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Lockwood Family update!


quiversR4hunting

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So over on the JRod thread @Georgiana mentioned the bus mission the Lockwood's did down in Mexico.

Well that meant I had to go and see if Jayne updated her blog. Her previous updated was in fall 2016. Well low and behold she updated 5 days ago! https://lockwoodfamily.blogspot.com/

Run down- they moved to Redding, 4 bedroom house. Daniel works for his brother in the office of the construction company. They joined Shasta Baptist Church and they have a school so Jayne homeschools the kids under the Shasta church. The kids are doing a lot of stuff with the kids at the church school. The older kids are going to college and working real jobs (not grifting). One kid married this past June, another has a serious girlfriend at Pensacola (where they both attend) and the girl that graduated is working full time at a preschool/day care and plans college next year (did you read that Rods, Duggars, Maxwell's, etc).  One of the daughters at home volunteers on the bus ministry at the church. <sigh> Jayne has posted a few new pictures up on the blog too.

Still no word on why they got kicked out of Mexico.

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I do have a super soft spot for Jaynee and check in on her fb periodically, most recently to see if they were directly affected by the CA wildfires near Redding (they weren't; no evacuation). I knew the oldest had a sweetheart, so that must have been the June wedding. He was studying to be (no surprise) a missionary!  I think because Daniel has a real job and doesn't rely on grifting, the kids all have birth certificates and the Lockwoods aren't some whacked out, no SSNs Sovereign Citizens. They belong to a conservative but normal church, the kids can have friends,  normal aspirations and integrate into the community and have real jobs.  So glad to hear they are all doing well. I think both Jaynee and Daniel have many extended family members in the general area. 

Edited by Howl
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Jaynee Lockwood is sweet, but this family has did a metric fuckton of questionable things down in Mexico under the guise of "ministry".  Also, her glorification in her "bouquet" of blonde-haired, blue-eyed white children was somewhere between extremely problematic to overtly racist.  I know a lot of people give her a pass, but I don't.  She participated in and perpetuated a lot of directly harmful programs and ideology, and she absolutely should be held accountable for her "missionary" work in Mexico.

I just hope the husband's indiscretions were financial in nature, and that there isn't some poor child that the family ran from growing up without at least the financial support of their father.  

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So her son got out his phone and took a selfie at the altar while getting his first kiss? 

I still think he cheated on her and it wasn't something they could cover up. The way they were quickly whisked out of there and dumped by every church makes it obvious he did something very bad. 

Jaynee came here once while they were still in Mexico and while she does seem sweet she also was the one trying to remove birth control from women in poverty while in Mexico because she felt they should keep having children even if they couldn't feed the ones they had and/or didn't want anymore children. 

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5 minutes ago, formergothardite said:

Jaynee came here once while they were still in Mexico and while she does seem sweet she also was the one trying to remove birth control from women in poverty while in Mexico because she felt they should keep having children even if they couldn't feed the ones they had and/or didn't want anymore children. 

I will never forget that she encouraged women in domestic violence situations to NOT take advantage of the government-backed programs that were offering multi-pronged assistance in getting out because those programs advocated for birth control, empowering women to be financially self-sufficient, and separating from their (violent and abusive) husbands.  That's right, this woman encouraged poverty stricken women trapped in situations of actual violence to STAY TRAPPED WITH THEIR ABUSERS and simply HAVE MORE KIDS.  

It's very possible that people may have actually died because of Jaynee Lockwood.  And they may have gotten out if her idiot ass hadn't come to Mexico to meddle in matters she didn't understand but felt qualified to lead on because she was a special AMERICAN WHITE PROTESTANT CHRISTIAN.  

Also, her church had a nasty habit of ONLY offering services to those who attended their events.  There were multiple times where Jaynee indirectly mentioned that food and other necessities were only available to those who were members of their community in good standing.  These people withheld food, toys, and necessities from CHILDREN unless they were the "right kind of Christian".

She may not have been actively malicious, but Jaynee Lockwood did some real dirty deeds in Mexico.  

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Many fundies, maybe even most fundies can be "sweet" people.  My SAHD cousins are truly kind, thoughtful, and sweet. Most fundies aren't Steven Anderson. However, it takes more than good intentions to do actual good. Many fundie missionaries are offering "a cup of poison" to drink from with only the best of intentions and no malice. They 100% believe they offer you a cup ofeverlasting life to drink from. 

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Oh shit, they don't live too far from my son and his GF. I freaking hope they don't go "soulwinning"...#2son would give them an ear full. 

