I feel sad for Anna T

[slh12280]

Her latest post is about her fear of getting pregnant again just like last time :(

http://ccostello.blogspotDOTcom/

[Beeks]

If she hates hospitals so much why doesn't she home birth??

[fundiefan]

I totally got that she is scared of becoming pregnant again, plain and simple. But, being who she is, she is not so thinly veiling that fear in yet another rant about the terribly, mean, intrusive, inconvenient medical system / hospitals. She really does beat a dead horse. She tore up the docs and hospitals after each kid. The third isn't even on the way yet; is the preemptive? Does it mean she won't go on and on about their evils when number 3 actually is on the way?

[Jade]

I would hate to be the nurse that has to take care of her in the hospital.

She is already overwhelmed with 2 kids, I don't know how she will handle a large family.

[Not That Kind of Dr]

I'm a little surprised that she's so open about her dread of becoming pregnant again. She doesn't even couch her concern in terms of, "Oh, it is hard, but the rewards ultimately outweigh the costs."

[tabitha2]

She is a miserable,depressing individual.

[ladypuglover]

ccostello.blogspot.com/ for those who can not work with DOTS

[lilah]

I don't get it, are homebirths illegal in israel?

[Not That Kind of Dr]

A little OT, but has anyone ever figured out why Anna T.'s blog URL starts ccostello? That's a pretty random choice for an Orthodox Jew living in Israel, right? It just doesn't seem to have any connection to what she's told her readers about herself.

[defrauding]

I love that she goes on a self-centered rant about hospitals at the same time doctors and nurses are on strike in Israel because they're grossly overworked and underpaid.

Edit: Not That Kind of Dr, she used to go by "Celena Costello"; hence, the URL. It may or may not be her actual name.

[Not That Kind of Dr]

Thanks, Defrauding. I've been reading her blog for years at this point, but I guess not quite long enough to have seen her call herself Celena Costello. Strange.

[YPestis]

For those asking about home births, she wrote in past posts that she thought about it but is wary. She lives about 1 hr drive from the nearest hospital. She said her husband is concerned that if something goes "wrong", they would not have enough time to get her to a hospital. Actually a reasonable fear.

The other issue is cost. Anna T has complained that midwives are extremely expensive in Israel and, as stated in her recent post, the ones she may be able to afford may provide marginal care.

A third issue is something to do with husband not touching their wives during births or something...? She mentioned something to that affect once. Not sure what it means. Maybe someone Jewish can elaborate. However, this is a minor issue. I believe the first two are the major reasons she is readying herself for another hospital stay.

Anyways, Anna T has shown her extreme dislike of doctors and hospitals over and over again. Someone pointed out she really shouldn't hate on a system that is providing her with care that she is not providing on her own. Israel has a national health care system which Anna T utilizes for her deliveries. Anna T replied that her wonderfully intelligent husband has explained to her that if the evil government would just give them back the taxes they paid into the system, she would be able to afford wonderful midwives and hospital care if needed on private, self-paid insurance.

I guess she has never lived in the US. I am not an advocate for one payer system, but a simple glance of her family finances indicates had she lived in the US, her family would probably get most of their taxes back in refunds and still NOT be able to afford private insurance on their own. I mean, how many people scrapping by such as her are able to afford private health care in this country? I guess the grass is always greener.

I actually read her post and thought her dread of hospitals is really a mask for her dread of a third child. Anna T has often talked about how "exhausting" doing this and that is, her enjoyment of naps, and how horrible her life was when she was forced to work TWO DAYS out of a week while her unemployed husband is at home with their infant daughter. If she has so little energy that even a two day/week job with an infant and unemployed husband exhaust her, I can't imagine three kids under the age of 5 will do (or 5 kids under the age of 7...).

[darkplumaged]

If she is so concerned about becoming pregnant soon, why doesn't she go to her rabbi and get a heter (a dispensation, in this case to prevent pregnancy)? Why must she pretend that she's obligated to do the QF thing?

If she does want to have more children but just dreads the birth process, there must be something she can do to ensure that things go the way she wants them to go. The thing is, her expectations are very high--not that they shouldn't be, but they're very specific and apparently not in line with SOP at Israeli hospitals--and she is not at all resilient. So maybe there is no way she will ever be satisfied with a birth experience.

