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Worldly Distractions: Girls 3.5 - Only Child





The show aired on Saturday this weekend, due to the Super Bowl, which gives this recapper a nice chance to spread out this week's review. Seriously, the Sunday-Monday lineup is my hell. But oh, it is fun!

Previously on: David's dead, Hannah's a selfish twat, Jessa reunites with a long-lost friend who faked her own death, Marnie quits her job in the rudest way possible, Caroline moves in with Adam and Hannah.

We open at David's funeral, where hundreds of people are in attendance and Hannah can't stop commenting on all the celebrities. Adam tries to ground her a bit, with no results. They find themselves talking with David's wife, Annaliese. I immediately recognize Jennifer Westfeldt, writer, director, actor, and Sacred Keeper of the Holy Hamm. Wait, David's wife? Wasn't he, uh...

Well, okay, David did have a wife, and when she realizes who Hannah is, she gets very emotional and goes on about how fond David was of her. However, it turns out she's mixed her up with another author. Fortunately, the ceremony gets underway before Hannah can say anything truly terrible to the grieving widow. (And yes, it looks like she's going to.) While everyone is seated, Hannah and Adam gossip about David's sexuality. A funereal chord plays as the "Girls" logo comes up. In black, of course. Oh, dark comedy, you are the best.

Side note: I'm watching this literally minutes after hearing about PSH's death, so this is a rather untimely reminder. Life is short, folks.

Adam wants to leave after the ceremony, but Hannah sees it as an opportunity to mingle. She chats up Anneliese. They get around to David's sexuality, which clearly Annelies has discussed before, saying that "he was [gay], sometimes". Hannah starts out okay, praising David's editorial talents and generosity, but when Annelies mentions that the publisher has dropped all of David's stuff, she instantly ruins everything. Naturally making a guy's death all about her, she immediately begins hounding Annelies for information about other publishers, because she has literally no filter or sense of timing. The stunned widow tells her to "Get the fuck out of here". I am tempted to give her a standing ovation, even though this is not a theatre. In fact, punching Hannah might have been nice too.

Jessa has moved in at Shoshana's and is generally being a total nuisance leech. Shoshana, in the midst of studying for finals, is not impressed and tells her so. She then proceeds to upbraid her cousin for not being organized like her - she has a 15-Year Plan which sounds truly terrifying to a commitmentphobe like me.

Hannah tries to get her career back on track, but keeps getting interrupted by the screaming brother-sister act in the next room. As hinted at before, Adam and Caroline do not make good living companions. Hannah stops it with a screech, which I appreciate, then automatically loses all her goodwill points by making it about her, again. Adam seizes on it, lambasting Caroline for upsetting Hannah in her time of grief. While managing to casually drop in that she's found a new publisher, Hannah attempts to become a negotiator, inviting the siblings to the table to "sort this out".

Adam thinks the whole process is bullshit, and he does kind of have a point (Hannah starts by asking them to tell her they love her), but Hannah is undaunted, declaring the place a "safe space". He retaliates by giving Caroline an epic verbal smackdown. Adam Driver absolutely kills it in this scene. He's rapidly becoming one of my favorite comic actors.

Jessa is focused on self-improvement, but Shoshana points out that this needs to go further than "dork cigarettes" and suggests that she take more initiative. At that moment, Jessa spies a "Help Wanted" sign in a children's boutique. She impulsively decides to go for the job, saying she wants something with "a touch of innocence". Not sure if she'll get it, as she looks like she's wearing pajamas. Also, remember what happened last time she worked around kids?

Caroline and Adam continue to tear each other to shreds. Hannah earnestly tries to moderate, but has no skills to speak of. Caroline's on her side, anyway. That's probably not a good thing, because she then accuses Adam of having a sexual interest in her. Adam runs to the other side of the room, screaming denials. As Hannah tries to soothe him, he explains that it's Caroline's way of trying to drive a wedge between them. He lunges at Caroline, who draws him onto the couch, and yeah, it does look pretty sexual pretty fast. Once they calm down a bit, Hannah tells them to appreciate each other- she longed for a sibling for many years. Sigh. Is anything not about Hannah Horvath?

She finally gets the siblings to admit they love each other (no, not like that). Just as a reconciliation appears possible, Hannah gets a call from the other whiner-in-chief, Marnie, who has just acquired a kitten. When Hannah refuses to come over and see it, Marnie is instantly pissed. Nice friends there.

Hannah goes to see the new publisher, who talks super quickly and compares Hannah to Mindy Kaling. The publisher and her assistant seem creepily pleased with Hannah's work, laughing uproariously at her every work. Hannah's work seems good to go, but there's one caveat - the company doesn't do eBooks, so she'll have to go with paper. Naturally, she squeals at the very idea.

