Jump to content

Buffy's Commentary

  • entries
    275
  • comments
    1,403
  • views
    51,700

Conflicted about Christmas


HerNameIsBuffy

3,878 views

So why am I talking about Christmas before Halloween when I hate that?  Because we moved over the summer and I'm seeing a different side to this new neighborhood.  It seemed like a nice, normal, stereotypically suburban neighborhood when we got here which goes to show you should never move to a neighborhood without first checking it out in Holiday season.

Within two square blocks we have a dozen or so excessively decorated houses for Halloween.  I don't mean a couple of window decals...I mean full on lights, yard scenes, and enough inflatables to rivals Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade.  I can only image we'll be visible from the naked eye from the space station in December.

So I kicked off my annual 'let's skip the whole Christmas thing this year' a little early.  My proposition is always: no decorating, no trees, no holiday movies...I will do one weekend of baking (no sense punishing anyone by denying them homemade kolachkis, cranberry bread, etc.  I'm not completely without a soul.)

The thing is ...I'm torn.  I blame my parents.  They were, in most ways, polar opposites.  My mom was perpetually cheerful, optimistic, sunny, extroverted, and genuinely, inherently kind to everyone family or stranger alike because she truly saw the best in everyone (even when it didn't exist).  My dad was....none of those things.  He had many fine qualities - just not those.  

Their differences were particularly striking when it came to the holidays.  My mom was all about the personal attention and extrodinary effort to pick out just the right gift which shows how well you know someone.  My dad's philosophy was that thoughtfulness was for people who didn't have money.  Why knock yourself out trying to figure out what people want when they already know what they want so you can just give them cash?  And if they want gifts to open fine...they can make a list complete with stores, item #s, etc.  Less Santa and more like ordering from a catalog.  

With dad's way you were never surprised or emotionally moved, but you also didn't get the sometimes epic fails when Mom got it wrong.  Was nice to have a mix.  They divorced when I was very young so the dichotomy of their decorating styles affected me as well.  

Dad's idea of decorating for Christmas:

 

image.thumb.jpg.fabc4a9eb5948b252c9c18ed

There.  Happy now?

Where Mom would have thought these people were off to a good start...

 

image.thumb.jpg.c49b44a60a56e16e6f10f9ec

And if she had thought of it, I absolutely would have been picked up from school in a station wagon version of this...

image.thumb.jpg.712fcf7541e1071f5a524bf0

In most ways I am my father's daughter.  I am not a fan of people, fuss, exuberance makes me emotionally itchy.  And I want to opt out of the Christmas stuff because I do the lions share of the work and I'm never rewarded with those Normal Rockwell moments.  My kids bicker when helping set up the trees, complain about my baking their siblings favorite cookies before theirs, mercilessly mock my holiday penguin collection, and even though all young adults still can't manage to buy for each other or their father without involving me (unfortunately we don't have enough money to make my dad's solution workable so we have to do the effort thing.)

And asking for the three of them to get together for one nice photo...you'd think I was suggesting taking out their organs with Bactine and a butter knife to sell on the black market.  But the second I suggest not decorating?  

image.thumb.jpg.7531f76b93a1fa808bbbf9b4

But I'm going to try to stick to it this year.  Not caving to those faces - they know where the Christmas things are and can have at it if they like... but except for two days of baking I'm opting out.  No cheer, no desktop wallpaper of pets in holiday outfits,no buying every penguin item I see, no shopping and all the extra free time I save will be my gift to me.

this will not be my wallpaper...

image.thumb.jpg.9829f88e61aa15bfba253eb9

 

nor this...

image.thumb.jpg.f704d211dc92272cf8a1229d

image.thumb.jpg.bdeecdcd019eef781ab299b0

This...

image.thumb.jpg.01b6070718f4817b4ff2f20b

this..

.image.thumb.jpg.2f2dd2b39455de97eedd9fca

this...

image.thumb.jpg.34e055130529d3ac90da3aaa

or this...

image.thumb.jpg.d55ccc83db871f6d5971bb87

none of that cuteness.  I mean it this year, I'm sitting this out.

 

image.jpg

image.thumb.jpg.88cbdf8517ab5a1a738bdeac 

  • Upvote 3

14 Comments


Recommended Comments

church_of_dog

Posted

If you think that got it out of your system, you're probably wrong.  :pb_lol:

  • Upvote 2
Link to comment
halcionne

Posted

Did the cat tell him to fuck off??? :thumbsup: 

I can't find the rofl emoticon. :thumbsdown:

  • Upvote 1
Link to comment
HerNameIsBuffy

Posted

hmmm...you're right...i can't find it either.  Looked like we have some that still need to be put into categories, but I couldn't find it in the old file either.  But I don't have my glasses on and am only into one cup of coffee so I'll look later when i can see.  :32:

Link to comment
halcionne

Posted

Aww, don't worry about it. I wanted to use it here, is all. It's one of my faves.

