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Staddon Wedding This Weekend!


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jessica

robertloveskendalyn.com

Someone here recorded Christopher & Anna Maxwell's wedding back in October. Whoever it was, could you record Robert & Kendalyn's for me? I'm going to be visiting family out of state this weekend and won't be able to watch. Pretty please with frumpers on top?

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adirondack

This is my first fundie livestream wedding! I'm so excited that I put it on my calendar months ago. I could record it if someone teaches me how to that

starfish

Oh MamaJunebug, another wedding is amongst us...time for a FJ mission...

watchdog

I'll try to remember to get this one.

Petals

Awesome! So frakking excited. We should discuss as it's going on.

Jencendiary

Should we dress up in our finest floral frumpers and have tea?

Petals

Only if we call it "high tea," in true fundie fashion.

uber frau

I saw a wonderful, embroidered, denim frumper there this morning at the thrift shop this morning. I'll be back tomorrow to pick it up. I'll make a couple batches of cupcakes too. Any requests?

clibbyjo

If I am home I'm in. Its most fun to discuss while its live streaming. I don;t follow this family, but am always up for fundie wedding fashion

.

Jencendiary

I say we need a cheeseake, frau. All the best fundie weddings have one.

I don't follow the Staddons either. Can someone give us a quick primer?

uber frau

They're an ATI family that occasionally catches up with the Duggars. They seem pretty dull actually-just enough crazy to go for the ATI fundydom, not enough crazy to be a spectacular trainwreck a la Zhu Zhu.

Kendalyn's familly is also ATI. She was strongly encouraged by her father to work at one of the IBLP establishments (ALERT, maybe? - I'm just trying to remember off the top of my head here) in the kitchens even though cooking was not something she enjoyed or was good at. The same parent did a similar job of encouragement when it came to encouraging her to court. IIRC, she really wanted to go to college and get some sort of training in the medical/healthcare sector but was basically railroaded into courtship/betrothal by her father. She's grateful now, of course .

Her story is on the robertloveskendalyn site.

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jessica

They are seriously one of the most boring (and homely) families ever and do things like look through their laundry at the "Made in ___" to see how many countries they represent and then call it a fun family game. But they are so very encouraging and such an immense blessing to the rest of us so I have to see the wedding!

They also have a pretty good-looking granola recipe...

MortonFan

Oh my. This is horrific! Thanks, Jessica; you've encouraged me to kill time at work by reading all about dear Kendalyn and Robert!! I am in shock at some of the story ... this especially:

"All through my life, a common thread of lessons have involved obedience to my heavenly Father through my earthly father no matter the cost; this happened when I wanted to get into medical school and my father had a caution so I ended up taking my Home Health degree through correspondence (which was the best training I could have ever received!); then it happened again when I was going to serve in a ministry and ended up having a horseback riding accident in ’06 and my father asked me to fly back home; it occurred when I was in a ministry for a couple years in Chicago in ’06 through ’08 (during which time I met Robert " class="wp-smiley"> ) and Dad called me up three days before I was coming home for a visit and asked me to pack up everything and come home; and again in 2010, which is where the story begins."

Why am I still so shocked by this?? I've been reading fundie blogs for years, but the father-worship never fails to surprise me.

Hopewell

Can't wait.......I'll bring the Kool-aid.....

Hopewell

Seriously? Her MOM is matron of honor?? Interesting......

denimjumper

That poor girl. Brow beaten and broken to submit to her overbearing father's wishes.

Linnea

I'm boggled by the names of Kendalyn's siblings: Aleita, Kerzdenn, and Jevenn.

Hane.engrishmessageb...

If this wedding is going to be like "Anna-Marie" 's, in which we were treated to an interminable and rambling sermon by her soon-to-be hubby, and declamations by both patriarchs as to her second-class-citizenhood, complete with a Transfer of Authority, I think I'll pass.

.

camdendayton

Heart-Shaped Ring!?!? Did anyone else check out the picture of the ring: robertloveskendalyn.com/files/2011/01/IMG_7071-683x1024.jpg

Is it just me or is this super cheesy? But I guess I shouldn't be surprised...

booksnbeats

Is cubic zirconia a fundie thing? I have no idea about that ring but I remember reading about it on some random blogs.

camdendayton

I don't know about the cubic zirconium either but I think that would be perfect! What better way to send the message that I will never put your needs before my own (to be cheep) and that as a woman you should not expect the best things in life.
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Hopewell

Maybe Jim-Bob helped them negotiate the ring purchase at a pawn shop [he's a fan of shopping at them even though its a risk of buying stolen goods] and they were able to "buy used and save the difference...."

watchdog

I was going to ask what time zone it's in but found the details which show the address. I know exactly where the church is. It's in my old stomping grounds! The building looks new, but I used to pass that street every day. What a small world.

