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Close Encounters of the Fundie Kind


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I have been assigned the unenviable task of combing through the 400+ pages of Snark, finding and moving threads that are more suitable to Chatter, Worldly Distractions, or the Hobby area. Taking this high-altitude look at FJ, I have spotted a phenomenon that leads to a large number of really short threads, generally with just a handful of replies: the Real Life Fundie Encounter[tm][/tm].

 

In an effort to keep the number of threads more manageable, we're going to experiment with a catch-all thread. If you have a casual encounter with a fundie in real life and would like to talk about it, this is the place.

 

"I saw a van with eleventy kids!"

"There was a lady at the grocery store with a head covering!"

"Some patriarchal asshole told me I defrauded him!"

 

That sort of thing.

 

If you're brave enough to attend a Maxwell seminar, manage to seduce a Vision Forum Intern, or take tea with Lady Lydia, then you are encouraged to start a thread about it. We'll probably have a lot of questions.

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Over Spring Break I took my little cousins up the road to Pigeon Forge a few days. There were fundies EVERYWHERE! We went to Wonderworks, Dollywood, Ripley's Aquarium.

At Wonderworks we saw a couple who was either engaged, courting, or newly married (who can really tell? They both had rings on but they could have been purity rings). They kept about 6 inches apart until they got into the Earthquake Cafe experience and got tossed around. She ended up holding onto his arm, but quickly let go once they got out of the booth.

Edited to add: There was a dinosaur exhibit with plaques talking about them being around Xmillion years ago. I wish I could have overheard discussions amongst the families after they went through that!

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My last encounter was actually really funny.

We were spending the weekend at a Jewish summery camp - specifically, a Labour Zionist one. Once there, we met a family who were introduced to us as "Christian guests from a nearby farm who were interested in visiting a Jewish camp". We had a chance to talk to them - they looked like Duggars, and had decided to give up urban life and jobs. They had an interest in the Holocaust and Jewish things, so when they discovered this camp, they just had to go and show the kids some Real Live Jews!

What results was a visit that I can only describe as friendly mutual bafflement.

The camp director is a friend of ours, and it's safe to say that nothing in his background as a Yemenite/Israeli/Canadian living in a Jewish suburb of Toronto had familiarized him with fundie culture. He agreed to host them, but honestly had no clue what they were all about.

The fundie family was equally bewildered by the camp. Whatever they imagined Jews to be, a bunch of kids and teens at a socialist summer camp doing Israeli folk dancing in shorts clearly wasn't it. I basically got to act as an ad-hoc cultural interpreter that evening.

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There were some men in suits passing out little books on my campus yesterday. I avoided them but saw one of the books lying around school later. It was called "New Testament: Psalms and Proverbs". Yeah. I at least expect the fundies to know which books of the Bible are in which section. Maybe "New Testament" is the name of a church in the area, but it just made me laugh.

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There were some men in suits passing out little books on my campus yesterday. I avoided them but saw one of the books lying around school later. It was called "New Testament: Psalms and Proverbs". Yeah. I at least expect the fundies to know which books of the Bible are in which section. Maybe "New Testament" is the name of a church in the area, but it just made me laugh.

They were probably Gideons or Jehovah's Witnesses. It's written like that because most New Testaments include Psalms and Proverbs as well. The ones I have usually say "New Testament" and below in smaller letters "with Psalms and Proverbs"

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At a large city park last week, on a lovely warm day, where there were dozens of happy little and school-age kids climbing all over the large play equipment and generally having a great time.

Except for the fundie kids. They had waist-length hair, ankle-length denim skirts with sneakers, and were taking a double stroller of babies around and around the paved loop that circles the playground. The family had eight children, and even the chino-clad boys had to walk and observe rather than take part. Ugh.

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There were some men in suits passing out little books on my campus yesterday. I avoided them but saw one of the books lying around school later. It was called "New Testament: Psalms and Proverbs". Yeah. I at least expect the fundies to know which books of the Bible are in which section. Maybe "New Testament" is the name of a church in the area, but it just made me laugh.

