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Keeping Up With The Dunkels - A Fundie Legacy - Chapter 4


singsingsing

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Before we begin, I have to apologize. I previously stated that Andrew Dunkel was Blessing #4, but I was wrong - he was Blessed Blessing #5! Despite what Wilbur and Cathy may think, the twins are not, in fact, a single entity.

Now, on with the show.

 

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House reno! Kids are expensive, but they're also great for grifting! It was slow going, but the Dunkels were gradually bringing in enough money from their hard earned grifting to at least survive.

 

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School of the dining room... floor?

 

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Adam became a teenager! "Happy Birthday, Adam! You are such a diligent young man who loves Jesus and has a servant's heart! We're so excited to see where the Lord leads you!" Adam took his role as eldest brother very seriously, and his most cherished dream was to follow in the footsteps of his father by finding a godly young woman to marry and then mercilessly impregnate over and over again for the next 25 years.

 

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Adam also enthusiastically embraced his family's grifting activities. He learned from the best!

 

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Cathy appeared somewhat conflicted to learn that she was expecting Blessing #8, but quickly corrected her countenance. Children are SUCH a blessing! Babies are like flowers, they wilt and die if you have more of them than you can care for. Wait, no, that's not it... you can never have too many flowers. Yeah, that's right - never too many flowers!

 

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Hey, remember the second set of Dunkel twins? Well, here they are becoming toddlers! Their names are Adalyn and Avalee, by the way. Don't worry, Cathy has a tough time remembering, too.

 

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"Hey, guys. Uh... remember me? I'm your son, Andrew! Your 4th 5th blessing! Guys? ...Guys? Does anyone have normal pajamas I could borrow?"

 

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"Happy Birthday, Abigail! You are such a sweet young lady with a heart for the Lord and a charitable spirit! We can't wait to see where God leads you!" Actually, the truth was that though Wilbur and Cathy tried to hide it, they were disappointed in Abigail and VERY concerned about her testimony. Whereas their precious eldest son Adam was everything they wished and more, Abigail complained about her chores, complained about having to homeschool the children, and seemed to want to do nothing more than play games and goof around. Her parents prayed fervently that the Lord would convict her to repent and be a proper young lady... (Adam rolled the 'Family' aspiration. Abigail rolled 'Pleasure'. Uh oh!)

 

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As Cathy went into labour, her concerned children raced into the room to assist with the delivery!

 

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Adam was thrilled to have a new baby brother, Abel Dunkel! No one else seemed to care.

 

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10 people living in one house with only one bathroom was beginning to take its toll. But Wilbur insisted that they not do more renovations until they had grifted enough to be sure of staying out of debt. If that meant peeing on the floor, so be it.

 

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Aimee Joy was very diligent about practicing her homemaking skills. She was going to make a wonderful wife and mommy one day (very soon)!

 

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Aimee Joy was also very diligent about helping with the family grifting. Wilbur and Cathy had great hopes that she would not turn out like disappointment Abigail, seen on the far left squandering time by playing with the toy car. Bless her heart!

 

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Wilbur entered a new season of life. He took it philosophically, content in the knowledge that his wife at least was still young enough to impregnate a few more times.

 

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"Yeah, girl! Work it! NO ONE rocks a pioneer dress like YOU, baby!" Oh dear. Abigail, on top of being lazy and disobedient, had now developed a nasty streak of VANITY. Her parents CRIED OUT TO THE LORD for her salvation, when they weren't busy babymaking or collapsing in exhaustion from dealing with their umpteen other children.

 

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Adalyn and Avalee had soon left the toddler stage behind them, and entered childhood. And not a moment too soon, because there were infants to care for, floors to sweep, and toilets to clean!

 

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Quick reminder that Abel exists and became a toddler.

 

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Yes, God smiled upon Cathy again and placed another precious gift to grow in her blessed womb. Nine months later, it was time to welcome yet another Dunkel into the world. There's nothing quite like going into labour and giving birth while five of your children surround you and shout in terror!

 

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"Oh God, not ANOTHER ONE," thought Abigail, as she was introduced to her brand new baby brother, Asher Dunkel!

 

Thanks for tuning in again! Next time on Keeping Up With The Dunkels: Will Cathy and Wilbur manage to produce the coveted blessing #10 before the Lord sees fit to close Cathy's womb? Will they remember that their non-twin children exist? Will Wilbur finally grift enough to put in a second bathroom and buy a kitchen table? Will singsingsing find a skin set to download so the men don't look like they're wearing eyeliner all the time? 

