Dougie Leads 30 "Intrepid" Men through the Amazon

[watchdog]

http://www.visionforumdotcom/news/blogs ... 11/01/9006

Intrepid, my foot. If one of those anacondas dropped into Dougie's boat, he'd wet his pants and squeal like a little girl just like any other red-blooded American male (or female).

Manly men! Plus a few "half" men. Note Dougie's "manly" posture.

For a mere $48 you can access the Amazon Adventure "official tour website." That Dougie never passes up an opportunity to fleece minister to the faithful.

[watchdog]

AnnieC305:

Manly men take a guided tour of the Amazon. Cool trip, sure, but "manly"?

If you want to take a "manly" trip, take your tail to the nearest Federal Building and sign it up for a four year guided tour of Afghanistan. Or at least encourage your sons and the sons of your followers to do so when they come of age.

Then I, for one, will consider you "manly".

Burris:

Doug is on vacation in the Amazon, a tourist, and he's charging people for access to the harrowing tale. I'm not in the least bit surprised.

I'm curious not only what the locals think of that pompous popinjay, but also what long-term missionaries think.

SnarkyJan:

What this needs is a soundtrack of Nelson Eddy warbling "Stouthearted Men".

watchdog:

Dinner? (The other other white meat.)

ChickeyMonkey:

I keep hearing the "Men in Tights" song whenever someone types "manly men."

"We're men, MANLY men, we're men in tights.

[Gay voice] Yes!"

"When you're in a fix just call for the men in tights!

WE'RE BUTCH!"

flyonthewall:

Some of those intrepid men (boys) look very pale, like they hardly see the light of day. There's Peter B again with his buffalo stance.

AnnieC305, I agree with you on principle but I feel safer with them not in the military.

pippa2:

hahahahahaha, why can't these people just be normal and say they are on a holiday, like everybody else...Pff, self-absorbed weirdos.

Clementinee.freekatie:

"I cut down trees, I wear high heels, suspenders and a bra, I wish I was I girlie just like my dear mama! I'm a lumberjack and..."

Doug really likes to play dress-up. When he was in Scotland, it was the three piece tweed suit with the dotted bow tie, very Oscar Wilde *ahem*:

http://www.visionforum.com/news/blogs/d ... S_6-17.jpg

The classic foreign correspondent uniform while rescuing orphans in Haiti:

http://www.visionforum.com/news/blogs/doug/IMG_9574.jpg

Channeling Indiana Jones in the Amazonas:

http://www.visionforum.com/news/blogs/d ... 0-2530.jpg

The English boarding school look, together with his new interns, all very good looking young men:

http://www.visionforum.com/news/blogs/d ... 202009.jpg

Tuxedo at the San Antonio Independent Christian Film Festival - Doug is the only person wearing a tux, all the others are wearing suits:

http://www.visionforum.com/news/blogs/d ... vening.jpg

And then the lovely "just married" photo:

http://www.visionforum.com/news/blogs/d ... dpeter.jpg

More adoring looks - I've been trying to find a photo where Doug is looking at his wife with this adoring expression, but no luck so far.

http://www.visionforum.com/news/blogs/doug/IMG_8819.jpg

http://www.visionforum.com/news/blogs/doug/IMG_0571.jpg

debrand:

The muscles on the man in green who is carring a knife is defrauding me.

This makes it sound as if they are the first people into the Amazon but both women and men go on these types of trips. I would love to go and it would annoy the heck out of me if my husband went without me.

I wish that we had a fund for this site. We could save up to go on kick ass tours and call them womanly woman tours. Handcuff and doggie could come so we might have to change the name to Womanly Women And A Couple Of Guys Tours.

Austin:

Is Dougie Phillips the one about 1/3 of the way over from the right with the wide-legged stance? Because if so, someone posted on a thread recently a photo of Dougie in church with the same type of unnaturally wide-legged stance.

Me wonders if Dougie has some sort of. . . uh. . . problem with his manly parts. Something that may call for some Lamisil or Lotrimin, or at least a generous shake of extra-strength Gold Bond powder?

[watchdog]

Sanveanne:

Austin, he does always look as if he's trying to air things out, doesn't he?

Debrand, I totally noticed Green Dude too.

formerGothardite:

I would totally be up for those trips! I bet we would get a whole lot more out of them them Dougie and crew. We just need to drop all of our morals and learn how to scam people into paying us to take these trips like they do.

flyonthewall:

The Green Dude is not yet 18. Yes, I feel old.

Mama.Junebug.freekatie:

You guys are all good, but Clem & Austin FTW!

Just had to say so. Also love the Men In Tights references and more. P. Bradreck has been riding the buffalo since he was a late teen. There's a mention of him in one of Jennifer Epstein's tales of Phillips-related woe. PB was an unemotional and unyielding enforcer for DP at a homeschool convention where JE just wanted to talk to DP. I don't mean to threadjack and certainly not in the direction of Mrs. E -- but ole buffalo guy has been a Phillips acolyte for-blessed-ever, it's evident.

formerGothardite:

I thought Dougie was the one with his leg propped up on the boat trying to look courageous, noble and wise and instead looking like a complete fool.

clibbyjo:

LOL Clem, those pics with descriptions are hilarious!!! He does like to play dress up.

HeathenHeart:

I believe Man in Green is none other than Joshua Titus Phillips. And he's definitely defrauding me, too.

Actually, looking at this picture, I'm beginning to wonder if BE-all and the milkman had a thing going on 17-18 years ago. I really don't see a lot of Dougie in him.

gustava:

He's homosexual but doesn't know it.

margiebargie:

Yes. He probably thinks the devil is after him when he's attracted to guys. No, Doug, you're just gay. It's alright.

margiebargie:

Ha! I immediately thought of the lumberjack song, too.

And all the different outfits - he's like fundie Ken.

[watchdog]

Karsaroni:

Gawd. JT Phillips is so yummy. Whichever SAHD lands him is one lucky lass! Although he's still pretty young and is getting a taste of traveling and probably film making so I'm guessing he'll fall in step w/ the older Botkin bros, Nathan Darnell, etc. and stay unmarried so he can just have a good time. I will say, VF sure knows how to appeal to these young men w/ all of theses "adventures" disguised as "serving God". Other than Peter Bradrick and Doug himself, I wonder how many of those men are actually married. My guess is few.

The pics of Doug in his various costumes are hilarious! He truly disgusts me. I've never seen someone so self-aware as that man. He tries so hard to not pose by posing for the camera it's ridiculous. And his freakishly small hands really bug me. Poor Be-All. Those small hands can't bode well for her. I'm pretty sure Be-All is as tall as Doug and (not to be rude) but she just might weigh more than him.

