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Trynn's Parodies

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In Which The Doodys Meet Mrs. Clifton


Trynn

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“Mrs. Clifton, you have some visitors. I hope you have a nice visit.” Miss Jenkins said as she disappeared from the room.

 

Mrs. Clifton was sitting in a reclining chair, reading Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. She looked a little tired but otherwise healthy. Her hair was pulled back into a silvery bun. Her face was peacefully calm. She wore a light pink dress and matching slippers. Mrs. Clifton waved them to come closer. Howdy Doody shook her hand. “Good morning!” he said in a voice that was way too cheery for anyone at this time of the morning. “I'm Howdy Doody, and this is my wife Doodley.”

 

“I'm Bax,” said Bax, shaking Mrs. Clifton's hand.

 

“I'm Bollie,” said Bollie, shaking Mrs. Clifton's hand so hard her teeth rattled.

 

“I'm Bitch,” said Bitch, also shaking her hand.

 

“And I'm Baddie,” said Baddie, as she squeezed Mrs. Clifton's hand as hard as her little hand could.

 

Even that was enough to tire Mrs. Clifton out these days, but she decided to do what she could to remain positive. She smiled. “What a lovely family!” She exclaimed as the Doodys stared back at her with gummy vacant smiles that didn't quite reach their eyes. “I've seen your family around, and I can't believe we've never officially met.”

In fact, the Doodys kept to themselves so much that gossip about them ran rampant. Nobody really knew them very well at all, actually.

Howdy continued to smile as he told Mrs. Clifton about finding Honey. Mrs. Clifton wasn't good at hiding her emotions, so Howdy tried to reassure her. “Don't worry,” he said robotically. “No harm was done.”

That you know of Mrs. Clifton thought warily. She didn't think the Doodys would intentionally harm Honey, but with the way they treated the children sometimes.... she forced herself to pay attention to Howdy as he explained how Sharon had told them where to find her.

“It is especially hard to be away from my precious Honey,” she said out loud. I will have to have a talk with Sharon about who she gives my information to. “I know she is a very busy lady. I'm hoping to be back at my house by the end of summer.” Oh dear, that was the wrong thing to say, wasn't it? These pain pills they give me cloud my mind so much. I wish I didn't need them.

“We're sorry to hear about your troubles,” Doodley Doody said, wringing her hands. She looked at Howdy, who nodded. Doodley resumed speaking.  “We want to offer to take care of Honey until you can come home. Your house is right around the corner from us, and the children can walk there every day. They really like Honey, and would be happy to help.” Mrs. Doody clasped her hands together and bit her lip. Was it Mrs. Clifton's imagination, or did she sound nervous? Poor thing probably isn't used to leaving the house, let alone talking to strangers. Or do I just think that because the Narco is kicking in really hard? I need to lie down. I can't think.

“I'm afraid that would be a lot of trouble,” she said through a haze of pain pills.

Mr. Doody took a step closer. His smile remained fixed. “Mrs. Clifton, we would like to take care of Honey.”

Mrs. Clifton smiled. “You're all too kind.” She glanced at the bible tucked under Mr. Doodys arm. “Are you Christians?” Oh why did I ask that? That's a personal question.

Howdy Doody smiled even wider, if that were possible, and said, “Yes. I am only a sinner saved by the blood of Jesus and trusting Him.”

Mrs. Clifton closed her eyes. When she opened them, the Doodys were still there. Howdy looked like he was about to open his Bible, and just the thought of sitting through a bible study made Mrs. Clifton tired. So so tired. “I knew you were not an ordinary family,” she said. “I too love Jesus. I would be very grateful if you would care for Honey.”

Mrs. Clifton wasn't sure the family knew the same Jesus she did. The Jesus she loved would never have spanked Bollie out in public simply for asking her mother for a third animal cracker. Howdy Doody said more things, and opened his Bible and read from it, but Mrs. Clifton was so tired she didn't understand a word.  Finally, a nurse came in and told the Doody family that Mrs. Clifton needed her rest.

The nurse helped Mrs. Clifton get to bed. As she finally drifted off, she thought, I really must remember to call Sharon and give her what for.

 

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I decided the Doody children have B names JUST so I could name two of them "Baddie" and "Bitch."

I thought about getting more creative but there's no point, as the characters are cardboard cutouts in the novels anyway.

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mango_fandango

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I've started writing Moody/Maxwell parodies but they aren't really funny like yours. Then again I haven't written much in them so I can still stick stupid stuff in... :pb_biggrin:

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I'm sure yours are still very good. Lord knows mine could use a bit of work, even if they are decent as they stand.

 

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  • Posts

    • Xan

      Posted

      8 hours ago, neuroticcat said:

      She talked about how the little children were taking bread from the pantry and putting it in there. So maybe it was clean when it came home but then the food got in it? 

      I think she just lied.  She didn't want to admit that she hadn't even opened the cabinet and cleaned it out so she blamed it on the boys.  They'd have no reason to put bread in there and, honestly, it didn't look like bread crumbs.  Abbie was so excited over her latest ugly find that it hadn't occurred to her to clean it up first.

      • Upvote 1
    • JermajestyDuggar

      Posted

      I think the little boys just get up to lots of shenanigans because Braggie refuses to supervise them. 

      • Upvote 1
    • JermajestyDuggar

      Posted

      8 hours ago, SassyPants said:

      I think with all of Josh’s issues, the families still in AR, for the most part, have hunkered down and are protecting their own family’s privacy. The less they expose themselves, the less pushback and snark they receive.

      Which of course is a smart move in my opinion. 

      • Upvote 2
      • I Agree 1
    • dawn9476

      Posted

      People on Reddit think Joy wasn't there, which is understandable since she went through something similar. Going to something like that would probably just bring all that pain back up.

    • Fundyrunner

      Posted

      RE: number of c-sections - I've heard of women in Europe being told 2 only; my friend's parents argued that Americans do more and their doctor okayed four. Women in US 4 only. But have met women who have had 5 sections. Two women I know were told at their last c-section (3rd and 5th) that their uterus was at the point of rupture and advised them to not have any more pregnancies. My point is it's very individual and a doctors should consider individual circumstances.



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