[Clementine]

Anna T must suffer from depression or have some kind of neurophsychiatric disorder. No healthy person can be that exhausted all the time.

I’m afraid of unfeeling, uncaring health care that will pressure me into having expensive, invasive, time-consuming procedures and check-ups – far away from my home, far more than is necessary, which will drain my limited energy and disrupt my home life and the routine of our whole family.

[Guest Anonymous]

I actually read her post and thought her dread of hospitals is really a mask for her dread of a third child. Anna T has often talked about how "exhausting" doing this and that is, her enjoyment of naps, and how horrible her life was when she was forced to work TWO DAYS out of a week while her unemployed husband is at home with their infant daughter. If she has so little energy that even a two day/week job with an infant and unemployed husband exhaust her, I can't imagine three kids under the age of 5 will do (or 5 kids under the age of 7...).

Yes, I thought exactly this too. She seems to be deely depressed and fearful, and since her religion does not allow her to see children as anything but a 'blessing', she projects her dread feelings onto the healthcare system instead.

Everytime, I start to feel sorry for Anna, she tends to show her true, hateful, colours in her comments to her readers. This entry is no exception.

As an aside, did anyone notice Coffee Catholic/Farm Hijabi Michelle pipe up in the comments - again proclaiming the evils of the NHS that has forked out most generously for her 3 births to date? Michelle is somone for whom I have a little more empathy than Anna, but I'd dearly love to slap her when she starts bashing a national health service to which she has personally contributed nothing, and yet has received more than most.

[Sola]

As an aside, did anyone notice Coffee Catholic/Farm Hijabi Michelle pipe up in the comments - again proclaiming the evils of the NHS that has forked out most generously for her 3 births to date? Michelle is somone for whom I have a little more empathy than Anna, but I'd dearly love to slap her when she starts bashing a national health service to which she has personally contributed nothing, and yet has received more than most.

Yeah, I noticed too. I cannot understand why Michelle stated she had to go 200 miles away from home to give birth. She lives on Orkney and there are three hospitals on Orkney, one of them is a maternity unit. At the very most she would have had to travel 10 to 15 miles from her home.

Now on the NHS you can choose which hospital you give birth in, so it is possible she choose one on the mainland, as was her right, but if that is the case, why moan about how far away it was? And if she had asked the midwives, she could have had as many pads as she wanted. Each bay on a ward will have a cupboard which contains maternity pads, breast pads, cot sheets, nappies and bed mats for you to help yourself to.

[easternabeille]

Yeah, I noticed too. I cannot understand why Michelle stated she had to go 200 miles away from home to give birth. She lives on Orkney and there are three hospitals on Orkney, one of them is a maternity unit. At the very most she would have had to travel 10 to 15 miles from her home.

Now on the NHS you can choose which hospital you give birth in, so it is possible she choose one on the mainland, as was her right, but if that is the case, why moan about how far away it was? And if she had asked the midwives, she could have had as many pads as she wanted. Each bay on a ward will have a cupboard which contains maternity pads, breast pads, cot sheets, nappies and bed mats for you to help yourself to.

I kind of understand where Michelle is coming from (not the complaining part!) in that it was necessary for her to travel to the mainland to give birth. I have a friend living in Lerwick in the Shetland Islands. After becoming pregnant with her second child her doctor on the island advised her to go to Aberdeen to have her child due to the complications she had with her first child (which she had before she moved to the island). The doctor's reasoning was that the hospital, while great, did not have the resources needed. However as an American living in the UK I have to say the NHS totally rocks and I hate reading Michelle complain about it!

[bea]

I'd have more sympathy for Anna T. if she weren't trying to dictate her own lifestyle be followed by everyone else, you know? A lifestyle she's not actually LIVED.

It's just another example of someone who finds reality harder than her idealized dreams of it. Come on, now, Anna T. was extolling the virtues of marriage before she was married, of being a stay-at-home wife when she was working, lecturing all of us about the importance of multiple children before she had any kids, on the ease of pregnancy before she was pregnant, on the importance of homeschooling before she's even got a kid out of diapers. Now that she's actually in the thick of it, now that she's dealing with multiple pregnancies and birth and childraising and financial issues and keeping a house to her own exacting standards while chasing kids, she's discovering what a lot of people already knew - it's harder than you think it's going to be. Which is why the rest of us, like sensible people, avoid having blogs advising other people on how to live a life we haven't lived ourselves.