Jencendiary:

This trip, I swear to god, sounds like the setup to a porn. And that pic, and Dougie's costume fetish, are not changing my mind about this.

sableduck:

From dougie's blog: "Having successfully reached out to the Aguaruna tribe, delivered medicines and Bibles, set-up a clinic and researched the recent wave of vampire bat attacks against the children...Today, I led my team hacking our way with machetes through the most vine and flora dense water tributary I have ever seen in my life searching for anaconda snakes. Thank you for remembering to pray for our safety and the success of our mission. We are especially grateful because close to 20% of my men have been temporarily incapacitated through sickness. We all knew the risks when we came here."

This man makes me so sputtering mad. Researching vampire bat attacks? Setting up a medical clinic? You and your poorly educated comrades have had the time and skills to do this? And why are you now "searching for anaconda snakes?" AND WHAT RISKS? Stop making this sound like it's anything more than it is--an interesting trip for little boys who want, more than anything, to confirm their manhood. GROW THE F*CK UP ALREADY.

I guess it all just pisses me off because while they wander around talking about courage and sacrifice and honor like they know what the words mean, I am surrounded by strong men and women who daily put their lives on the line for real. Dougie just strikes me like a little boy playing with his toy soldiers.

kate .canningpantryforum:

Is there no Justice?

Seriously, why is J. Titus Phillips alway in prominate photo-ready positions front and center and brother Justice Phillips is always hidden in the back if there at all (I *think* he's the guy you can barely see way in the back, can just barely see his head)?

Is he slow brained? Secretly deformed? Embarassing problems? A less manly prop to market the manly empire (an empire manly enough for "man's man" Doug)?

Really, why is Dougie always pushing the one boy and hiding the other?

Caelem:

Does anyone know if Doug offered scholarships for families who wanted to go on this trip but couldn't afford it? It sounds a little too magnanimous of him, but I like surprises.

Mama.Junebug.freekatie:

Military mom here - what makes me hurl-ready is the legions of semi-witted fans out there paying to see this ... this woebegone "reality show."

Setting up a clinic? my left hind leg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

People are literally buying this?

I've thought about a field trip to a VF-ish, NCFIC church for quite some time, now, an anthropological foray. I don't think it'll happen. The first person who kvelled about Doug Phillips, I'd be ranting or at least throwing something and storming out.

Impossible to abide the people who take this mockery seriously, and support it!

uber frau:

I think I'm gonna barf. This guy is so far up his own arse he's nearly inside out. Hopefully Justice is totally embarrassed to have that moron for a father and is just keeping a low profile until he can escape and write a tell-all book.

brownbirdie:

Uh, Justice looks pretty manly to me: http://picasaweb.google.com/lh/view?una ... 2269656370

Am I the only one who thinks he's pretty good-looking, too?

Joly:

I liked this boy's comments about Doug's adventure

drpaleophd.blogspot.com

He says - "Having this guy in that much danger makes me nervous."

Sounds like maybe he's a little too concerned about his welfare....

cpennylane:

Maybe Justice is photo shy? Are Philips spawn allowed to be shy? I know the Pearls teach to beat your kids with plumbing supply until they aren't shy anymore, but I've always thought that was just them and the rest of the world has realized that it's not a crime to have a personality.

[watchdog]

Clementinee.freekatie:

Maybe he dreams about becoming one of Doug's "interns"... so they can do Manly Man-things together...

It looks like Justin is wearing lipstick in this photo:

http://picasaweb.google.com/lh/view?una ... 2269656370

And why is Doug out in the Amazonas SEARCHING FOR ANACONDAS???? I would like a freudian explanation here!

Is he subconciously out there hunting for c**k or is he out there to look for c**ks to cut into pieces with his machete? If he kills the gigantic jungle snakes/penises, maybe his lust for the real thing will go away?

Do we have any freudian therapists here who can elaborate?

kate .canningpantryforum:

Wouldn't that be nice. Dougie putting people ahead of marketing? Good thing Be-all and the ladies only want to learn to weave for 5 hours or it could get awkward.

MollyTrolley:

Looks like Justice has a pretty bad case of cystic acne in the picasa pix. Poor guy. Of course they wouldn't take him to a dermatologist.

spinster:

Hahaha! Thank you for posting this! I was looking for pics like these last night, as I tried to explain the "manly" thing to my boyfriend. He laughed at the one picture I found, so he will get a kick out of these!

doggie:

yets see if I got this straight. Hacked through the jingle means we had fun whacking at a branch that was in the way. We were asked to drop off a package that just happened to have medicine in it (no we did not fork over money for it) We also dumped a shitload of bibles on these poor heathens that we carried from the nearest store (pissed us off they used them to start cooking fires) Then we checked a cave with bats in it (when they flew we ran leaving smelly piles behind)

Hopewell:

HA! The Lumberjack Song!!! Wow--is that a blast from the past!

I guess Dougies likes spirited adventures with strong lads--this time he's pretending his Theodore Roosevelt, whose Amazon trip likely inspired him! Soon he'll be wearing pince nez and saying "Bully"

Jencendiary:

Justice is giving me a whole lot of fierce. Miss J. Alexander would approve. Though, Tyra would remind him to smize a little more.

Squeaky:

I admit it, that video makes me want to go to the Amazon & the Andes. And if JT Philips offered to escort me and machete vines out of my way (I'm a delicate thing after all) I would not say no to that either.

NJ:

No that's Peter Bradrick. He is Dougie's copy cat, although since all of Pete's photos are like that he might have a problem that some antifungal ointment should heal.

Jencendiary:

If Peter has it, Dougie probably does too.

Just. Sayin'.

[watchdog]

gardenvarietycitizen:

Costumes, indeed! It fits right in with the theme of their yearly catalog, doesn't it?

Meanwhile my sister is getting ready to take a tour of South America giving medical aid and advice... with the US Navy. Somehow I suspect they're slightly better prepared than these guys!

I have to agree with Burris, too - just have to wonder what more "normal" hardworking missionaries (and regular secular aid workers and NGO people, too) think of this group and its claims.

Artemis:

Has any one ever heard of this song?

'Oh Lord, it's hard to be humble

When you're perfect in every way.

I can't wait to look in the mirror

I get more good looking each day.

To know me is to love me

I must be a hell of a man.

Oh Lord, it's hard to be humble

But I'm doing the best I can'

Signature tune, perhaps?

Perhaps he has hemorrhoids and needs a suppository?

gardenvarietycitizen:

I haven't heard that one, but it certainly seems to fit.

