Question for mothers or fathers...Lias kids behavior.

[tabitha2]

Real talk,Kim is my fundie obsession but after reading this I have to ask are her kids merely creative or just not particularly bright? Is this normal behavior or do they seem very unruly? seriously.I don't have kids but this seems slightly abnormal.

http://inashoe.com/2009/08/rules-thought-loud/

first, a few basics:

If you learned it from Calvin and Hobbes, it's probably not allowed.

Emulate The Three Stooges and Little Rascals with great caution.

Don't be stupid on purpose.

And some specifics:

Do not play in the dryer. Do not turn on the dryer while somebody else plays inside.

Don't hold a 5 lb. bag of elbow macaroni upside down and shake it to test the zipper seal.

If you must play Catholics-and-Protestants-at-the-Inquisition, please do it quietly. For the neighbors' sake.

Don't drink up the leftover communion wine at church.

Rough-housing does not mean it's ok to push your friend down the basement stairs and lock the door. Even if you're already remorseful, you will be punished.

Don't color on puppies. Especially not Golden Retriever pups. Especially not with a black permanent marker.

Don't pour water inside plaster walls on the second floor. I don't care if you think there's a rat in there.

Don't hold down little boys and punch them, even if somebody just finished explaining that little boys like to play rough.

If you find old gum stuck to the bottom of a chair, it will not be funny when you stick in your dad's hair.

I know it's cool that the tree branch makes snapping noises when you stand on it, but that doesn't mean you should jump up and down.

Don't try to cut holes in the floor with a butcher knife. I don't care how realistic your dream was. You will not find a secret tunnel leading to your grandma's house in Tennessee.

Don't cut holes in your sister's underwear and put them on the dog. Even if I laughed when you did it, don't do it again.

Do not rifle through your uncle's pockets while he is sleeping.

Do not dig 4 ft. deep pits in a city yard and threaten to bury your little sister.

Do not hide on the roof. I don't care if you're playing hide-and-seek and can't find a better place.

Sliding down the stairs in a sleeping bag might be fun, but I don't approve.

Don't have mud fights with the neighbor boy. I don't care who started it unless it was you. Then you're in even more trouble.

If you eat bugs in any form - including fried walking stick bugs with cheese - don't tell me about it. Again. Yes, it's very cool that the rocks were hot enough to cook them outside, but I still don't want to know.

Just believe the TV for once when they tell you not to lick a frozen telephone pole. Extend this to include the side of the ice cream maker, the ice tray, and the inside of the freezer door.

Don't play in the laundry chute, even if you saw your uncle doing it first. Nor should the cat be encouraged to do so.

Ask before you decide to walk to the library. Especially if you're 4yo.

[ladypuglover]

Real talk,Kim is my fundie obsession but after reading this I have to ask are her kids merely creative or just not particularly bright? Is this normal behavior or do they seem very unruly? seriously.I don't have kids but this seems slightly abnormal.

http://inashoe.com/2009/08/rules-thought-loud/

The bolding is mine of what my own sons have done in some form or another. And that is just what I will admit to. My oldest 3 sons took a bag of cheetos, the cat and stuffed them both into a sofa cushion while I was upstairs getting dressed. We had to duct tape the sofa after and we never did get the orange color out of it. My second son in less than 5 minutes at the age of 3 cut his and older brother's hair down to the scalp, cut the clothes of the newborn, cut a hole in the carpet, cut 7 throw pillows, all 8 dinning room chair, my heirloom rocker, 3 floor pillowsand a quater size circle off the cat's butt.

Kids can be ingenious and as dumb as a box of broken door knobs all at the same time. In my family we don't praise them for being bad but we know it is a hereditary thing from my grandfather. My grandfather used to think it was funny to let the horses out in the middle of the night to watch his mother and grandmother try to catch them in their nightgowns and sleeping caps in the early 1900's. With the stories of my grandfather Tom Sawyer has nothing on his mischief and all his desendents are just as bad as children as he was. But this is a man who graduated from the 8th grade and went on to teach at the Colorado School of Mines. Ill behavied doesn't mean stupid all the time. ;)

[Wolfie]

Normal behavior. Kids are amazingly creative, but don't have some of the "this is not a good idea" instincts that we usually develop as adults.

We were allowed to slide down the stairs in sleeping bags, and my dad and uncles used to push us into the basement and lock the door...

