@sisterwives I was disappointed in myself as well for the casual use of the word. But I honestly had no clue. After reading that article I just posted I feel better informed.

It was sexist on my part, thank you. Misogynistic means "hatred or dislike of girls". Sexism can be linked to all sorts of accidental, and casual, misinterpretations of things. It doesn't help when I see "domestic goddess" being used, as a cute term, by women themselves. It confuses.

5 minutes ago, THERetroGamerNY said:

@sisterwives I was disappointed in myself as well for the casual use of the word. But I honestly had no clue. After reading that article I just posted I feel better informed.

It was sexist on my part, thank you. Misogynistic means "hatred or dislike of girls". Sexism can be linked to all sorts of accidental, and casual, misinterpretations of things. It doesn't help when I see "domestic goddess" being used, as a cute term, by women themselves. It confuses.

To be honest I see no difference between sexist and misogynistic. People just like to use sexist because it spares men's feelings. Personally, I think you're a misogynist, regardless of whether you had a "clue" or not. And I think its foolish and misguided of you to say that you were "sexist" because you "don't hate girls." Speaking condescendingly to a group of women you are arguing with doesn't paint you in a favorable light.

@sisterwives @THERetroGamerNY - could you please take this to the community thread if you feel the need to continue?  

I think they are allowed to continue the discussion where ever they wish.

She ended it, in my view, when she refused to accept the honesty of my dumb mistake. That isn't discussion, it's something else.

8 minutes ago, THERetroGamerNY said:

She ended it, in my view, when she refused to accept the honesty of my dumb mistake. That isn't discussion, it's something else.

Excuse me? What exactly are you trying to accuse me of? No I'm not going to accept the "honesty" (which I doubt) of your stupid mistake because you're a grown man and should know better, just like you should know better than to insult women period. Quit playing dumb and be straight up about what you're saying instead of skirting around the issue.

I contemplated posting this here but decided wtf maybe we need this. Feel free to join in as to why having been born with a penis would be good.

To damn right I have penis envy. Let me tell you some of the reasons why I would love to have been born with a penis:

Peeing

I could just whip it out to pee. No need to get half undressed and go squatting.

Peeing would be cheaper. Where I live now there are public urinals. They are free to use. Women's toilets? ha, that is a joke right? because you know I actually have to pay to use a toilet here. Yeah, it costs me but not the guys. Or I must buy a drink somewhere and hope they don't get shitty at me because I only got my drink to use their toilet (because sometimes they do. it is weird).

Peeing would take less time. Ever stood at the airport waiting in line to go to the toilet? You see about 20 guys go in and out before the first female reappears. I don't know why that is, but damn that would be nice.

Great old aunt flo

If I was born without a penis I wouldn't have personally encountered that damn aunt. That damn aunt is annoying as hell

I wouldn't have fainted at school when that aunt made an unexpected appearance. More than once. It is no fun trying to get to the sickbay having to walk up and down flights of concrete stairs when you vision has reduced to 2d black and white fuzz.

I wouldn't have been bullied because one day the aunt came unexpected, fast and hard and i ended up leaving a bit puddle of blood on the seat. I had no clue, couldn't avoid it. but man did that bullying stab my heart into little shreds

no cramps, no vomiting, no having to spend shitloads on sanitary products over the years, or on contraceptives.

Work

i would have been paid more, on average for what I have done so far if I could whip out that penis. Maybe I should consider a strap-on, do you think that would work?

That time I had a nice 'discussion' with someone about 7 levels of management higher, I probably would have obtained answers. and those answers would have probably been more truthful than the shit I was fed. I called that manager guy out on his lies while my direct manager and her manager gaped at me. Afterwards they said they hadn't expected a girl such as myself to say such things.

No one would have told me "even a girl can go into engineering" and then express disappointment that I didn't want to be that 'token girl' doing it. It wasn't because I didn't want to be a token, it was because I didn't want to do engineering. Apparently because I was an intelligent girl I was meant to do it to prove girls could. That person isn't me. If I was a guy my choice to take a different career path wouldn't have been so condescendingly questioned. How do I know? well the guys who academically ranked at the same level as me didn't get it. one little bit.

And that is just a little bit of why I envy penis holders. Yes I wish I was born with one. My bf is glad I wasn't. Having penis envy doesn't make me hate guys; I don't really care about their status to be honest, it's mine that matters.

I just wanted to add I think that Trump's claim about his size is about as reliable as his claim about how good a business man he is.

@OnceUponATime I just use the men's room. They are too scared to tell me to stay out. No lie.

