Gay couples and children

[latraviata]

[Vex]

Well, we're all child-raping pedophiles - didn't you hear? Everyone knows that children with gay families are routinely molested and become liberal, atheist homosexuals themselves. Duh.

[latraviata]

Well, we're all child-raping pedophiles - didn't you hear? Everyone knows that children with gay families are routinely molested and become liberal, atheist homosexuals themselves. Duh.

Yes, that must be it :D

[Rachel333]

That's great.

Relatedly: has anyone else been getting the ad with the lesbian couple? I think it's for a cryobank. I love it given how many fundies lurk here.

[Effie]

That's great.

Relatedly: has anyone else been getting the ad with the lesbian couple? I think it's for a cryobank. I love it given how many fundies lurk here.

No, I haven't. I would love to see it though...

[lilwriter85]

That's great.

Relatedly: has anyone else been getting the ad with the lesbian couple? I think it's for a cryobank. I love it given how many fundies lurk here.

I haven't gotten that one. I keep gettings ads on here that promote bible colleges and Christian education.

[Jessica]

My sister, who is a drug addict and has been to jail and/or prison several times, who is in a very abusive on-and-off relationship (the 'sperm donor' has another girlfriend as well and apparently when my nephew was over there they got into a fight that turned into screaming and throwing chairs at each other. The neighbor 2 houses down could hear them and called my sister to come pick up her son because she was afraid he'd be killed) can raise a child, but not a loving gay couple because.... oh yeah, teh geyz are worse than convicts... ?!

[QAF_Rocks]

Well, we're all child-raping pedophiles - didn't you hear? Everyone knows that children with gay families are routinely molested and become liberal, atheist homosexuals themselves. Duh.

I've had several people tell me that gay parents shouldn't raise children because those children will grow up to accept homosexuality as perfectly normal. I asked them what was the difference between having gay parents and having straight parents who aren't homophobic, but I didn't get an answer. :roll:

[FJismyheadship]

I know a gay couple who has a daughter. She is about four years old. She is AS CUTE as can be, and seemingly very happy. Everytime I see her with one of her dads, she just looks so happy and content, and they really do love her. I see nothing wrong going on over there.

[mirele]

I'd rather see kids with a loving gay or lesbian couple than with a couple of married heteros who are cooking meth or dealing drugs or beating the everloving daylights out of their kids or...or...or....But, as we discussed at work yesterday, you don't need a license to have kids.

[latraviata]

I'd rather see kids with a loving gay or lesbian couple than with a couple of married heteros who are cooking meth or dealing drugs or beating the everloving daylights out of their kids or...or...or....But, as we discussed at work yesterday, you don't need a license to have kids.

This

[Daenerys]

That's great.

Relatedly: has anyone else been getting the ad with the lesbian couple? I think it's for a cryobank. I love it given how many fundies lurk here.

I keep getting ads for bedwetting products and Asian brides... not sure what that says about my internet history!

[BoomerLynn]

I'd rather see kids with a loving gay or lesbian couple than with a couple of married heteros who are cooking meth or dealing drugs or beating the everloving daylights out of their kids or...or...or....But, as we discussed at work yesterday, you don't need a license to have kids.

+1

[Austin]

I agree with that, and also think that gay parents can be just as good as parents as good hetero parents. So while most intelligent people can agree that kids are better off with two loving, gay parents than bad alternatives, we also need to agree that kids are just as well off with two loving, gay parents as they are with two loving, straight parents.

[Trynn]

I agree with that, and also think that gay parents can be just as good as parents as good hetero parents. So while most intelligent people can agree that kids are better off with two loving, gay parents than bad alternatives, we also need to agree that kids are just as well off with two loving, gay parents as they are with two loving, straight parents.

Agreed.

I also think that it is better for a child to have at least one loving parent rather than to grow up an orphan. Some of my christian friends don't agree with me there because "a kid needs TWO (hetero) parents."

Personally, as long as the child is loved and the parent(s) are able to take care of it, I see no problem.

[emmiedahl]

If a child is loved and well-cared-for, there is no bad family. The measure of a family is how well it nurtures its members.

There are unique challenges to every family model. There are certainly challenges in raising a gay or lesbian-headed family (beginning with the obvious fertility issues), but they can easily be mitigated. The challenges are no more pressing or devastating than those that a mixed-religion family faces.

I think most people are worried that the child of homosexual parents will end up gay. They forget that most gay parents are raising straight children, and all of the gay people I know had heterosexual parents.

[latraviata]

I agree with that, and also think that gay parents can be just as good as parents as good hetero parents. So while most intelligent people can agree that kids are better off with two loving, gay parents than bad alternatives, we also need to agree that kids are just as well off with two loving, gay parents as they are with two loving, straight parents.

Of course!!

Good parents are good parents gay or straight.

[bubbabearzle]

If gay parents are so horrible how did my awesome nephew grow up to be one of the sweetest, kindest (and, believe it or not, straight) guys I've ever met. He's graduating from HS this year and will be going on to college.

Also, if they are so bad, try telling that to my first boyfriend (who came out years after we dated): he and his partner have adopted two adorable kids from foster care who so many straight people passed up. Those kids are thriving because they have loving, caring parents.

