Kenneth Nathan Bates

Anyone know how to disguise a webcam?
I have to start looking for a real job now that I'm vaccinated and the end of the pandemic is a possibility, and that will likely mean Zoom. With video. I'm camera-phobic (I'm fine taking pictures, but I cannot have one pointed at me). I just tried looking for webcams on Amazon and basically had a panic attack and breakdown just looking at pictures of those evil things. Actually having one pointed at me, recording and transmitting . . . no. I can't. It's not nervousness. It's not mere camera shyness. It's a true phobia, though there is apparently no official name for it.
I have avoided Zoom and its ilk so far (my family was all into Zoom meetings this time last year, but I started with audio-only, then said no entirely), but it's all the rage and likely will be for a long time, if not forever. So I'll need to suck it up and get a webcam. Maybe if it's covered up like a nannycam I can force myself to use it without having a total breakdown. It also needs to be easy to disconnect and shove in a drawer because I can't have one where I can see it, even shut off, unplugged, and covered.
So . . . any suggestions for webcam disguises? One already non-camera-looking would be best, but an appropriate cover could work. The tricky part is that the lens must be covered as much as possible. Can I use an actual nannycam for this?
Please do not suggest "therapy" for my phobia. That is not an option for many reasons, which I will not get into here.

Happy international weed day to my fellow mary jane loving/enjoying FJ'ers 

I usually only smoke weed on Friday evening and Saturday evening, but I will be making an exception for today. The weather is lovely and I am off work at 15:00, so then I'll be sitting in the sun on my balcony, listening to some good music and  

I know it's almost over but Happy National Cat Lady Day 2021! 
(And I would request all cat people show us your furry ones).

The jury in the Chauvin (George Floyd) trial is sequestered in deliberations as of today. I live in Minneapolis now and the edge in the city is palpable, especially after another police shooting here LAST WEEK. Went to our nearby Target today (the one that was destroyed last summer) and the National Guard is already in the parking lot. If the verdict is not guilty or manslaughter...it's gonna be crazy.

RIP Walter Mondale.  Best presidential candidate never elected.
 

I thought you were never supposed to forget how to ride a bike! My brain remembers, but my body? Not so much. I think I'm going to go to the cemetery to practice - long flat smooth roads with very few people. I'll wave at grandma and grandpa like I used to do when we rode bikes around and around at their house.

The second Covid shot is no joke. 

I thought I found the part I need for my car on O'Reilly Auto Parts' website, but it looks like I can't get it at this time. 
(Please, please, please, please, please click the link! The joke only works if you see it. I promise it really is the auto parts site! )
For those who can't or won't click:
 

A few weeks ago, I was telling @HerNameIsBuffy about the generously sized single carrot I received from Imperfect Foods. Well, today I got two more monsters in my box. I ordered a pound of carrots and a pound of sweet potatoes, and this is what they gave me:

At its widest point, the sweet potato is nine inches in diameter, while the carrot tops out at seven and three-quarter inches. I kinda feel bad about my plans to eat them, as these two are definitely large enough to pursue careers in the adult film industry.

Fuck. Both of my interns are in quarantine. One is positive, the other is a close contact (her exposure was from her roommate, not the other intern). I know six other people who are or were sick within the last month and at least four other people who've had to quarantine after close contact. Things were supposed to be getting better. 😷