The Hipster Fundamentalist /Mark Driscoll MERGED

[GryffindorFTW]

Apparently Mark Driscoll has just come out ...with a new book about marriage.* (Eh? Eh? :lol: ) The book purports to give marriage advice, but from the excerpts I've read it's more like a huge entry from Marky's diary all about how women are dirty and he is a speshul snowflake who ought to be in charge.

For your snarking pleasure, a Christian blog called The Burner is reviewing it piecewise, and though the blogger seems to be fundie-lite himself, he's doing a pretty good job. There are only two articles up, as of now, but the snark is already flowing over there, and it looks like it will be a detailed and entertaining critique: theburnerblog.com/arts/books/mark-driscoll-thinks-wives-are-only-good-for-sex/

* His wife has a co-author credit, but something tells me Marky did all the writing on this one.

[debrand]

Considering that the blog owner is definitely NOT a feminist, it is pretty telling that even he found the book offensive.

This is from Driscoll's book

One night…I had a dream in which I saw some things that shook me to my core. I saw in painful detail Grace sinning sexually during a senior trip she took after high school when we had just started dating. It was like watching a film–something I cannot really explain but the kind of revelation I sometimes receive…Had I known about this sin, I would not have married her. But God told me to marry Grace, I loved her, I had married her as a Christian, we were pregnant, and I was a pastor with a church plant filled with young people who were depending on me. (11-12)

We discussed on another thread that Driscoll thinks that he gets psychic messages showing him the wrongs that other people have done. That is weird and makes me question the man's sanity.

Day after day, for what became years, I spent hours meeting with people untangling the sexual knots in their life, reading every book and every section of the Bible I could find that related to their needs…I had a church filled with single young women who were asking me how they could stop being sexually ravenous and wait for a Christian husband, then I’d go home to a wife whom I was not sexually enjoying. One particularly low moment occurred when a newly saved married couple came in to meet with me. I prayed, then asked how I could serve them. She took charge of the meeting, explained how she really liked her body and sex, and proceeded to take out a list of questions she had about what was acceptable as a Christian for her to do with her husband. It was a very long and very detailed list…After they left the counseling appointment to get to work on the list of acceptable activities, I remember sitting with my head in my hands just moaning and asking God, “Do you really expect me to do this as a new Christian, without a mentor or a pastor, in the midst of my marriage, and hold on for the next fifty years?â€

Driscoll just seems like a pervert, doesn't he? Wow. Why not tell the couple that they can do any damn thing that they both agree as long as they don't pressure one another? Driscoll wouldn't have to hear a list and imagine all the ways that his wife falls short sexually.

As with many things in marriage, communication is key. When I came to the conclusion that the cure for a lot of my moodiness was having more frequent sex with my wife, I simply told her. Yes, it’s that simple… [He goes on to state that when he tried to talk to Grace about his depression, she talked too much about emotions] The truth was I needed to have more frequent sex with my wife, and we needed to discuss how that could happen…To make matters worse, seemingly every book I read by Christians on sex and marriage sounded unfair. Nearly every one said the husband had to work very hard to understand his wife, to relate to her and when he did that to her satisfaction then, maybe, she would have sex with him as a sort of reward.

Some couples use [anal sex] to prevent pregnancy. In conjunction with the rhythm method of birth control in which normal penis-vagina intercourse is suspended on a woman’s days of fertility, it is possible to use anal sex as an option. (186)

What? I don't understand why women willingly follow this guy. Also, how could a man who loves his wife treat her in this manner?

The knee jerk defense of Driscoll in the comments are interesting.

[debrand]

Reading the comments, I came across the interesting point that Driscoll and his wife were both sexually active before their marriage. Because he converted after marriage, I am going to assume that he was not a virgin when he met his wife. That makes his anger over his wife's highschool fling hyprocritical.

[GryffindorFTW]

We discussed on another thread that Driscoll thinks that he gets psychic messages showing him the wrongs that other people have done. That is weird and makes me question the man's sanity.

