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Dad-Moms, Man-Fails, and Women At Home For the Glory of God


mystweaver

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This blog post was linked from Tim Challies' blog--Challies is a big-wig in the reformed movement, and this blog author is one of the CBMW/9Marks cronies. He had to take on the horrid theology in the Tide dad-mom commercial. :roll: The fact that he titled it the "man-fail" should have warned me (and that he linked to Driscoll's rant on girly Australian men in approval).

The curse bore down upon Eve’s primary activity, childbearing, showing that her intended sphere of labor and dominion-taking was the home (Genesis 3:16). This is true of the virtuous woman of Proverbs 31 as well, who though something of a whirling dervish of godly femininity was not, like her husband, by the city gates with the elders (Proverbs 31:23), but working tirelessly to bless her family and manage her home for God’s glory....This is not to say that men do not help out around the house in some ways. I sometimes help with the dishes, and I certainly do not read the paper for several hours with my feet up while my wife wears herself out. Compared to many generations, I’m much more plugged in with my kids, and I do help out around the house in certain ways. My wife, however, is the homemaker, not me (and a fantastic one at that). She does the vast majority of the cooking, cleaning, and managing of the house; she spends the day with the kids while I provide for my family.

owenstrachan.com/2011/11/02/the-dad-mom-and-the-man-fail/

In the comments, it gets worse. From the author,

I’ve actually folded a “frilly dress†before–and survived! But I’m not a “Dad Mom,†and neither are you.

Really? Survived? Remember to take the girl-cooties antibodies before you stepped into your wife's domain?

In case you weren't convinced he's a pompous oaf, he got a chance to respond to a response on Christianity Today's blog, and closed with,

I appreciate the dialogue, Laura. Now, if you will excuse me, I must be off. I have a full day ahead: from 9-5 I need to provide, from 5-8:30 I must plug in with my wife as a Christ-shaped, self-sacrificial leader, and then I must rest in order to, if I may steal the words of Tide, be awesome, if only in the most gospel-driven sense.

blog.christianitytoday.com/women/2011/11/the_bible_gender_and_dadmom_de.html

I don't even have kids, and my day is fuller than his. Still, being a Christ-shaped, self-sacrificial leader while working 9-5, 5 days a week sounds like a lot of work, and is obviously much more draining than managing the home all day, every day.

This enlightened individual would also like to warn us that contact-sports are destroying the femininity of girls:

Thanks to Title IX and other factors, women today regularly engage in contact sports–basketball, soccer, football, wrestling, and more. These endeavors encourage women to be less feminine and more masculine, a mindset that is bleeding over into the broader culture....Femininity is a gentle, fragile thing. It is a precious thing. It must be guarded and preserved. It is inherent to a woman. You can’t put a girl into all of the same activities as a boy and expect that she’ll still possess her full femininity. If you do so, you will compromise aspects of her God-given womanhood.

Women do not need to weak or willowy. But neither should they be vicious and manly. We are teaching our daughters the wrong lessons today. One that we must consider is sports and general decorum. For the glory of God, girls should look and act differently than boys. For the glory of God, parents should teach girls to treasure and preserve their womanhood.

It's like Dougie, but mainstream. Did someone in the 1800's invent a time-travel machine and bring their theology with them?

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Ok, if we want to buy his argument for just a sec...how does "births the babies" = "washes the dishes"???? Delivering/raising children and housework are NOT the same thing.

Urgh.

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I can't roll my eyes back into my head far enough. I wonder what this guy would think of my husband who works (I stay home) and provides for us financially and STILL does all our laundry and knows how to braid my daughter's hair? I don't think he's failing as a man at all. I think he's succeeding at being a full partner in our marriage and a kick ass dad to his daughters......and boy do they need one! I can't braid hair for shit! LOL

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Quote:

Thanks to Title IX and other factors, women today regularly engage in contact sports–basketball, soccer, football, wrestling, and more. These endeavors encourage women to be less feminine and more masculine, a mindset that is bleeding over into the broader culture....Femininity is a gentle, fragile thing. It is a precious thing. It must be guarded and preserved. It is inherent to a woman. You can’t put a girl into all of the same activities as a boy and expect that she’ll still possess her full femininity. If you do so, you will compromise aspects of her God-given womanhood.

