Lose weight because SEX!!!!!111!!!

[Koala]

Truly, just when I think I have read every assbackwards idea imaginable I read this:

A friend of mine told me many years ago that her husband didn't like sex because he had low testosterone. She was overweight. Years later, she lost a ton of weight and got into shape. She told me her husband won't leave her alone now!

Would your husband like you to lose weight? Ask him. We are called in Scripture to obey our husbands in everything! This is not taught today. Women do not want to hear this but if your husband would love for you to lose weight, you need to do it for him.

Go on the Paleo diet. Cut out all the sugar and desserts. Go on long walks everyday. Practice portion control. Stop drinking alcohol. Do whatever you need to do to please your man. Christ died to free you from sin. He tells us we have everything for life and godliness. Start believing Him!

Now that you realize gluttony is indeed a sin, you are filled with the Holy Spirit who gives you self-control, and your husband probably would love for you to be in shape {Some men like some meat on their women. You must ask him how much meat he likes!}, you have no excuse to overeat and be out of shape!

Seriously? Her husband is a bastard. He rejected her because she was overweight, but he won't leave her alone now that she's thin? I'd tell him not to let the door hit him in the ass on the way out.

***Searching in vain for the exploding head smiley, because I truly feel like my head is about to explode with the stupidity of it all***

http://lorialexander.blogspot.com/2013/01/gluttony-and-pleasing-your-man.html#idc-container

Edited to fix the quotes I screwed up

[Lostie]

It would be Lori too.

So does the man have to lose weight for the woman too? Somehow I doubt it. I just - these people are so terrible. :violence-bomb:

[Inanna]

So. If gluttony is a sin, but my hypothetical husband likes his women heavier than I am and I can only get there by overeating, what do I do? Cuz, like, God and my husband are basically BFFs, if not the same person, right?

Seriously, these people need to make me a cheat sheet or something.

[Arete]

I realize I am hardly stating an original idea here but Lori Alexander really is a twat. Oh, and someone needs to clue her in that fat chicks can get laid. Ask me how I know.

[Arete]

So. If gluttony is a sin, but my hypothetical husband likes his women heavier than I am and I can only get there by overeating, what do I do?

I can't speak for anyone else but I would praise the Lord and pass the chocolate cake.

[Bethella]

I can't speak for anyone else but I would praise the Lord and pass the chocolate cake.

[Dysfundamental]

"You must ask him how much meat he likes" is one of the worst things Lori has ever written. Jesus wept.

If your husband wants you to gain 100 pounds, the hell with your health! Just do it because God said so! More lady-meat for your headship!

[Koala]

"You must ask him how much meat he likes" is one of the worst things Lori has ever written. Jesus wept.

If your husband wants you to gain 100 pounds, the hell with your health! Just do it because God said so! More lady-meat for your headship!

I just can't.... How the fuck would a conversation like that go? Is that how these women view themselves? As meat?

Seriously, if I asked my husband "how much meat he liked" he would question my mental stability.

[Inanna]

I can't speak for anyone else but I would praise the Lord and pass the chocolate cake.

I'M IN. Now to go find myself a headship that likes "more meat." (Yeah, ok, I just made myself shudder and gag, even though I put it in quotes.)

[Shirley MacLaine]

So. If gluttony is a sin, but my hypothetical husband likes his women heavier than I am and I can only get there by overeating, what do I do? Cuz, like, God and my husband are basically BFFs, if not the same person, right?

Yeah, you know, I actually have dated a couple of dudes who were generally into women who are heavier than I am. So if I married one... gluttony is totally cool? And I can eat until I feel sick every day? And probably smoke a lot of weed to help me eat even more?

THAT IS AWESOME

*unceremoniously dumps current boyfriend*

[linnea27]

She is such a failure as a human being.

[salsa]

Promise to love in sickness and in health until death parts us, but if a woman gains weight, all bets are off. Nothing in the marriage vows about a husband hanging in there when his wife, after having 10 kids and becomes middle-aged, no longer has the figure of a 20-year-old. Instead, 40-year-old women should restrict their nutrition and find the time to take long walks (I suppose running or going to the gym isn't feminine enough) while homeschooling all those children just so her husband can tolerate the sight of her. Sagging skin in the tummy because stretching it over babies 10 times tends to make it sag - get out your needle and thread and give yourself a tummy tuck. Never mind that your metabolism will slow down - you can live on a 1/2 a grapefruit a day.

why do women hate themselves so? I'd hate to turn myself into an object (or a steak or a slab of tofu) just to be worth breathing the air I breathe.

[Maggie Mae]

The Paleo diet is a fad diet and its not balanced or healthy. Those fad diets can do real damage to ones metabolism, as well. Lori is an idiot. Furthermore, maybe the man with the low testosterone was able to be treated and that coincided with the weight loss. I'm all for keeping healthy, but forcing women to hold them selves to ridiculous, unhealthy standards is pathetic. Lori is not wise or always learning and she should change her name of her blog.

[Koala]

From the peanut gallery:

Great post! I agree with you, though this isn't a popular opinion to have now days (as I'm sure you know). The frustrating thing for me, is that although I work very hard and weigh the same as I did before I had babies, my body looks nothing like it did! That is really hard on me. My husband loves my body though, and that is what I have to go with. He actually gets annoyed when I am down on myself. If he's happy, I should be too!