(I say usually, as some adults don't develop it and we end up with people throwing themselves over a railing to catch a fly ball or climbing over a barrier to get a photo of themselves at Yosemite)

[Brainsample]

She's being a bit tongue in cheek, isn't she?

Some of it's just silly to be silly, don't you think?

[tabitha2]

I see.I was an only child and to withdrawn for various reasons to have friends to act the fool with so I can't see doing all this.the only goofy things i remember doing is opening every single under the tree 3 days before Christmas and jumping out and scaring an acolyte at my church resulting in him getting orange soda on his pristine white robes 10 minutes before mass.The throwing rocks at wasps nest was not that bright either...But Kims kids really don't have a lot of supervision so yeah it probably all happened.

[Burris]

I did some of that: Crazy-carpet down the stairs, digging through old walls hoping to find period newspapers, jumping from a high window onto a trampoline, rolling down a hill in a steel barrel...

My brother thought the dog needed a bath and so he dumped a container of Comet on her. (She was fine. In fact, she lived to be 21. She damned near ended up outliving my brother, who could have easily died when he crept up to the fire-pit to find out why the aerosol can of bug-spray hadn't exploded yet.)

Those were the days.

[Kelya]

I agree its meant to be a bit humorous, but if that's all based off of true events I'm thinking Kim needs to do more "exercising" by walking around and actually observing her children. I got into a few scrapes when younger and went on a few marker rampages, but I question their supervision if this is just the stuff she'll confess to. I was never left alone long enough to deduce about a rat, find a bucket, fill the bucket, drag the bucket to the wall, climb up the wall, and pour. That sounds like more than five minutes of activity to me and that's all I was left alone for until I knew better than to pour water into walls (around age...8 or 9, I wasn't particularly precocious in the common sense arena).

[Shoobydoo]

I am only 20 and don't have kids of my own, but I can totally see myself shaking a bag of pasta upside down as a child. Hell, I'd probably do it as an adult because high IQ =/= common sense. Kids don't really have the "if I do X then it will be bad" sense that adults are supposed to have. I think it's something thats acquired through experience and learning as we age.

[Fun-Dee]

The bolding is mine of what my own sons have done in some form or another. And that is just what I will admit to. My oldest 3 sons took a bag of cheetos, the cat and stuffed them both into a sofa cushion while I was upstairs getting dressed. We had to duct tape the sofa after and we never did get the orange color out of it. My second son in less than 5 minutes at the age of 3 cut his and older brother's hair down to the scalp, cut the clothes of the newborn, cut a hole in the carpet, cut 7 throw pillows, all 8 dinning room chair, my heirloom rocker, 3 floor pillowsand a quater size circle off the cat's butt.

This is the best laugh I've had in a while. When my daughter was three, she decided she didn't want bangs anymore, so she cut hers off right in the middle. Together my two kids poured milk into a VCR tape. I never did get the reasoning behind that one. Then there was the time I turned on the oven, not knowing there were crayons in there. My youngest is now 21. I can laugh about it now.

[ladypuglover]

This is the best laugh I've had in a while. When my daughter was three, she decided she didn't want bangs anymore, so she cut hers off right in the middle. Together my two kids poured milk into a VCR tape. I never did get the reasoning behind that one. Then there was the time I turned on the oven, not knowing there were crayons in there. My youngest is now 21. I can laugh about it now.

My oldest is 21 and the baby is 9, so give me 9 more years to start laughing. 5 sons are killer on my humor sometimes.

[maybeizfundie]

Sounds normal to me. And I think she's probably using some humor there, as well. Also, given the phrasing "do not try" used a couple of times, these are probably things she caught and prevented.

My kids are loud and run around a lot, but fairly mild in terms of crazy things they do. (3 boys and no visits to the ER yet, apparently that's unusual)

However, that list looks a lot like the tales both my parents tell from their childhood.

There is one story in particular from my dad--his younger sister got into her mom's makeup, and put it all over their toddler brother. Then dressed him up in some of mom's clothes. *Then*, they were playing by an open window, he annoyed her, she shoved him, and down he went. Broke some bones. And their poor grandma had to take the little boy dressed in drag to the hospital and explain what happened. And yes there was much playing in the laundry chute in that house. And my grandmother yelled "What's going on down there????" so often that the parakeet learned to say it. :D

My mother used to get into the dog biscuits as a toddler. And when my grandmother finally caught her and forbid her from eating anymore, toddler-mom said "Damn!"