Marnie goes over to Ray's place, wearing a sweater that puts me in mind of http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oJOwP1cY9EQ. She proceeds to insult him in every way possible. She's come to ask him for the truth, because she's strong and independent and stuff. Uh-huh.

Luckily, she asked Ray of all people, and he proceeds to give it to her straight. He calls her a judgmental, insincere user who holds onto grudges, for starters. He also throws out "phony" more times than your average page by Salinger. Marnie can't believe this. Someone's being honest for once? But just as she's about to leave, Ray admits that he likes her. She's awful, but she's insecure, and it allows him to see the real person inside. They apologize to each other. Within seconds, they're half-naked on the kitchen table. What is it with Marnie, her friends' ex-boyfriends, and random pieces of furniture?

Hannah's father calls to mention a "small procedure", but Miss Published Writer skips right over this to blab about her new book. Noticing her dad's muted response, she wonders why he's not that enthusiastic. He tells her that a lawyer relative looked over her contract with David's company, and they still own the rights to the book. Even unpublished. For the next three years. I have to admit, that is a very shitty blow. Hannah's devastated. Her father's pretty reasonable, telling her to talk to her cousin-lawyer and consider publishing in three years - after all, they tried three years to have her, so good things can come after a struggle. She screams insults at him and hangs up. I dunno, Mr. Horvath, maybe you should have spent those three years on something else.

Marnie and Ray are awkward and postcoital, discussing vague plans. As she leaves, Marnie thanks him for his suggestions. "Nice to know I could be of service," he deadpans. He asks her to keep it a secret. "Like I'd advertise this," she scoffs. I roll my eyes. It's really hard to tell who's the worst character this episode.

Hannah reads out her contract, her voice breaking. Caroline comforts her, pointing out that she can write something else. This has no effect - Hannah just wails that she put every interesting incident of her life in the book, and now she's run out. Caroline attempts to demonstrate her sympathy with a tale of her failed audition for Independence Day. Hannah accurately calls her on her bullshit. This leads to a rant (from Caroline) on how Adam should be there, but whenever something bad happens, he just runs out the door and - Hannah cuts her off right there. As everyone remembers from last season, this is not Adam in the slightest. She tells Caroline to STFU and throws her out. Caroline calls them all spoiled brats. Despite her general awfulness, I applaud this sentiment.

Adam comes home to mixed news - his sister's gone, but Hannah's curled up miserable on the couch. Unpredictably, he flips out about Caroline, concerned for her. Despite all the fighting, she is still his sister and he feels responsible. He runs out to find her. End credits.

The characters on this show are uniformly awful, or at least the girls are. However, something still draws us in every week. I think it has something to do with Lena Dunham's exploration of the show's angry side, and her unique treatment of everyday unpleasantness. Today, this was on display in full, from Hannah's horrible funeral behavior and Marnie's conduct with Ray. On the one hand, it's strangely liberating - I like having characters that different. On the other, it's beginning to feel too much like a caricature. I by no means expect warm and fuzzy from my shows, but by God, pull back on the reins a little. There is such a thing as going too far. Hannah of all people would know about that.

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  • Posts

    • Bluebirdbluebell


      6 hours ago, no fun funddie said:

      Am I the only one who found it strange that when the ‘Bowers Girls’ are mentioned by Hayley Lina isn’t in the photos. I think Hayley mentioned Lina in relation to how her and Carver first interaction with Cass. I can understand if Lina didn’t want to be photographed but it does seem a little like she’s ignoring her by praising the others. IMG_0179.thumb.jpeg.2bd1581e92ea5b491ace4e7a73da8265.jpeg

      I agree. I also think it's weird she's deciding who the "Bower girls" are, but then I hate the gender politics around last names anyway.

    • marmalade


      5 minutes ago, dawn9476 said:

      Was it known that Hannah was having a 2nd? I know social media is private, but it seems like stuff still comes out despite that.

      Wasn't she seen pregnant at Nurie's tea party? I am pretty sure she was seen somehow.

    • dawn9476

      Posted (edited)

      Was it known that Hannah was having a 2nd? I know her social media is private, but it seems like stuff still comes out despite that.

      Edited by dawn9476
    • JermajestyDuggar


      Yet another trip. She’s just like Jill Rod in this way. She never wants to be home with her kids. 


      • Upvote 1
    • nelliebelle1197


      14 hours ago, postscript said:

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      One of her posts has a link to the retreat. Among agenda items - “time with baby Theresa” and the ability to try on and purchase prairie dresses made by Kelly. Does she really have followers who will go for this, or is it just going to be her and her besties admiring each other? 

      She is selling time with her baby? What the hell?

      • Upvote 1
      • Haha 1

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