I seem to recall these "revelations" being almost exclusively sexual in nature.

[Shina]

I seem to recall these "revelations" being almost exclusively sexual in nature.

Which means he's fantasizing about other people fucking, and then telling them about his creepy fantasies. Eww. Eww. And did I mention ewwwww!

Like I needed another reason to stay the hell away from him and his churches.

[debrand]

http://theburnerblog.com/arts/books/mar ... -marriage/

Here is a second review on the another section of the book.

These are all quotes from Driscoll's book

In this season we shifted into ministry-and-family mode, neglecting our intimacy and failing to work through our issues. This became apparent to me when my pregnant wife came home from a hair appointment with her previously long hair (that I loved) chopped off and replaced with a short mommish haircut. She asked what I thought, and could tell from the look on my face. She had put a mom’s need for convenience before being a wife. She wept. (11)

I've gotten hair cuts that my husband expressed dislike for but he's never made me weep. Of course, my husband doesn't think that my hair is his or that cutting it has anything to do with my love for him.

[JesusFightClub]

http://theburnerblog.com/arts/books/mark-driscoll-chauvinist-views-on-appropriate-roles-in-marriage/

Here is a second review on the another section of the book.

These are all quotes from Driscoll's book

In this season we shifted into ministry-and-family mode, neglecting our intimacy and failing to work through our issues. This became apparent to me when my pregnant wife came home from a hair appointment with her previously long hair (that I loved) chopped off and replaced with a short mommish haircut. She asked what I thought, and could tell from the look on my face. She had put a mom’s need for convenience before being a wife. She wept. (11)

I've gotten hair cuts that my husband expressed dislike for but he's never made me weep. Of course, my husband doesn't think that my hair is his or that cutting it has anything to do with my love for him.[/

quote]

OMG. What a pair of idiots, him for saying anything but "You look beautiful!" and her for putting up with him.

Realistically one's partner has now and again fashion choices one doesn't agree with. In that case, the person is still your beautiful/handsome (in your eyes) lovable partner. I would be ashamed of making someone I disliked feel so bad about their looks they wept, let alone my spouse.

[formergothardite]

Once I dyed my hair bright red, I asked what my husband thought of it and he said he didn't care for it but it was my hair. And that was that. No weeping. I really think he is some sort of crazed cult leader who manages to package himself as a super cool pastor.

[margiebargie]

Apparently Mark Driscoll has just come out ...with a new book about marriage.* (Eh? Eh? :lol: ) The book purports to give marriage advice, but from the excerpts I've read it's more like a huge entry from Marky's diary all about how women are dirty and he is a speshul snowflake who ought to be in charge.

For your snarking pleasure, a Christian blog called The Burner is reviewing it piecewise, and though the blogger seems to be fundie-lite himself, he's doing a pretty good job. There are only two articles up, as of now, but the snark is already flowing over there, and it looks like it will be a detailed and entertaining critique: theburnerblog.com/arts/books/mark-driscoll-thinks-wives-are-only-good-for-sex/

* His wife has a co-author credit, but something tells me Marky did all the writing on this one.

Doh. You got me there. I'm surprised he hasn't come out yet because he seems to have some real issues. But then after reading this thread I think he's probably more of a raging pervert than a closeted gay guy. I find it hilarious that he thinks his sexual fantasies are "revelations".

[DomWackTroll]

Well, we all know that Mark Driscoll gave the a-okay to husband-on-wife "sodomy" some time ago, but according to this review, he's now saying that penetration of the husband is cool with him, too: "Although some Christian authors comment on the ethics of a husband sodomizing his wife, I have yet to find any who contemplate the reverse. Yet the Driscolls give explicit instructions to wives about how they might sodomize their husbands in a pleasurable way (p. 188)... What about a husband for whom such an activity might stir up homosexual desires that he has never experienced before engaging in this activity with his wife?"

dennyburk.com/my-review-of-mark-driscolls-real-marriage/

Am I a bad person if I admit I'm waiting with bated breath for the Bayly post on this? Tim will be all in a lather.