Less than 4 hours to liftoff.

clibbyjo

I have to take my son to a sleepover at 4pm,I hope its over by then!

watchdog

Oh, my. The Bible Way Fellowship Baptist Church "demographics" look very... unStaddonish. (Yes, this is the right church.)

Hopewell

Great day to be stuck at work Trooping the Colour in London and The STaddon Wedding!! All live on the web and no one cares that I'm tuning in! [it's allowed when we have down time like Saturday on-call] Love it! Congratuations Mr and Mrs Staddon!!

Generation Cedarchips

Interesting......I don't know if this is true all over the country, but I've been to lots of weddings where the groom's dad is best man, so I think it's kind of cool that finally a bride brings mom up there.

Kathryn31

I was wondering why she registered for 12 vegetable bowls? I can't imagine having twelve 96 ounce bowls. Assuming she thought they were soup/cereal bowls and registered online. Super jealous of her complete All-Clad set.

demgirl

From "Kendalyn's Story" on the website:

ll through my life, a common thread of lessons have involved obedience to my heavenly Father through my earthly father no matter the cost; this happened when I wanted to get into medical school and my father had a caution so I ended up taking my Home Health degree through correspondence (which was the best training I could have ever received!)...

That's one of the saddest things I've ever read. It does not put me in a festive wedding mood. I haven't really followed this courtship, but boy, is her dad a controlling ass, isn't he? No wonder she's willing to marry into the Staddons.

robertloveskendalyn.com/kendalyn/

duplessis3

Do you think Jevann (Or Jeavan) is pronounced a la espanol? I.e. the Huh sound for the J? If so...I sort of love and admire the looniness of it.

twin2

I gots no video! Anyone see anything?

N/m its on

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Petals

Me too! So heartbreaking. Livestream is a little late, but can't wait to start commenting.

Petals

It's on! People are arriving while harp music plays.

chemist1217

Live feed is up! Lovely harp playing. I hope this is as "good" as the Maxwell wedding! I'm sick in bed and could really use some entertainment

fundiefan

It just started seconds ago. Just people filing into church
.

Petals

Why isn't anyone sitting in the front pews?

demgirl

There aren't a ton of people there. Not like the hordes that trooped in to suck up to the Botkins.

chemist1217

Maxwells, take note: THIS is appropriate wedding music. Not your horrible strained voices screaming into microphones

kb

This may be a stupid question but: Is this a CD or are there actual horns in the building?

ETA: ok, going with CD

Last Edited By: kb 06/11/11 11:14:30. Edited 1 times.

theologygeek

They better speed this up. I have chicken frying on the stove.

Petals

This music was about the most triumphant thing I've ever heard. I wish I could see the dress in more detail. The sleeves look very 70's, I wonder if it was her mother's.
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twin2

what the hell is he holding and why

demgirl

Why did her mom walk down the aisle carrying a baby? Also, I can't hear anything.

chemist1217

Bedsores?.....Sheepskin?....WTF About this is about John the Baptist...

.

Hane.engrishmessageb...

WTF with the baby being passed around and the freaking sheepskin?

fundiefan

The words bed sores and wedding really don't belong in the same thought.

Petals

I just hope he doesn't slip up and say "lambskin."

Hane.engrishmessageb...

Oh, wait--it's GOTHARD's freaking sheepskin!

demgirl

If I hold up the computer to my ear, I hear "Sheepskin given by Dr. Gothard".

theologygeek

"He used that sheepskin for his own personal time for prayer." Yeah right. We all know what he did on that sheepskin.

Markie

The wedding dress was her mother's. There's a pic of them washing it in the bathtub on Kendalyn's fb page.
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Petals

LOL

chemist1217

I do NOT understand the sheepskin metaphor. It might be the fever taking over, but I honestly just don't get it. And who is this guy doing the preaching? He is creepy

demgirl

Kendal presenting sheepskin to Robert as they begin their life together. They will kneel on it together to receive communion now, as symbol of "internal cleansing". You can't make this shit up.

Hane.engrishmessageb...

I dunno--I think the triumphant CD music is kind of overblown for such a simple wedding. And--OH! *whispers* Mr. Gothard's not here!

Aaaaaaaaaaaaand here comes the "courtship" and "purity ring" $#!+!

twin2

so this is captn bob's sheepskin. this is weird.