That does remind me though of an old song by the "Austin Lounge Lizards" called "Jesus Loves Me (but he can't stand you!)" which includes the lines

"I'm going straight to heaven, boys, when I die,

'cause I've crossed every T and I've dotted every I

Why, my preacher tells me I'm god's kind of guy,

That's why Jesus loves me, but you're gonna fry."

ladypuglover:

For that mere $48, you can have ALL the mysteries the amazon explained for you. Never mind sciencetist have been studing these mysteries for years and still don't know the why and how but Dougie does!

Caelem:

My parents sing this all the time! I love this song!

Burris:

Anaconda hunting? LOL!

I wish I had something more profound to say in the face of Doug's shameless and almost-certainly dishonest self-promotion, but that bit about hunting anacondas cracked me up even more than his "research" into vampire bat attacks on children.

I hope Doug gets to save at least one brown child from the river before he has to go home. I'm sure there's still some time left in the trip for a photo-op like that.

NJ:

This is exactly the picture that is forming in my mind. Let's see, they have been there for about a week or so, right? That's not nearly enough time to set up a clinic. I know from personal experience. It's also not enough time to do even a half-ass research on the vampire bats. Doug is very fond of inflating his own resume, isn't he? Reminds me of the family I know whose son is in school to hopefully become an optometrist, but his family is saying that he is going to be a neurosurgeon.

emmyfair:

I'd never seen pictures of Doug before - I'm pretty sure he's so deep in the closet he's finding Christmas presents. It'd be better to just admit it, and live a happy, genuine life...

Elle:

Have you ever laughed so hard you choked on extra-spicy chili, and then felt your throat burn after hacking it out, jalepeno-residue making the itching burning worse? Well, neither had I until now. The pain I'm in is so worth how funny this is!

Elle:

Co-signed.

[watchdog]

Hane.engrishmessageboards:

To continue the musical theme, herewith the pertinent parts of a song by Martin Mull and Steve Martin (and, hey, if they got married, he'd be Steve Martin Mull!):

(Group of men singing in the background)

Men, men, men, men,

Men, men, men, men...

It's great to be on a ship with men

And sail across the sea-o,

We don't know where we'll land or when,

But it's great to be with men.

(It's great to be with men)

Men, men, men,

It's a ship all filled with men,

So batten down the ladies' room,

There's no one here but men!

Men, men, men, men

Men, men, men, men...

There's men above and men below

And men down in the galley,

There's Butch and Spike and Buzz and Biff

And one guy we call Sally!

(and one guy we call Sally!)

We're men and friends until the end

And none of us are sissies,

At night we sleep in separate beds

And blow each other kissies!

(and blow each other kissies!)

Men, men, men,

It's a ship all filled with men,

So throw your rubbers overboard,

There's no one here but men!

Amen (pronounced "Ahhhhh, men!")

I'd like to retitle this thread, substituting "insipid" for "intrepid."

NJ:

OMG I'm on the floor in stitches

Burris:

He's brave, brave, brave, Brave Sir Robin!

fundiefan1:

That picture of Dougie gazing yearningly at bow-legged Peter B...Wow.

If he is gay, that may explain his position on women. He can't live openly; he's forced to marry a girl and he doesn't want that. So he tries to make women disappear--they are literally not allowed to speak in his church, or even sing. He wants a men-only world where he can spend all his time with his manly buds.

These pictures are laughable. He's trying to make it out that they're on this dangerous mission into the wild and that they're facing all sorts of dangers--something chicks aren't tough enough to take. He's probably staying at a Holiday Inn.

I am also being defrauded by JT. If he does marry Elizabeth Botkin, they'll have awfully good looking kids.

ladypuglover:

Not seeing why they hide JT

http://picasaweb.google.com/lh/view?una ... 7261727554

Maybe it is because he likes wear kilts

http://picasaweb.google.com/lh/view?una ... 4196956066

or maybe it is because he isn't a big douche like his brother and dad

fundiefan1:

Also--fun fundie trivia. Bealle is pronounced "Belle."

ladypuglover:

I thin Be-all is better sounding for this be all family.

AthenaC:

A dangerous mission that 12,000 hippie kids a year take.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldne ... ckers.html

ladypuglover:

Stupid Dougie will speed this up lickty split.

NJ:

They are hiding Justice and promoting JT.

[watchdog]

ChickeyMonkey:

Every time I see this thread I start to sing, "Goin' on a Bear Hunt. Gonna catch a big one!" and that's all I know of the song off the top of my head.

Hane.engrishmessageboards:

"Dennis Moore, Dennis Moore, riding through the glen,

Dennis Moore, Dennis Moore, with his band of men;

Steals from the poor, gives to the rich:

Stupid bitch."

--Monty Python

thoughtful:

Dougie is clearly expecting a handsome waiter to bring him a Captain Morgan!

"Got a little Captain in you?"

MollyTrolley:

Christmas presents, heck! He's got one foot in Narnia.

liltwinstar:

Oh for the love of pete - that pic is ridiculous.

I think Doug just likes to play dress-up, seriously. Next thing you know he'll be in Moscow wearing a fur hat. And then in Japan wearing a kimono. And on and on.

Dude should just start a fashion blog. It would be cheaper.

emmyfair:

Christmas presents, heck! He's got one foot in Narnia.

hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Clementinee.freekatie:

Here you go ChickeyMonkey - just for you! Doug Philips as a swordsman!

http://www.visionforum.com/news/blogs/d ... 5/08/1212/

liltwinstar:

You can tell he's not super-deep into the fencing thing becuase he's not wearing fencing pants, just track pants (or maybe jeans? Hard to tell - although another guy is wearing jeans). Fencing pants are white (and tight). And fencing shoes are different too.

And see, I have no problem if he would be honest and say something like "I took a 6 week (or 8 week, or whatever) fencing class and boy, what a workout!" like normal people do. But given the inflated text, it sounds like he was training to be a fencing master. Which none of them are (otherwise they'd at least have the pants and shoes!)

And, from experience, you can't learn the "mental discipline" of fencing in a few classes. It's hard, hard work. Also, I took fencing in college (one semester, twice a week - so, what 30ish classes?) and it would have taken way more than that to accomplish all the "goals" he listed for the VF Interns.

And newsflash: you don't do "actual combat" in fencing. The tip is fairly blunt, and you get hits (points) when you sword bends a certain way. Still can hurt like hell, though, if you get it in, say, your inner thigh or your breast, but it's not "combat." Please.

ChickeyMonkey:

Thanks, Clementine, for that wonderful picture of Dougie playing dress-up and pretend.

My favorite gem from that page is this:

"At Vision Forum we recognize the terrible plight of arrogance and dishonor with young men who are ever learning, but incapable of demonstrating a spirit of honor and service to others."

I'm sure you do, Dougie. I'm sure you do.

darkplumaged:

Doug, a world of international dress awaits you! This year, you should expand your horizons--try a dashiki, a keffiyeh, a turban, or some lederhosen.