.

Why, it's like he totally gets me. What is a delicate, fragile, hot house tulip such as myself, doing working outside the home? It must have been all of the football and wrestling I did during my fascinating girlhood. MY GOD GIVEN WOMANHOOD HAS BEEN RUINT! (in actuality, I was a ballet dancer, but that involves immodest dress and touching boys I was not related to!)

Don't get me started on my Dad-Mom. I mean, somehow, even though he is also a delicate girlie-man. He works at home, and takes care of our daughter, what a horribly unmanly man I God selected to be my headship. I must remind him he should be out having hot, sweaty, anaconda romps, and reading the Bible, rather than being the day care giver of our rambunctious child. I really should be home suppressing her nature like a good help-meet! Who works 9-5 anymore? He must be a low level hourly employee, because my husband? Works about 55 hours a week on average. Me too. And we still have time for each other, our daughter, and others.

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I’ve actually folded a “frilly dress†before–and survived!

Horrors unmatched by any landmine tragedy.

They should do an episode of I Survived... with this guy.

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So Tide detergent is leading the cultural decline of men. Wow, who'd have thunk it? :lol:

Interesting that many of his commenters disagree with him...I guess, he took it a little too far even for his own fans. Even in the face of the dissenting comments, he maintains that "only God's plan is wise". God only knows what will happen if the whole country were to fall into a male laundry-folding frenzy. Maybe he would smite us by cursing us to roam the land naked once again!

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Did someone in the 1800's invent a time-travel machine and bring their theology with them?

My male ancestors would disagree with that statement as they all encouraged their daughters to be more than SAHDs or SAHMs. They sent their daughters to college and had them work before marrying. Also some were able to travel before settling down but in the same breath my male relitives did hope all their daughters would someday marry their(daughter's) choice of a husband. My greats and great-greats were not normal american victorians to be sure. One could say my ancestors were feminists as they all supported women's rights. Gasp! :o ;)

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Did anyone see the article this week about the FIRST MAN TO WIN THE MARY KAY PINK CADILLAC??!! He said he started selling Mary Kay because it was the only way he could see to have time to take care of his parents (who would otherwise have had to go to a nursing home) and make a living.

http://www.cbs19.tv/story/16091334/web-exclusive-first-man-to-receive-pink-mary-kay-cadillac

:D :dance: :clap:

Yeah, you go, girly-man! I'd rather have you on my side than one of the ugly misogynists any day.

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Okay. He works 9-5 but if his wife is a housewife, she works all day, every day. No time off. How is that fair or a good trade off? If I was her, I'd refuse to do any work after a certain time each day or I wouldn't work on weekends or holidays.

Because my husband is military, I know many guys who managed to go to war and still help around the house. Somehow their manliness wasn't ruined. I've also known many female soldiers who served in Afghanistan and Iraq. Their nontraditional roles didn't emasculate their husbands.

I find conservative men's discomfort with their own masculinity both amusing and repulsive

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I guess he is quite hip within Christianity.

I read his article on why he does not home school when I was linked once.

What I took away was that Mr. Challies wants his children in public school to use the education system as place for his children to practice evangelism.

He wants his children to mingle with the heathens so his kids will understand that they are superior based on their religion.

He wishes to use his children as ways to add more notches to his spiritual headboard by befriending the heathens parents.

He sends his children to school as to not lose credibility in their social circles.

He apparently believes that Christians do not commit infidelity.

He seems to think that there are no Christian mothers who work outside the home and if one does work outside their home, their children are neglected.