Petals

So, is it a covenant or a contract? I'm not quite clear on that point
.

chemist1217

Mr. Gothard isn't there! Just heard someone whisper it to the big man. Was he supposed to be there?

kb

I would like more detail too, but it looks like the dress has aged very well. It's a nice silhouette.

theologygeek

That's the Sheepskin Of Fun. They're going to get it on, on that sheepskin tonight. Maybe they'll throw all caution to the wind and keep a light on!

demgirl

Oh noes. Covenant talk versus contract talk. This is a covenant, people! Not a contract! I love that these people livestream their weddings like they are fricking Prince William & Princess Catherine (or the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge or whatever they've decided to call themselves these days...)

Kendalyn's dad talking -- Kendalyn @ age 13 made commitment to courtship. "Not an easy decision" -- I bet it wasn't. Court or go to hell.

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kb

Also, I can't see K's face, but R looks super-excited to be getting married.

chemist1217

Ooooo they held hands AND hugged. Scandalous!!

twin2 #63 [-]

oh god a dissertation on courtship and purity gag. ooh great and making a big deal about the kiss. great

Petals

Symbolism symbolism symbolism. Shut up and get married already!

chemist1217

ewwwwww her purity ring is in Robert's ring. That is just GROSS......ugh I hate these kinds of people. Does this woman have any rights of her own? No, now her entire purity is wrapped up in his ring. Nasty. Um.... "woman has an emotional void that needs to be filled every day". This man is a wackadoodle

twin2

ugh he is going to wear her purity

and this guy speaking is a tool

Hane.engrishmessageb...

She melted down the purity ring!

Oh, so I have an "emotional void"? I never noticed.

And, F*CK! The transfer of authority! *hurls*

demgirl

God wired women to have an "emotional void"... you have to fill it every day. It will get emptied every night. Gross.

Petals

Whaaaaa? God "wired a woman with an emotional void?" I've never heard this before. Wacko theology.

chemist1217

The big black man sounds like a really soulful Morgan Freeman. I really like him....despite his clear religiosity, I think he really means what he is saying. No pretenses, unlike Daddy-Kendalyn who is clearly full of himself

Posts through the bottom of page 7/20

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demgirl

The Black preacher isn't so bad. He seems conventional Baptist more than anything. It was the fathers when they were talking that were SUPER creepy. Now Robert announces the song "Trust and Obey". Oy.

Petals

I really do like the dress, it's so unusual! The ruffles cascading down under the satin overlay are gorgeous.

Ewww he's conducting! WTF? How embarrassing.

twin2

he is conduting the audience.

on another note I'm having flashbacks to the maxwells cd.

Hane

The pillar with the flowers on top is wearing a condom.

Oh, and a hymn in honor of the second-class citizen'sbride's "obedience." *vomit*

kb

This song is rousing.

chemist1217

Robert is conducting. He has Nathan Maxwell syndrome. He is also really annoying me. I think I shouldn't be watching this wedding in my sick state. Everything about it is pissing me off. On a happier note, Kendalyn is quite beautiful and she looks nice in her dress.

theologygeek

Robert is beaming because he knows he's gonna get some tonight. Kendalyn, on the other hand, looks shell shocked.

Petals

At least they're not half-singing. Belt it, wedding guests!

demgirl

Oh, good. Group singing. That's what I needed this Saturday. Heh! My cat ran away as soon as the singing started. I will amuse myself by imagining what the preacher was thinking when the dads were talking. In my imagination, it's something like: Oh, hells no. These people are fruitcakes. I will have to close my eyes and think of the paycheck for the church.

watchdog

The feed sucks, fading in and out (it just went black several seconds), the sound is awful, and it won't record but a minute or two and every time you restart it there is an annoying ad first. Then Google ads keep popping up on the window! There's one up right now for "Find Cheap Wedding Venues." And "hair removal." Hope someone else has better luck. Sorry, I tried. Recording live streaming has never been an issue before. I guess they were too cheap to use ad-free live streaming. They should have consulted the Maxwells. Theirs went off without a hitch.

I think there are more people watching online than there are there. I still can't figure out why they chose this church. They suggested motels for guests in Alvin and Manvel which are not anywhere close to the church. I'm not sure, but I think the large black man speaking now is the pastor of that church. "Father, dis is yore weddin'." Argh!

A lesson on sheepskins? Seriously?

Why didn't someone pin the groom's boutonnière on before the bride came down the aisle? The preacher is droning on about sheepskins, and the bride is fiddling with the groom's lapel.

Oh, good Lord. "The woman has been wired by God with an emotional void" that the husband has to fill every day. Here comes the "passing of the authority" crap.

The groom is speaking now. At first I thought it was the bride, but of course she wouldn't be allowed to speak. The groom is directing the singing. This is different.

I don't think Trust and Obey was written with "obey daddy's authority" in mind.

