The First Story
This is the first Moody Parody I ever wrote. Taken from Summer With The Moodys. The Moody family is going door to door advertising the children's businesses. I thought it would be fun to take a look at the Moodys through the eyes of their neighbors.
Please note that the Maxwells never wrote about a Miss Marple. That's supposed to be a joke, but I'm not sure I made it well. Oh well.
Ding-dong!
Alexa looked up from her textbook. That couldn't be cousin Jane already, she'd never get up this early. As long as whoever it is doesn't wake--
A loud moan came from the other room.
--Grandma. Alexa thought, as the dog, Nox, began to bark incessantly.
“It's ok grandma,” Alexa sighed, closing her paramedic's textbook and standing up. “I'll get it, you stay in bed.”
Alexa went over to one of the windows and slowly pulled back the jet black curtains. Two adults and 4 children stood on the front porch, all dressed in red and khaki. Alexa let the curtain fall quickly. What the--
Alexa's grandma, still in her bathrobe and curlers, shuffled up beside Alexa, yawning sleepily. The dog whined at her ankles, no doubt wanting to go for a morning constitutional.
“Who is it, honey?”
“I don't know gran. These weird people dressed all alike in red khaki, and smiling. They're either 6 months early for Christmas carols, or Jehovah's Witness or...” Or random weird crazy people knocking on our door at way too early o'clock Alexa thought angrily. Thank you for waking my grandmother who is supposed to be resting. Can't this wait till noon? Idiots.
Grandma Maude sighed. “I think they're the Moody family that lives down the street. They're a little strange.... anyway, we have to open the door now. I think the littlest one saw you.” Grandma Maude opened the door.
“Hi boys,” she said pleasantly as possible for someone woken up too early. “What have you there?” She asked, pointing to the flyers.
“We are handing out some flyers. We have a pet sitting business and my sister has a baking business.” The older looking boy said robotically. “Here you go, the flyer will explain more.”
Grandma Maude took the flyer and held it up so she could read it.
MOODY'S PAMPERED PETS
Going on a trip and can't take your pet? Want your pet to have friendly care? We will watch them at our house. We can handle any type of pet (no snakes, please.) Affordable pricing. For more details, please call (931) 555-0392 and ask for Max.
Well, thought grandma Maude, that does certainly have more details than what the young man just told me....
“Well,” she said out loud, “you certainly seem like.... an industrious pair of entrepreneurs.” The family stood on the doorstep, smiling and blinking. Grandma Maude laid the paper on the table by the door. “I will definitely keep your services in mind, should I need them.” She paused. “Which I'm quite sure I will,” she said, in a voice that indicated that she certainly would not.
Alexa, having read the flyer over her grandmother's shoulder, had quickly grabbed the dog and relocated her to someplace the scary lookalike family couldn't see her. I don't know why, but I wouldn't trust them to look after a pet worm. Grandma better not go calling them when we go on vacation next week!
Normally Alexa wouldn't worry about it, but her grandmother had just had back surgery and was on all kinds of medications that clouded her ability to think. Which is why I shouldn't leave her alone with them... what if she gives them money? Alexa slammed the door on the bathroom, causing the obnoxious puppy to hit her head trying to follow Alexa, who paid her no attention and hurried back to the door.
“Thank you ma'am!” the older boy was saying, smiling even bigger than before, if that was possible.
“You're welcome. By the way, my name is Marple. Miss Jane Marple.”
“Miss Marple,” said Max with a straight face. “It is a pleasure to meet you.” The oldest boy turned to go, bumping into his younger brother, who had been standing too close. The younger boy fell off the porch.
“Mitch!” Cried the father, “are you ok?”
Oh please don't let anything be broken, thought Maude, I don't wanna deal with the paperwork. I'm so tired, I'm going to go lie down.
Mitch picked himself up, wincing. “I'm alright.”
“Next time,” said Mr. Moody, “be careful not to stand too close to your older brother.”
“Yes father,” replied Mitch.
As the weird family went off down the driveway, Maude closed the door and Alexa burst out laughing. “Miss Marple? Oh grandma! What were you thinking?”
“I'm thinking that if I laugh any harder, I'm going to bust one of these stitches and wind up back in the hospital.”
“Do you think they were keeping a straight face to be polite, or did they really not get the reference?”
Grandma laughed. “I don't know Alexa, but one thing's for sure, I'm not trusting my little Nox puppy to a bunch of strangers, especially when children under 13 would be responsible.” She picked up the flyer and handed it to Alexa. “Here dear, you can use this to clean out the cat's litterbox for me. I'd do it myself, but--”
“No grandma, you go back to bed.” Alexa took the flyer. “I'll go make sure this is put in a very safe place.”
- 6
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