[watchdog]

thoughtful:

VF is missing a great merchandising opportunity -- the Dougie Dress-up Doll! A paper doll, or an "action figure" (manly manly men can't be dolls, you know) would be soooooo much fun!

love:

This thread is hilarious!!!

I definitely think that VF is missing out by not having the international superstar Doug Phillips action figure. ha!

Clementinee.freekatie:

I just found this gem on Doug's blog.

How a Husband Looks at His Wife

One of my favorite images from the event because of the way that Mr. Thomas and Mrs. Thomas give a knowing look at each other. Mr. and Mrs. Thomas are the parents of the winner of the Jamestown 400: Our National Treasure Hunt.

http://www.visionforum.com/news/blogs/d ... 7/06/2720/

cpennylane:

But... I don't want to be forced to purchase from VF. I would have to have that.

acheronbeach:

Sometimes treatment doesn't work or is just too horrible to take, either. Boyfriend has bad skin and he's seen several dermatologists who have told him that it's Accutane or nothing. And considering the side-effects of Accutane...

darkplumaged:

Clementinee, truly, a picture (or two) is worth a thousand words.

The photo of Doug and Peter is more unnerving every time I look at it.

AthenaC:

The look on Doug's face is priceless, but the look on Peter's face is too. Like maybe it's dawning on him that this is one of the "bad touches" his mom told him about.

SnarkyJan:

I'm sure you do, Dougie. I'm sure you do.I'm equally sure he knows how to cure them.

JeffR:

What blows my mind is that anyone can look at this and think that this trip is anything but a vacation. I suppose their wives must be angry that they're stuck at home with 4 kids while they're out vacationing, but I suppose the wives are dumb enough to buy into their BS about this being a risky adventure.

Joly:

Look closely at that picture of them on the pew. It almost looks photoshopped. They are too close. Where is there room for their legs in that position? The younger one would have to be sitting on doug's lap. It's really weird.

[watchdog]

Hane.engrishmessageboards:

*waves hi at JeffR*

OR they're so relieved to have them out of their hair for awhile that they're partying down! (It's always like a little vacation when a high-maintenance spouse is away from home.)

JeffR:

*hi*

Good point. I imagine those guys are so obnoxious that having them take a vacation is a relief.

watchdog:

Still searching for that elusive anaconda!

This was a bizarre update:

They're grateful because close to 20% of them have been stricken with what I can only imagine to be the South American equivalent of Montezuma's revenge or malaria or something equally unpleasant?

From Dougie's speshul Amazon site (full access available for just $48):

Can DP compose a paragraph without using the word "manly" at least once? "A refreshingly vigorous, sometimes wet, often sweaty, manly foray into a mysterious and unusual world"? It sounds more like a gay porn flick than a "mission trip."

Not all the wives are stuck at home:

Access to Be-all's updates is included with your $48 payment.

sableduck:

The better part of a week? They are solving the mysteries of the Amazon, setting up medical clinics, distributing Bibles, looking for anaconda, and doing Important Scientific Research on bats in less than a week?

This is like National Lampoon meets Indiana Jones.

thoughtful:

Oh, noes -- 20% of them (I like the fact that he actually did the math!) are sick?

I'm tellin' ya -- like Dougie, they should have had the rum:

[Deleted12]

The Amazon trip might be my favorite VF... outing... ever.

[watchdog]

AthenaC:

There's too much snark in this thread; I can't even compose a worthy countersnark. You have defeated me, ladies.

doggie:

they are so manly that I bet they did not follow the guides and did something stupid and got sick.

watchdog:

Oh, that's rich. Air-conditioned, huh? Sort of gives a whole new meaning to that "refreshingly vigorous, sometimes wet, often sweaty, manly foray into a mysterious and unusual world."

It appears they're taking a tour similar to this:

http://www.greentracks.com/Riverboat-Ex ... nation.htm

But to hear Dougie tell it you'd think they were setting out on their own to "do great works of dominion" when in fact they're traveling on an air-conditioned tour boat. Asshat is right!

One question: How are they getting around the 19-traveler limit?

darkplumaged:

Doug's phoniness is so completely obvious to anyone who takes even a minute to look more closely at him and his activities. I can't believe that people are still drinking the VF Kool-Aid.

ChickeyMonkey:

I think it's even more hilarious that his initials are DP. Yes, I am 14, how did you know?

AthenaC:

You really need to ask?

Clementinee.freekatie:

Mama.Junebug.freekatie:

Peru, you say? One of the Sreven boys is in Peru. No coincidences there, are there? and it's not even the photographer one.

AthenaC:

There's a Serven who is currently a VF intern.

thoughtful:

Ah, yes, that is most importantly the thing that got Doug and the VF folks interested.

It's a shame ambiance can't be put in a spray bottle like a perfume. That would be a great item for the VF catalogue:

Bygone Century Ambiance - $58.00

[watchdog]

gustava:

Two per twin bed: Manly bonding.

Jencendiary:

It sounds like a new line by BPAL. The other perfumes in the collection could be Historical Revisionist Musk & Post-Colonial Angst.

fundiefan1:

Is Dougie trying to position the Amazon journey as a missionary trip? They seem more interested in striking manly poses and wearing hats than helping people. Exactly what is it's purpose? And when he went to Haiti after the earthquake, did he do anything besides strike poses for the camera? How can you provide assistance when you have no medical or construction skills and just stay for a week or two?

JT doesn't have to worry about giving up his travels after he marries and has kids. The wife will stay home, like Kelly Bradrick, while his life continues unchanged.

thoughtful:

Hey, they could have a whole line based on famous scents of the past:

My Sin, Your Sin, Everybody's Sin (except mine are forgiven -- neener, neener!)

White Shoulders Hidden Under Four Layers of Dowdy Fabric

English Leather Riding Crop (for those times when plumbing line isn't dressy enough)

L'Air du Temps Perdu

LongWindedSong

Shall I Mar (all of your hopes for having a life as a free woman?)

Chanel #5 Titus #2

meda:

"historical revisionist musk"... I love it. The whole thread has had me in stitches.

AthenaC:

Brimstone.

For a man or a woman.

Available only at Nordstrom.

kpmom:

Very glad I was neither eating nor drinking when I read this. I think Sall I Mar was my favorite, but they were all great.

thoughtful:

Glad I could amuse you!

I was trying to do something with some other names, but Obsession pretty much would stay the same, and Joy would be out altogether.

watchdog:

Here are some ideas:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/08/0 ... b%20Mackie

There are several appropriate ones in there, but I think "Delicious Closet Queen" might take top honors.

kishiria:

Uhm...vampire bats don't attack humans. They really aren't terribly dangerous except to cattle. Dougie is really laying it on thick--probably selected "vampire bats attacking children!" because it sounds scary and like something heroic for these MEN! to do.

