Have to Vent - Duggar Comments - Diane

[roddma]

Sometimes I wonder why I even bother on the 19 Kids Facebook page. That Diane Stadhher really got under my skin. She says I have no biz telling those who are TTC they can be fulfilled without kids. The whole thing started about how Anna is happier now and so is Susannah. Diane S. thinks it is because she has a hubby and two kids and Susannah does not. Happiness is different things for people. Here is part of the convo My comments are in blue

 

Maybe the reason Susannah left is she wanted her own life without marrying at an age that ends in -teen. Susannah is engaged to a person of her choosing. Marriage and children doesn't always make someone happier.

22 hours ago · Like

Diane Stadtherr Well, Amanda- we know that children don't fulfill you, as you don't have any. You always sound very bitter about that.

20 hours ago · Like

Amanda Roddy I am not bitter about anything. You assume I am childless by choice but I am not. Even so, I admire those that have the nerve to go against the grain of society and choose another life much like the Duggars(though I don't agree with them). People presume if you aren't married don't have any kids you must be miserable person. Some regret not marrying and so forth but just as many regret marrying and/or having kids. For myself I am happy being married but could have been happy single as well. People can assume Anna is happier because she is married with two kids.Yes it does seem that way about her but I wonder what she will feel the same after four or five. Living single obviously isn't an option for them because they know no other way.

17 hours ago · Like

Diane Stadtherr No Amanda-I'm not assuming anything. I know that you are not childless by choice, as you've stated that in the past. However, because you are unable to have your own children, it seems that you are always telling people that want children, that they don't need them to be fulfilled. You are making a lot of assumptions as well. I wanted to get married and have children. I wanted that since I was about 9 years old. I have been married almost 22 years and have 5 children, and couldn't imagine my life without my husband or kids. You always seem to put the Duggar's down for every choice that they make. I don't agree with everything they do either, but I don't put them down, at every opportunity. Marriage is for some and not for others, and the same with kids. However, you tend to tell people that are trying to have kids, that they don't need to kids to be fulfilled. You have no place to say that to another couple who wants kids, that they don't need them. Because you don't have your own children, you have no idea what it's like to have children, love them and raise them, and I'm sorry that you will never experience that.

 

I also know people who wanted kids, but were unable to have them, so they either adopted, or accepted God's plan for their life, and didn't go around telling people, that they didn't need kids to fill fulfilled. That's what you are doing. Anna seems very happy to me. You seem to look for the negative in just about everything, that's what I see in your comments.

5 hours ago · Like

Amanda Roddy I am not infertile that I know of. It is called childless by circumstance. I never said they don't need them. I say even if you don't you are still a human being and can be fulfilled in other ways. It isn't the end of the world. Believe me people say worse things to the infertile. I am very happy with my life thank you and finally stopped worrying what others thought of my childless status. No one should feel ashamed because of what they lack. That is what I encourage in others.

about an hour ago · Like

[Conuly]

Well, she's halfway right, SOMEbody in that conversation is defensive and bitter. I'm thinking it's not you, though.

[Austin]

Diane is a whackadoodle-doo. Not to mention rather a pathetic figure, just from the limited exposure to her when J'Chelle had her miscarriage.

[Sister Mary Savage]

Why is it that the Duggar defenders always assume that others are jealous, bitter, defensive, or hateful just because they do not fall at the Duggars' feet in praise? I DESIPISE it when they post comments like that.

[Conuly]

Because they're actually jealous, bitter, defensive, and hateful people and feel bad about it?

[Sister Mary Savage]

I dunno. I seriously think that Miss Chrislukas (at the TLC board) has this sick fantasy of living vicariously through the Duggars. Wasn't she the lady that got pregnant out of wedlock, married the baby daddy, and then never could have another kid again?

[Conuly]

I dunno. I seriously think that Miss Chrislukas (at the TLC board) has this sick fantasy of living vicariously through the Duggars. Wasn't she the lady that got pregnant out of wedlock, married the baby daddy, and then never could have another kid again?

See? Jealous and bitter, poor dear! I like to keep my amateur psychology simple and repetitive. If they're not projecting, they're just nuts.

[Sister Mary Savage]

You mean I'm not the only one who thinks she can diagnose?

[Sister Mary Savage]

Never mind. I know who/what you're saying :lol: Shall we start up a psychiatric fund here on F.J. for such head cases?