Hane

demgirl wrote:The Black preacher isn't so bad. He seems conventional Baptist more than anything. It was the fathers when they were talking that were SUPER creepy. Now Robert announces the song "Trust and Obey". Oy.

Yeah. I bet I would have liked this wedding a LOT more if they'd left the whole shebang to the black minister.

Robert is going to wash Kendalyn in God's word. Eek.

theologygeek

That Robert sure knows how to party with his lively conducting.

watchdog

demgirl wrote: If I hold up the computer to my ear, I hear "Sheepskin given by Dr. Gothard".

Eeew, is thatwhat he said? Sick

Petals

Uh-oh. Gaydar pinging.

demgirl

Kendalyn does not... look like a glowing bride. I hope she's just shy or tired or something. I worry that what it actually is is that she's realizing she's giving up everything she ever dreamed of to marry this tool. I wish we had a gif of Robert conducting that we could just throw up every time one of the fundie men acts like a self-important ass.

chemist1217

Um, these vows are sad. "love you as myself" "accept you as you are" Why does it sound like he doesn't actually want who she is? Also, his voice is grating on my nerves.

kb

I am very impressed that they memorized their wedding vows. ETA: horrified by what they are, but impressed by the memorization.

demgirl

Vows -- I heard them vow that divorce will never be an option. Didn't hear anything about quivering, but I could have missed it. He's grinning like a fiend, but she seriously just looks stunned.

twin2

"i will never concider divorice as an option" thats a first. why didnt he have to say this
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Hane

Did she just say she wouldn't consider divorce? I don't remember HIM saying that!

chemist1217

Why did she has to promise not to divorce him, but he just had to say that he "Accepted" her as she was. F you Robert Staddon. You are a tool

theologygeek

chemist1217 wrote: F you Robert Staddon. You are a tool

He's probably a bigamist. Or worse. Catholic.

Petals

I don't want to like the pastor, but I do. I like that he doesn't joke around. I can't stand too many jokes at weddings. Properly solemn, nice voice, acknowledges symbolism without overdoing it.

Hane

And that's one intrusive photographer.

kb

I like how the pastor is egalitarian

watchdog

I was waiting for that... "I'm goin' to ax you to repeat after me." Laugh

Yes, that's Dr. Ivory Varner, the pastor.

Ah, geeze. Daddy's pontificating about the husband's headship again.

demgirl

Oh, no! The white men are back to do a blessing! Noooooooooo! Bring back the preacher! Oh, God... the ways that they twist biblical language is ridiculous.

Hane

Re the yakky fathers and groom vs. the minister: This is a case of what my mother used to call "trying to out-holy the priest." How much do you want to bet that the minister is internally rolling his eyes at this?

chemist1217

I really wonder what the Pastor thinks about Daddy's pontificating. I bet he is sitting back there thinking "Get the hell out of my church you self-righteous ass." And, apparently we are comparing marriage and blessings to revving and engine. Metaphors out of control today

twin2

This guy is about as long winded as Steve. Get on with it. I want to see the kiss!

Markie

Oh STFU Daddy!

twin2

Hane wrote: Re the yakky fathers and groom vs. the minister: This is a case of what my mother used to call "trying to out-holy the priest." How much do you want to bet that the minister is internally rolling his eyes at this?

It looked like the minister was going to bust out laughing after their vows. I don't blame him.

theologygeek

Wtf kind of wedding is this? The minister is in the background while the fathers are hogging everything. Get off the damn stage and let the minister lead this thing.

Petals

Groom and Dad of Groom's voices are so high-pitched.

kb

The prayer was for them to have the Character Qualities of the Lord Jesus Christ. Oh. My. God.

twin2

theologygeek wrote: Wtf kind of wedding is this? The minister is in the background while the fathers are hogging everything. Get off the damn stage and let the minister lead this thing.

Yeah, he was doing a good job. But no, the headships need to make it all about them.

chemist1217

Do they actually go to this church or did they just get married here? Blessing children to have "bright countenances" because heaven forbid your grandchildren are ugly! This blessing is going out of control. Please tell me Kendalyn's dad isn't going to speak too

demgirl

Bless their children with "bright countenances"? Bleeeeeargh. Also, why in a blessing do you have to actually lay hands on the person? Is it like God can't tell who you are praying for unless you point him or her out by touching them?

fundiefan

That minister will never allow another white-bread, non-member wedding again. Or, at least I'm sure he's thought that.

Looking at the church website I really wonder why they chose that church.

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Petals

I wonder if they won't get legally married. Too "contract-y?"

fundiefan

Poor minister is asking what's next.

twin2

They have the shittiest photographer. Should have gone with C. Maxwell, he was probably availible.