[watchdog]

watchdog:

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2010/08/ ... 9501.shtml

http://www.allvoices.com/contributed-ne ... 5-children

Still not sure what Dougie's band of manly men could do. This story was from August, and according to that second article, it takes some 15 hours by boat to reach the remote area where the attacks occurred. Emergency teams were said to have been dispatched immediately, so the VF guys are a little late.

AthenaC:

This is what the VF had to say about the trip:

Charting Manhood in a Lost World: Vision Forum Takes Fathers and Sons into the Amazon

When Ernest Shackleton recruited his men for the Antarctic, he encouraged them to join him on a “hazardous journey.†Our mission into the heart of the Peruvian and Brazilian rainforest may not be as perilous as the journey of Shackleton, but it is a mission of discovery as some members of our team meet with indigenous tribes which not too long ago were still practicing headhunting and cannibalism. One part father-and-son adventure, one part scientific investigation, and one part Gospel mission, the 2011 Amazon Expedition will take men deep into Amazonia. Approximately one hundred years after Teddy Roosevelt took his son Kermit on a voyage of discovery down the Amazon, our father and son teams will: (a) experience a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to muck through the Amazon like a man, with men, on a manly adventure; (b) learn about the great battles with environmental pantheism from the epicenter of the fight; © investigate mysteries of the ancient world; and (d) observe exotic and strange creatures, evaluating them from a distinctively Creationist perspective. Make sure to subscribe to our field reports!

Status: Please pray for our team, for their safety and for their mission. Regretfully, the trip is closed and we are not able to accommodate any more guests. Vision Forum will be making an announcement in the month of December about how you can get video reports and stories sent to you from our team on the ground in the Amazon.

http://www.visionforumministries.org/is ... _2011.aspx

watchdog:

See, I told you DP couldn't compose a sentence without using the word "manly"! Methinks he doth boast too much about his "manliness." Insecure much?

ladypuglover:

You made me laugh so hard that I almost woke up my poor husband and kids. Even the dogs glared at me but the dogs just don't get snark like the cats. So from me and my kitties thank you.

cpennylane:

Every time I hear men talking about "men stuff" I have to remember this episode of "It's Always Sunny."

thoughtful:

You're welcome!

Yes, gentle dogs just don't get the joy of snarking. Mine just want to play and eat and be petted -- not a sardonic bone in their bodies.

I love the fact that even the tripod leg is there to look like the Captain's sword. And that the similarity was strong enough to catch the attention of a person who doesn't drink, doesn't read magazines, and almost never sees TV ads, so I'd probably seen less of the Captain Morgan logo than most people!

Soulhuntress:

I don't think Miss Dougie could handle an actual mission trip. Captain Morgan? No words.

GolightlyGrrl:

Green Dude is not yet 18. (Looks sheepishly for Chris Hanson from Dateline's "To Catch a Predator.)

debrand:

Well, if his sisters have to be careful not to attract male notice then he should be aware of how tempting he is. Why isn't this young man in a burqua?

debrand:

The title of the photo makes it sound as if the group has no other means to get fresh water. I doubt that the group is short of supplies.

Into the Amazon: Drinking Fresh Water From Vines As A Survival Tactic

[watchdog]

OnceModestTwiceShy:

ChickeyMonkey:

Um, how are they recharging the batteries for all their equipment while they're deep in the heart of darkness?

hoipolloi:

If they are indeed on the same Ayapua as described thusly (The boat has ten comfortable and spacious air conditioned cabins with twin-size beds... nine double cabins and one single cabin. All cabins have private baths, writing desk and wardrobe. There is a library and dining room, both with air conditioning, and a data projector is provided for lectures and movies. The bar serving alcoholic and non-alcoholic beverages as well as snacks and both covered and uncovered observation areas are on the top deck.), I'd say that they're easily able to recharge anything they want, including their martini glasses.

thoughtful:

I love a good G&S parody, and DougieStewie pretty much sums it up!

HeathenHeart:

What is Dougie trying to do to me with this picture of JT?

http://www.visionforumDOTcom/news/blogs ... 1/01/9026/

watchdog:

Um... which equipment?

petal789:

Why do all of Doug's multi-generational vision-casting trips & events always have to be celebrating the anniversary of some random event....

"This year marks the 100th anniversary of the discovery of the Inca stronghold Machu Picchu by famed explorer Hiram Bingham. It is also nearly the 100th anniversary of the historic father-and-son expedition into the Amazon down the River of Doubt by Teddy Roosevelt and his son Kermit"

Therefore, Doug needs to go on a manspedition?

I really don't get this fixation but then again I really don't get anything about him.

petal789:

I need to back away from Doug's amazon website but somehow I just can't (yet!)

What on earth does this mean?

"Mystery number five is the story of exploration and manhood. Why are there not more men going into the Amazon or around the world doing great works of dominion? What are the stories of discoveries from the past, and what are their relevance for today—a very important question for us to answer as we travel as fathers and sons on this great expedition."

What on earth is a great work of dominion? is that the part where they passed out bibles and chased off the vampire bats before hopping back on their air conditioned tour boat?

[watchdog]

AthenaC:

Somehow it doesn't surprise me that manhood is a mystery to Doug.

ChickeyMonkey:

I understood it as DP & Co. were roughing it, but apparently not. I know. I should've learned by now that what Dougie says and what really happens isn't the same thing. I thought that if they're roughing it (you know, the opposite of the boat described above) they would run out of batteries for their cameras and sound equipment.

As for recharging their other equipment, well, that's part of discovering what being manly is all about...

What happens in the Amazon, stays in the Amazon.

Artemis:

They think they're being biblical. but actually, they're being Greek.

Classical, 5th Century Athens Greek.

Women stay in the home and bear children: sex with them is for procreative purposes only. Women spin, weave, housekeep, bear and raise children and stay in th gynecion - the women's quarters.

'A woman's best fame is not to be spoken about outside her house' as the Athenians believed.

Men are for love (eros), friendship (philia), affection (storge), and altruistic love (agape). Rational converstaion, fellowship, bonding, war. working together - are all for men. The ultimate in a spearatist society.

What makes me laugh is that they think it's biblical . . . they are pagans to the core in their lifestyles.

AthenaC:

Oh, GROSS! Doug has my exact same binoculars.

I haz a sad now.

cpennylane:

Well, men aren't going into the Amazon in droves because it is expensive. Also, people have different interests. I would love to go explore the Amazon, but I would prefer to do things like pay for my health insurance and car insurance and buy food and pay my electric bill. I guess I could just not do those things for a few months, head off to the Amazon, and come back and live in a box down by the river; however I feel that might be too manly for this girl.