  • Upvote 13

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Furbabiesonly

Posted

Love this! A few months ago I was "convicted" to start a fundie family on the Sims 4 with pretty much the same legacy rules you have, although I usually let the youngest take the house after the rest have been married off, regardless of gender (Although of course if it's a girl she has to be married already) 

The Sims 4 has an annoying feature where they delete sims from the family tree after the game has like 150 sims or so total, I think it's a memory problem. But it inspired me to go to the effort of logging my family tree, although sadly my first generation and some of the S generation had passed away by them so I couldn't get pictures. 

https://theplumtreeapp.com/public.html#5983b5c9c2e07d3b7af2d114

  • Upvote 3
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Gillyweed

Posted

Love it! Do  you use any cc or mods? I've recently fallen down the cc rabbithole.

  • Upvote 2
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singsingsing

Posted

@Gillyweed I have a TON of cc. It was all downloaded like 10+ years ago, back when I used to play Sims 2 all the time, but I hung onto it. I do play with a few mods - the faster homework mod (I'm sorry, I know it's cheating but there's no way sim kids need to spend 4 hours doing their homework after school), unlimited sims per household... hmm... I also have a hacked coat rack that makes every outfit available to your sims. There may be a couple others, but I'm blanking on them now!

  • Upvote 3
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AlwaysExcited

Posted

Lol, green pregnancy shirt. 

So, I spent quite some time yesterday and today playing with sim fundies again. 
Zachary Ranford is a patriarch. He has no education, started out with no skills, and lives in a van down by the river. He married first woman that didn't find him repulsive and is currently trying to figure out how to get a roof over their heads and food in their fridge. It's Autumn, and if they can't build a house, it will be a very long winter. But that's not what's important! They just had their first baby! #Blessed
I'm tempted to start a blog for them. 

  • Upvote 5
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WhatWouldJohnCrichtonDo?

Posted

I'm really enjoying this family! :my_biggrin: I have a question about Wilbur's wardrobe, though. Did God convict him that he shouldn't wear clothes on certain days?

Spoiler

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Or did he just forget to buy grift some used clothes? :pb_lol:

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NotQuiteMotY

Posted

19 hours ago, singsingsing said:

@Gillyweed I have a TON of cc. It was all downloaded like 10+ years ago, back when I used to play Sims 2 all the time, but I hung onto it. I do play with a few mods - the faster homework mod (I'm sorry, I know it's cheating but there's no way sim kids need to spend 4 hours doing their homework after school), unlimited sims per household... hmm... I also have a hacked coat rack that makes every outfit available to your sims. There may be a couple others, but I'm blanking on them now!

I did wonder how you were fitting this many Sims into one house! 

This is a lot of fun to read and I'm amazed you're able to keep track of this many. 

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singsingsing

Posted

@WhatWouldJohnCrichtonDo? Er, yeah... Wilbur, along with not really being a job-type person, is apparently not really a clothes-type person either... :pb_eek:

(Seriously, sims are freaking weird. They walk around inappropriately dressed all the time, and with like 2000 of them in the same house, well... it's hard to remember to care. :pb_lol:)

  • Upvote 3
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I used to be a very active Sims 2 player (computer corrected sims to sins! :pb_lol:) and I love this! I was wondering how you'd make a REAL #blessed fundie family since the game only allows for 8 people per lot, but apparently there's a cheat code! Of course a REAL #blessed fundie family consists of way more than 6 kids, you've got to have at least 15! ;) 

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littlemommy

Posted

Every time I see that coat hanging on the rack I think it’s the grim reaper showing up in the game. All of those pregnancies...Cathy (? I forgot mom’s name!) is playing with fire!

 

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  • Posts

    • thoughtful

      Posted (edited)

      31 minutes ago, Joyster said:

      I am sure, Gary and I would have very different ideas about what needs to be fixed. I do not understand Donnie‘s comment. Is bedumb a reference to public assistance?

      I think "bedumb" is supposed to be a witty nickname for Biden.

      The post broke another irony meter for me. Gary and his buddies go on and on about how they are broken and worthless, and have "nothin' to brag on but Jesus," and they sure do get a lot of attention for it.

      31 minutes ago, Joyster said:

      He then makes a really bad joke about how she was beating him again. I don’t know why he thinks spousal abuse is humorous. He says his marriage communication tips worked for couples he really had little hope for. One wife was so angry after a counseling session that she tried to run Pastor Dave over with her car. 15 years later, that couple is still together!