Thanks for removing the video so my comment doesn't make sense, btw. :pb_lol:

Link to comment
HerNameIsBuffy

Posted (edited)

Aww, don't worry about it. I wanted to use it here, is all. It's one of my faves.

Thanks for removing the video so my comment doesn't make sense, btw. :pb_lol:

I didn't remove the video?  I just fixed some formatting on this one....lemme check.

 

the video is a stand alone entry - previous one.  And yes, talking kitty says bad words!  His language is nsfw but I love him!

Edited by HerNameIsBuffy
Link to comment
Destiny

Posted

I fucking love you and your blog and you are my hero buffy. Thank you for making me laugh this morning. I needed it.

  • Upvote 2
Link to comment
Cartmann99

Posted

I love Christmas, but on my own terms. I don't have children, so some of my choices are easier than for those with children. The whole decorate the house within an inch of its life and spend lots of money on gifts is not me. I have two small ceramic Christmas trees that I set out, some homemade stockings that I tack up on the wall, and a wreath for the front door. Our gift gifting is very scaled down. We only buy a small gift for our mothers and the local nephew who is still a kid. We watch some Christmas movies, I bake some goodies for us and for a few other folks, and on Christmas Day I make a nice turkey dinner.

If someone gives me a Christmas present, I thank them and mail them a handwritten thank you note. I don't get upset if it's someone that I didn't buy a gift for. If they get upset, that is on them. I don't expect gifts from people, but I can't control what they choose to do.

I really hope you are able to have the Christmas that you desire. :my_shy: The holiday season can be very stressful for a lot of people.

 

  • Upvote 1
Link to comment
CallmeChaCha

Posted

Ummm, I have that Charlie Brown Christmas tree.  I don't think there's anything wrong with it.  It's perfect. :snooty::hand:  In fact, sometimes I think it's too much, what with having to find a place to store it.  Annoying as hell.  :kitty-wink:

I've never heard of or seen inflatables for Halloween.  That's very... festive. 

Errr... we have this? :tw_elephant:

  • Upvote 1
Link to comment
halcionne

Posted

Aww, don't worry about it. I wanted to use it here, is all. It's one of my faves.

Thanks for removing the video so my comment doesn't make sense, btw. :pb_lol:

I didn't remove the video?  I just fixed some formatting on this one....lemme check.

 

the video is a stand alone entry - previous one.  And yes, talking kitty says bad words!  His language is nsfw but I love him!

Hmm okay. I'm not firing on all cylinders today, sorry about that! :my_blush:

Link to comment
HerNameIsBuffy

Posted

Ummm, I have that Charlie Brown Christmas tree.  I don't think there's anything wrong with it.  It's perfect. :snooty::hand:  In fact, sometimes I think it's too much, what with having to find a place to store it.  Annoying as hell.  :kitty-wink:

I've never heard of or seen inflatables for Halloween.  That's very... festive. 

Errr... we have this? :tw_elephant:

yeah, last couple of years it's become a thing around here.  I'll grab a pic next time I'm out.  Not my thing but I do prefer a giant inflatable cartoony ghost to the people who hang 'bodies' from the trees ...the ghoulish stuff is creepy.

Link to comment
VelociRapture

Posted

Just commenting to say I want to steal all the doggies in those pictures you posted - but mostly that Pug wearing a Christmas hat that looks like it works for, "The Ministry of Silly Walks." :pb_lol:

  • Upvote 1
Link to comment
Eternalbluepearl

Posted

I loved this blog post. I have no children, but I can totally understand your feelings. Your efforts feel unappreciated, am I right? I one hundred percent think it's ridiculous that the young adults need to involve you in gift buying for each other. I would totally remove myself from that as well. They can bake their own damn cookies too! Sorry, I get overzealous. 

  • Upvote 1
Link to comment

Our neighbors across the street used to go all out for Halloween. 

Huge inflatables, lights, the works.    They had an inflatable headless horseman in a black carriage, an inflatable spooky guy playing an inflatable organ, a vampire lifting up the lid of his coffin and poking his head out, stuff like that.

Now their kids are grown and they don't decorate for Halloween any more.