I'm also wondering what a great work of dominion is.

And on an OT - I keep seeing the phrase "heart of darkness" but I thought that was in the Congo? I never read it, so either I'm missing something (very possible) or I'm too literal minded (also possible), or (PLEASE) Dougie is just pretending that he read Conrad.

AthenaC:

Good catch. You're right, the book is about Africa.

ChickeyMonkey:

I know The Heart of Darkness is the book about Africa (the Congo, right?), but it just seemed to fit their idea of primitive peoples living in the Amazon that neeeeeed them to save their savage souls. I mean the title, not the book as a whole.

Honestly, I read the book on my own and suddenly found myself at the end of the book and totally didn't remember what had happened in the story. It's not that long of a book and I'm usually really good about remembering stories and books, but this one? Nope. Same with the ending of 1984. I totally didn't understand the very ending paragraphs of the book, for some reason. Massive circuit misfiring? I dunno, but I reread the ending several times to try to make some sense of it and couldn't. I probably should've waited a day or two, but didn't.

All that to say I'm not an idiot, I know The Heart of Darkness takes place in Africa, but I like the title for Dougie's views on the Amazon.

AthenaC:

Sorry, didn't mean to be patronizing.

ChickeyMonkey:

No, that's OK, AthenaC, I didn't take it that way. I just wanted to be clear that I wasn't edumacated at the SOTDRT. No worries.

thoughtful:

Going somewhere, especially where there are brown or tan people, and telling them that their whole history, way of life, and beliefs are crap that need to be replaced by the VF version of Christianity.

[watchdog]

SnarkyJan:

The real-life Teddy Roosevelt would have despised Dougie and his assemblage of poseurs.

hoipolloi:

ChickeyMonkey - Because Dougie posted the name & a photo of the Ayapua on his blog 2 or 3 days ago, I was able to google "Ayapua" and "Amazon" and found what is probably the VF's Amazon transportation.

A corollary to Dougie saying one thing and doing another is, of course, "Do as I say, not as I do" which could be the one thing that unites all of these fundie wacks. Why the sheeple keep supporting, defending, and giving these lying jerks so much money is beyond me.

love:

I wonder this too. Why is always an anniversary? It makes no sense to me. But I agree with you, petal, i really don't get anything about him either.

hoipolloi:

If you begin with the premise that it's all and only about him, then Dougie's actions make some kind of sense.

For example: the 100th anniversary of Hiram Bingham's expedition. This, like many other "anniversary" activities Dougie likes to do & boast about, concerns reflected glory. Somehow, in his twisted little me-mind, if he celebrates someone else's achievement(s), the celebration actually causes the original achiever's glory, bravery, piety, etc. to redound on Dougie. So, at least in Dougie's mind, the original achievement then becomes identified with Dougie as much if not more than the original person.

cindyluvs24:

This is how the movie "Deliverance " started out.

cpennylane:

I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be insulting. I wasn't sure where the HoD reference was even coming from. And I am far, far too literal on occasion.

I also read 1984 and didn't remember very much about the second half of the novel.

watchdog:

The latest...

Actual caption:

"Peter Bradrick climbs up the wire to the top of the Ayapua mast in his cowboy boots to pass a camera to Charles Vernier for a high altitude photo shot of the team."

Climbing a rope without a safety harness: Dumb

Climbing a rope without a safety harness in cowboy boots: Dumber

Check out the January 6th video update:

http://wwwDOTintotheamazon.org

Little boys Manly men wearing costumes and playing with walkie talkies in the woods on "a refreshingly vigorous, sometimes wet, often sweaty, manly foray into a mysterious and unusual world" performing "great works of dominion."

"How Some of the Idiots Men Board Our Jungle Boat"

hoipolloi:

Thank you for posting this. I tried but screwed up the photolink.

I'd say that this photograph removes all doubt that Peter Bradrick is an idiot.

JeffR:

That's such a brilliant reference and I never would have thought of it. Joseph Conrad's book really shows the dark side of Western colonialism as they tried to spread their religion and exploit native peoples, with the reasoning being that native people are inferior. It's Doug Phillips to a tee.

watchdog:

I just noticed in the second photo (the idiot shimmying across to the boat on the rope) that both he and the guy in the red plaid shirt sitting obliviously in the background fellowshipping with black t-shirt guy are showething their thighs! Isn't that considered defrauding and sinful? Or is that only when wimmins are present?

[watchdog]

debrand:

Did the crew give them permission to climb up the mast or is this just something that they decided to do on their own? I wonder how the people who own the boat feel about this group?

Greentracks, the company who owns the boat, has pictures on their blog of women aboard their ship. I wonder how the Vision Forum groups feels about the fact that women have taken this tour before them?

It is almost like the guys in the Vision Forum group feel that they invented manhood.

Bekah:

"Manly men on "a refreshingly vigorous, sometimes wet, often sweaty, manly foray into a mysterious and unusual world."

Did this remind anyone else of Brokeback Mountain?

I watched an episode of Destination Truth last week wherein they entered the Amazon to investigate the possible existance of a 30 metre anaconda. Maybe Dougie will find it.

watchdog:

Totally. Why do you think we keep quoting it?

Bekah:

Ah. So they are hunting the anaconda! Knew it. Explains the upper thigh action in those shorts, too.

apple1:

I have decided that DP's own actions and words (and photos LOL) are his own worst enemies. They speak volumes. The more he talks, "writes" (word used advisedly), and has himself photographed, the more telling it is. I honestly think there is no need to worry about his ilk taking over the world; they are too stupid. (Yes, I said that; VF interns, feel free to take it back).

thoughtful:

Ah, but it would be Dougie saying ...

brownbirdie:

Charles Vernier = Audri's brother, I presume?

watchdog:

aka "Quest for the Pocket Snake"

thoughtful:

SnarkyJan:

Falling off the rope in cowboy boots and without a safety harness: Priceless

[watchdog]

ChickeyMonkey:

Only an idiot thinks cowboy boots would be good footwear to pack for a trip to the Amazon. Maybe he thought he was going to Argentina?

"That's such a brilliant reference and I never would have thought of it. Joseph Conrad's book really shows the dark side of Western colonialism as they tried to spread their religion and exploit native peoples, with the reasoning being that native people are inferior. It's Doug Phillips to a tee."

Thanks, JeffR, but I can't take credit for the brilliance of making the connection. I haven't read the book in about 12 years and the story just didn't stick with me. But I was thinking of how colonial DP is in his thinking (colonists who came to Africa and Asia, thinking they were oh-so-superior to the people who already lived there) and thought maybe there's a link to the novel.