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I think also our perception of the Lockwoods is a bit skewed by how we initially perceived them.  When the Lockwoods' blog was active, things like "White Savior Complex" and how many "mission" works are actually destructive/harmful/less than beneficial to the local communities was not as widely understood.  We looked at the Lockwoods through the lens we had at the time, which was heavily flawed IN THEIR FAVOR.  We missed some of the ways in which their ministry was deeply harmful to local communities, though we did call them out on much of it, and we didn't fully appreciate the degree to which they displayed racist ideals.  

They never were very far from John-boy Schrader, if we're being honest, and if their blog came around today, our impressions of Jaynee especially would be VERY different. I'm actually very curious to see how they are read by members who may be just now encountering them.  

It's also tempting to fall into the aggressor/victim dichotomy and to assume that because Jaynee is obviously a victim of the Patriarchy and her dirt-bag of a husband, that she cannot be aggressively victimizing others.  This is false.  She could, and she definitely did.  And that's not even to get in how she very frequently seemed to use race to make herself feel superior to the locals in Mexico.

Jaynee was both a tragic victim who almost lost her life to the QF ideology and a husband who cares more about himself and his ideals than her health, AND an active victimizer who used her power and position to harm vulnerable people all so she could add another soul to her tally and feel better about her personal choice to stay in her terrible and likely abusive marriage.  So often, we respond to abuse by attempting to normalize it by inflicting it on others.  That is what Jaynee did.  Her response to being victimized by an abusive ideology was to throw the whole weight of her being behind inflicting that ideology on others.  It's what many fundie wives do.  And while understandable, it is not OK.

Jaynee would probably be WONDERFUL to you if she met you in the US.  But if you were a poor woman in rural Mexico suffering from domestic abuse, she would tell you to stay with your husband and pop out babies until either you died or Jesus worked a miracle in your husband's heart.  She would tell you NOT to take the lifeline the government is offering you.  She would tell you to risk starvation for yourself and your children rather than work....and then she would likely DENY YOU AND YOUR KIDS FOOD unless you played along with their church.  That's not very sweet at all.  Frankly, that's vile.  

Jaynee's only sweet if you've got enough of your own power and privilege that she has no other option.  If you're vulnerable, you should stay far away.  She'll sacrifice your life to help justify the fact that she stays in hers.   

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1) the parents sound horrible and I doubt there’s any hope for them.

2) but I will holdout hope for their children. If they are actually working real jobs and mingling with other kids in the church school, there may be hope for them just yet.

3) her son and new DIL look like they are no more than 16. 

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2 hours ago, feministxtian said:

Oh shit, they don't live too far from my son and his GF. I freaking hope they don't go "soulwinning"...#2son would give them an ear full. 

Please have him record it if he ever runs into them and then give us a warning so we can pop popcorn :popcorn2:and pour some drinks. (If your son is like you on here, I really want this to happen) ?

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3 minutes ago, quiversR4hunting said:

Please have him record it if he ever runs into them and then give us a warning so we can pop popcorn :popcorn2:and pour some drinks. (If your son is like you on here, I really want this to happen) ?

Let's just say the 3 little apples didn't fall far from the tree. He has a brain and a mouth and he's not afraid to use either one. He'll tell me if he gets "visited" and probably be laughing his ass off how he twisted them inside out and upside down. 

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2 hours ago, Georgiana said:

They never were very far from John-boy Schrader, if we're being honest

This is a good point. I am looking back at their blog and I had not realized that they crammed a whole bunch of children in a travel trailer while before they got a house. At least they had a church building to go to during the day. 

I had also forgotten that it reads like they let one of their newborn babies go for 10 days not wanting to eat and wanting to sleep all the time before they took him to the hospital. 

And they hung out with the Maxwells!

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From there we travelled to Kansas where we were priveleged to spend an entire day with a family that we have come to really appreciate... the Maxwells. We learned about them through a book that was given to us from a home schooling family at our church..."Preparing Sons to be Fathers of Single Income Homes." (I highly recommend it) 

They were on deputation at that time and I wonder if they were hoping to get some support from Steve. I don't see Steve doing that. 

https://lockwoodfamily.blogspot.com/2006/09/going-back-east.html

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Just now, formergothardite said:

This is a good point. I am looking back at their blog and I had not realized that they crammed a whole bunch of children in a travel trailer while before they got a house. At least they had a church building to go to during the day. 

I had also forgotten that it reads like they let one of their newborn babies go for 10 days not wanting to eat and wanting to sleep all the time before they took him to the hospital. 