I'm embarrassed to say I kind of miss it...

 

  • Upvote 1
Link to comment
HerNameIsBuffy

Posted (edited)

I loved this blog post. I have no children, but I can totally understand your feelings. Your efforts feel unappreciated, am I right? I one hundred percent think it's ridiculous that the young adults need to involve you in gift buying for each other. I would totally remove myself from that as well. They can bake their own damn cookies too! Sorry, I get overzealous. 

Totally appreciate the support!  But on the cookies thing though...I like cookies and they will be yummier if I make them.  :)  Actually, I do enjoy baking quite a bit and I absolutely love Christmas baking so I'd do that even if I didn't have kids.  Although I'd have to accost random strangers and force treats on them against their will.  

My mom was an amazing baker...adequate cook but she could bake things you couldn't believe were created by a mortal.  (She always said baking =/= cooking and they are two very different skill sets.  Baking is science, cooking is art.)  Anyway, she's been gone over 20 years and I miss her every day but when the ache gets more pronounced nothing makes me feel better than trying to kick ass at her specialties.  I know how much she would adore my kids if she were here now and it kind of feels like she's loving them through me when I bake her stuff.  No changes, no additions, no substitutions for the classics.  

  • Chocolate eclairs (everything from scratch.  Pate a choux, creme de patisseriechocolate ganache.)
  • Kolachkis
  • Soft ginger cookies (jinger?)  (Gramma)
  • Spritz cookies
  • Candy Cane cookies
  • Cranberry Bread/muffins (that's all Gramma, though)
  • Brownies
  • Vanillekipferln (Almond crescent cookies)
  • Pfeffernusse (still haven't perfected)
  • Pizelle 
  • Turtle candy
  • Honey candy 
  • fudge
  • pflamenkuchen (not even close yet - I totally suck)
  • Pecan Shortbread
  • Pecan Rolls

I've added to the list with recipes I've just found but they beg for...nothing traditional or special but as long as made with love...

  • chocolate chip cookies with/without:  pecans, dried cranberries, both, neither
  • white chocolate chip cookies with/without:  Macadamia nuts, dried cranberries, both, neither
  • crinkle cookies (essentially brownies but more of a pita to make)
  • Almond snowballs (thank you Rachel Ray - her basic recipe but I tweaked it and made it better (sorry RR!)  replaced my mom's macaroons in the line up as close enough flavor wise but way easier (sorry, Mom!)

There is an ingredient which keeps coming up...I feel a blog post coming on...

 

Edited by HerNameIsBuffy
  • Upvote 2
Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Posts

    • Xan

      Posted

      The egg apron is a deal breaker for me.  That was just an insult.  "You think you deserve a gift?  I'll show you your place!"

      And I'm a little bit tired of the social media scolds.  If they didn't put their lives on the internet, we wouldn't have opinions.  They did so we do.  If most of us think that he's a bully, he probably is.  I guess it's another case of the husband being so full of himself that he was sure the interview would show him in a good light.  It didn't.

      • Upvote 1
    • Xan

      Posted

      I always find these Trump fantasy worlds very bizarre.  He's never in a nice suit meeting a world leader or even in a fireman's suit saving a child from a burning building.  It's always some fake macho outfit and, in this case, driving a car with a Confederate flag on it.  Their heroes don't seem that heroic.

    • JDuggs

      Posted

      On 12/22/2023 at 11:51 PM, JDuggs said:

      It looks like Micah is in a relationship, or very good friends, with this Florida realtor Veronica Peters. I’ve seen photos of them together on Micah’s IG, but I always thought she kind of looked too old for him. Maybe not.

      This was on Moriah’s IG:

        Hide contents

      image.thumb.jpeg.e5583f82734714ccb023fc889e4f0f90.jpeg

      And this was on Veronica’s personal IG and professional IG:

        Hide contents

      image.thumb.jpeg.e637a588be2f14fc379935962e743f47.jpeg

        Hide contentsimage.thumb.png.bfaa9a4a2ac77388067acef5c5afb81c.png

       

      Quoting myself from six months ago. I think this really is Micah’s girlfriend. She doesn’t seem quite as public about their relationship as she did back then.

      This photo of Veronica didn’t get copied over from my old post.

      Spoiler

      image.thumb.jpeg.0ae44da117d43f1db49868c42924ea03.jpeg

       

      • Upvote 1
    • JermajestyDuggar

      Posted

      There was a post on social media talking about this recent interview with Ballerina Farm and asking what people think about some of the things in it. So many commenters were like, “it’s her business! It’s not your life so why do you care?” This is the type of thing that bugs me to no end. Ballerina Farm posts their lives willingly! They post their children’s lives! Of course people will speculate and care! If they didn’t put their lives all over social media none of us would know anything about them. 