[emmiedahl]

I am taking a course in Abnormal Psychology. The class starts tomorrow, but I have already read most of the book. This makes me perfectly capable of offering an accurate diagnosis over the internet, right? :dance:

[roddma]

I am taking a course in Abnormal Psychology. The class starts tomorrow, but I have already read most of the book. This makes me perfectly capable of offering an accurate diagnosis over the internet, right? :dance:

I should say so if th Pearls can write a book on child care with zero qualifcations.

[Sister Mary Savage]

Sure, why not? I've already diagnosed chrislukas with the classic condition known as FUCKING CRAZY! However I also think narcissism is a good possibility too.

Oh, and I read that she lurks on here. Hi Chris :snooty: you ought to seek help while you still can. Our nation's psych wards fill up fast I hear.

[So Many Lies]

It is stupid when you say something people don't wanna hear and the recourse is always "youre jealous".

[ladypuglover]

If you're having children only to fullfill you or fill a void then you're having children for all the wrong reasons.

[Sister Mary Savage]

Exactly! Children IMO are not supposed to be instruments for the parents to fill their political agenda, "God's army", or just because a woman feels that her only worth in life is to pop out babies. Michelle Duggar and her cult seem to have them for only these reasons. It's like they are factories that care only about producing a quota and making a dollar. However, instead of doing the manual labor themselves, the older girls do it for them.

[Conuly]

It is stupid when you say something people don't wanna hear and the recourse is always "youre jealous".

Or when they won't stop arguing, so finally you get the evidence to prove they're wrong, and then they go "You don't always have to be right!"

:roll:

No, they don't always have to be wrong. It's not my fault if they are.

(That's only tangential. Sorry!)

[clarinetpower]

*Off-topic request*

Can you please use the quote format and not the blue text? The board style I use highlights in blue, and the blue is dark on my background, so I really just can't read it without some real straining. I find this darker board easier to use, because other things are easier to see on it, so I'd rather not change styles to read a particular post. TIA. :D

[slickcat79]

*Off-topic request*

Can you please use the quote format and not the blue text? The board style I use highlights in blue, and the blue is dark on my background, so I really just can't read it without some real straining. I find this darker board easier to use, because other things are easier to see on it, so I'd rather not change styles to read a particular post. TIA. :D

FWIW, you can also just highlight the blue text with your cursor and it becomes much easier to read. I have the dark background too, and that works for me when reading through shorter posts.

I really don't get Diane. She is freaking everywhere defending the Duggars (and yes, Diane, it's Duggars with no apostrophe). For someone who claims to love her family that much, she sure doesn't spend much time with them.

[dairyfreelife]

Because you don't have your own children, you have no idea what it's like to have children, love them and raise them, and I'm sorry that you will never experience that.

Sorry for two posts, but I suddenly got why this statement irritated me so much-she is apologizing to you because you don't have the same experiences in life as her and thinks that is sad and clearly sees you as unfulfilled. This bugs me to no end. I get so aggravated with people who, when I tell them of my food issues or anxiety or health concerns when asked about why I can't do something or eat something tell me they are sorry. I don't like it when people feel sorry for me or my circumstances. They are what they are and I have learned to deal-it's just the way it is. Most people don't like it when they have a condition or just a situation that is normal to them that people feel bad and are sorry when it's nothing serious or life threatening necessarily.

ETA: My first post is gone-never mind-must have clicked edit when I wanted to quote. :oops: Anyway, I think her response was rude and uncalled for and there is nothing wrong with telling couples that it is okay to not have children and they can still be fulfilled without them. Lots of people want children and many things when they are children themselves, but once adults they realize life is not so easy and change their minds so big deal that she always to marry and have children-don't most people? I used to want lots of children too, now I'm fine with 0-3 and not all biological if I have any bio-maybe just 1. I'll see what happens and what I can handle when the time comes. Just because you want something doesn't mean you will get it either. You should still be content with your life anyway or learn to be if it doesn't happen. Her "we know children don't fulfull you seeing as you have none" comes off as snobby and arrogant. I can't read that without seeing some middle-aged woman sticking up her nose at you. She's being judgmental, not you.

[Antigone]

Ok Hmm now I want to go see what Dr. Sev has to say. He was impressed by the other chick who claimed she was a psychologist/therapist/whatever in one of the earlier threads, but this chris chick doesn't come close to that one. :)