[ThisOlGirl]

I have many opinions about why Mark Driscoll is the way he is. I'll be the first to admit that those opinions are probably inaccurate and colored by the fact that for some reason, that "man" brings out the petty, ugly Mean Girl in me like no other. That being said, the nicest thing I can say about him is that he probably smells like Axe body spray(and that ain't a compliment). The ugliest thing I can say about him involves the word(?) "micropeen".

I won't be at all surprised when a scandal comes out involving Driscoll, one of his married female congregants and/or some underage high school girl (possibly married female congregant's daughter).

[DomWackTroll]

Apologies for not seeing this thread before I started another one about Driscoll's new book.

[Witsec1]

DomWackTroll's thread is here: viewtopic.php?f=8&t=6558 - maybe mods can merge?

So, a Christian young ladies who has kept herself pure for her husband goes to marital counseling with Mark Driscoll, and he tells them "Baby Jesus wants you to take it in the @ss?"

And, yes, love how his sexual fantasies are visions from the Lord.

I thought there was some flirting going on between Driscoll and the more conservative misogynists like Doug Wilson and the Baylys. I wonder what they will say, esp. the bit DWT quoted about wife sodomizing the husband...

[debrand]

Apologies for not seeing this thread before I started another one about Driscoll's new book. Here's the girl-on-boy anal sex stuff I posted there:

"Although some Christian authors comment on the ethics of a husband sodomizing his wife, I have yet to find any who contemplate the reverse. Yet the Driscolls give explicit instructions to wives about how they might sodomize their husbands in a pleasurable way (p. 188)... What about a husband for whom such an activity might stir up homosexual desires that he has never experienced before engaging in this activity with his wife?"

dennyburk.com/my-review-of-mark-driscolls-real-marriage/

Is this a different review of the same book?

http://www.dennyburk.com/my-review-of-m ... -marriage/

Chapter 7 narrates Grace’s story as a sexual assault victim and offers some practical guidance to others who bear the scars of sexual abuse

That is interesting. I had no idea that his wife was a sexual abuse victim. That makes me wonder if past abuse conditioned her to accept what appears to be a borderline abusive relationship with her husband.

Although some Christian authors comment on the ethics of a husband sodomizing his wife6, I have yet to find any who contemplate the reverse. Yet the Driscolls give explicit instructions to wives about how they might sodomize their husbands in a pleasurable way (p. 188).

Of course, Mark does. :lol: Hey, if it makes each person happy, I do not care what Grace puts up Mark's butt but how can they condemn man on man sex when they engage in anal themselves?

[DomWackTroll]

I thought there was some flirting going on between Driscoll and the more conservative misogynists like Doug Wilson and the Baylys.

Yes, there was. Tim could not resist Mark's manly manhood. But he's since changed his tune, and I can only imagine that his minions are emailing him frantically over this one, begging for a post.

As for Doug Wilson, he just had Driscoll speak at one of his events a few months ago. His blog commenters were not happy about it.

[DomWackTroll]

Yes, debrand, it's a review of the same book. I'm sorry for the confusion. I didn't know if I should repost the anal stuff here or wait and see if the mods merged the threads.

[Jenesis Jexodus]

This guy is majorly sick in the head. Only someone who is just as sick as he is would find what he said relevant or valid in any way.

[mirele]

Mark Driscoll can kiss my ass.

I've posted on both threads over there at the Fuller blog. I'm pretty blunt, even if I don't cuss him out (which is seriously what he deserves). Driscoll is just the largest example of many, many, many pastors across the USA who live in a bubble where all women are definitely second place. There's no woman in his life, not even his wife Grace, who can tell him to to sit down and shut the fuck up. And this is repeated in millions of households where men follow these damned pastors who teach this bullshit.