And, I'm not insulted by those of you who corrected me about the plot location of the story. I don't take it personally, or anything. No harm, no foul.

watchdog:

The latest "taking dominion" video update:

http://vimeoDOTcom/18622462

And a group photo of the intrepid manly men roughing it. I guess there are 30 of them, two and a half of whom are defrauding me with their bare legs.

You know, if I were a guy I'd always want to keep Dougie in front of me, too!

gingernut:

Dougie's little forays into these types of trips are nauseating yet horribly entertaining at the same time! All of his costumes, the set-up photo shoots, etc., are too fun for words. I about choked when I read earlier all about their air conditioned boat. I had already decided that for the photos of Dougie and Friends hacking through the jungle with machetes, they had just found a friend of a friend (maybe a contact of Geoffrey Botkin) who was the owner of some rubber plantation and let them use his backyard. Go to the overgrowth at the back of the yard, pose with your machete, look all BAD and manly, take a few pictures, then go back up on the verandah and sip some lemonade and talk theology whilst the hired natives fan them with big banana leaves and bring them little dainty finger foods on trays.

watchdog:

Have we seen Dougie dressed as

yet?

Kimerical:

Doug Phillips will always be at the front cause he is a midget. For a man, he is very short. Like, Tom Cruise short.

debrand:

I can't help but wonder what the crew driving the boat think of their passengers.

Lillybee:

I visit a political site, The Raw Story, and lo and behold there was an ad on top for Vision Forum.

Clementinee.freekatie:

[watchdog]

Mama.Junebug.freekatie:

How do you say "I love you!" in Swedish? Because I do!

Now I have 2 things to be forever grateful to you for: one, helping me relocate my old pal in Stockholm -- and two, this!!!!!

CynicMom:

So Dougie is there to explore "environmental pantheism"??? Wtf does that even mean? Searching the amazon for proof that global warming isn't happening? There's jungle here so no jungles are imperiled anywhere in the world? I'd really like to hear his take on this one.

Kimerical:

No. He is there to play hunt the anaconda with some boys.

And mentoring. Lots of men touring. Doug likes men touring.

OnceModestTwiceShy:

Ok thanks I am scarred for life... ;p

Kimerical:

Does anyone else see it??

gustava:

OMG. Dougie is searching for the anaconda. Looooooong, sinuous, roooooooooooundd. How did I miss the imagery?!?!?!?

watchdog:

usedtobenice:

Basically, he's "roughing it" during the day, and is just full of crap. If you are going back to a place with indoor bathrooms and air-conditioning, the only anaconda you're looking for is in the the urinals.

PS, Dougie, quit being rude, keep your eyes on you own!

thoughtful:

treemom:

I wanted to chime in...they are likely not all on the Ayapua. There is a sister boat as well. We were looking at going on the Ayapua this summer until we had to delay our trip.

Also, they aren't even roughing it during the day. They are taking kids...and I was going to take my kid on a very similar itinerary it seems (short climbing the mast in cowboy boots because we are not stupid 'Mericans).

[watchdog]

freemissjinger:

I thought there was something familiar about him LOL! I didnt realize it til you pointed it out though!

thoughtful:

The Doug/Robin Williams similarity gives us yet another nickname for Doug's anaconda -- Mr. Happy!

freemissjinger:

I have to say though... saying Doug looks like Robin Williams is probably an insult to Rob lol.

PBrooke:

Now, if I were really an evil person, I'd take that pic of Dougie and his wife, and use the caption, "My anaconda don't want none." But really, I'm too lazy for that. And, um, not evil. Right.

BarrenDame:

Because I AM evil, I will complete your quote, PBrooke: "My anaconda don't want none, unless you got cock, doc", because it is Doug and his interns, and snarking on him is one of my more earthly pleasures.

*I really did rewrite that song to objectify "big fronts" as an assignment in Gender Studies.

denimjumper:

Mr. Numb-nuts is probably trying to speak to all those people in Brazil in Spanish....

watchdog:

SnarkyJan:

Is that anything like holding the anaconda? Inquiring minds want to know!

watchdog:

If you can stand it, you might want to check out the video episodes. In the first one Dougie opines about "developing manhood."

http://intotheamazonDOTorg/episodes

In the second he preaches a sermon and I thought actually made a good point (it's near the end where he finally clarifies there really is a happy medium of being good stewards of God's creation than only the two extremes of never touching the land and plundering it which is what he seemed to be saying until then), but he could have made the same point in about 2 minutes instead of 22. And why he had to lead an expedition of "intrepid" manly men to the Amazon to make his point I don't know.

If his hands were tied down he couldn't talk. Once he starts he never seems to come up for air. I couldn't help but think what it must be like to be stuck in the Amazon, thousands of miles from civilization, with DP continuously pontificating. That would be the vacation from hell!

HeathenHeart:

You guys, I can't even with this fool anymore. Dougie's little trailer for the "Mystery of the Strange Creatures of the Amazon" (found here: http://www.visionforumDOTcom/news/blogs ... 1/01/9114/ ) is just too ridiculous for words. Rather than emphasize the beauty and significance of some of the unique animals living in the area, he chooses to remind his viewers that many of these creatures are "human-threatening." As if anacondas and freaking fish are going to take over the planet and make us all their slaves.

Actually, I'm sure Dougie is a slave to anacondas... but that's a different story...

[watchdog]

debrand:

I noticed the usage of the phrase, human threatening, also. It made me wonder why he used that particular wording. My only guess is that he wanted to make their experience seem more dangerous and 'manly'.

ladypuglover:

My late grandfather looked a lot like Robin, especially in the mouth and jaw area and both had the same kind eyes. For me, Robin Williams will always be handsome because of my deep love of my grandfather. To put Dougie in the same group is total blasphemy!

Kimerical:

I do apologise

Perhaps because they both have Jewish ancestry?

AthenaC:

I'm going to feminist hell for saying this, but Doug would be cute if he wasn't such a cave-dwelling MCP.

Kimerical:

I think hes adorable. He so cute! Like a perpetual younger brother trying to play grown up. Hes ickle too! About 5'5 iirc.

I think Dougie is adorable

thoughtful:

Robin Williams is of Irish, Welsh, English and French descent, and has always been an Episcopalian. I don't think there is anyone Jewish in his ancestry.

He's just a chameleon!

uber frau:

Because he's a dominionist-ie the entire purpose of the planet is for humankind to exploit and tame it. One of the 'goals' for his Amazonian anaconda hunt was a 'Christian' response to environmentalism.

debrand:

whoops. Somehow I posted the wrong comment to the wrong article.

thoughtful:

i just have to say -- this thread is now 20 pages long, and every time I've looked at the subject, my brain has said "Dougie Phillips Leads 30 "Insipid" Men through the Amazon.