@nelliebelle1197 I've haven't yet seen a men's room where the urinals are not placed in a weird area way too close to the door. After having to clean the men's toilet and urinals at church every few months growing up, those things freak me out (also how hard is it to aim well?) I'm meaning ones like in the photo but ceramic. They never flushed them. Church on Sunday, cleaning Saturday. Yeah It wasn't fun...

I can't keep track of who is ignoring who and I am not quoting but I am going to reference the fact that gamer has already received and acknowledged this lecture on goddess and its appropriateness last night. So can we at least go find it there again?

Also, its easier to track the conversation not on someone's blog post.

26 minutes ago, nelliebelle1197 said:

@OnceUponATime I just use the men's room. They are too scared to tell me to stay out. No lie.

I have been kicked out of a bar for doing that.

10 minutes ago, AliceInFundyland said:

I can't keep track of who is ignoring who and I am not quoting but I am going to reference the fact that gamer has already received and acknowledged this lecture on goddess and its appropriateness last night. So can we at least go find it there again?

Also, its easier to track the conversation not on someone's blog post.

I'm not asking you to keep track of anything and I'll discuss this where I please, thanks. Especially since he's the one who asked and I gave my opinion. I'm now more agitated by his indirect accusation towards me, which is childish and passive aggressive. If someone is going to accuse me of something publicly like he just did, I'm going to respond to it and I'll do it where he did it, on a public post. Why isn't he being scolded?

1 minute ago, sisterwives said:

I'm not asking you to keep track of anything and I'll discuss this where I please, thanks. Especially since he's the one who asked and I gave my opinion. I'm now more agitated by his indirect accusation towards me, which is childish and passive aggressive. If someone is going to accuse me of something publicly like he just did, I'm going to respond to it and I'll do it where he did it, on a public post. Why isn't he being scolded?

that was rude. I don't have the energy to explain to you why you are the only one scolding him.

2 minutes ago, AliceInFundyland said:

that was rude. I don't have the energy to explain to you why you are the only one scolding him.

Yeah it was pretty rude but I think TRGNY has been rude for the past several hours. I'm going to respond to his inflammatory comments and I shouldn't be scolded for that. If you don't have the energy to explain your position, why post at all? If you're going to scold me for responding to his stupid accusation, scold him as well for making it in the first place.

Man this place is all messed up.

6 minutes ago, sisterwives said:

Why isn't he being scolded?

because he has been. because everyone is sick and tired of the bullshit. If you have an issue with him put him on ignore, problem solved. This issue is/has been mentioned in two places.

A long time ago (it is in the archives, I don't have the energy to search for it right now) someone pointed out how stupid/silly it was to be arguing about petty things in a public forum (blog posts are public, AYTFJ and Community forum aren't) when we know the ones we snark on (fundies) do read here. We are collectively making ourselves look fools. Can we please just stop it.

And I just deleted and retyped this message 3 times because I'm f'n sick of how people can't just stop. I mean seriously. In order to join FJ everyone claimed they were over the age of 18 (ToU). Please can we collectively start acting it.

Fine, I don't know how much attention you've paid to this forum in the last week. Retrogamer has been in the middle of a huge shit storm (Melissa of green gables thread then can we please slow our roll) plus some things in aytfj. The consensus by mods was that he is not going to be trashed about what he did publicly. (this is really condensed) So now we have landed on this new posters blog post to continue a debate that many of us have very heated feelings about still and are uncomfortable speaking about. I don't know whether daffodil cares or not but that's the only reason we suggested moving it-and it is actually easier for me anyway when not on a blog. I have been actively engaged in the whole damn thing and so yeah that's why I'm bothering to post at all. To try and calm shit down before it flares , because as you aptly noted "this place is all messed up right now"

21 minutes ago, sisterwives said:

 Why isn't he being scolded?

As has been alluded to already, several of us explained to him last night after his convo here with @church_of_dog about appropriate uses of the word goddess. Maybe that should have happened here, but it didn't. It's in the spec thread if you want to look. Please at least look there, before you come back here and bitch him out for something that's been addressed. 

@AliceInFundyland The mods did not say he cannot be taken to task when he angers someone. This is not the same subject and this is coming from someone I believe had zero participation in the kerfuffle. You guys are bringing the kerfuffle here. SW responded to something he said and continued to respond in a clear way until others jumped in. Just because you are reading all about this does not mean this poster is - I have honestly never noticed her before today.