Sorry, I'm losing my cool...but Driscoll really makes me pissy. I have to remind myself that a lot of men (including my boyfriend) are not like that.

[BravaAmica]

Well, we all know that Mark Driscoll gave the a-okay to husband-on-wife "sodomy" some time ago, but according to this review, he's now saying that penetration of the husband is cool with him, too: "Although some Christian authors comment on the ethics of a husband sodomizing his wife, I have yet to find any who contemplate the reverse. Yet the Driscolls give explicit instructions to wives about how they might sodomize their husbands in a pleasurable way (p. 188)... What about a husband for whom such an activity might stir up homosexual desires that he has never experienced before engaging in this activity with his wife?"

dennyburk.com/my-review-of-mark-driscolls-real-marriage/

Am I a bad person if I admit I'm waiting with bated breath for the Bayly post on this? Tim will be all in a lather.

So he discovered pegging? Big deal.

[snarkbillie]

Once I dyed my hair bright red, I asked what my husband thought of it and he said he didn't care for it but it was my hair. And that was that. No weeping. I really think he is some sort of crazed cult leader who manages to package himself as a super cool pastor.

My current haircut is not liked by my husband. He won't say that though. He keeps saying "What is important is whether or not you like it." :lol: I think he's worried that if he says he doesn't like it that it will hurt my feelings.

[BravaAmica]

Day after day, for what became years, I spent hours meeting with people untangling the sexual knots in their life, reading every book and every section of the Bible I could find that related to their needs…I had a church filled with single young women who were asking me how they could stop being sexually ravenous and wait for a Christian husband, then I’d go home to a wife whom I was not sexually enjoying. One particularly low moment occurred when a newly saved married couple came in to meet with me. I prayed, then asked how I could serve them. She took charge of the meeting, explained how she really liked her body and sex, and proceeded to take out a list of questions she had about what was acceptable as a Christian for her to do with her husband. It was a very long and very detailed list…After they left the counseling appointment to get to work on the list of acceptable activities, I remember sitting with my head in my hands just moaning and asking God, “Do you really expect me to do this as a new Christian, without a mentor or a pastor, in the midst of my marriage, and hold on for the next fifty years?â€

I call bullshit. Who takes a list of sexually explicit activities in for approval by one's pastor?! He embellished this, methinks. These sound like set ups for porn films, quite honestly.

I can hardly wait for this mega-pastor's sex scandal. It's only a matter of time.

[debrand]

So he discovered pegging? Big deal.

Well, it is a big deal if he thinks that anal sex is only permissible for heterosexual couples. Really, why is a wife using a dildo on her husband better than a man having anal sex with a man? That makes no sense.

[BravaAmica]

Well, it is a big deal if he thinks that anal sex is only permissible for heterosexual couples. Really, why is a wife using a dildo on her husband better than a man having anal sex with a man? That makes no sense.

It doesn't make any sense, I agree. And having a wife perfom anal sex on her husband with a dildo is no different than two men engaging in anal sex in my opinion. Consenting adults, private bedroom, do what pleases you and your partner(s).

By "big deal" I meant that millions of hetero couples engage in pegging and he's making it out to be some brand new experience he discovered all on his own.

[Witsec1]

My current haircut is not liked by my husband. He won't say that though. He keeps saying "What is important is whether or not you like it." :lol: I think he's worried that if he says he doesn't like it that it will hurt my feelings.

Your husband cares about your feelings? He must not be a real man then. :roll:

[emmiedahl]

My husband really loves long, thick wavy hair (think Jessa Duggar). And it will never happen because of my hair texture, it looks straggly and gross (think Zsuzsu) when it gets past my shoulders. So he is never really happy with my haircuts. (shrug) but he pretends to like them and understands that I don't have the time or even the ability to look like Megan Fox.

It sounds like his wife is too vanilla for him, and he is using God as an excuse to demand anal.