Petals

I wonder if she really is happy. In her story on the website, she uses the standard courtship story formula, so it's impossible to tell how she really feels. She could be nervous, or just truly not that enthused.

fundiefan

Aren't the photographers their brothers?

watchdog

demgirl wrote: Also, why in a blessing do you have to actually lay hands on the person? Is it like God can't tell who you are praying for unless you point him or her out by touching them?

His mother is probably clutching the back of his jacket to keep him off the bride. Her mother is probably holding her up to keep her from fainting.

Varner: "What's next?" Did they not rehearse this thing? They all seem very disorganized.

Sign the covenant? Isn't that usually done when you get the license and after the ceremony?

chemist1217

Now we are just standing around awkwardly while the photographer shows what happens when you get photography schooling from Bill Gothard

Markie

I think his brother and her brother are both photographers. That interest seemd to run in fundiville!

theologygeek

I've been to birthday parties at Chuck E Cheese that were more fun than this.

demgirl

How do they seriously have less people there than came to my graduation party? Aren't they supposed to be ATI-elite? I kind of hate her dress, I have to say, but it's definitely a look. What I really don't like is her hair. It might just be the crappy feed, but it looks big and messy. Also, she looks sort of hunched over. I just can't get over she looks stoned versus his big shit eating grin.

watchdog

Awkward!

fundiefan

Why are they just standing there?

Jencendiary

Why does her hair look like a hot 60s bouffant mess?

Seriously, one of my aunts has this hair in my mother's wedding photo, circa 1968.

Petals

Wow, this is so awkward. They're just standing there watching the pianist. We're watching them watch the pianist.

theologygeek

Wow, this is so awkward. They're just standing there watching the pianist. We're watching them watch the pianist.

kb

In Texas, you can get a "covenant marriage" by law. They're probably signing the marriage license.

I went to a wedding recently where they signed the license during the ceremony.

watchdog

theologygeek wrote: What in the hell are they just standing there for? See, this is why you need a wedding planner.

Preferably one who didn't attend the Bill Gothard School of Wedding Planning.

chemist1217

O dear.....a cappella singing...Better than the Maxwells, but equally, if not more, awkward

theologygeek

Petals wrote:We're watching them watch the pianist.

LOL!!!

demgirl

Oh, good. More people who think they can sing.

Jencendiary

Who are these people singing a special?

Petals

OMG this singing is hilarious! Reminds me of "You are the love of my life..."

ETA: from Mad TV

twin2

theologygeek wrote: What in the hell are they just standing there for? See, this is why you need a wedding planner.

Now thats a good idea for a sahd waiting for her prince charming, fundie wedding planner!

theologygeek

I hope those two singing are married. His hand is resting a little too low on her back.

Jencendiary

I'm glad it's not just my family then. Somebody gets married, and it's like American Idol -- the auditions.

chemist1217

Who wrote this song? They had to be both deaf and musically inept. And that ending "chord". Yikes. I think my cat almost jumped out of her skin hearing that dissonance.

demgirl

At the last wedding I went to, we were already at the bar by this point. And the bride's family was fundie-lite. (The alcohol was a compromise -- wine and beer, no hard liquor.) Oh, good.. the kiss is almost here!!

theologygeek

Now be fruitful on the sheepskin of fun and multiply!

kb

Jencendiary wrote:I'm glad it's not just my family then. Somebody gets married, and it's like American Idol -- the auditions.

There was singing at my grandfather's funeral that was so bad I laughed. (Quietly.)

twin2

"And this has been an awesome wedding"

And by awesome I mean WTF!

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chemist1217

wow awkward kiss central..........

watchdog

And what fundie wedding would be complete without the crying baby in the audience?

Check.

"This has been an awesome weddin'."

"This has been a awesome presentation."

Amen.

Good grief! The kiss! Get a room!

kb

Man, that wedding party knows how to move quickly.

chemist1217

Now the pastor is thinking about all the stupid rose petals he has to clean up. Did he just say something about Bill Gothard being there?

watchdog

Varner just said Bill Gothard is there and asked someone to ask him to come up and say a word! ]

Jencendiary

kb wrote:

Jencendiary wrote:I'm glad it's not just my family then. Somebody gets married, and it's like American Idol -- the auditions.

There was singing at my grandfather's funeral that was so bad I laughed. (Quietly.)

The organist at my grandmother's funeral decided to get a little 'creative' on us. My mother had to be restrained from grievous bodily harm.