No, that is a common form of a shortened bible. Many Christians believe that is most of what you need- the New Testament, proverbs and Psalms. It may likely have been a grammar fail, but that sort of thing is very, very common for evangelicals to give out. They'd rather seekers read the "important" stuff and not have to wade through "old" biblical law that is no longer valid.

See the below link for a pic of what is typical.

http://t1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9 ... EbFRULzOWw

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Ah, that makes sense. I think I've actually seen ones like Sit posted, but didn't connect the two because the cover was designed to look like "Psalms and Proverbs" was a subtitle (and no "with").

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I think that's the most common type that Sit posted. I've never seen one with a colon though. I'd chalk it up to SOTDRT fail.

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I was in Savannah, GA last week for vacation. My partner and I stayed near Forsyth Park, and on our first morning we walked by the playground and I saw three little girls on the slide in long denim skirts with leggings underneath. I made a (pretty loud, I think in retrospect!) comment to partner that they had to be fundies (couldn't see the mom though) because what 3-5 year old girls want to wear a long denim skirt to a playground? And what non-fundie mom would put them into long skirts for the playground?

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I was in Savannah, GA last week for vacation. My partner and I stayed near Forsyth Park, and on our first morning we walked by the playground and I saw three little girls on the slide in long denim skirts with leggings underneath. I made a (pretty loud, I think in retrospect!) comment to partner that they had to be fundies (couldn't see the mom though) because what 3-5 year old girls want to wear a long denim skirt to a playground? And what non-fundie mom would put them into long skirts for the playground?

At least your fundies got to play on the equipment-- mine had to walk on the path around it and look at it longingly. It was sad.

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I live in Southwestern Ontario around many rural Mennonite areas and see Mennonites all the time at the mall and Walmart, etc. I was sitting waiting for my sister to come out of La Senza (one can only look at bras for so long) when two mennonite women with long skirts, long sleeves, head coverings, etc. walked by with their children. Daughters were dressed just like the women, long skirts and head coverings while the boys were wearing gap sweaters and jeans. I see this among the husbands and wives too, women are dressed conservatively and plainly while the men are dressed in a modern way.

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I went to the flea market recently and saw some fundie couples there. Long hair and skirts on the women and the men were wearing suspenders. I later copied a hair bun style from one of the women.

*Hair style was a bun held in place with a Magic Comb/EZ Comb thing.

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I'm getting ready to attend a fundie wedding later this spring. I doubt I'll have any fundie royalty sightings, but there may be some of the near-royalty (landed gentry?). We'll see. At least one of the couple involved is friends with Olivia from the now-defunct Her Noble Character. Should be interesting.

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Here's another blog of someone in my nearest fundie circle: mechanicalmoments.blogspot.com

Mostly boring as all get out, but at least more entertaining than the maxhells. Lately it's been mostly whining and complaining about the government and corporations.

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I live in Southwestern Ontario around many rural Mennonite areas and see Mennonites all the time at the mall and Walmart, etc. I was sitting waiting for my sister to come out of La Senza (one can only look at bras for so long) when two mennonite women with long skirts, long sleeves, head coverings, etc. walked by with their children. Daughters were dressed just like the women, long skirts and head coverings while the boys were wearing gap sweaters and jeans. I see this among the husbands and wives too, women are dressed conservatively and plainly while the men are dressed in a modern way.

I see this too. It makes me mad.

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My suburb (in Texas, y'all) has a large fundamentalist (conservative? Not sure what the best term) Jewish community with several small synagogues in one area. So I see the large families walking on Fridays/Saturdays with head coverings, longer skirts, men in full suits and hats, etc. They always look SO hot in the summer; we are talking 100+ degrees for over a month usually.

Side note: we always see the "Eruv Up" sign on weekends at one of the synagogues and always wondered what that meant. I learned, in simplistic terms, it's like a Jewish force field :lol:

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My friends best friend from school is fundie lite. She wears long skirts, super long hair, dad is a pastor, got married young, has a few kids already, believes in creationism & USES LASERS TO MEASURE THE MOVEMENT BETWEEN ATOMS (or cells I can't remember) for her job/research doctorate thingo.