ETA: Neither of my parents grew up in fundamentalist households. Dad's family were "church at Christmas and Easter" folks, and didn't care about religion otherwise. Mom's family was just totally areligious. They were also from two very different social classes. Both families had 4 kids. Dad's family was functional, mom's was very much not.

Although, I have to say, if we'd ever had a dog, my youngest probably would have colored on him. He's colored on the carpet, on the table, on the chairs, on the front door (in ball-point pen, gah), and on the walls, of course. He's a sneaky little goober about it, too.

[amie]

..........

[Want More Babies]

Hiding in the dryer was one of my favorite places. Then again, I was an only child and would do this when friends were over.

I also spent a lot of time on the roof. We had a two story house, but the front porch roof was a favorite of mine.

The stairs, oh my. Wooden stairs were the best. You could fly down those. Our stairs now have carpet so it will make it harder for mine to slide down them unless they use a cookie sheet. :D Yep, I was the one who thought of that. :lol:

Trying to get the toddler boy from drinking out of the dog's water bowl is my new task. He can have his sippy cup in hand and will still get down and lap water from the bowl. I try to wash it every day now. ;)

I can only imagine how much he could get into if he had a brother/sister closer in age to him.

[debrand]

A lot depends on the child's individual personality. Some kids are really calm and don't get into trouble. Other kids are just naturally mischievous and find their own trouble.

I have a million stories about my oldest son. Turning my back on him for an instance was an invitation for him to get into something that he shouldn't.

Once I caught my two boys jumping from their dresser onto their top bunk. There was a rather wide space between the two pieces of furniture. Luckily, they had not broken any bones before I caught them.

My husband still wears the jacket that my daughter used scissors on. There is a little slash in the front of the jacket. My oldest son cut little pieces out of his shirt to see what it would look like.

Arm pit music is not an art form. That is all I have to say on that

[masagoroll]

I agree its meant to be a bit humorous, but if that's all based off of true events I'm thinking Kim needs to do more "exercising" by walking around and actually observing her children. I got into a few scrapes when younger and went on a few marker rampages, but I question their supervision if this is just the stuff she'll confess to. I was never left alone long enough to deduce about a rat, find a bucket, fill the bucket, drag the bucket to the wall, climb up the wall, and pour. That sounds like more than five minutes of activity to me and that's all I was left alone for until I knew better than to pour water into walls (around age...8 or 9, I wasn't particularly precocious in the common sense arena).

Yeah, exactly!

I was going to post "Normal, but it sounds like they need more supervision!"

[Not That Kind of Dr]

I thought Kim's list was entertaining. In fact, I've always liked her blog despite her basic Dominionist insanity because she strikes me as smart and funny. It is a shame that we'd never get along in real life because, again, basic Dominionist insanity and all, but I easily can see myself telling my son, "Don't be stupid on purpose!" Along those lines, as a toddler, I rubbed vaseline through my hair because I saw a commercial on television for a Vidal Sassoon hot-oil treatment and somehow thought vaseline=hot oil=good idea. I proudly and without guile announced to my mother, "I put vaseline in my hair!" It turns out that you can't wash vaseline out of hair. You can only melt it out.

[Deleted05]

Between the four of us, it all sounds like something one of my brothers, or my sister, or I would have done at one point or another. Or very carefully contemplated. We were all incredibly rambunctious and energetic and curious, and just a little obnoxious.

[Rosa]

We did all sorts of stuff like that, and my little boy too, and we've got him outnumbered so it's not lack of supervision! We didn't succeed at all of them, but my mom had a habit of getting the camera out before she stopped whatever was going on, so I *did* lower my little baby brother down the outside of the stairs in the split level, in a decorative wicker basket tied to a rope made out of sheets (i guess I'd been reading a story where a kid did that?) I know because she got a photo.

This summer I caught the 5 year old putting on his spiderman pajamas and going outside to see if he could glide across the yard if he found a high enough place to jump. And, I could not convince him it wouldn't work, so his dad ended up spotting for him so he could try it and believe us instead of biding his time and doing it the first time my back was turned.

Also, I have had adult roomates who made the "shake the bag upside down to see if it's sealed" mistake. I think it comes of never having made that mistake as a little kid.