"They will learn the value of mom following her biblical convictions and staying home to be a homemaker when they see families where mom and dad do not arrive home until well after dark leaving the children with no oversight, no guidance."

http://www.challies.com/articles/why-i- ... ool-part-2

Eh. I do not see the appeal of this man. He seems to be from Driscolls school of dumbass.

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"I must plug in with my wife"????

He really wrote that?

What a stupid, stupid, stupid post to begin with -- but that part just takes the cake. So to speak. :lol:

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For the glory of God, girls should look and act differently than boys. For the glory of God, parents should teach girls to treasure and preserve their womanhood.

This is why I call these groups the cult of gender. Their whole, entire theology rests solely on gender. Nothing else. They try to put a thin veneer of "Bible" on it, but it falls apart easily with even the smallest amount of reading comprehension and logic.

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"I must plug in with my wife"????

He really wrote that?

What a stupid, stupid, stupid post to begin with -- but that part just takes the cake. So to speak. :lol:

:icon-lol: For three and a half hours, no less.

[insert 4 hour joke here] :shifty:

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This is why I call these groups the cult of gender. Their whole, entire theology rests solely on gender. Nothing else. They try to put a thin veneer of "Bible" on it, but it falls apart easily with even the smallest amount of reading comprehension and logic.

Also, if women and men just "are the way they are" by design or whatever why do they have to make so many rules about who can do what? You would think if our gender roles were so ingrained by God that maybe we wouldn't be able to accidentally mess them up by playing football. :lol:

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Reading all these things makes me think that to live up to the overblown image of constricted and constructed femininity certain fundies seem to expect of me, Id have to become some sort of female impersonator. And not even one of the bitchy ones.....

I have no problems with female impersonators btw

I just dont see the problem with being me

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Also, if women and men just "are the way they are" by design or whatever why do they have to make so many rules about who can do what? You would think if our gender roles were so ingrained by God that maybe we wouldn't be able to accidentally mess them up by playing football. :lol:

Exactly this. If gender roles are so "natural" why do fundie parents have to continually, rigorously reinforce and police them, and why is this guy having to tell a bunch of full-grown men not to do "womanly" things?

If women are designed for the home, how come so many of us (given half a chance) leap at the opportunity to work outside the home, partake in further education, travel the world, etc? Are we all just designed wrong?

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Okay, so:

My husband and I have little girls, early primary age, and a toddler son. Shortly before Halloween, the toddler son suffered a freak injury that required a medevac to another state because there was a possibility of the kind of life-threatening situation developing that requires the best trauma team you can find. (He is okay!) I went with our son and my husband stayed home with the girls.

Was I supposed to stay home "for the glory of God" even though my son was still nursing for comfort and was almost certain to regress to more clingy, babylike behavior because he was hurt and in a strange place? Was my husband supposed to take our son because it was the "manly" thing to do? And when his little boy wanted to nurse and shut out the world, what then? Punish him?

While he had sole care of the girls, was my husband supposed to make them do all the dishes and wash all the laundry even though they were too short to reach everything? Was he supposed to just let it pile up? Moan and groan about having to handle assorted cleaners? One of our girls is little enough to have accidents--was he supposed to just let her marinate in the mess until I got back? Come to that, his family couldn't afford a nurse for my late mother-in-law, a widow, when she needed someone to help her do basic things, so he took up the slack as the sibling who was at the time without dependents. Was he supposed to make her spend down her meager assets and dump her on the public expense account because it was unmanly to wash her clothes? Or when I had to medevac with Little Dude, should he have dumped our girls on his sister-in-law, who has raised her three and has commitments in the evening, or his sister, who has multiple health problems, because they don't have penises and he does?

When Little Dude and I got home, my husband told me to go to bed and catch up on my sleep. He continued to look after the children until I could string two coherent sentences together. He did not demand a medal or complain about the horrid penis-shriveling shame of touching dishwater. I suppose that makes him unmanly in the eyes of this jerk. What a load of crap.

ETA: Things I'm thankful for: Not having been raised in a church that takes people like this seriously.

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