Anna T. is discovering something a lot of people have learned - some times? Real life is harder than you think it's going to be. The problem is, she (and a lot of other fundie bloggers) is incapable of saying "Whoa, whoa, back up a minute here, this has ended up being WAY harder than I'd thought, maybe I should be a little less dismissive of well-founded and kindly-meant advice from people who've been where I am and done what I'm doing."

And also maybe STFU until she knows whereof she speaks, but that's just my opinion.

She sounds depressed and overwhelmed and like she could do with a thyroid test, honestly. Being so exhausted all the time that you can't face a doctor's appointment is beyond just normal flagging energy levels.

[OnceModestTwiceShy]

Anna T is the one who took breaks to cry while cleaning out her fridge for Pesach? Yeah, she's VERY sensitive, to say the least. I would be very surprised if she wasn't unknowingly struggling with chronic fatigue, fibromyalgia, depression, or some combination of these. In fact, I wonder if that's why the docs keep insisting on procedures and tests that she feels are unnecessary - they might suspect that something is up and are trying to pinpoint it to help her. Of course, in this case they are probably rightly recommending that she rethink the continuous childbearing, and that won't sit well with her.

[VodouDoll]

She makes me feel so impatient. I can't understand how anyone could be so tired all the time. She couldn't handle working two days a week? That exhausted her totally beyond endurance? What was she doing for those two days that made her so tired? Was she an ER nurse? A commercial fisherman? A construction worker? What on earth was this woman doing for two days a week that completely socked her out for the other five? And why doesn't she realize that the rest of the world works full time just fine, so maybe the problem is with her rather than with the fact that jobs exist? And it's never occurred to her that her fatigue is not normal. She seems to think everyone else is like her! We don't all need naps just to survive the day. We don't all collapse after two days of work.

I feel for her not wanting to get pregnant again so soon. If only there were a little pill she could take every morning with her orange juice that could keep her worst fear from coming true....

[Witsec6]

OK, I understand fear, but she just likes to wallow, doesn't she? It's like she can't see ANY positives (even the fact that she is likely not pregnant after all)...

[Shirley MacLaine]

health care that will pressure me into having expensive, invasive, time-consuming procedures and check-ups – far away from my home, far more than is necessary, which will drain my limited energy

I really do not understand how a trip to the doctor, even a doctor an hour's journey away, can ~drain~ the energy of a healthy young person. I don't think she should have to keep all the suggested appointments and blah blah, but it is not normal to be as easily fatigued as Anna T. She is so fucking retiring. She's like a walking nap.

[aggythenostic]

Oh please Anna T. Boo the fuck hoo. People are so mean to her! They don't understand! It's soooooooooo haaaaaaaaaaaaaard being a Little Princess! Hey, have your babies however you want, but whining about how they make her FILL OUT FORMS [gasp] and so now she's scared to be pregnant again is completely ridiculous. As they say in Yiddish, she's nothing but a little pishe, wet behind the ears, telling everyone else that they need to stay home blah de blah blah.

Expensive, time consuming check ups - does she not get that this is for her own good? And if she doesn't want them, how can she be pressured?

Loving her rant on Jane Austen, who, according to Historian and Professor Anna T "led a happy, quiet life with time to write." Uh, no hon. She was dragged around by her family because she had the equivalent of 20 cents to her name at a time and very little independence when if you didn't get married you might just starve. Why do these fundies NOT see that Austen was a feminist in her time? Ugh. So blind.

[pimpom]

The second I read her latest post I raced over to FJ to see if any of you were as irritated as I was. She really is the world's whiniest whingiest cry-baby victim imaginable. I am sure the strong Jewish Women of history would give her a hug and then a big kick in the backside!!!

And indeed, get a heter doll! If you're Jewis, why not profit from the system? Maybe she's addicted to being all woe-is-me? A bit of a martyr complex?

GRRRRRRR

[Ridiculous]

A third issue is something to do with husband not touching their wives during births or something...? She mentioned something to that affect once. Not sure what it means. Maybe someone Jewish can elaborate. However, this is a minor issue. I believe the first two are the major reasons she is readying herself for another hospital stay.

It's to do with Niddah (Jewish family purity laws). While giving birth, and for a time following birth, the man can not touch his wife. Same deal as when she's on her period, just for a longer time.