And they hung out with the Maxwells!

They were on deputation at that time and I wonder if they were hoping to get some support from Steve. I don't see Steve doing that. 

https://lockwoodfamily.blogspot.com/2006/09/going-back-east.html

Yeah, there's a whole subset of "missionaries" that I think go to poor areas simply so they can have a way to support a mega-family without the inconvenience of having to work hard.  Even fundies know kids are expensive, and some QF patriarchs turn up their noses at having to work their tails off to support their ever-growing brood but still being forced to go without because kids are so dang costly.  An easy way to get around this is to declare yourself a "missionary".  That allows you to go to a poor area of the world where you can live better than everyone else around you so you get to feel superior, any time you go without you are glorified for your sacrifice, and you can live off donations instead of having to work long hours.  Poor or struggling in the US are often vilified, especially by these groups.  Missionaries are praised.  It's a loophole I think appealed to both Lockwood and Schrader.  

I don't believe for one moment that either were motivated by genuine concern for anyone other than themselves.  They just wanted to look good and remaining in the US would have shown them too obviously for what they were.

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Odd detail.  Daniel is a fluent Spanish speaker, but I'm not sure Jaynee ever was.  She mentioned something on her blog that made me think this.  Does anyone remember?  I certainly hope at least the older kids developed Spanish fluency. 

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18 hours ago, Georgiana said:

Yeah, there's a whole subset of "missionaries" that I think go to poor areas simply so they can have a way to support a mega-family without the inconvenience of having to work hard.  Even fundies know kids are expensive, and some QF patriarchs turn up their noses at having to work their tails off to support their ever-growing brood but still being forced to go without because kids are so dang costly.  An easy way to get around this is to declare yourself a "missionary".  That allows you to go to a poor area of the world where you can live better than everyone else around you so you get to feel superior, any time you go without you are glorified for your sacrifice, and you can live off donations instead of having to work long hours.  Poor or struggling in the US are often vilified, especially by these groups.  Missionaries are praised.  It's a loophole I think appealed to both Lockwood and Schrader.  

I don't believe for one moment that either were motivated by genuine concern for anyone other than themselves.  They just wanted to look good and remaining in the US would have shown them too obviously for what they were.

I agree. It’s extremely hypocritical because these people are often the same people who look down on families in the US using government assistance. Yet the majority of people on government assistance are working some sort of job. Unlike the professional grifters.

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Meh.  @Georgiana, I don't think FJ (as a whole) has changed all that much or become a lot more sophisticated when it comes to understanding how destructive missionaries like Jaynee and Daniel can be.  I wish it were.  Some of us old timers are still educating on that front - when a few new members get a bit sentimental about missionaries.  I see that mostly on the Duggar and Bates fora, however. 

As far as comparisons go:  I follow quite a few missionaries but not many of them hold FJ's attention for long.  I think Shrader and JRod hold our attention because their grifting and narcissism is so OTT.  There are plenty of other mockable ones out there.  And probably many just as damaging as Shrader who don't let it all hang out on blogs and Facebook.

We didn't start following the Lockwoods until they had already made landfall in Mexico, IIRC.  So we missed their pop-up trailer Deputation, which we now know is quite commonplace.   I did know the Maxwell connection but I not sure when I first noticed it.

I remember calling out Jaynee and Daniel a lot for shenanigans back on yuku when they were still in Mexico.  Daniel and Jaynee both visited FJ when we were being extremely critical - and were very worried about Jaynee during her final pregnancy. 

They were crafty though.  Instead of telling us we were all going to hell they thanked us for our concern, reassured us that Jaynee was fine after her emergency hysterectomy,  and told us we were sad and damaged people.  They promised to pray for us.  

I found it condescending, but FJ in general was kinder to them after that.  And perhaps too kind to Jaynee, who definitely did her fair share of damage in Mexico, and possibly did no favors to her children by staying in the marriage to Daniel.  I don't know.

A visit from a "nice" Fundie to FJ doesn't mean that they are wonderful people whose beliefs are not damaging.  I'm sure many of them are "nice" in person but it should be their beliefs and the actions caused by those beliefs that we critique.  And we should not stop the criticism because they seem "nice."

That said, a Fundie visit is always a salutary reminder that the people we snark on are real human beings with real feelings.  I have a personal rule that I try never to write anything here I would not say to someone's face.  I don't always succeed but I try. 