Mums evangelical/probably fundie lite friend drinks port from a coffee mug so her son won't find out that she drinks. Even though her son was pretty much the naughtiest teenager ever & is still naughty. She thinks he is some kind of saint & believes his obvious lies & feels guilty about the odd drink of alcohol near him.

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My suburb (in Texas, y'all) has a large fundamentalist (conservative? Not sure what the best term) Jewish community with several small synagogues in one area. So I see the large families walking on Fridays/Saturdays with head coverings, longer skirts, men in full suits and hats, etc. They always look SO hot in the summer; we are talking 100+ degrees for over a month usually.

Side note: we always see the "Eruv Up" sign on weekends at one of the synagogues and always wondered what that meant. I learned, in simplistic terms, it's like a Jewish force field :lol:

Are you thinking of Orthodox/Hasidic/Ultra-orthodox jews?

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I had a sighting while shopping with my sister - two teenage girls with long, loose hair, one looking passably normal in her maxi dress over a plain tshirt and flats, the other wearing one of those loose button up tops and a floor length denim skirt with sneakers. They were browsing an accessories store and were soon joined by their mum, also wearing a long denin skirt, a turtleneck top with her hair scraped into a severe bun.

I was so excited that I grabbed my sister and said way too loudly "hey look - quiverfulls!" Naturally she had no idea what she was supposed to be looking at, so I spent the rest of the trip explaining the degrees of Christian fundamentalism. Fun times.

Overall I was very pleased with myself. People that conservative are very rare around here.

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Whatever they imagined Jews to be, a bunch of kids and teens at a socialist summer camp doing Israeli folk dancing in shorts clearly wasn't it. I basically got to act as an ad-hoc cultural interpreter that evening.

OMG, love it. Were they hoping for something a bit more Fiddler on the Roof?

Off topic, but I always think that it must be like that for the kind of conservative American who loves the idea of England (castles, Jane Austin) and then comes over here and meets actual English people. We must be one big fat disappointment :lol: Jane Austin never said nuffink about tattoos, piercing and swearing like a sailor - and that's just the young ladies.

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My last encounter was actually really funny.

We were spending the weekend at a Jewish summery camp - specifically, a Labour Zionist one. Once there, we met a family who were introduced to us as "Christian guests from a nearby farm who were interested in visiting a Jewish camp". We had a chance to talk to them - they looked like Duggars, and had decided to give up urban life and jobs. They had an interest in the Holocaust and Jewish things, so when they discovered this camp, they just had to go and show the kids some Real Live Jews!

What results was a visit that I can only describe as friendly mutual bafflement.

The camp director is a friend of ours, and it's safe to say that nothing in his background as a Yemenite/Israeli/Canadian living in a Jewish suburb of Toronto had familiarized him with fundie culture. He agreed to host them, but honestly had no clue what they were all about.

The fundie family was equally bewildered by the camp. Whatever they imagined Jews to be, a bunch of kids and teens at a socialist summer camp doing Israeli folk dancing in shorts clearly wasn't it. I basically got to act as an ad-hoc cultural interpreter that evening.

These folks would be disappointed if they ever attended a gathering with my extended family and friends: they wouldn't have been able to distinguish the Jews from everybody else.

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We have quite a gaggle of Pentecostals in these parts. I saw a pair of them in Home Depot the other day. She in her maxi tiered brown skirt, with a long sleeve high necked top under a short sleeved scoop neck top and ultra coiffed up do; he in dockers and a button up with shorn scalp. The wife was heavily pregnant but her appearance said this was her first - I've seen well groomed mamas, but the time this lady spent on her look implied childlessness.

They were shopping for cupboard hardware, to her it was the Biggest Decision Ever and she was worried about it. He couldn't have cared less, but seemed condescendingly pleased that she did. She was desperate for his approval on the selection, and he remained stand-offish, self important and vague.

I harboured mean thoughts about them both, not that they were currently doing anything offensive. Just knowing what they were about was enough to rile me. They were the type that every moment of their blessed lives was a lesson for the ungodly, KWIM?

(I was waiting for the customer service guy to come back to see if they had any rural mail boxes in stock, it's the season for replacing the ones the snow plows destroyed over winter)

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