A reply from one of the sheeple:

Tiffany, men lie to their wives about their wives appearance. Especially men that have been duped by feminism. Get in shape. Throw iron around. Don't settle for him saying, "no" to that question about your jeans and how they make your butt look. He already knows you don't want the truth.

And Lori chimes in:

I think you are right about many men. They are afraid to tell their wives the truth for fear of their wives being upset with them for a long time and using their emotions to make their husbands feel bad. Ken has always been honest about the way he feels about my appearance and I appreciate it because I do want to please him.

:evil: :evil: :evil: (where have all of the smileys gone btw? Tell me Alecto didn't take those with her too)

ETA~ These women hate other women...and themselves.

[gravelmonkey]

From the peanut gallery:

A reply from one of the sheeple:

And Lori chimes in:

:evil: :evil: :evil: (where have all of the smileys gone btw? Tell me Alecto didn't take those with her too)

ETA~ These women hate other women...and themselves.

*bangs head against computer* Lori is full of herself if she thinks she knows better the health of her commenters and the desires of their husbands than the commenters and their husbands do. She just likes being bossy and putting other people down. It makes her feel better about her life.

ETA: I've added "fix smilieys" to the suggestion list.

[Dysfundamental]

Men that have been duped by feminism into treating their wives as people, not meat. Oh, that evil feminism!

[Green Glass]

Yet another example of pinning any problems on the woman. "If your husband doesn't want to have sex with you, it's ALL YOUR FAULT." She's another particularly infuriating one.

[Dollypeeps]

I just can't.... How the fuck would a conversation like that go? Is that how these women view themselves? As meat?

Seriously, if I asked my husband "how much meat he liked" he would question my mental stability.

Mine would think I was offering rump steak for tea pmsl.

Seriously the real reason husband didn't want sex was cos she was over weight and then gets thin and he is ooooh I fancy you crap. He would of got told to do one with a swift kick to the nuts more like.

Lori fuck off you have no clues on women or men for that matter other than your selfish headship.

[desertvixen]

Instead, 40-year-old women should restrict their nutrition and find the time to take long walks (I suppose running or going to the gym isn't feminine enough) while homeschooling all those children just so her husband can tolerate the sight of her.

Obviously why they all need the equivalent of the J-slaves.

I feel bad for the one wife who says while she's not happy with her body, she has a supportive husband who doesn't like her to beat up on herself, and those women are telling her that he is lying. It sounds like jealousy's at the door on that one...

[linnea27]

I think you are right about many men. They are afraid to tell their wives the truth for fear of their wives being upset with them for a long time and using their emotions to make their husbands feel bad. Ken has always been honest about the way he feels about my appearance and I appreciate it because I do want to please him.

more like, Ken is a verbally and emotionally abusive prick and Lori has not only internalized his behaviour, but convinced herself it is godly.

[amydamy]

Men that have been duped by feminism into treating their wives as people, not meat. Oh, that evil feminism!

It's funny because the first commenter is probably has a much better marriage since her husband is concerned about her happiness and her feeling good about herself and not about how submissive she is like Ken.

[VooDooChild]

more like, Ken is a verbally and emotionally abusive prick and Lori has not only internalized his behaviour, but convinced herself it is godly.

What a sad life she leads.

[linnea27]

I am so confused by the contradictory messages in fundieland (I know, I know, a fundie contradicting themselves. You all are shocked). A woman doesn't beautify herself in jewels or braided hair, but instead in good works, or whatever that phrase is. But make sure your husband thinks you are hot. You are not fearfully and wonderfully made if you get fat. Because Jesus totally judged people by their looks and wanted women to look like pin-up models when they are 50 and after spitting out a full quiver of children. Only more modest, because a real woman doesn't show that she looks like a pin-up model. *confused*

[Mice]

The Paleo diet is a fad diet and its not balanced or healthy. Those fad diets can do real damage to ones metabolism, as well. Lori is an idiot. Furthermore, maybe the man with the low testosterone was able to be treated and that coincided with the weight loss. I'm all for keeping healthy, but forcing women to hold them selves to ridiculous, unhealthy standards is pathetic. Lori is not wise or always learning and she should change her name of her blog.

This. So much this.

Lori's blog is one of the ones that irks me the most because she consistently parades faddish internet ideas as sound medical advice. It speaks to the idea that she is more concerned with coming off as an expert than really helping anyone. She doesn't want people to be happy, or good Christians or be more successful in their relationships. She wants to tell you how to live your life and then berate you when you don't do it.

[maybeizfundie]

Yeah, wish it were that easy. :/

Thankful that my husband isn't a jerk about my weight. I don't know about other people but when you love somebody, attraction is more than just their physical state. I was fat when he met me, and I gave him 4 children and I homeschool them and I live where he needs to live for work all of which means time and access to exercise is about nil. So I'm fatter now. That's life. Someday when my children have left home and I'm old and bored, I will have time to exercise. As it is, my primary option is stair running, with four kids watching me and alternating between laughing and saying "Go mama! Go mama!" I'm not going to lose 150 lb and be all hot and sexy. Sorry. Just will not happen. :roll:

And don't get me started about fad diets and the spiritual superiority of following them. :x