ETA: If any crotchdropping yelled out, "EW!" during my first kiss, I would eat them. I would kill and eat them. Also, did you see that totally smooth nose-bump? Nice job, Robert.

demgirl

She looks happier now. Maybe she was just scared of the kiss. Which I could understand -- he tried to suck her lips off. I can hear the preacher talking about something -- I don't think he realizes the sound is still on. Something about Gothard being there, I think. Even the preacher seems scared/awed by Gothard.

Petals

Did he get her nose during the kiss?

LOL @ the lady asking the minister to announce the refreshments.

theologygeek

Refreshments down the hall??? Where's the roast beef dinner?

chemist1217

O MY!!!!!! Bill Gothard is there and is going to speak to the congregation...but the bride and groom aren't there!
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watchdog

OMG! Bill Gothard IS there. His plane was late.

kb

reception at the church = no booze

twin2

kb wrote: reception at the church = no booze

thats too bad. pastor verner deserves a stiff drink.

why is a guy who has never been married speaking about what marriage is about?

theologygeek

chemist1217 wrote:O MY!!!!!! Bill Gothard is there and is going to speak to the congregation...but the bride and groom aren't there!

They're having sex on the sheepskin of fun.

demgirl

Ah... Gothard's plane was late, which is why he wasn't there to give his message as scheduled in the program. He's speaking now and he's creeeeeeeeeeeeeeepy. The purpose of the marriage is not for the happiness of the couple -- this is the special message he says God gave him for this wedding.

fundiefan

Why are the guests forced to sit and listen to him?

Jencendiary

. . .what is this I don't even.

Hane

Annnnnnnd here comes St. Gothard to piss all over everything.

Oh, and the Ruth and Naomi thing? All about the friendship of TWO WOMEN. I hate how heterosexual weddings have co-opted this.

twin2

theologygeek wrote:

chemist1217 wrote: O MY!!!!!! Bill Gothard is there and is going to speak to the congregation...but the bride and groom aren't there!

They're having sex on the sheepskin of fun.

Somehow "the sheepskin of fun" MUST become part of FJ lingo. I'm crying I'm laughing so hard!

demgirl

fundiefan wrote:Why are the guests forced to sit and listen to him?

Are you kidding? For these people, it's the next best thing to better than having Jesus speak at the wedding.

chemist1217

If marriage isn't for the happiness of the couple, but for heritage....why is gay marriage wrong BIll Gothard?....o wait, he just went on about having children. He is an ass, I can't stand him

I LOVE the pastor. He is adorable!!

fundiefan

Oh, somewhere at 5pm there is a reception and dinner. The guests can hit the bars on the way.

Jencendiary

"You're excused."

YOU'RE EXCUSED?

If any preacher dismissed me like a naughty child in the principal's office, I don't know if I could handle it. I might have to swear in the church house.

demgirl

I'll give Gothard this (and only this): he's speech was short. I vote we collect funds to send Pastor Verner a "Sorry you had to officiate a fundie wedding" fruit basket.

kb

Guys, sometimes, we watch these things. And the whole wedding is like blah blah blah regular wedding blah purity! blah blah. THIS wedding was like, all fundie. Just, the whole thing. That was amazing.

chemist1217

I don't think he meant excused like they had been bad. I think it was his polite way of saying that the freakshow was over and people should leave.

watchdog

You would think after all these years BG could speak for 3 minutes without reading it. "The real purpose of marriage was not their happiness but their heritage." The bible doesn't say "be miserable and multiply."

Varner: "Dis ceremony was put on for God and you guys were jus' eavesdropping."

At least it was shorter than the Maxwell wedding. I really hope they post it online later. That was epic.

fundiefan

Jencendiary wrote:"You're excused."

YOU'RE EXCUSED?

If any preacher dismissed me like a naughty child in the principal's office, I don't know if I could handle it. I might have to swear in the church house.

How could he help it? I'm sure he was swearing silently the whole time and it had to come out eventually. Also, he probably wanted to make it very clear - get the hell outta' my church!

Hane

    demgirl wrote:I'll give Gothard this (and only this): he's speech was short. I vote we collect funds to send Pastor Verner a "Sorry you had to officiate a fundie wedding" fruit basket.


And to listen to what was referred to in "The Color Purple" as "some sorry-sounding whitefolks music."

watchdog

demgirl wrote:

fundiefan wrote: Why are the guests forced to sit and listen to him?

Are you kidding? For these people, it's the next best thing to better than having Jesus speak at the wedding.

Yeah, at the reception Jesus might have turned the punch into wine.

theologygeek

twin2 wrote:

theologygeek wrote:

chemist1217 wrote: O MY!!!!!! Bill Gothard is there and is going to speak to the congregation...but the bride and groom aren't there!

They're having sex on the sheepskin of fun.

