Rubio: Zika-infected women have no right to abortion

[notfundy]

My personal feelings on abortion? It's a personal choice that should be used rarely.   Birth control = good.  Abortion - not so much.  But it should be safe and available for women who need it.  

As evidenced by another difficult thread we've been talking about here (Abortion at 32 weeks) NO ONE - and I mean NO ONE - can understand what a woman (and her partner) may go through when it comes to these decisions.  They are personal decisions.  They are profoundly difficult.  

Oh - but Marco Rubio gets to decide? EVEN FOR A WOMAN INFECTED BY THE ZIKA VIRUS WHO IS CARRYING A SEVERELY DISABLED FETUS?   SERIOUSLY?  MARCO GETS TO DECIDE?????

http://thehill.com/blogs/blog-briefing-room/news/290676-rubio-zika-infected-women-shouldnt-have-right-to-abortions

 

So now I am going to share something that only my husband knows.  Not even my grown daughter knows. None of my friends know.  I have never ever ever talked about it to anyone.  For years I have been deeply ashamed, but no more.

I am trying to get the courage to "come out" about this, since I think it would help people to understand the reproductive rights issue if more women talked about it openly. When I read statistics such as "almost 30% of American women have had abortions" I can hardly believe it, since NONE of my friends admit to having had an abortion, although the odds are some of them have.  About a year ago, Lena Dunham and a group of her friends tried to get their mothers to talk about their (he mothers') abortions on twitter.  Hashtag #MyAbortion  I think it was.  It didn't go well.  The hatred and vitriol directed at those women who spoke up seemed to outweigh the benefits of doing so, at least that is how I recall it.  I was SOOOO tempted to speak out then but I didn't.  

 So - I have had an abortion; it was decades ago in the early eighties, not long after abortion was first legal.   

I was a young widow  (very young, 26).   My medical student husband had just committed suicide.  I had a baby girl  (she had just turned a year old) and an almost-four year old son.  We/now "I" was BROKE. As in, "not always enough money for food" broke.    As in "YesIWasWorkingFullTimeButStillNotEnoughMoney" broke.  So a few weeks after he died, I found out I was pregnant.   ARE YOU FRICKIN' KIDDING ME?  SERIOUSLY, UNIVERSE?  ARE YOU KIDDING ME?   And I have to say this - our marriage at the end was not a good one.  He cheated, he was verbally and sometimes physically abusive.  NO ONE would have believed those things about him, he was charming and wonderful.  Yes much of the time he was that to me, too.  And he was always "good to the kids".   He was also bipolar and seriously depressed at the time he took his life.  And I tried very hard to get him to seek help, but no - "too much stigma for a medical student", he said.  So, no. 

So anyway, there was no way on earth I could see myself raising a third child, alone.  I was grieving.   I was out of my mind.  There was just no way.  My folks lived out of town.  His folks were... crazy.  Oh and they blamed me for their son's suicide, so there was that.  

There was no way this pregnancy was happening.    So I enlisted the help of one girlfriend.. someone I didn't know that well, actually (too much shame to ask my "real" friends to go with me).   I found a clinic (at that time, there were plentiful options in my large-ish city.  And no protesters outside. Imagine that.   I went, I paid my money, I picked up my other two kids from daycare that day, and went home alone.

So - OK - Marco Rubio.  Wanna judge me?  Go right fucking ahead.  

[RoseWilder]

@notfundy: I'm so sorry for what you went through. And thank you for trusting us enough to share your story. I'm so proud of you and all the other women who are speaking out against the anti-abortion people's attempts to judge and stereotype people who have abortions. I've never understood why people like Rubio have so much trouble having empathy for people who are in difficult situations. 

When I read Rubio's statement, first I was shocked and disgusted. And then immediately after that, I thought "I hope this ends the same way for Rubio that it did for all those politicians who kept talking about legitimate rape in 2012." 

[RosyDaisy]

@notfundy I'm sorry fowhat you had to go through. Your body, your choice...the way it should be. Rubio can go fuck himself.

[Toothfairy]

Rubio Florida is dumb as fuck. Sorry Floridians. Rubio go fix the foster care system. Pass bills that help the poor. Why won't you give up your income to help Zika babies? Fuck you Rubio. I'm sorry notfundy. 

[Howl]

@notfundy, hugs across the ethernet.  

Marco Rubio is an ass.  He could think this to himself, but because he's a politician, he has to get traction from an agonizing decision that is an intensely private one.  And yes, there is zip compassion or empathy.  Plus, he's a guy getting all up in a woman's business.  Butt out, Marco. 

Is he working hard for universal access to free birth control?  Is he working hard for women's health issues?  Is he working hard to get funding to halt  the spread of Zika, including funding research for promising approaches?  Hmmmm (scratches head), I didn't think so.  

Oh, and I love it that the guy who plays Luke Healy on Brain Dead (TV series) looks remarkably like a slightly disheveled Marco Rubio. 

ETA that apprently Rubio is working to get funding for Zika. Makes sense, I guess, since Florida is ground zero for Zika in the US. 

 

 

[VelociRapture]

@notfundyI am so sorry you had to go through all that. I am, however, incredibly honored you chose to share you story with us. You seem like a very brave and thoughtful person to have dealt with all that with such grace.

As for Rubio, I recently gave him credit for saying Zika funding shouldn't be a political issue. He was strongly urging his fellow Republicans to act like adults and agree with the President's proposal. It was refreshing to see a Republican put their constituents before politics for once. 

Now? He can go fuck himself.  Hard. In the ass. With a broken broom handle. That I personally set on fire.

[AmazonGrace]

So what is he doing to help the families pay their hospital bills and all the special care that the babies will need if they survive?