Edited by Palimpsest
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2 hours ago, Palimpsest said:

A visit from a "nice" Fundie to FJ doesn't mean that they are wonderful people whose beliefs are not damaging.  I'm sure many of them are "nice" in person but it should be their beliefs and the actions caused by those beliefs that we critique.  And we should not stop the criticism because they seem "nice."

This. When you consider that a majority of the so-called missionaries we have followed here are grifting working in areas where many if not nearly all are already Christian (= Catholic or another flavor of Protestantism), their activities can only be seen as arrogant and stupid at best, highly damaging at worst. That goes double for Jaynee & Daniel.

Seems to me that most fundie visits to FJ fall into two classes: fundies who come here in high dudgeon, stung by & outraged at the snark; or, fundies who come here because the FJ snark has damaged or could damage their "business model," whether it's god-bothering while grifting or peddling snake essential oils or whatever else they're up to.

 

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There is just so much "white saviour" complex inherent in missions work. So much. To tell an entire people group that they have "spiritual darkness" in their hearts is heinous,cruel, and all the bad words, all of them. 

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On 10/10/2018 at 11:28 AM, hoipolloi said:

Seems to me that most fundie visits to FJ fall into two classes: fundies who come here in high dudgeon, stung by & outraged at the snark; or, fundies who come here because the FJ snark has damaged or could damage their "business model," whether it's god-bothering while grifting or peddling snake essential oils or whatever else they're up to.

And at least one more. I knew one who came here to debate, got some snark but also some thoughtful answers.

That particular ex-fundie broke free and is courageously (my word, not theirs) living their own, non-fundie life even though it meant leaving almost everything and everyone they loved behind.

They came back at one point and were met with a lot of skepticism, but I can tell you, without revealing any more detail for their sake, that their change was real.

So, thanks, some of you FJers, for responding thoughtfully. I think you might have made a difference.

Edited by refugee
Odd autocorrect
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On ‎10‎/‎9‎/‎2018 at 8:34 AM, Howl said:

Odd detail.  Daniel is a fluent Spanish speaker, but I'm not sure Jaynee ever was.  She mentioned something on her blog that made me think this.  Does anyone remember?  I certainly hope at least the older kids developed Spanish fluency. 

I don't think the children learned to speak Spanish. There was something in the blog one time about it, can't recall exactly what Jaynee said, but I remember being shocked that the children were not fluent. Such a wasted opportunity to easily learn the language! For some reason I think that maybe the two oldest boys, Timothy and Elijah, might know Spanish-I think they may have gone out with Daniel on visitations or some such activity. 

I think the Lockwood children were at home a lot and saw other children mostly at church on Sundays. I don't think they were out playing in the neighborhood after school with the local children. There might have been Catholics among them!

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Yes, that seems right.  And I remember being appalled at the time that the kids weren't integrating with the neighborhood and Jaynee and the kids weren't studying Spanish, which makes you wonder why they were there in the first place. 

Maybe it was all Daniel's idea and J. was along for the ride, because wife. 

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35 minutes ago, Howl said:

Yes, that seems right.  And I remember being appalled at the time that the kids weren't integrating with the neighborhood and Jaynee and the kids weren't studying Spanish, which makes you wonder why they were there in the first place. 

Maybe it was all Daniel's idea and J. was along for the ride, because wife. 

I can see it being all his idea for them not learn Spanish. 

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On 10/11/2018 at 4:18 PM, refugee said:

And at least one more. I knew one who came here to debate, got some snark but also some thoughtful answers.

Thanks for saying that.  This is why I don't believe on viciously attacking visiting Fundies on sight, and that did happen occasionally in the bad old days.  I do see the point of calmly debating them and challenging their misconceptions.  A shout out to @formergothardite for being especially good at that, but we have many others.

And, off the top of my head, I can think of four people who have (either publicly or privately by PM) returned to FJ to update us on their progress out of Fundiedom and to say that we at least made them think.   I don't think FJ gets the credit - that belongs to them - but it is nice to know we have helped at least a few people.

6 hours ago, Letgo said:

I think that maybe the two oldest boys, Timothy and Elijah, might know Spanish-I think they may have gone out with Daniel on visitations or some such activity. 

Yes, those two did do some visitations with Dad  as they grew older.  As far as I remember the children were only allowed to mingle with known parishioners, and the boys worked on building the church.  The children also helped Jaynee deliver Operation Christmas Child shoe boxes (but only to approved right-kind-of- Christian children) and that is about it.

I think everyone has read my rants about OCC before so I'll spare you this time.

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