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Jill, Derick and Israel- Part 16


samurai_sarah

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Silverspoons wrote:

My mom decided several years after my dad died that she wanted to see the world and date different types of people. She kind of wanted to do all the things she didn't do in her 20's. My mom had been shocked to be widowed at 49 so I was okay with her going out and having a good time. My mom really didn't think of the world of STD's in the senior citizen community. This man she had met online wanted to take her on a short vacation. He was clearly wanting to know if my mom had practiced safe sex and if she had been tested. I think my mom thought birth control was just about reproduction and didn't really think of people in their 50's and 60's getting STD's. My mom lives in a retirement area and it finally hit home when a lady at the catholic church stood up to tell her story of how her husband was dying of AIDS and she was HIV positive in their 70's. Her husband had cheated when she was off helping with her grandkids out of state.

 

 

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Safe sex is a topic that does not get discussed enough.  People who lose partners after many years a marriage may forget STI's exist as they were safe from these during marriage ( assuming the marriage was faithful).  

It is a new world when they start dating again.

young adults did not live through the early AIDS days, where we had ads reminding us that we were not only sleeping with that person, but all of their previous partners as well.

I constantly remind my young adults that condoms are essential.  They went to a Catholic school so safe sex was not discussed at school.  I have found that they are a captive audience when you are driving them somewhere . :my_smile:

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My granny's nursing home has "senior safe sex" pamphlets around the place, and a monthly information night for residents and carers... 

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3 hours ago, InThePrayerCloset said:

My granny's nursing home has "senior safe sex" pamphlets around the place, and a monthly information night for residents and carers... 

"We may get old, but we still get hot." -Maggie Kuhn, elder rights activist

People really need to be more aware of the fact that old people still have sexual urges and needs; I don't like how old people are so often infantilized in society and in health care (though to some extent with dementia/otherwise mentally incapacitated elderly people, I get it).

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I'm kind of in an odd situation because I'm in my early twenties, have a <10% chance of ever becoming pregnant, and a virgin who considers herself demisexual (only sexually attracted to people I feel emotionally attracted to).

Because of my condition, I probably know way more about women's reproductive system than most 21-yearolds.

Though it's not really a concern for me right now, when it comes to safe sex, I personally wouldn't feel the need to use protection if my only risk was falling pregnant. Probably immature of me, but my chance is so low, I'd be happy to have the chance to be a mother, and because I'm demisexual, I'd probably be comfortable with the chance of him being the father. Of course this is all up to him, as well. However, if I knew the guy had previous sexual partners, no way would I not use protection. My mind just goes straight to the math - if he's had 4 sexual partners, and they all had 3 sexual partners then that's like sleeping with 17 different people AND THEN what about the people his sexual partners have slept with???

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At one point I lived near the Villages, Fl, and STIs among seniors living there is a huge issue.  Since almost the entire area is 55+, they never think about protection and there have been several outbreaks of several STIs because people can be very casual with sex down there.

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15 minutes ago, bashfulpixie said:

At one point I lived near the Villages, Fl, and STIs among seniors living there is a huge issue.  Since almost the entire area is 55+, they never think about protection and there have been several outbreaks of several STIs because people can be very casual with sex down there.

The best sex of my life is now at 60. Sex drive has not dimished a bit, Mr. Beach is, ahem, healthy and we are on the same wavelength.We remember when sex would not give you a possibly life threatening illness , maybe a chronic one (herpes) at worse. However , I find that my peers are more concious of HIV and knowing your status and that of your partner. HIV does not respect age. It needs to be talked about more by health care professionals, who may skip over sexual health issues with older patients.

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21 hours ago, SilverBeach said:

The best sex of my life is now at 60. Sex drive has not dimished a bit, Mr. Beach is, ahem, healthy and we are on the same wavelength.

Yeah, at 61, Mr. Four and I do all right... (ALL RIIIIGHT!)

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3 hours ago, Four is Enough said:

Yeah, at 61, Mr. Four and I do all right... (ALL RIIIIGHT!)

Yes Indeed! I hate the misconceptions about  people our age making whoopee. Mr. SB is 63 and we both have lots of good years ahead.

Keep on having fun!

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Hysterectomy, no HRT, on antidepressant, and sex is great. Mr. Daisy and I have a strong sexual attraction.

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1 hour ago, nastyhobbitses said:

This is making my dry spell at 24 look even more pathetic.

:laughing-rolling:

Sorry, but that was FUNNY! Good for you for having a sense of humor about it. This, too, shall pass, nastyhobbitses. ;)

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5 hours ago, nastyhobbitses said:

This is making my dry spell at 24 look even more pathetic.

No, you'll be fine. A fallow period will make it even better when you start up again, which you will.

so will you @InThePrayerCloset.

Now, my dry spell at 61 is scary!

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Supposedly the woman's sexual prime is 35. I'm only one year past it, but my sex life is completely nonexistent. I've had opportunities, but limited interest. It feels as if Jeebus has laid it on my heart to wait for me to have strong sparkly feelings for somebody before I move into getting physical. My best friends have all found their somebodies and are married or heading in that direction, and it gives me a strong sense of abandonment. It's been 3.5 years since I ended something long term. I've attempted to date, but have yet to feel any urge to merge. It's as if my Sparkly Feelings receptors are broken. Sad truth is I barely even self pleasure because usually by the end of the day I'm too tired to even bother....
Sorry for the whining. I realize this probably won't last forever, but I'm drier than the Sahara here. I appreciate the fellow commiseration @Ungodly Grandma, @nasty hobbitses, and @InThePrayerCloset. Let us join hands in a virtual prayer circle that the Goddess Aphrodite will send us action soon.