For instance, there's a baby in this story that needs a feeding tube.

http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/brazil-zika-babies-microcephaly-families-1.3707363

Will Rubio do something to help the families pay for the surgery if they can't afford it?`

Or is it okay to let the babies die once they're born?

[formergothardite]

2 minutes ago, AmazonGrace said:

Or is it okay to let the babies die once they're born?

Those babies need to pull themselves up by their bootstraps, don't you know.  It is very clear that most of the so called "pro-life" movement is really only pro-fetus. If they were actually pro-life, the main focus wouldn't be abortion, but helping all the people who are already born. 

[Cartmann99]

1 hour ago, AmazonGrace said:

So what is he doing to help the families pay their hospital bills and all the special care that the babies will need if they survive?

For instance, there's a baby in this story that needs a feeding tube.

http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/brazil-zika-babies-microcephaly-families-1.3707363

Will Rubio do something to help the families pay for the surgery if they can't afford it?`

Or is it okay to let the babies die once they're born?

Rubio will help pass a bill that loosens child labor laws so that babies with Zika can get off their lazy duffs and know the dignity of work. 

[GreyhoundFan]

@notfundy -- Thank you for sharing your story. I'm sorry you were put in such a tough situation.

Personally, I don't know if I could do it, but I've never been pregnant and in a bad situation, so I will not berate others for their choices.

In high school, a friend of mine got pregnant. This was in the early 80s. She had some physical challenges and her parents were not nice people. I could picture them beating her severely before throwing her out (she was only 15). She came to me for help, and I took her to the local clinic, sat with her through the abortion, and had her come spend the night at my house so she could have a quiet night to get herself together. If she had tried to go through with the pregnancy, she would have been homeless, penniless, physically ill, and ill-prepared for motherhood. The father of the baby was not a responsible sort. That child would likely have been ill, malnourished, and had pretty much every strike against him or her from day one. The best thing that came out of the situation is that she understood the importance of birth control and subsequently took responsibility for BC going forward. My mother is extremely anti-abortion and to this day doesn't know I helped my friend. I'm sure it would upset her terribly, but I don't feel bad. It was the right thing to do in that situation.

Rubio is an ass. I've heard several people say he would have been more palatable than Trump, but I think he would have been a dangerous choice. He smiles pretty and spews hatred. I agree with the others here who pointed out that he wouldn't care about the baby after it was born. He wouldn't care that the family was bankrupted by medical bills for the Zika-infected child.

[RoseWilder]

Rubio is slipping in the polls: http://www.politico.com/states/florida/story/2016/08/florida-poll-hurt-by-trump-rubio-in-too-close-to-call-us-senate-race-with-murphy-104657

Quote

Rubio has a marginal 3-point lead over Murphy, 48 percent to 45 percent, in the latest poll of likely voters. However, last month’s Quinnipiac poll showed Rubio ahead by 13 points, 50 percent to 37 percent. Factoring in the new poll's 3-point error-margin, the Senate race is now "too close to call," Quinnipiac said in a news release.

I can't find anything in the article that tells when this poll was conducted, so I don't know if it was before or after Rubio made the comments about abortion and Zika. But either way, he's not doing well and that makes me really happy. 

[samira_catlover]

I wish to the dear blessed heaven that every fetus was healthy, well-loved and/or promised to a wonderful home, and that every woman who got Unexpectedly Pregnant either wanted to carry to term and/or had the resources to raise a child.

Unfortunately, for a whole bunch of reasons, this is not likely to happen.

For every woman who has made a choice: my honest thoughts and best wishes are with you. May you have strength and comfort in your choosings, healing for the heart as necessary, and gazillions of support.

Ideally, abortion should be rare---BUT ALWAYS SAFE, AND AVAILABLE ON DEMAND, WITHOUT APOLOGY!, or needing a signoff by some damned male. Let's have universal free birth control, if you want to reduce elective abortion---and for those who are not OK with ending a pregnancy for whatever reason (and it IS a big personal choice), we need MAJOR medical and childcare supports!

I'm wondering if the majority of Americans who are sorta-kinda OK with late-term abortion (say, 20+ weeks) are so charitable when there is a case of late-discovered/confirmed anencephaly, or Tay-Sachs, or any other condition "incompatible with life", but which may not be discovered till 18+ weeks or so.  Do those poor women get to carry to term and deliver a neonate who is literally "born dying"?

[FloraKitty35]

Marco Rubio and his combover can go fuck off.  

 

 

[smittykins]

@notfundy, I realize I'm very late on this, but thank you for sharing your story, and I hope you and your family are in a better situation now.

[amazing707]

I have had 2 abortions by choice, and a medical necessary one. The Medically necessary one was for a ectopic/tubal pregnancy that ruptured and I was dying.  The 2 by choice were actually the same pregnancy  I did an abortion by pills and it failed so about 3 weeks after that I had surgical abortion. I had an abortion cause I didn't want another child at the time, we were too poor and barely able  to   afford the 2 we had. I'll even be honest and say we weren't being completely safe and weren't a BC failure we were just stupid. I don't think abortions are wrong for any reason so I have no issues with it. I now have the implant in my arm and love it.

[Childless]

Why is it that men, who don't have to deal with the consequences of an unwanted/troubled pregnancy, think they should have a say in the legality or availability of abortions?  Shut the fuck up unless you have a uterus and said unwanted/troubled pregnancy is in it.  No one cares about your opinion or wants your advice you controlling misogynistic wanker!

[smittykins]

Who was it that said "If men got pregnant, abortion would be a sacrament"?

[amazing707]

8 hours ago, smittykins said:

Who was it that said "If men got pregnant, abortion would be a sacrament"?

If men got pregnant you could buy abortion pills out of vending machines in front of any store or pharmacy.