Somehow "the sheepskin of fun" MUST become part of FJ lingo. I'm crying I'm laughing so hard!

I just made it up. lol

watchdog

demgirl wrote: I'll give Gothard this (and only this): he's speech was short. I vote we collect funds to send Pastor Verner a "Sorry you had to officiate a fundie wedding" fruit basket.

Mmmm... I don't know. He seemed awfully excited that Bill Gothard was there. He said something about not letting everyone get away without letting BG speak.

Daddy Staddon (I think) said something about Pastor Varner's sermon last week.

Do the Staddons or Kendalyn's family live in the Houston area? I'm still trying to figure out the connection to a small, all-black church in southeast Houston.

Hane

I also wonder why they chose this church. I bet it's because there are no ordained ministers in either family, and this particular church was the closest to the conservative theology of the two "patriarchs."

I can only imagine how my dad would have reacted if I'd informed him that I wanted to do the courtship thing and have him pick out a husband for me. He'd be sitting there all white-faced, going "HUH?????

demgirl

I think he was afraid of offending the big man... just a guess. His parts of wedding were entirely without fundie catch phrases.

I have no idea what the connection is... Kendalyn and her family are from Canada.

watchdog

Kendalyn: All through my life, a common thread of lessons have involved obedience to my heavenly Father through my earthly father no matter the cost; this happened when I wanted to get into medical school and my father had a caution so I ended up taking my Home Health degree through correspondence (which was the best training I could have ever received!); then it happened again when I was going to serve in a ministry and ended up having a horseback riding accident in ’06 and my father asked me to fly back home; it occurred when I was in a ministry for a couple years in Chicago in ’06 through ’08 (during which time I met Robert ) and Dad called me up three days before I was coming home for a visit and asked me to pack up everything and come home; and again in 2010, which is where the story begins.

This is just so sad. Poor girl has had the life sucked out of her. If these decisions had been hers and hers alone that would be different, but her "daddy authority" did her thinking for her. It's also sad that was one long, run-on sentence.

kb

The families seemed very excited about Gothard being there, and I bet Pastor Varner picked up on that. It seemed more like, "we have this great man (Gothard) in our presence, it would be disrespectful to not let him speak," rather than, "oh, this guy has great advice, we'd love to hear what he had to say."

demgirl

Perusing the churches website -- oh noes! I see women in pants and GASP! jeans! And ACK! They have Sunday school!

I mean... they're evangelical born-again conservative Baptists. I would disagree with them on 90% of religious ideas, and 80% of life ideas and they have some fairly fundie ideas. See, the Pastor's Corner: https://www.bibleway1.org.../PageID/1808/index.html.

But I think they were essentially picked because the pastor's sermons are live streamed on a regular basis and that made live streaming the wedding easy.

watchdog

Could be. Lots of churches do live streaming or at least post their audio archives, but I've never seen one resort to Ustream. Hair removal ads tend to distract from a church service.

They're Southern Baptist. I wouldn't have predicted that.

clibbyjo

I missed it!! Damn kids and their hockey games and sleepovers, don;t they know I have fundie weddings to watch on livestream? :/
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luv2laugh

Does anyone have any videos where we could watch the Wedding if we missed it?

ruthey

http://www.ustream.tv/user/robertstaddon/videos

It was a beautiful wedding, enjoy.

watchdog

I tried to record it, but it wouldn't work. It would record about a minute before stopping, and when you refreshed the page you had to wait for a commercial to play, and then it would record another minute or two before stopping. I tried it with two video capture programs. Must be something about Ustream as I've never had trouble recording live streaming videos before. I don't know if it was the continuous Google ads or what, but it was an epic fail.

I hold out hope that they'll put it up later as the bride's brother and SIL did with their wedding video. It's definitely worth an hour of your time if they do. And Bill Gothard making an appearance at the end just added to the awesomeness of the day.

www.kerzdennlovesjessicaDOTcom

"Kerzdenn Loves Jessica" ... "Robert Loves Kendalyn"

There seems to be a theme. BTW, this one wasn't as snark-worthy as today's nuptials. There were a couple of moments though... at about 52:30 where the bride sings to her beloved (touching but she's a bit tone deaf) and a few minutes later when the preacher loses his place during the exchange of vows. Of course, there were the requisite "he promises to love, honor, and cherish" and "she promises to love, honor, and obey" parts.

ruthey wrote: http://www.ustream.tv/user/robertstaddon/videos

It was a beautiful wedding, enjoy.

We cross posted. Thank you!

ruthey

No worries. It was put up not long before I posted.

Hane

Warning to all who plan to watch Kerzdenn Loves Jessica: Skip the first 30 minutes, which is an interminable-seeming sermon. They also pass the collection plate, which I think is odd at a wedding (of course, this one may have taken place during a typical Sunday service).

