertilized egg to implant.

I wish she would have also written about how someone who loves children can also be so sensitive to the need to treat children as precious gifts from G-d that they would not want to create a situation in which a child wouldn't be treated that way. For example, a parent may recognize that they have physical, mental or emotional issues that prevent them from parenting effectively, or recognize that they don't have the best home situation, or feel that their children need parents who aren't overwhelmed, and plan accordingly. If you think of children as being like flowers, you plant them in a spot where they will get what they need and have proper space to grow.

[kayray]

I kind of want to comment and tell her that no, I don't love children and, while they are a blessing to many people, they aren't by nature a blessing. I wonder what she'd say.

I want to say, yes, I do, especially when paired with a nice glass of wine.

I don't "love children". There are children in my life I love greatly. There are many children I don't know at all, therefore cannot feel love in the way I think of love. I have also met some children who I did not like at all. I can care about the welfare of them, however.

I do care about ensuring that unwanted children, or children who cannot be taken care of, are not brought into the world.

I also do not want children. I am incredibly thankful to live in a time and place where such methods to prevent pregnancy exist, so I can exercise my choice not to have children. So I love my birth control more than any hypothetical child.

[Angri-la]

kayray:

I want to say, yes, I do, especially when paired with a nice glass of wine.

Bwahahaha! Love it. I adore my daughter, and some children, but I am not going to pretend I love the snot nosed brat that pulled my kid's hair in the park and said she was ugly, and the kid's father did not make her apologize, even after I intervened. I told that little creature: "Ugly is as ugly does", and sounded just like my mother. (aaah!) Jerks are made, not born, but some learn really quickly.

[alba]

I want to say, yes, I do, especially when paired with a nice glass of wine.

Haha!

I've got pretty much the same opinion of children as you do. I don't see them as special in any way, and while I've loved my younger siblings their entire lives I didn't like them until they hit adolescence, but I view children as a vulnerable group of people who therefore require protection and who should be treated with respect.

And, yes, I'm happily childfree.

[Seven Severn]

I can honestly say that I've never loved children. When my nieces and nephews were young I didn't love them; they were just there. I now have several great nieces and nephews and I feel the same way. Like pretty much everyone I think they need to be protected and properly cared for (and back legislation that does that) and certainly hope that their parents love them, but no, I do not love children. I'm okay with that.

[Hane]

Word to all of the above. Saying "I love all children" is as stupid as saying "I love all humans."

[Terrie]

Word to all of the above. Saying "I love all children" is as stupid as saying "I love all humans."

This. "Children" is a rather abstract concept to me. I wish them no particular harm and all the best, just as I would for any random group of people I've never met, but beyond that, I can't say much about them .

[AnnoDomini]

My mother LOOOVES children. I've recounted the tale of how touching a baby's head made her cry (she's menopausal and has 10 children) and last night I heard her talking to my sister comparing her love for babies to an addiction.

[clibbyjo]

Meh, I love MY children,but I am just fond everyone elses. :dance: I don't really like or love many people in general,so I am not going to love everyone just because someone else thinks I should.I am not even going to pretend, there are some real brats I cannot stand. I will do anything for a child in need of course,but I would do that regardless of if I had feelings for them or not.

[lilwriter85]

Yeah, that. No, in general, I do not love children any differently than I love any other human being on the planet.

I love the children of my family like, well, like family. I love them as children and when they grow up.

I love the children of my friends the same as I love those of my family.

Overall though, I do not love children as if they are all some entity all their own. They are not one thing, each child is an individual. Some I like, some I love, some I cringe when I have to be around them, most others are just there like everyone else.

That is how I feel. I love the children of family and friends but I don't love them differently than adults, because they will not stay children forever.

[Kitchen Princess]

I love all children. I don't know how to say it any other way. I hate the way people in some children's lives don't take care of them or give them the love or nurturing they require to be lovely people. But I still love them.

[emmiedahl]

My mother LOOOVES children. I've recounted the tale of how touching a baby's head made her cry (she's menopausal and has 10 children) and last night I heard her talking to my sister comparing her love for babies to an addiction.

Your mother does not love children. She likes the hormonal cocktail that explodes in her body when she has physical contact with an infant. We have all read extensively about her lack of love and concern for her children.

[aggythenostic]

Happily childfree here. Don't love children. Don't even like most children all that much, but that is typically about the parents. [i love dogs though. Does that count?] But the thing that sticks out for me is this constant harping on the idea that some birth control methods are 'abortions.' NO THEY ARE NOT. This has been debunked many times. The pill does not cause abortions! Please, fundies. What's next? Imprisoning boys for jerking off and spilling their precious seed?

[Austin]

Meh, I love MY children,but I am just fond everyone elses. :dance: I don't really like or love many people in general,so I am not going to love everyone just because someone else thinks I should.I am not even going to pretend, there are some real brats I cannot stand. I will do anything for a child in need of course,but I would do that regardless of if I had feelings for them or not.

This is right where I am. I love MY children, but really never went out of my way to spend time with other children. I never babysat as a teen, and other people's kids tend to get on my nerves over long periods of time. I was always happy to welcome our sons' friends, but admit to being happy to see them go home, too, sometimes.

I would certainly help any child in need, and believe that ALL children deserve a fair shot in life.

[emmyfair]

I love my kids, but I'm not really a kid person, you know? I'm sure a kitten died or something when I wrote that....

[emmiedahl]

Liking or loving children is a personal preference, not a moral issue. One can dislike children and be an awesome person, or love them to death and be a monster.

[StarrieEyedKat]

I love my kids, but I'm not really a kid person, you know? I'm sure a kitten died or something when I wrote that....

That's me too. My kids are my life and I love them more than anything. Other kids? Meh, they usually just mildly irritate me if I'm around them too long.

[pixydust]

I love my 3 kids & my unloved little niece "A" (seriously, if my SIL called me right now and asked me to adopt her daughter I would say yes without a thought... my hubby and I have even talked about it), I loved most of my siblings when they were kids. Most kids? I like them. I tend to like kids until they give me a reason not to (like my nephews, they are evil), but loving my kids and liking most kids doesn't mean that I need to have a lot of them, I know my limits emotionally, physically, financially, and housing wise. I think that it shows love to know this, and live by it.