Gamer is not immune from the same treatment everyone else gets unless there is something new in the rules no one told me.

also I was Not scolding you and I really hope the rest of you would know that by now. I could have been more elaborate but I was just doing what I've done all week which was attempting to point out places where things had previously been discussed. Redundancy gets to me.Sorry if that one came off a bit tense.But not once have i told anyone to actively tell anyone to stop. I'm not a mod. Not trying to be.

8 minutes ago, daisyd681 said:

As has been alluded to already, several of us explained to him last night after his convo here with @church_of_dog about appropriate uses of the word goddess. Maybe that should have happened here, but it didn't. It's in the spec thread if you want to look. Please at least look there, before you come back here and bitch him out for something that's been addressed. 

How the heck is she supposed to know it has been addressed? And because YOU addressed it does not give you the right to tell someone they cannot address it.

Maybe it would have been more appropriate to address it where it happened so the 6000 or members who don't go to that part of the board would know.

These comments are actually making things worse and are actually just the kind of thing that is dragging this mess out.

47 minutes ago, AliceInFundyland said:

I can't keep track of who is ignoring who and I am not quoting but I am going to reference the fact that gamer has already received and acknowledged this lecture on goddess and its appropriateness last night. So can we at least go find it there again?

Also, its easier to track the conversation not on someone's blog post.

That's how she would know it's been addressed. Maybe not the most diplomatic way to say it, but she was informed. It's also why I told her exactly where to look do she can see for herself. 

Nellie I see your point. Too tired for more but I do.

Fucking edit isn't working now.

I assume she read that post since she quoted it right before she rudely replied to it.

This is one of the reasons that I suggested that NRGNY to go back to the "thread we shall not name" last week instead of attempting to work out the drama on the Specularium thread. He did listen to my request, so this was not meant as an attack on him.

Additionally, not everyone can see the Specularium thread. It requires 75 posts to see.

1 hour ago, OnceUponATime said:

I contemplated posting this here but decided wtf maybe we need this. Feel free to join in as to why having been born with a penis would be good.

To damn right I have penis envy. Let me tell you some of the reasons why I would love to have been born with a penis:

Peeing

I could just whip it out to pee. No need to get half undressed and go squatting.

Peeing would be cheaper. Where I live now there are public urinals. They are free to use. Women's toilets? ha, that is a joke right? because you know I actually have to pay to use a toilet here. Yeah, it costs me but not the guys. Or I must buy a drink somewhere and hope they don't get shitty at me because I only got my drink to use their toilet (because sometimes they do. it is weird).

Peeing would take less time. Ever stood at the airport waiting in line to go to the toilet? You see about 20 guys go in and out before the first female reappears. I don't know why that is, but damn that would be nice.

Great old aunt flo

If I was born without a penis I wouldn't have personally encountered that damn aunt. That damn aunt is annoying as hell

I wouldn't have fainted at school when that aunt made an unexpected appearance. More than once. It is no fun trying to get to the sickbay having to walk up and down flights of concrete stairs when you vision has reduced to 2d black and white fuzz.

I wouldn't have been bullied because one day the aunt came unexpected, fast and hard and i ended up leaving a bit puddle of blood on the seat. I had no clue, couldn't avoid it. but man did that bullying stab my heart into little shreds

no cramps, no vomiting, no having to spend shitloads on sanitary products over the years, or on contraceptives.

Work

i would have been paid more, on average for what I have done so far if I could whip out that penis. Maybe I should consider a strap-on, do you think that would work?

That time I had a nice 'discussion' with someone about 7 levels of management higher, I probably would have obtained answers. and those answers would have probably been more truthful than the shit I was fed. I called that manager guy out on his lies while my direct manager and her manager gaped at me. Afterwards they said they hadn't expected a girl such as myself to say such things.

No one would have told me "even a girl can go into engineering" and then express disappointment that I didn't want to be that 'token girl' doing it. It wasn't because I didn't want to be a token, it was because I didn't want to do engineering. Apparently because I was an intelligent girl I was meant to do it to prove girls could. That person isn't me. If I was a guy my choice to take a different career path wouldn't have been so condescendingly questioned. How do I know? well the guys who academically ranked at the same level as me didn't get it. one little bit.

And that is just a little bit of why I envy penis holders. Yes I wish I was born with one. My bf is glad I wasn't. Having penis envy doesn't make me hate guys; I don't really care about their status to be honest, it's mine that matters.

I just wanted to add I think that Trump's claim about his size is about as reliable as his claim about how good a business man he is.

Marry me!

I do not agree with Freud's penis envy theory, but I'll defend to the death* your right to post about it.**

* metaphorical death.  my convictions are remarkably flexible in the face of danger.

** as long as they are no tou violations which will require extra work for the mods.  So far so good.