[Koala]

I thought some of the things on her list were funny.

Honestly my kids have never tried anything like it though. Not sure why, they just never have. Neither did I when I was a kid...I was very cautious.

[brashchick]

How about, "Do not throw a lit firecracker on your friend while he is sleeping on the couch in the living room?". Quote from the friend (who was fine): "It's all very good until someone gets their gonads blown off " OK, now back to studying in the basement of school.

[Avalondaughter]

None of this seems much worse than what you see on the Sh*t My Kids Ruined website. I laughed my head off.

[SpicyCat]

I read that list and laughed because it is so TYPICAL kid. Has nothing to do with how she's raising them, and since there ARE 10 of them, her list is probably longer than mine. Some of mine, for comparison are:

No you will not cover your todler brother's head again with Desitin.

No you will NOT push your brother out the window.

It is not OK to climb on top of the fridge when you're 10 months old.

Cat litter is not a sandbox, please PUT THAT DOWN.

The dryer is not a playground (yeah, mine too)

No, that fall you took off your skateboard/bike/trampoline/whatever wasn't COOL, you scared the pants off of me!!!

The ROOF is not your "thinking" spot!

Also, please don't lock your sister out on the roof.

Wake mom up BEFORE attempting to make a sandwich. (toddler, condiments and raw egg EVERYWHERE)

Walls, doors, furniture, your siblings are NOT for coloring on.

DON'T CUT YOUR OWN HAIR DAMMIT. At 13 you should know better!

Fire is NOT a TOY.

Do NOT shoot your siblings with the airsoft gun in the house.

It could go on a while. Anyrate, no, her list was just pretty funny. Actually think her kids may be better off than a lot in families we snark on, these ones actually seem to get to have fun and aren't beaten into submission.

[bananacat]

I would have never done any of those things as a kid, especially messing with an animal. I was taught to respect living things from a very young age and I would have never teased a dog or cat. I don't have kids yet but I have baby-sat dozens of them and none of them have acted anywhere near as bad as those things on the list. I would have never gone through a sleeping person's pockets because that is stealing. My brothers never would have, and none of my childhood friends would have either. And I knew better to play in the freaking dryer. Honestly, who doesn't tell their kids not to do that?

I really don't think I was some super-good freak. A lot of that behavior is just normal kid things, but at least a third of it is just unacceptable, either because it puts the kids at too much risk or it violates someone else. If I were in charge of a kid and they hit another kid, they would have the longest time-out ever, followed by a long lecture about respecting other people.

[snarkykitty]

Because my mother placed the fear of the back hand in us and due to the very small apartment (and tiny yard) that we lived in until I was 11, there wasn't much trouble to get into. However, my nieces and nephews have had their share of "moments".

I have to say that kids can get into trouble in an instant. It's not necessarily how much they are watched. My sisters are hawks with their kids, and things still happened.

- sticking a bead up the nose (twice!) and having to go the ER

- three kids jumping from the chest of drawers (which was bolted into the wall) onto the bed and literally pulling it down over them (thankfully, they landed in the space between the bed and the tilted chest of drawers and no one was hurt except my and my sister's practical heart attacks when we heard the noise)

- coloring the flat screen television with crayons (the tv had that matte finish)

- coloring the walls in Sharpies (the kids found them in my sister's work bag and didn't know it wasn't one of their usual washable magic markers)

- hanging from the upper landing of the stairway and dangling over the empty hallway (a kid we've nicknamed "Stretch" because of his long limbs and his crazy flexibility)

- climbing the top of the playscape (over the monkey bars) and seeing who can jump the furthest

- a 2-year old chugging the remaining white wine (about 2 ounces) that his mother just put down three seconds before because thought it was Sprite (the only "soda" they were allowed to drink)

I'm sure that there are more, but I don't want anyone to get any ideas, lol.

[luckylibrarian]

Some of those things (i.e. coloring the dog, hiding in the dryer, going through someone's pockets) are unacceptable because they are disrespectful or unsafe. My son isn't a risk-taker at all and won't do anything that could be potentially uncomfortable or hazardous. I kind of wish he had done a few of the things on that list. The closest he has come is drawing roads and buildings all over the carpet with Sharpies, and he also put Silly Putty in my hair.

Coloring the puppies is a little disturbing. Poor dogs. :(