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All Shall Know the Wonder

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By Popular Demand


purple_summer

1,664 views

If you've been in the chat room (which you should because we're awesome) at all this week you have probably either heard this story or heard a reference to this story. I'm posting it here after receiving numerous requests to do so.

 

Last week was a friend's bachelorette outing. Naturally we ended up at a sex shop. This is a really nice place with wonderful staff and quite the range of toys. We spend some time perusing the usual "bachelorette" items- sparkly vibrators, skanky lingerie, penis ring toss. Fairly tame stuff. Friend indicates that she really wants to buy a dildo. No big deal, we're all adults here and sometimes a girl has needs. After looking through several racks of products she still hasn't quite found something that fits her desired....dimensions. 

Roughly an hour later we walk out of the store and she is the proud owner of a 10 inch long 2-3ish inch thick dildo. She originally chose one that was approximately the size of a small newborn before the kind shop owner explained that it might not be quite what she wants... We go about the rest of our evening and I head home after dinner.

As soon as I walk through the door I receive a text message simply stating "well I might have to go to the ER. Not enough lube." My friend was so excited about her new toy that she forgot to take the proper precautions. Good news is that she's fine, just some minor bruising and a hit to her pride.

Moral of the story? Don't go long and wide at the same time.

 

 

For those of you who have missed it, here is the link to the full twitter story that is currently going viral- http://imgur.com/a/WDwyW

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Destiny

Posted

she still hasn't quite found something that fits her desired....dimensions. 

Dead. OMFG LOL!

Also, you forgot the part about having to promise to burn the house down so the dildo that was still stuck to the table wasn't found!

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MarblesMom

Posted

The best part of the story is that you didn't have to burn her house down to remove evidence.  And the take away is LUBE FOR LIFE, people.

GREAT post.  Now you are hooked and must post more MWAH MWAH MWAH.

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HerNameIsBuffy

Posted

This was a much needed cautionary tale and we've all learned something from the PSA.  And at some point I hope to stop laughing because this was too funny.  :)

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laPapessaGiovanna

Posted

Thanks for the laugh! I needed it.

For time zone problems I never find people in the chat, so keep posting that I want to know what I am missing. Lol..

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  • Posts

    • Smee

      Posted

      On 5/22/2024 at 4:36 PM, medimus said:

      A homeschooling, mommy blogger with 11 children who converted from evangelicalism to one of the above latin mass only, skirts only, mothers stay trad catholic groups (I forget which one) is Celeste of Joyouslessons.

       

      I read 'joyous lessons' as 'joylessness' first.

      20 hours ago, Jana814 said:

      I’m always fascinated when someone who was raised not religious & becomes extremely religious. I know 2 people who were raised not very religious Jewish & became very religious.

      I was raised atheist and became very religious in my teens. I was a deep thinking philosophical kid with big emotions, cracking under the pressure of adolescence in an extremely academic environment; Christianity offered me something to help answer the 'why' of it all (although even then, I always believed in the scientific account of the 'how'). I am also - although I didn't understand or have the label for it then - asexual, and the whole notion of no-sex-before-marriage was oddly reassuring to me, like a 'safe' way to date and fall in love with church boys who weren't supposed to want to touch me sexually (spoiler alert: they still did). While I was at university I worked for a Christian organisation and led the youth group at my church, then I got married and moved to a country town where I knew nobody, and the church community was my first 'in' into the community. I was a stay-at-home mother who spent my days going to church playgroup or hosting bible study with other stay-at-home mothers. Regardless of what's happening inside or what your private prayer life is like, when your social group is all religious it helps keep you religious. It's only in the past few years, with my kids all at school, my divorce finalised, working in secular arts organisations, plus time on more forums like this, that I've become a much more liberal Christian who doesn't let it dictate my entire life. 

      • Love 2
    • marmalade

      Posted

      1 minute ago, Coconut Flan said:

      Looks like that's the Justice Dept response to the Duggar appeal not the Supreme Court final.  Reddit was a bit ahead of themselves.

      Yeah, the conclusion states that writ SHOULD BE denied. This is the Fed's response to The Felons plea. Remember, they were granted an extension until 5/24, so this makes sense.

      • Upvote 2
      • Thank You 1
    • Coconut Flan

      Posted

      Looks like that's the Justice Dept response to the Duggar appeal not the Supreme Court final.  Reddit was a bit ahead of themselves.

      • Upvote 2
    • ADoyle90815

      Posted

      • Upvote 1
    • JermajestyDuggar

      Posted

      28 minutes ago, justpassingthru said:

      And yet Amy gives no fucks. 

      I think that’s pretty standard for the vast majority of people who make 7 figures. Most people don’t make that kind of money without stepping on some necks to get there. 

      • Upvote 1
      • I Agree 4


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