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A lot of seniors don't practice safe sex because they can't get pregnant. So what's the point. Unfortunately they forgot about STDs

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I just love this page now more than ever. Mazel tov to all you folks getting it on the regular (may I be so lucky at your ages!), my sympathies to those who aren't getting some but wish to. I am suppressing my inner yenta, only because it would be hard to explain to someone I wanted to set you up with that I met you on a fundie internet snark board. 

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Hubby and I feel like slackers now. Constant morning sickness can have that effect I guess. :pb_lol:

To all those experiencing dry spells - it'll end at some point and it shall be glorious.

Peace, love, and Fritos (which is one of the few things that tames my tiny little tyrant right now.)

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1 hour ago, VelociRapture said:

Hubby and I feel like slackers now. Constant morning sickness can have that effect I guess. :pb_lol:

To all those experiencing dry spells - it'll end at some point and it shall be glorious.

Peace, love, and Fritos (which is one of the few things that tames my tiny little tyrant right now.)

@VelociRapture, I hope your morning sickness clears up soon.

Vigorous athletic pole dance has become my substitute for sex, I also love chocolate. I guess the calorie input and output cancel one another out?

Yeah... Nobody holds me at night, but I can honestly say that my lover is 10 feet tall and made of steel. :Bazinga:

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13 hours ago, VeryNikeSeamstress said:

Supposedly the woman's sexual prime is 35. I'm only one year past it, but my sex life is completely nonexistent. I've had opportunities, but limited interest. It feels as if Jeebus has laid it on my heart to wait for me to have strong sparkly feelings for somebody before I move into getting physical. Sorry for the whining. I realize this probably won't last forever, but I'm drier than the Sahara here. I appreciate the fellow commiseration @Ungodly Grandma, @nasty hobbitses, and @InThePrayerCloset. Let us join hands in a virtual prayer circle that the Goddess Aphrodite will send us action soon.

You are not whining. And it is better to not have any interest than to be all worked up over someone who isn't quite right for you. THAT can lead to catastrophe. By the time you and someone are giddy in love, one of your besties will be breaking up. Not wishing it on them, but I've seen it many times.  

11 hours ago, Emme said:

I just love this page now more than ever. Mazel tov to all you folks getting it on the regular (may I be so lucky at your ages!), my sympathies to those who aren't getting some but wish to. I am suppressing my inner yenta, only because it would be hard to explain to someone I wanted to set you up with that I met you on a fundie internet snark board. 

It wouldn't work for me. My father is dead, who would he ask permission to court me?

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1 hour ago, Ungodly Grandma said:

You are not whining. And it is better to not have any interest than to be all worked up over someone who isn't quite right for you. THAT can lead to catastrophe. By the time you and someone are giddy in love, one of your besties will be breaking up. Not wishing it on them, but I've seen it many times.  

It wouldn't work for me. My father is dead, who would he ask permission to court me?

Now, now, I'm sure there's some male relative who is in charge with protecting your virginity and making sure you don't read books or wear pants! (sorry about the loss of your dad Ungodly Grandma)

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15 hours ago, VeryNikeSeamstress said:

Supposedly the woman's sexual prime is 35. I'm only one year past it, but my sex life is completely nonexistent. I've had opportunities, but limited interest. It feels as if Jeebus has laid it on my heart to wait for me to have strong sparkly feelings for somebody before I move into getting physical. My best friends have all found their somebodies and are married or heading in that direction, and it gives me a strong sense of abandonment. It's been 3.5 years since I ended something long term. I've attempted to date, but have yet to feel any urge to merge. It's as if my Sparkly Feelings receptors are broken. Sad truth is I barely even self pleasure because usually by the end of the day I'm too tired to even bother....
Sorry for the whining. I realize this probably won't last forever, but I'm drier than the Sahara here. I appreciate the fellow commiseration @Ungodly Grandma, @nasty hobbitses, and @InThePrayerCloset. Let us join hands in a virtual prayer circle that the Goddess Aphrodite will send us action soon.

Are you me? Anyway, get your booty over to the Single Ladies thread NikeSeamstress so we can commiserate. 

And yeah, the whole, "my friends moved forward and married and I'm the last single one" is a really hard position for several reasons and I don't think our society talks enough about it. 

Things are somewhat better in the rumpy pumpy department now, but I went without sex for five years in my twenties and it damned near killed me.

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41 minutes ago, nausicaa said:

Are you me? Anyway, get your booty over to the Single Ladies thread NikeSeamstress so we can commiserate. 

And yeah, the whole, "my friends moved forward and married and I'm the last single one" is a really hard position for several reasons and I don't think our society talks enough about it. 

Things are somewhat better in the rumpy pumpy department now, but I went without sex for five years in my twenties and it damned near killed me.

Wait, we have one of those?  Where do I find it? Going to search right now.  Thanks for the heads up.

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