And remind me that I am nothing if not pragmatic. Idk who this optimist is who is currently inhabiting my body, but if someone knows how to drive her out so I can get my cynical little soul back I'd appreciate it.
(this isn't about the interview. The job sounded even worse than in the ad, which was pretty bad already and I'm always a good interview when I give zero fucks.)
So later that day, after my pleasant but useless helping a lovely woman hone her interview techniques and a drive into work awash in the relief of having dodged a horrific future* I got a call from a contact about a job. He wasn't sure I'd be interested but tossed it out there that someone called him desperately looking for someone to do this thing with some software. (He's not a recruiter - this is just an industry back channel conversation thing.)
Well, this thing that they need someone to do? It's my wheelhouse. It's the center of my wheelhouse. It's where I live.
You know how everyone has that one thing where you knock it out of the park like a boss? That if you had to chose one segment of your job to prove ultimate competence and show how you are at the very top of your game you'd pick that thing? That if the multiverse theory is correct and there are an infinite number of us existing in parrallel spheres they all kick ass at this one thing? if it were an Olympic event you'd be Michael Phelps of that thing?
This is my that thing.
I do NOT get my hopes up. I hope for the best but prepare for the worse. Better to be surprised than disappointed. I'm a bit of a cynic like Trump is a bit of a douche. Understatement of the year.
Even if I wasn't actively looking I'd leave a job where I was happy for an opportunity like this. Even if it were a pay cut and a longer commute. (But it is so neither of those things.)
So he's going to put us in touch. This was late Friday afternoon and even though I know it's ridiculous to expect any kind of response before Monday at the earliest I'm afraid to check email due to the crushing disappointment that I know is awaiting me there in the absensce of an email from owner of awesome opportunity place.
This is so ooc for me, I can't even explain it.
And yes, more than anyone I know there is no dream job and it will have annoyances and idiots and all kind of imperfect but as long as the checks clear and no one is punching me in the face want all of that.
The face punching is even negotiable.
My fear is that they've found someone since he spoke to my contact about this a few weeks ago. If I can just talk to the guy I'm sure I'd have a shot.
I'm not arrogant - plenty of things where I'm adequate and competent but no ones rock star ...plenty of room for improvement in some areas but when it comes to this thing ....I'm sure there are people better than I but it would be a very small subset. And its a niche software so SMEs aren't littering the landscape and my reputation with the vendor is not insignificant. They have a huge need to get this thing done and I have a tremendous need to do this thing...it really would be win-win. I'd make more money while saving them money by trying to do this thing without an SME.
I'm going to drive past the place today...for luck.
When this amounts to nothing, which is likely, I will not be in a good place. Need to get my perspective back fast.