Can't imagine why . . .

watchdog:

The latest:

And the caption is... wait for it..... "Into the Amazon: Searching for Anacondas"

[watchdog]

watchdog:

And this one:

Caption: "Into the Amazon: Doug and Austin Swim with Piranhas"

That's a good way to lose your anacondas, fellas.

watchdog:

Well, it's a month later and Dougie's still milking this thing for all it's worth. The dude on the right in that last one pings in a major way.

AthenaC:

Our right or their right? Or, you know, the "middle" right?

watchdog:

Well, I thought the "middle" one needed no mention. I was referring to the strapping young buck on our right.

AthenaC:

Also, am I really high or is Joshua Titus's head MASSIVE?

watchdog:

His head is massive, the result of the photographer standing too close to the subject(s) while using a wide-angle lens. You know, it must pain Dougie that his sons are taller than he is.

Clementinee.freekatie:

There's so much gayface in VF, the Peruvians most have wondered if the manly sweaty trip was organized by a rainbow travel agency.

HeathenHeart:

I'm not gonna lie. I think JT and homeboy on the right (our right) would make a super cute couple.

[watchdog]

brownbirdie:

Homeboy = Charles Vernier

watchdog:

Oh, I didn't recognize him w/o the hat.

justlurking:

More manly bonding through exercise: http://www.visionforumDOTcom/news/blogs/doug/. I wonder what's up with fundies and their push-up challenges lately.

watchdog:

Almost 9 minutes of ado about nothing...

vimeo.com/19570703

blonde hedonist:In this latest video clip the intrepid insipid men that participated in the journey share about their experience. There are few snark worthy moments that I want to point out.

"Along the way, the focused on the importance of father and son relationships, multi-generational thinking, and the cause of bold manhood in the 21st century. Their hazardous journey brought them face to face with vampire bats, pirahnas, highly inhospitable environments and much more." (taken from Doug's blog grammatical errors and all)

This whole "cause of bold manhood" cracks me up to no end. Dougie doth protest/emphasise too much. Shakespeare please forgive me for bastardizing your quote to make my point . I also fail to see how traveling on a luxury cruise ship with air conditioner, showers,satellite phone, and Internet can be considered hazardous. Their little forays in to the wilds of Amazon forest, caves, or dip in the piranhas infested water don't really warrant the "hazardous" title. I also suspect that if the waters were really that dangerous Doug would not risk his "anaconda" by taking a dip.

They also wax poetics about taking dominion over the Amazon and using it for the betterment of God's people. I wish they would stay the hell away from the Amazon and leave it a wilderness God intended it to be. Another thing I noticed was the incessant bragging of some of these fathers and sons who basically stated "we traveled here, and there, and everywhere". I wonder how an average homeschooling family that is supported by one income and is not a member of an affluent elite feels while listening about the said elite's adventures.

Marian the Librarian:

What. A. Crock.

undermuchgrace:

It's a toss-up. I don't know which is my favorite internet thread of all time. Is it this one or LOLDOUG.

I think that this is all in good fun, and people who don't take themselves too seriously can laugh at this stuff, too. We know that VF does not do that, but, as my husband says, "they beg for abuse." They've been so cruel to anyone who doesn't smell right, they've invited this. They've used what one person once called "photoshopped rosy-cheeked" children to sell their wares and ideas, and it's come full circle. They prostituted their children in the process. I feel sad for them, because they don't have any real choice in the matter. VF has their own paparazzi. (This thread is like TMZ!)

Not that I've been all that innocent myself... There are some zingers listed under humor on my site.

What's really awful and needs no subtitles is the extras on the Return of the Daughters video. Scott Brown sitting there talking about fathers having 13 year old boys as their BFFs (kinda gives new meaning to the acronym). I was waiting for Richard Chamberlain to come out and kiss him full on the mouth. And what he said, out of context from the lecture about procuring a spouse for your daughter, sounded like Oscar Wilde or something off the NAMBLA website.

Well, a merry heart doeth good like a medicine, right? Bill Gothard's favorite pill? Thanks for your good medicine tonight. I needed a laugh!

watchdog:

Oh, noes. VF would never Photoshop photos. Well, maybe once:

http://freejinger.yuku.com/topic/3487

watchdog:

Or twice.

SnarkyJan:

GOT A LITTLE CAPTAIN IN YOU?

[watchdog]

undermuchgrace:

Since a picture is worth a billion blog posts and to save everyone the effort, this is just for you, watchdog!

GolightlyGrrl:

Probably thinking, "I've seen bigger wangs on a hamster!"

AthenaC:

Leads one to wonder if one of the five questions is "Does she give a good handy?"

Or is that considered birth control? :P

(ETA Reminds me of this Onion article... NSFW. http://www.theonion.com/a...r-great-hand-jobs,19356/ )

Marchpane:

Well, they couldn't possibly leave it as it was! She is a queen, conferring knighthood on a warrior. She is of higher rank and the point is emphasised by the fact that she is standing on a higher level and he is kneeling. We can't have women in charge on the cover of a VF book, oh noes!! So they change it to tall knight apparently having his manly bits checked out/fondled by short dainty girl. Well, that's much better then.

Hane.engrishmessageboards:

@Marchpane, the Photoshopped version bothers me so, so much. Such a shockingly blatant non-verbal lie.

Kara:

That's bizarre. I am sure there is lots of romantic/nostalgic artwork that portrays a Sleeping Beaty-esque image. Why photoshop this?

Is it really because they cannot stomach the idea of a woman being at the top of a chain of command?

Marchpane:

Why don't they paint their own pictures if they want to get their twisted message across? Is there not one single solitary SAHD with enough talent to be a propaganda artist for them? In affluent Victorian households, drawing was seen as a very suitable accomplishment for a young lady. You could have swooning, submissive maidens and in-charge, square-jawed heroes produced on demand, instead of resorting to making dubious photo-shopped oddities.

emmiedahl:

It looks like they gave the queen a camisole as well to hide her cleavage.

If the past was the fundie paradise that they claim, it should not be hard to find artwork with the woman in a frumper and bowing before the man. Because we all know that's what they have in mind here.

undermuchgrace:

The mindset and the lifestyle that follows destroy creativity as well as emotional maturity and risk-taking that you need for producing good art like you describe. No generalization or the characteristics of a group are ever true of any individual, so I pray that there are some talented young women out there who will find themselves (or maybe some recovering SAHDs that break loose to find their true identities) through creative self-expression. But, I think that in the especially restricted homes, creativity gets dashed to bits and beaten down with plumbing supply line before the children get to be very old. And I hope many rise up to prove this generalization wrong!

bb:

Unless it's photography, somehow that seems to be an okay hobby.