      • Upvote 1
    • LongTimeLurkerOG

      Posted

      On 7/25/2024 at 6:47 PM, LilMissMetaphor said:

      Just FYI in case someone missed it the first time round, this is what Art wrote on Reddit a year ago addressing some of the concerns that were brought up.  It's very telling if you read between some of the lines.

      "I don’t lie or make fraudulent claims to get money. That’s what a grifter is. I’ve closed all previous fundraisers and not all of them were successfully funded – for instance my legal name change and wedding fund did not get funded, so I still haven’t had a chance to do those things.

      I’m unable to work for a variety of medically supported reasons. It’s not okay to ask disabled people for proof of their disability simply because it’s medical information. To entertain the question is to concede that it’s okay to go ask other disabled people for their private medical history. It’s a common misconception that people pretend to be disabled for benefits or monetary gain, but it’s rare and doesn’t really make sense to do because benefits and fundraising add up to so little.

      I have been going to Seattle to look at possible places to live because it’s literally unavoidable, and I’ve been in severe pain because of it. That doesn’t mean I could do manual labor on a consistent basis. I don’t even drive, so I’ve had to cover gas and ask friends for help with rides.

      Have you ever tried working at a call center? I have. They’re severely strict and demanding, and incredibly demoralizing without paying much. They’re not an accessible alternative for people who can’t do more demanding manual labor. “Get a job like the rest of us” is ableist and is a fundamental misunderstanding of how accessible jobs are. It’s no better than yelling it at someone panhandling on the street. The supposedly “easy” or “low-skill” jobs are still difficult to do.

      I do use what resources I can, but it’s a total myth that there’s a robust social welfare system anywhere in the United States. If there was, we wouldn’t have so many hundreds of thousands of homeless people here, with millions more just a few missed paychecks away from joining them.

      The toxic mold was confirmed. My partner is literally terminally ill from it. If you read the actual updates, the name of the illness and the research surrounding it have been detailed. We have a letter from the pulmonologist that we sent to the landlord explaining that the environment my partner was in was causing the illness. Again, you’re demanding medical proof that you have no reason to ask about. Some things can’t just be washed out.

      I am as clear as I can possibly be about specific needs so that people know what they’re helping to support. I have said again and again that people shouldn’t give unless they can spare it and want to help. I even said that in the post linked to in this comment thread. My patreon is explicitly to support my writing.

      So why am I still fundraising and making money off telling my story? Because I literally have no other real options. I’ve been formally diagnosed with PTSD, it’s not “alleged trauma.” If it was working all that well, I wouldn’t have to keep detailing my needs.

      The real grifters in our society are billionaires, not poor disabled people. You sound like you just hate us for trying to exist."

      I remember reading this before. Well, they can take all their reasons and Stop. Grifting. Plenty of people with disabilities work and /or receive assistance (as I mentioned previously, my exPOS, who has disabilities so I'm familiar with a number of options and money). Some family, have / had disabilities. I've been an advocate for services and staff training (and provided training) for Years with previous positions - because it matters to me. So, yea, Artemis get. a. job. 

      57 minutes ago, Ozlsn said:

      Art lists manual labour and call centres. And that's it. Not any jobs they could look at involving writing, from editing to writing student essays for money (yes it's dodgy but people do it). Not even playing video games for money (get character to a level where they have cool stuff for someone.)  Nothing about remote work, which there is more of now, and not even entry level white collar work.

      On the one hand I agree with them that the social support is inadequate, and that detailing your medical needs shouldn't have to happen - but they just grifted nearly $5000 to move and for a holiday, and with the amount of effort that took they probably could have held down employment of some description and to be honest would probably be better off.

      So many WFH/remote legit jobs now. Hell, you can play games on your phone and earn gift cards; donate blood and get gift cards. I knew a homeless couple that donated plasma for higher amount g.c.

      Absolutely! The amount of money; it's disgusting. And that amount of effort... At some point, even we don't want to or circumstances we don't want to deal with and adult, because... We're adults! Plenty of things I want to ignore or not deal with, just have go away but persevere because the alternative... not an option.

      2 hours ago, Bookworm1564 said:

      My all-time favourite Art post is the one where they say “Just for today, you can double the impact of your support with this opportunity” as if this was the moment we were all waiting for.

      Like a sale for limited-time-only 🤣



×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use.