OTOH, ther is my sister. Straight as can be, married to a total asshole. She is the mother of three total animals, even her youngest (13 years old) is already getting into big trouble.

My point isn't that gays are better parents, but that each should be judged on their own merits, not by whom they choose to sleep with. ButmI'm preaching to the choir here, LOL!

[bubbabearzle]

If gay parents are so horrible how did my awesome nephew grow up to be one of the sweetest, kindest (and, believe it or not, straight) guys I've ever met. He's graduating from HS this year and will be going on to college.

Also, if they are so bad, try telling that to my first boyfriend (who came out years after we dated): he and his partner have adopted two adorable kids from foster care who so many straight people passed up. Those kids are thriving because they have loving, caring parents.

OTOH, ther is my sister. Straight as can be, married to a total asshole. She is the mother of three total animals, even her youngest (13 years old) is already getting into big trouble.

My point isn't that gays are better parents, but that each should be judged on their own merits, not by whom they choose to sleep with. ButmI'm preaching to the choir here, LOL!

[Kaylee]

I agree with that, and also think that gay parents can be just as good as parents as good hetero parents. So while most intelligent people can agree that kids are better off with two loving, gay parents than bad alternatives, we also need to agree that kids are just as well off with two loving, gay parents as they are with two loving, straight parents.

Agreed. The only real difference I see is prejudice that the kids may encounter, but that is not a reflection of the parents and does not mean it's wrong, just that there are still a lot of assholes around and that hopefully it will decrease as gay families become more common and accepted.

I have two different female friends who are married to women now (one is gay, one is bi) and both of them are great moms and do everything they can to give their children the best life possible, just like most other decent moms do. V. would also put most fundies to shame with her cooking, bento boxes, and cute little crafts and games she comes up with for her kids.

[fundiefan]

If, for whatever reason or under whatever unforeseeable circumstance, a child I knew were to be placed for adoption, I would go to the ends of the earth to work for that child being placed with a loving, adoring gay couple who want a child to raise with love respect over a 'Christian' couple who wears their religion on their sleeve or thinks their beliefs are a selling point.

[QAF_Rocks]

I agree with that, and also think that gay parents can be just as good as parents as good hetero parents. So while most intelligent people can agree that kids are better off with two loving, gay parents than bad alternatives, we also need to agree that kids are just as well off with two loving, gay parents as they are with two loving, straight parents.

Well said. The cry of "at least they're not drug addicts" always strikes me as damning with rather faint praise.

Not that anyone here on FJ has intimated such a thing, but I frequently come across this type of attitude. You get conservatives, sometimes even moderates, who grudgingly concede that same-sex couples can be good parents, and might even cheerfully accept them, but with one caveat. Gay parents are only acceptable as long as they are raising children no one else wanted. It's the "at least they're better off than in an orphanage" type of thinking.

But things change very quickly when same-sex couples decide to have biological children, or, worse, get treated equally in matters of adoption, particularly when they adopt healthy, white newborns. People who object seem to think that heterosexual couples are "owed" those babies and should be given preference in adopting them, while gay couples and single parents should be forced to take the children that are left over.

This is troubling from a variety of perspectives, not least of which is sorting children into "superior" and "inferior" products based on age, race, disability, etc. and classifying parents as "first rate" and "second rate" based on number or gender. I've seen it a lot, though. I hope this type of thinking is getting less common, but it might take another couple of decades to quash it entirely.

[Austin]

Well said. The cry of "at least they're not drug addicts" always strikes me as damning with rather faint praise.

Not that anyone here on FJ has intimated such a thing, but I frequently come across this type of attitude. You get conservatives, sometimes even moderates, who grudgingly concede that same-sex couples can be good parents, and might even cheerfully accept them, but with one caveat. Gay parents are only acceptable as long as they are raising children no one else wanted. It's the "at least they're better off than in an orphanage" type of thinking.

But things change very quickly when same-sex couples decide to have biological children, or, worse, get treated equally in matters of adoption, particularly when they adopt healthy, white newborns. People who object seem to think that heterosexual couples are "owed" those babies and should be given preference in adopting them, while gay couples and single parents should be forced to take the children that are left over.

This is troubling from a variety of perspectives, not least of which is sorting children into "superior" and "inferior" products based on age, race, disability, etc. and classifying parents as "first rate" and "second rate" based on number or gender. I've seen it a lot, though. I hope this type of thinking is getting less common, but it might take another couple of decades to quash it entirely.

You explained this better than I, so thanks. I was trying to address the faint praise/fine-if-no-one-else-wants-the-children issue. And when I said "we", I mean we as a society, not we as the freejinger community. :)

[countressrascal]

Explain to my two grandchildren how bad they are! They were in foster care, mother a meth maker, dealer and user, father unknown. For the last three years they have lived in a loving stable home with two fathers. They have roof over their heads, warm comfortable beds to sleep, clothing on their back shoes on their feet and food in their stomachs every day. The big plus they have finally caught up to their grade level and love school. My son and his partner have changed their life for the kids, they know they are loved and wanted, something that a lot of children do not know.

[countressrascal]

Before I forget, they now live in New York so the kids (8 & 6) are bugging them to get married. It is funny.