      Isn't he a slick and slimy one?

      ETA - I see @SisterCupcake and I were typing at the same time.

      Edited by thoughtful
      • Upvote 2
    • SisterCupcake

      Posted

      28 minutes ago, Joyster said:

      Gary posted this today:
      IMG_1870.thumb.jpeg.470437673e01f100dbd471432f2e92e4.jpeg

      I am sure, Gary and I would have very different ideas about what needs to be fixed. I do not understand Donnie‘s comment. Is bedumb a reference to public assistance?

        Hide contents

      IMG_1871.thumb.jpeg.ad97f3c58338a1ae22167b6adee22aee.jpeg

      I listened to Pastor Baker’s “Never Argue with Your Spouse” video. I find him really annoying, but his communication tips were actually very good except for one part. He said couples should agree on an opening line for talking about a problem. The husband’s opening line should always be something expressing love because that’s what women want. The wife’s should be something showing respect because that’s what men want. With one couple he counseled, the husband wanted the wife to say, “Sir, we need to talk…” The wife didn’t like that, and Baker told her to be thankful that the husband didn’t want her to call him lord like Sarah called Abraham in the Bible. 

      Baker urges couples to seek coaches for problems they’ve tabled and can’t agree on. He and Laura have had a marriage coach since their honeymoon even though they didn’t really need it until a few years ago. He then makes a really bad joke about how she was beating him again. I don’t know why he thinks spousal abuse is humorous. He says his marriage communication tips worked for couples he really had little hope for. One wife was so angry after a counseling session that she tried to run Pastor Dave over with her car. 15 years later, that couple is still together!


      And on another note not really related to Gary, if a fundie (Gary twice removed friend) mentions his only sin in a marriage was seeing two adulterers on a computer screen, does that mean he looked at pornography? It seemed like such a strange euphemism.

      Bedum is a reference to Joe Biden. Biden, bedum, get it??? Hehe 🙄🙄Fundies think they’re so clever! 

      • Thank You 1
    • Joyster

      Posted

      Gary posted this today:
      IMG_1870.thumb.jpeg.470437673e01f100dbd471432f2e92e4.jpeg

      I am sure, Gary and I would have very different ideas about what needs to be fixed. I do not understand Donnie‘s comment. Is bedumb a reference to public assistance?

      Spoiler

      IMG_1871.thumb.jpeg.ad97f3c58338a1ae22167b6adee22aee.jpeg

      I listened to Pastor Baker’s “Never Argue with Your Spouse” video. I find him really annoying, but his communication tips were actually very good except for one part. He said couples should agree on an opening line for talking about a problem. The husband’s opening line should always be something expressing love because that’s what women want. The wife’s should be something showing respect because that’s what men want. With one couple he counseled, the husband wanted the wife to say, “Sir, we need to talk…” The wife didn’t like that, and Baker told her to be thankful that the husband didn’t want her to call him lord like Sarah called Abraham in the Bible. 

      Baker urges couples to seek coaches for problems they’ve tabled and can’t agree on. He and Laura have had a marriage coach since their honeymoon even though they didn’t really need it until a few years ago. He then makes a really bad joke about how she was beating him again. I don’t know why he thinks spousal abuse is humorous. He says his marriage communication tips worked for couples he really had little hope for. One wife was so angry after a counseling session that she tried to run Pastor Dave over with her car. 15 years later, that couple is still together!


      And on another note not really related to Gary, if a fundie (Gary twice removed friend) mentions his only sin in a marriage was seeing two adulterers on a computer screen, does that mean he looked at pornography? It seemed like such a strange euphemism.

      • Thank You 3
    • NotQuiteMotY

      Posted

      On 4/11/2024 at 3:40 PM, JermajestyDuggar said:

      Karissa says her kids don’t like to read. I’m sorry but that’s a huge red flag. If homeschool kids don’t like to read, it’s because there’s a problem. 

      Not even the homeschooling part, the statement that ALL of them "don't like to read." Out of how many, none? That seems hinky to me.

    • marmalade

      Posted

      7 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

      It could be that too. Either she doesn’t want to talk about how she won’t have sex with her husband for months after birth or she doesn’t want to talk about pulling out. Because both of those things could be looked down upon by other fundies in her circle. 

      But it's certainly implied that she's doing *something*. But no, she won't say more lest she is thought to be a bad Christian. 🙄



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