And then there's the Purity Ring, with Daddy's mandatory speech! Thank God, though, he hands the ring back to her, without even a mention of her giving it to her husband.

Now I know what it meant when, in another fundie wedding (was it an Anderson one?), it was considered a big deal when the bride and groom "dismissed the congregation row by row": it just seemed to be a version of the receiving line, in which the new couple exchanged hugs/kisses/handshakes with the guests and received their congratulations.

From now on, whenever anyone complains about the typical hour-long Catholic nuptial Mass, I will cite this one and say that nobody had to sit there and listed to a minister blather on for over half an hour.

clibbyjo

I just skipped through most of it, what was up with Robert directing the singing(his hand flailing about like a weirdo ) while holding the brides hand? Nice first kiss, take her face off next time . Chruch looked pretty empty.

theologygeek

This thread was more fun than the actual wedding. I laughed so hard yesterday.

browngrl

ruthey wrote:http://www.ustream.tv/user/robertstaddon/videos

It was a beautiful wedding, enjoy.

thanks for the link

thatonechick

clibbyjo wrote:I just skipped through most of it, what was up with Robert directing the singing(his hand flailing about like a weirdo ) while holding the brides hand? Nice first kiss, take her face off next time . Chruch looked pretty empty.

bwahahahaha!

Friggin' blackberry smoothie up the nose.

jessica

Wow. I went to watch it, got 2 minutes in, someone came into the room so I closed it out and 10 minutes later went back to watch it and the video is now private.

gibbsgirls

jessica wrote: Wow. I went to watch it, got 2 minutes in, someone came into the room so I closed it out and 10 minutes later went back to watch it and the video is now private.

Me too! I had to check on something cooking and now it's private. I did get to see the wedding though. Gothard was just getting ready to speak when I had to pause it. I soooooo wanted to see him. Wanted to make sure he was as creepy as I remember.

fundiefan

I watched it - or, had it streaming, at least, like the tv in the background, while I did other things. It was nothing special. Even as a fundie wedding, it was boring, had zero emotion and after the sheepskin thing didn't even have much to snark on. Well, ok, the purity ring thing was just plain wrong and I can't even comprehend it so I discount it.

Of course, Bill Gothard was late so they had to improvise and there were long, awkward moments. But, overall, it was boring and limited. The biggest attraction was the Church's actual minister.

So, the video is now private? How the hell can they reach others when they do that? How can they show the world what a wedding should be?

wildflower

fundiefan wrote:I watched it - or, had it streaming, at least, like the tv in the background, while I did other things. It was nothing special. Even as a fundie wedding, it was boring, had zero emotion and after the sheepskin thing didn't even have much to snark on. Well, ok, the purity ring thing was just plain wrong and I can't even comprehend it so I discount it.

Of course, Bill Gothard was late so they had to improvise and there were long, awkward moments. But, overall, it was boring and limited. The biggest attraction was the Church's actual minister.

So, the video is now private? How the hell can they reach others when they do that? How can they show the world what a wedding should be?

It's private now? Well, bummer. Guess I can't get saved and plan an awesome fundie wedding now...

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Wedding video is now up!

http://www.veoh.com/watch/v21047290tk8znWZg

Also, if you missed it, the Maxwell-Hamilton wedding:

http://www.veoh.com/watch/v20537373bNjtddZ8

You must install the Veoh Web Player to watch these videos. I've not found it to cause any problems. It's not malware and you shouldn't even know it's installed. However, unless you want an annoying toolbar and other junk installed (nothing evil, just annoying), choose the CUSTOM installation option and UNCHECK everything. That way all you'll get is the Veoh player. You can always uninstall it after watching the video(s).

Sound and picture quality aren't the best.

Loved the stage whispers between the bride's father and the preacher at the 17:45 mark.

Dad: "Mr. Gothard's not here."

Preacher: "What?"

Dad: "Mr. Gothard's NOT HERE!"

Preacher: "Don't worry about it." :lol:

Gothard finally appeared at the end.

During the vows at 33:35...

Preacher: "With this ring... "

Robert: "With this ring... "

Preacher: "I thee wed... "

Robert: "I thee wed... "

Preacher: "And all my worldly goods... "

Robert: "And all my worldly goods... "

Preacher: "I thee endow... "

Robert: :?:

Preacher: "I thee endow."

Robert: "I thee endow."

Preacher: "It's Old English. In sickness and in health... "

Blah, blah, blah.

Since the link in my old comment didn't get transferred here, this is the church's website:

http://www.bibleway1DOTorg

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